This is a fierce self-compassion meditation for helping us to develop a fierce sense of self-compassion as we go through the world.
This manifests as a brave,
Empowered clarity.
I'd like to acknowledge Dr.
Kristin Neff and her work.
I adapted this meditation based on her work.
Okay,
So to begin,
First get into a comfortable,
Erect,
Alert position.
Now if you can,
Close your eyes.
Get as comfortable and present as you can in your body.
Now think of a situation in your life where you need to protect yourself,
To stand up for yourself,
To prevent someone from taking advantage of you.
Perhaps there is someone imposing themselves on you or their views on you.
Recall the situation carefully in your mind's eye.
Try not to focus too much on the person causing the situation.
Instead,
Focus on the harm itself.
What's happening?
What is going on?
See it clearly in your mind's eye.
Now try to allow yourself to feel whatever emotions come up for you in this situation.
Inquire within.
Look deeply.
What do you feel?
Is there fear,
Anger,
Frustration?
Now note that you can drop the story of what's happening and just contact the physical sensation in your body of these painful emotions.
Allow the physical sensations to be there.
Honor them.
Now embody a posture of strength.
Sit up.
Roll your shoulders back.
Feel the power in your body.
Now if you can,
Say a few phrases to yourself to cultivate self-compassion in an empowered form.
First,
Just be mindful of what's happening,
Focusing on the harm,
Not the person causing the harm.
You might say,
I clearly see the truth of what's happening and it is not okay.
The person is crossing the line.
This isn't fair.
Bring mindful clarity to what's happening.
Now you want to balance this with your also your practice of appreciation.
This is not okay but it is exactly as it must and can only be in this moment.
So you see you're making a discernment that this is destructive.
This is not acceptable to you but you also appreciate that this is the reality at this moment and you're not passing a negative judgment on this moment or on the other person.
Second,
Say,
I'm not alone in this.
Empower yourself by remembering our common humanity.
You might say,
I'm not alone in this.
Other people experience this often.
I'm going to stand up for myself and I'm gonna stand up for everyone else.
Contemplate your connection with others.
Now put a fist over your heart if you like.
If you want,
This is a gesture of strength and bravery.
See if you can commit to being kind to yourself by keeping yourself safe.
That's a kindness.
You might assert yourself confidently by saying,
I will stand up for myself.
I will not yield.
I'm strong enough to take this on.
I can say no.
Whatever feels right to you.
If you're having difficulty finding the right words,
What would you say to someone else you care about to help them to stand up to be strong and to have courage?
Can you offer a similar message to yourself?
Finally,
Put your other hand over your fist so you are holding your fist tenderly.
Combine fierce energy,
Brave,
And empowered clarity with the tender,
Nurturing energy of self compassion.
Give yourself full permission to feel the force of your resolve.
Let this force be fierce and caring.
Aim your fierce energy at the situation,
Not at the person causing harm.
Remind yourself that they're still human.
Commit to taking action to protect yourself,
But don't dehumanize the other person.
Keep the thread of loving kindness for this person alive.
Let these fierce and tender energies mingle in your body.
If you're feeling a little activated,
Ask yourself,
What do you need to take care of yourself?
And make sure you do so.
This practice really helps you to ground yourself in a sense of courage and fierceness and at the same time combine that with compassion,
Letting go of negative judgments of yourself,
The situation or others,
And acceptance of the situation,
But at the same time empowering yourself to act with love to benefit yourself and others.
