Meta is often translated as loving kindness,
Which is not my favorite translation.
I much prefer to use it as a verb,
Befriending.
Using the word loving can be challenging in certain situations.
Yet,
Kindness does not require loving difficult experiences.
Meta is not primarily concerned with how you feel.
Our primary concern is the commitment and the intention to befriend all moments and experiences.
Sometimes it can elevate us.
Sometimes it can alleviate us.
It's important to not get attached to the outcome.
Simply remain committed to the practice.
What obscures kindness?
In one word,
Aversion.
There can also be towards ourselves an experience in a spectrum,
Ranging from feeling inadequate to having an extremely harsh inner dialogue.
It can happen for a number of reasons.
But one thing for sure,
That inner critic doesn't make anyone happy.
Kindness towards yourself is the foundation of mindfulness.
It's where the practice starts.
It's sad that the Buddha stated that you can search the whole world and you won't find anyone more deserving of kindness than yourself.
So let's now take a moment to befriend your mind.
Begin by finding a comfortable posture in which you are both relaxed and alert.
You can be seated on the floor with crossed legs or on a chair with both feet grounded on the floor and hands resting on your knees.
Upright,
Not uptight.
If you prefer,
You can lay down with legs parallel and arms extended alongside your body.
Now you can close your eyes or lower your gaze.
Welcome yourself in by placing a gentle smile on your face.
Now bring your attention to your body.
Noticing any obvious sensations.
Feeling the touch points between you and the earth.
Enjoying the support that is offered to you.
Taking advantage of this support to relax.
If there is any obvious tightness or tension in the body that you can easily soften,
Please do so.
Let's take three cleansing breaths together by inhaling through your nose and exhaling through your mouth.
Second time.
One more time.
Before we cultivate kindness,
Let's do a short contemplation on aversion.
Bring to mind a moment of emotional turbulence from the past week,
Whether from work or personal life.
What does aversion feel like?
How do I sense it in the body?
Can I stand next to it without flinching?
How does aversion feel in the heart and mind?
Is there a sense of tightness?
Does this lead to suffering or the end of suffering?
Can we stand next to that with our attention and meet it with a gentle kindness?
Holding this awareness,
Let's gently shift into cultivating kindness.
A caveat here.
Cultivating kindness towards oneself,
It's not self-indulgent or narcissistic.
It might initially not come naturally to you,
But it's a skill we can all develop with practice.
There are simple sentences that I will be offering as an invitation for you to repeat silently towards yourself.
Use what resonates with your heart and feel free to come up with your sentences,
Words or energy you would like to kindly offer to yourself.
It might help is start by visualizing yourself,
Either as the image reflected in the mirror this morning or by bringing to mind a picture of yourself as a child.
Then you can say,
May I be well?
May I be happy?
May I be healthy?
May I feel safe and secure?
May I feel loved and supported?
May I know peace and live life with ease?
Now,
Let's repeat these phrases again,
Allowing them to sink in more deeply.
Of course,
You can also use your own words.
May I be well?
May I be happy?
May I be healthy?
May I feel safe and secure?
May I feel loved and supported?
May I know peace and live life with ease?
One last time,
Let these wishes wash over you like waves of kindness.
May I be well?
May I be happy?
May I be healthy?
May I feel safe and secure?
May I feel loved and supported?
May I know peace and live life with ease?
Bring the attention back to the body.
Slowly move your fingers and your toes.
Move your head from side to side.
And when you're ready,
Open your eyes.
Welcome back.
And remember,
Kindness towards yourself is the foundation of mindfulness.
It's where the practice starts.
So keep cultivating it.
