Trauma Healing For The Inner Child

This meditation can be used to explore situations where you feel stuck and find yourself repeating the same unhealthy pattern over and over. It might be a way of interacting, it might be people pleasing, it might be an emotional response, it could be anything. It's a current behavior that is based on an experience, so could be a small t trauma response. I don't recommend doing this for big t traumatic responses without adequate support or adequate understanding of nervous system regulation.

Transcript

Welcome to this inner child healing meditation.

It's a practice for helping you to heal certain habits that you find yourself repeating over and over again that might be rooted in something that happened in your past.

So something like trauma,

More so small t trauma.

I don't recommend doing this for big t trauma without the support of somebody else there with you or unless you have a solid nervous system regulation practice already in your life.

So getting comfortable,

Whether that's sitting or lying down and you're comfortable with having the eyes closed,

Gently closing the eyes,

Softening the forehead,

Softening the eyes,

Softening around the eyes,

Softening the cheeks,

The jaw,

The shoulders,

Arms,

Hands,

Legs,

Feet.

Inviting the body just to let go,

To soften,

To be spacious.

Making any adjustments you need to feel a little more comfortable.

You need to adjust legs,

Arms,

Shoulders,

Back.

Whenever you're ready just settling into stillness,

Softening the body,

Belly and the chest.

Responding to the natural rhythm of the breath.

Noticing your breath,

Noticing where you feel the breath,

The bellies,

The chest,

The throat,

The tip of the nose.

Where can you feel your breath?

We'll just take three deep belly breaths together.

So as you breathe in,

The belly will expand.

As you breathe out,

The belly folds.

So breathing out and then deep expansive nourishing breath in,

Nourishing the body with that fresh air,

That fresh oxygen,

Energy,

Life force.

And then sighing out on the out-breath,

Just letting go of the day,

Letting go of your thoughts,

Thriving in your body.

Another time,

Deep expansive breath in,

Nourishing the body.

And sighing out on the exhale,

Letting go of the day,

Letting go of your thoughts,

Arriving in your body.

And then one last time,

Deep expansive breath in,

The belly rises,

Chest expands.

Sighing out on the out-breath,

Letting it all go,

Letting the body settle,

And letting the breath settle,

Letting the breath return to its own natural rhythm,

Body breathing all on its own.

You don't need to tell it what to do.

And knowing that at any time during this practice,

If you do find yourself getting agitated or stressed,

Just come back to the breath,

Take a few deep expansive breaths.

You need to open your eyes and just ground yourself,

Feel free to do so.

Just doing what you need to do to help yourself feel safe.

Beginning by bringing back a recent event where you repeated this pattern that you're working on healing.

The more recent,

The better.

But if there's nothing super recent,

Just bringing back whatever memory you can.

And just picturing it in your mind.

So picturing where you were,

Who was there,

What was there,

What was happening.

There were people,

What was that involved,

What was the interaction?

What were your surroundings,

The shapes,

The colors,

Maybe even smells and sounds.

And as you bring it all back,

Noticing what thoughts are there,

Without getting caught up in those thoughts,

Staying very much in your body.

Just noticing,

Are there thoughts there?

What are they saying?

Staying connected with your breath.

And noticing what emotions are there.

Labeling whatever emotions are there.

Is it sadness?

Is it anger?

Frustration?

Grief?

Shame?

Often there is shame alongside these emotions,

These more triggering,

Challenging ones where we're stuck in.

Whatever emotions are there,

Giving yourself full permission to feel them.

These are normal human emotions.

Everybody feels them.

It's a natural,

Normal,

Normal experience.

So giving yourself full permission to have these emotions,

Maybe even affirming it to yourself.

I'm allowed to feel this way.

It's okay to feel this way.

It is safe to feel this way.

And as you notice these emotions,

Notice your body.

How does your body feel?

Maybe you can feel these emotions in a particular body part.

And what does it feel like?

Does it have a shape?

Does it have a color?

Do you feel like a squeezing,

Punching,

Tangling,

A tightness?

Numb?

Does it feel numb?

How do these feelings feel in your physical body?

And noticing how you respond to this part of you.

Is there a sense of,

No,

I shouldn't be feeling this way?

Or is there a sense of,

Okay,

It's okay.

This is,

This is fine.

I'm allowed to feel this.

So is there a sense of acceptance or rejection?

And what's that like to,

To reject this part of you?

Say that you shouldn't be this way,

That it's not okay to be this way.

What's that like to reject this part of you if there is rejection?

And if there's acceptance,

What it's like to accept this part of you?

And is there something you could do to love,

To show this part of you a little more love?

To reassure it,

To tell it,

It's okay.

I see you.

I hear you.

I understand that you're afraid or,

Or whatever it is.

It's being,

Is there any way you could show some compassion,

Some kindness,

Or just some understanding?

