All right,
So this is a practice called Ideal Parent Imagery Meditation,
Developed by a Harvard psychologist named Daniel P.
Brown,
Who really kind of wrote the textbook on attachment and attachment disorders in adults.
And he was also a long-term Buddhist meditator,
So he took a lot of inspiration from different Tibetan visualization practices.
And so I've included some notes and some tips and some background in the description,
So I would say please go ahead and read that,
Because it'll be really helpful for the context of this meditation.
But for now,
We're gonna go ahead and get into it,
Where I will invite you to imagine an ideal set of parents,
Who are not your real parents,
But a different set of parents.
And then I will guide you through this practice,
With the aim of really just creating this imagination and finding a deep felt sense of safety and attunement in the moment.
So I really recommend lying down for this,
If possible.
So I'll let you go ahead and get in a comfortable posture,
Comfortable position.
And just taking a few moments to get settled in.
Taking some nice deep breaths,
Breathing in through your nose,
And slowly out through your mouth.
Allowing any tension to soften.
And with each exhale,
Find yourself getting deeper and deeper into a sense of ease and relaxation.
Kind of like the feeling of just slipping into a warm bath.
The floor,
The earth,
Is doing all the work of supporting you and holding you.
So you can allow your muscles to relax even more.
Finding the place in your body that feels the most easeful,
The most comfortable.
And just soaking that in for a moment.
Now,
Imagining yourself as a young child.
Not with your family of origin,
But with a different set of ideal parents who are perfectly suited to your nature.
And you can shape and form these parents however you like.
If it's hard to imagine one,
You can imagine both of them.
If it's hard to imagine both of them,
You can try just imagining one.
If it's hard to imagine at all,
That's totally fine.
You can still follow along in this meditation and just see what comes up.
Bring to mind a scene where these ideal parents are with you in a way that creates an absolute secure attachment relationship.
They know how to be with you in all the ways that help you to feel absolutely secure and safe.
Just letting yourself fully imagine how it feels like to be completely safe and connected with these ideal parents.
Notice how they're being with you,
Physically,
Emotionally,
Verbally,
That let you know you're completely safe.
And notice the effect that this has on your state of mind.
You never have to worry about your safety.
If there's anything you need to change about the way they're being with you,
That contributes to you feeling more safe and more comfortable.
You can change this in any way you like.
Notice how you can trust these parents every time you're with them.
Staying connected to your body and breathing.
Gently letting the scene fade.
Now imagining another scene with your ideal parents where they're so deeply attuned to you and your needs.
They're fully present and genuinely accessible to you.
And you can count on them to be with you whenever you need them.
They notice what you're doing.
And from what they see,
They tune right in to what you need.
By the look on your face,
They might notice what you're feeling inside.
They're curious about your experience,
Helping you feel truly seen and known.
And they know just how much is right for you.
Never pushing you too far beyond what you're ready for.
But when you are ready to learn and move ahead,
These parents are right there to help you take those next steps.
And so you can always,
Always turn to them for understanding.
So just notice the effect this has on your body and mind.
Gently letting the scene fade.
Now imagining a scene where you were emotionally upset as a child.
Only this time,
Your ideal parents see it immediately and respond in exactly the way you need.
Imagine the sort of comfort they offer.
Maybe it's physical closeness,
Gentle touch,
Verbal reassurance.
They know just the right way to soothe you.
Let yourself just feel the impact of receiving that comfort right now.
Notice the ways that they're with you that help you calm down and feel so much better,
So much more at ease.
And they're capable of accepting and containing your strongest feelings,
Helping you accept and contain them too,
So that you feel safe with all your feelings.
You can always count on them.
Gently letting the scene fade.
Now imagining another scene where your ideal parents are openly and consistently expressive.
Expressive in their delight and appreciation of you,
Both in what you do and who you are.
And they're not subtle about their joy.
When you're with them,
They let you know about their delight,
About you simply being you,
Just as you are.
You can feel that they genuinely love you and they communicate this love and delight to you in all the ways that you can really take in.
You really feel it.
Just notice how they do that and what it is about them that makes it so very clear that they're absolutely delighted in who you are.
And just letting that sense of delight and acceptance wash over you,
Hold you,
Total acceptance.
Noticing how this affects your state of mind,
Body,
Especially your sense of self-esteem.
And gently letting the scene fade.
And now imagining yourself as a child exploring something new.
Curious,
Adventurous.
And your ideal parents are right there.
They're offering total support.
They're not threatened by your independence.
They have no hidden agenda.
They simply want you to become your best,
Strongest,
And most authentic self.
They help you see that emotions are not dangerous,
But are natural ways of learning about yourself and expressing unmet needs.
They validate your feelings.
And in doing so,
You begin to explore not just your outer experience,
But your inner experience in a creative way with an attitude of openness and discovery.
You feel inspired to try new things.
You feel yourself becoming more adventurous.
Isn't it wonderful to just feel their support as you now go off on your own to see what you find?
Might even just imagine receiving that kind of support and encouragement at every stage of your development.
How would that shape your sense of identity?
And then gently letting the scene fade.
Lastly,
Bringing to mind something that you deeply needed as a child.
Something you never quite received,
No matter how many times you reach for it.
Just let that familiar emotional need come to the surface.
And just imagining your ideal parents stepping in.
They recognize exactly what you're feeling in that situation.
And this time they respond in the perfect way.
The way you always needed.
Letting yourself receive that response.
Letting it begin the process of healing.
Letting that scene fade.
And taking a nice deep breath,
Breathing in through the nose.
And out through the mouth.
Taking a moment to notice the overall effect this practice has had on your state of mind,
Your body,
Your heart.
And take as much time as you need to settle with this experience.
Staying here for a few more minutes or journaling,
Going for a walk,
Whatever you feel called to do.
Just following that impulse.
And for now,
I'll just count down from five to one.
And with each count,
You'll find yourself gently returning to the present moment.
Five.
Four.
Three.
Two.
Fully awake.
Grounded.
Right here.
You might wiggle your fingers and toes.
Maybe move your head side to side.
If you'd like,
You can even take your hands and just start to pat your body.
Just feeling the boundaries of your body,
Your arms,
Your chest.
Your belly.
Your legs.
Just tapping gently.
Really making contact with the body.
Until you feel it's the right moment to open your eyes and do the next thing that you want to do.
Thank you so much for taking this time.
And please take some time to digest.
Reflect on your experience,
As always.
And you can come back to this as many times as you want.
Whenever you feel the need.
