Let's close our eyes.
I was listening to a podcast the other day and the guest on the podcast was a retired Navy SEAL and he was narrating some of the incidents from his Navy days.
He mentioned about taking a step back.
Taking a step back in order to see the terrain better.
In order to see a bigger picture.
See potentially more options.
More ways of escaping danger.
One particular training that he was narrating which was profound in my opinion was a training drill for other Navy SEALs where he and his friend were leading the training.
So they were in the ravine along with the rest of the crew who had to find a way out of that ravine.
Somehow everyone was paralyzed for the first few minutes as mock deaths kept happening.
And they were wondering why can't they see a way out.
It was so obvious to them who were leading the training to see multiple options in their periphery.
Whereas everyone who was in the training was not seeing them.
One of them had to shout out to turn right and then everyone saw that right and they could escape.
It was that simple.
And this analogy works in our lives perfectly as well.
We're so focused on what is in front of us.
We're so focused on the problem.
We want to get out of this thing that is confronting us.
Making us uncomfortable.
We want the problem to go away.
But as I heard in this podcast,
The solution to the problem is not in the problem itself.
We have to take a step back to see the full problem separate from us.
What we end up doing is we think we are surrounded by the problem.
So we are the center of the problem.
We are in the problem.
Trying to get out of the problem.
But once we see the entire problem fully,
The antidote is right next to it.
We just need to step back,
So to speak.
And it's not that we have not seen problems in our life.
We've seen a lot of problems.
All kinds of problems.
And that's what has shaped us.
No matter how life-threatening every problem felt in the moment,
In the center,
We are here healthy and alive.
This simple recognition should give us that insight,
That courage to step back from whatever it is in front of us.
Not to run away,
But just to step back.
To see it fully.
Not to blame ourselves.
Not to blame others.
Not to become desperate to solve it.
To get rid of it.
Simple as pains and aches in the body.
Issues in relationships.
Cancelled flights.
You name it.
Some of us might have a habit of numbing ourselves.
Going in a shell.
Just zoning out.
Tuning out.
That doesn't help either.
We can do a little experiment to get an experiential taste of what taking a step back feels like.
As you can hear my words,
See if you can hear my words coming from a distance.
As if the words are being spoken somewhere there.
I can hear it.
But those words are not me.
I'm here.
If any thoughts are coming up,
Confusion is coming up,
Or some doubt is coming up,
Notice that it is happening there while I am here.
No matter how enticing that thought is,
Don't lean in.
Notice that there is enough distance between you and the thought,
You and the sounds,
You and the feelings,
As you take your breath in and out.
Notice that the breath is at a distance from you,
Because you can see it.
If I asked you to see your eyes,
You won't be able to see your eyes,
Because they are too close to your eyes.
But anything that is at a distance from you,
You can see it.
The fact that you can see it implies there is distance.
We just have to become aware of the distance.
You can see your breath through your mind's eye,
Of course.
You can hear me at a distance,
Of course.
If you become aware of your left knee,
The sensations in and around your left knee,
Those are happening at a distance.
This might feel like an effort,
But that feeling is also seen.
We are not creating any distance.
That would be effort.
We are just trying to see what we already understand.
We understand that for something to be seen,
For something to be heard,
There needs to be distance.
Distance between that thing and you.
What this seeing gives us is this ability to choose.
The moment there is distance,
There is time.
We have time to choose,
To react or respond,
To buy into the idea of whatever is showing up as intense emotions,
Scary thoughts,
Or just to see it as a feeling.
To be entangled by the problem or look for solutions around the problem.
This insight of seeing the distance,
Recognizing the choice,
Is one of the most intelligent uses of our power of discrimination.
To dissociate ourselves from the feeling,
From the problem,
And stand apart from it,
Just like we understand it conceptually and experientially.
If anger shows up,
We have learned this through social conditioning,
To say,
I am angry.
So we have become one with anger.
Whereas if you can see it clearly,
That there is anger,
Because you can see the anger.
That's why,
Mistakenly,
We are formulating it as,
I am angry.
But if we said it the way we saw it,
We would stand apart from the anger and then choose to be angry or not.
Same is true about sadness.
These are just feelings that are showing up,
Triggered by one thing or another.
The triggers don't matter.
Even if there is pain in the body,
I'm hurting,
Is what we have learned to say.
Instead,
There is pain.
I can see the pain.
Somehow,
Automagically,
Things stop engulfing us when too many things are happening during holiday season or otherwise.
We feel we are engulfed with whatever intense feelings we are experiencing.
But can we see those feelings separate from us?
Can we leave our identity where it belongs?
It's like saying,
I got a flat tire.
At that point,
Although we are saying that I got a flat tire,
What we imply is my car got a flat tire.
There is no mistaken identity in that statement.
We know we are we,
And we know we are not the car.
But when it comes to anger,
Sadness,
Loneliness,
Frustration,
Anxiety,
Depression,
Although we see these emotions,
Just like we see the car,
We somehow mistaken our identity.
We lose,
Or rather we relinquish our identity and become one with it.
So take a step back.
Thank you.