You don't have to agree with this part of you.

How could you under,

Be more understanding towards it?

Maybe placing a hand on that body on that body part can be supportive,

Recognizing that it's there.

And then exploring,

Well,

What is your earliest,

Earliest memory of these feelings?

When is your earliest memory of,

Of having these feelings,

These behaviors,

These thought patterns?

What needs are these patterns trying to have met?

What does this,

What is this behavior trying to achieve at the core level?

More often than not,

It's,

It's this desire to be loved,

Right?

More often than not,

It's a contorted way of trying to,

To be loved or to be in connection with,

Or sometimes to be seen,

To be heard.

Well,

What need is it trying to have met?

And if you're finding yourself getting agitated,

Just come back to the breath,

Take some deep breaths.

Even if you're not getting agitated,

Just take a few moments to take a few deep belly breaths as you connect in with this early memory and,

And check in what,

What need is trying to be met here.

And then seeing how could,

How could you now today provide for this need?

If it's love,

What could you do to show you or show this part of you a little more love?

And sometimes it's just words of assurance of saying,

I know as a child,

We didn't have the tools and skills,

So we developed this habit,

But I'm here now,

We're older now,

We,

We,

We have different ways of,

Of getting love,

But really acknowledging this part of you and saying,

I'm here for you,

I see you,

I'm here for you,

And I'm doing what I can to take care of you.

So in your own words,

Having this,

Saying something reassuring and loving and caring towards this,

This younger part of you and noticing if there's any,

Any resentment,

Any shame there,

Both towards your child self or,

Or other,

Other people involved,

Just exploring the possibility of showing some forgiveness.

When you show forgiveness,

A little curved forgiveness towards your child self or,

Or other people involved,

Recognizing that everyone was trying their best,

Given the tools,

Knowledge,

And resources that they had at the time,

Maybe most likely it wasn't enough,

And you needed more support,

You needed other things,

But it just wasn't available at the time.

So is there any way of just feeling,

Extending a little forgiveness towards you or the other people involved?

And maybe that's not possible right now,

And that's okay,

But just being curious about what might it be like to extend a little forgiveness for yourself more than anything else,

So you can let go and not have to carry this weight.

And again,

Coming back to the breath,

Taking some deep breaths if you need to,

And coming back to that,

That what can you do now to take care of this part of you?

How can you reassure?

So maybe it's sending a little love in,

In through your hand,

Resting your hand where the strong sensations were,

And sending that love,

That warmth in.

Maybe it's giving yourself a hug,

A kiss.

Maybe it's setting some intention to do some self-care activities.

Maybe it's making the intention to regularly check in with this part of yourself,

Or to regularly reassure this part of yourself.

What can you do to better take care of this part of you,

To look after this part of these needs?

And then letting all that imagery go,

And then,

You know,

Maybe you got through the whole practice.

Maybe you only got to the very first stage of recognizing,

Feeling,

You know,

Feeling the impact.

All of the stages of this journey,

This practice,

Have value,

Even if you did just do that very first part.

That is valuable in itself,

And maybe you'll come back to it again,

And you'll get a little further along.

So just give yourself a little grace.

Show yourself the patience.

You deserve healing.

It takes time.

You know,

This is a poignant memory.

It had a big,

Big impact on you.

It's okay.

If you can't do this full practice straight away,

It'll take time.

All good things,

All things worth doing,

Take time.

Sustainable change,

Long-lasting change takes time.

Be patient.

Be kind with yourself.

Still keeping the eyes closed if they're closed.

Coming back to your body,

Your body in the chair,

Or on the floor,

Wherever it is,

Whatever is in contact with the body.

Noticing contact between your body and the floor,

The bed,

Or the chair.

Noticing the air on your skin.

Noticing sounds.

What can you hear?

What can you smell?

And then just on your own,

Taking a few deep breaths.

As you breathe in,

Just breathing in,

Breathing in support,

Breathing in love,

Breathing in care.

And as you breathe out,

Letting go of what no longer serves you.

Breathing in the support,

The love,

And the care.

Breathing out,

Letting go of what no longer serves you.

Providing the body to be soft and spacious.

And then as you breathe deeply,

Gently opening the eyes and starting to orient yourself in the room.

Just looking at a few objects and labeling them as you see them.

Maybe labeling chair,

Light,

Wall.

Coming back to the room gradually,

Slowly.

Recognizing you're safe.

You need to give yourself a hug or a squeeze or rest a hand somewhere.

And just take your time.

Feel free to stay here a little longer.

It'd be nice to do a bit of journaling after this practice to see what came up for you.

And please don't hesitate to comment or to reach out on the on the on the on inside timer.

If you have any questions,

Need any extra support,

Do what you need to do to take care of yourself as you go about the rest of your day.

Thanks for joining.