Welcome,
My love,
To the sacred space for meditation and learning.
My name is Pamela.
I'm a sobriety coach and the founder of My Badass Recovery.
More importantly,
I'm a woman who's been in recovery for alcoholism and codependency for many,
Many years.
And so with that,
I welcome you and I thank you for spending time with me,
But more importantly,
With yourself.
Today we will talk about how to stop fighting reality and how to dive into self-compassion in sobriety.
I ask that you find a quiet spot to settle into and that you gently close your eyes as you take some deep breaths with me.
And we breathe in and out.
I'd like to do this as you listen to my voice.
During this practice,
We're going to focus on releasing ideas and stories and ways of being that no longer serve you.
I ask that you enter this space with kindness and openness and a willingness to embrace new ways.
Today I want to talk about those difficult days that we face,
Those days in which we show up and life feels very heavy.
We all have those days that feel like a step backward,
Right?
The ones that make us doubt our progress,
Where perhaps we think,
I'm not getting anywhere.
What's wrong with me?
What am I doing wrong?
Today we're going to talk about those days,
Those days that just suck and how instead of using them to shame ourselves or judge ourselves,
We can instead use them as an invitation to get closer to ourselves.
Here's the truth.
When you were an active addiction,
You used to have a way of tapping out of any emotions that were painful.
In sobriety,
You don't.
And so that means that some days are going to feel especially difficult.
It's almost like you're just walking out in the world naked with no protection whatsoever,
Just full of feelings with nowhere to escape.
So naturally these heavy days feel especially heavy for you.
But here's the secret.
Those heavy days don't have to mean anything.
Having a bad day doesn't mean that you're doing something wrong.
You don't have to beat yourself up about it.
Those tough days,
They can really just be tough days without you having to do anything about them.
In fact,
I want you to consider this.
Tough days are an invitation to get closer to yourself through self-compassion and through this beautiful idea that we stop fighting reality.
And that includes fighting yourself.
This phrase is so glorious.
Stop arguing with reality.
This is how in sobriety we embrace the concept of self-compassion.
Yeah,
Self-compassion in sobriety is more important than anything else.
It's the biggest weapon that you have against your old patterns.
Because if we dive into old patterns that include shame or self-judgment or judgment of the world,
Those old patterns then bring on old ways of being and doing,
Old behaviors,
Including going back to our addiction.
So in that sense,
Self-compassion becomes a true weapon of protection.
Now for some of us,
Feeling self-compassion is not that easy.
So today we're going to practice a little bit of a deeper way of engaging with that self-compassion.
This practice is a beautiful one that I use every time that I want to bring tenderness and grace into my heart and acceptance of the moment that I'm living.
If you don't have your eyes closed yet,
I invite you to do so.
And I want you to picture a young version of yourself at five years old.
That's a younger version of you still living inside of you,
Craving your love and your care.
I want you to imagine your big,
Innocent eyes,
Your eyes,
Looking up at you,
Longing for tenderness and understanding and care.
This is your inner child.
I want you to ask that inner child using your own name,
What do you need from me right now,
Baby?
And trust me,
The answer may surprise you.
It could be as simple as,
I need a nap.
I need a good meal.
I need a good cry.
What that child needs is to be seen,
To be heard,
To be loved exactly for who they are right now.
And for most of us,
That has been something that we haven't been able to do because we were in our addiction or trying to struggle into a sober life where we were learning to be,
Learning to have a new way.
And so this practice becomes so beautiful because for the very first time,
We are learning to say to that part of us,
That child that needs us,
That needs to be held and supported and loved and accepted by us,
That we are there for them,
Especially in the hard days.
So when life feels heavy,
When everything seems overwhelming,
Can you meet yourself with tenderness through connection with that sweet inner child?
Can you navigate the challenges with this new vision of love and self-compassion for your own self?
It's learning to love yourself unconditionally.
So if today is one of those tough days,
Please take a breath.
Sobriety is a beautiful journey of grace,
Of self-compassion,
Of tenderness,
Of loyalty to yourself,
Of accountability to yourself.
But it's hard to be accountable and it's hard to show up with your best self if you don't learn how to take care of yourself during the rough days.
As we wrap our time of learning,
Take a moment,
Give yourself thanks for the ability to pause and connect with yourself,
For the ability to release old patterns and behaviors that no longer serve you.
Take a couple of really deep breaths,
Long breaths with me.
And when you are ready,
My love,
Slowly open your eyes,
Keeping with you this sense of tenderness,
Of compassion,
And of serenity.
You can always come back to this practice.
And always remember,
My love,
You are a warrior for being in this path of recovery.
Whether you're still in the struggle to quit drinking or using,
Or you're already in the path of sobriety,
Or if you're even deeper in the process of your transformation,
I see you.
You are not alone.
I am proud of you for learning new ways to strengthen your soul and your relationship with yourself,
With the divine within you,
And with the world outside.
Keep going.
Walk fiercely into the life that was always meant to be yours.
Thank you for sharing this space with me.
