Living The Serenity Prayer

In this deeply personal and powerful talk, Rev. Carol Wilke explores the deeper spiritual meaning of the Serenity Prayer—not as a recitation, but as a living practice. Through the lenses of acceptance, courageous action, and divine wisdom, Carol shares insights from her journey of recovery and transformation. With humor, heart, and honesty, she invites us to reflect on what in our lives is asking for serenity, where courage is calling us to act, and how we might cultivate the wisdom to know the difference.

Transcript

I want to begin with a prayer that's found its way into the hearts of millions of people all over the world.

It's simple,

It's humble,

And yet it holds an ocean of wisdom.

God,

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

The courage to change the things I can,

And the wisdom to know the difference.

What if this prayer is more than just words?

What if it holds a deep metaphysical truth about the nature of reality,

About free will,

And about divine guidance?

The serenity prayer is really a three-part formula for spiritual and metaphysical alignment.

Serenity is a frequency of peace.

Courage is the energy of change,

And wisdom is the sacred balance between the two.

So let's start with serenity.

God,

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.

What does serenity mean?

Well,

It's more than peace.

It's this inner calm in the face of outer storms.

Serenity is not the absence of difficulty at all,

But it's the presence of deep acceptance within the difficulty.

It is the art of surrender.

There are so many countless things outside our control—the choices of others,

The timing of life,

The change of seasons,

The fragility of health,

And even the past itself.

Serenity does not mean that we stop caring.

It doesn't mean that we simply give up.

It means that we release the tight grip of resistance and choose to soften into the reality around us.

We start to practice non-resistance to the flow of the universe.

When we resist reality,

We create this inner turmoil.

When we fight what cannot be changed,

We burn ourselves out in the battle.

But when we embrace serenity,

We find peace even amidst the storm.

Serenity always whispers to us,

I may not have chosen this path,

But I can walk it in grace.

Think of a river that flows effortlessly among the rocks.

It doesn't deny that the rocks are there.

It doesn't try to remove them.

It just flows around them with strength and softness at the same time.

Acceptance aligns us with divine order and the higher frequencies of peace.

Surrender was a really tough concept for me when I got sober.

In my addiction,

I saw the world as something I controlled and I think I was so obnoxious about it.

In fact,

That was so true that somebody gave me a card once for my birthday.

It said,

The things I've learned,

A universal remote does not in fact control the universe.

And then when you opened up the card,

It said,

I did not get you a universal remote for your birthday because I knew you would just be disappointed.

I tried to hammer it everything to make it work for me.

Not only is it exhausting,

But it just doesn't work.

One of my favorite parts in the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous is on page 417.

And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today.

When I am disturbed,

It's because I find some person,

Place,

Thing,

Or situation unacceptable to me.

Some fact of my life.

And I can find no serenity until I accept that person,

Place,

Thing,

Or situation as being exactly the way it's supposed to be in this moment.

Unless I accept life completely on life's terms,

I cannot be happy.

I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and my attitudes.

This was revolutionary for me when I first got sober.

I probably read that a hundred times during the first year of sobriety because I needed to keep reminding myself of that.

Surrender is not a weakness or a sense of losing,

But of realizing that we belong to a life that is so much larger than we are.

And we come to accept life just as it is.

When we surrender,

We can open ourselves up to help and hope.

We can realize that life is always for us and never against us.

And we begin to have an awareness that there are always hands reaching out to us to help us take a step up.

We tend to think of serenity as a passive word,

But it really isn't.

It's an active spiritual state of being.

When we move into thoughts of acceptance,

Our energetic field shifts.

When we can combine that with gratitude and mindfulness,

Then we can really start to experience a state of inner calmness and inner serenity.

And so just close your eyes for a moment and ask yourself,

What in my life right now is asking for my serenity?

Then next comes courage.

Courage to change the things that I can.

Serenity is not passivity.

It's not resignation.

There are things in our lives that are within our power to change,

Even if they are hard and even if they take time and even if they require all the strength that we can gather.

Courage is not the absence of fear.

It's action in the presence of fear.

Courage might look like speaking the truth when silence feels safer,

Setting a boundary even when it makes us feel uncomfortable,

Choosing to heal,

To forgive,

To grow,

Even when the past is heavy,

And pursuing a dream when it feels like the odds are stacked against us.

And sometimes courage is quiet.

Courage can be the small daily choice to get out of bed every morning,

To reach out for help,

To try again after a failure.

Courage is the power of conscious creation,

Of manifesting through our intention and our action.

Courage is the force that bridges thought with a manifestation.

And courage is the willingness to align our inner reality with divine truth.

Courage declares,

I am not powerless.

There is always something I can do.

And so close your eyes again and ask yourself,

Where in my life is courage calling me to act?

And finally we come to the bridge between serenity and courage,

Which is wisdom,

And the wisdom to know the difference.

This is perhaps the hardest part,

To discern with clarity whether a situation calls for acceptance or brave action.

Wisdom is what keeps serenity from becoming apathy and courage from becoming recklessness.

It grows in the quiet spaces of reflection,

In prayer,

In trusted conversations with friends or our sponsor,

In the stillness of our hearts.

It grows with experience and it grows with humility.

Wisdom always recognizes what is mine to carry and what belongs to another,

When to speak and when to stay silent,

When to persist and when to let go.

Wisdom listens beneath the noise of fear and pride and asks the question,

What is life inviting me to do here?

And here's the beautiful thing,

Even when we aren't sure,

Even when we don't yet know the answer,

We can trust that wisdom grows with time.

Every experience,

Every reflection,

Every challenge teaches us wisdom.

And so wisdom becomes discernment,

The bridge between acceptance and action.

It's divine intelligence and inner knowing.

A great example of this was Solomon from the Bible and he was this biblical king who was really most famous for his wisdom.

And in the biblical story,

God appeared to him in a dream asking Solomon what he wanted from God.

Solomon asked for wisdom in order to better rule and guide his people.

And so as we close,

I want to invite you to take a moment of quiet reflection.

Place your hand over your heart,

If that feels comfortable.

Close your eyes and just take a deep breath and ask yourself gently,

Where in my life can I practice serenity?

Where in my life can I summon courage?

And how can I cultivate the wisdom to know the difference?

The serenity prayer isn't a magic spell.

It's a daily practice.

It's a compass that guides us through life's uncertainties.

It's a balm for the anxious heart and a fire for the soul that seeks to make a difference.

And so today and every day,

Let these words be more than just a prayer.

Let them be a way of living.

And so we'll end with just this simple prayer.

God,

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

The courage to change the things that I can,

And the wisdom to know the difference.

And so it is.

Reviews

Especially loved the wisdom remarks 💙

Such an enlightening talk 🙏🏻✨💕

And so it is 🙏

Love this prayer🙏🏻
Your reflection is appreciated and I will be sharing with loved ones♥️
Will return to this wisdom again

Much needed for me today (and everyday). 🙏🏽

With the current political climate my sister and I have used the Serenity Prayer daily. I love this talk and plan to listen to it frequently. Thank you. 💕