Coming Out Of The Simulation And Into Peace

In this excerpt from our Weekly Sangha on IT, we look at how we come out of the simulation we are living, always imagining ourselves somewhere other than where we are and coming back into the peace of the present moment.

Transcript

It's like our little character is running through this game and there's all these obstacles I mean it's really we can be driving down driving down the freeway perfectly safe everything is okay but in our mind our little avatar is facing all these obstacles and it's trying to get over there because it believes that if it gets over there it's not just going to get the extra points it's going to find eternal happiness and be complete it's going to find the peace over there that that this whole game this is this is and it's kind of why I call it the ego game the series that we just did that's all up on on my teacher's page uh it's like a game we are running through there is no prize for getting things done faster for acquiring more things for getting more titles for stressing ourselves out there is no prize for any of this for getting your to-do list done faster than just some imaginary goal that you had in your head but there is a price I mean we lose we we we don't we miss our lives we miss our lives entirely because we're so lost in the game I'm winning right this is what we think I'm winning all of a sudden something something good happens yay you know someone gave you some praise you got a promotion you got a book deal something like something happened yay like that's awesome enjoy it don't deny the good feelings but don't go up into the image and like look now I'm winning I'm ahead right you think your little Mario character is like further ahead now right because as long as you're up there then you're you're just in the illusion you're just always in the illusion and you're never appreciating where you are right we we rush through every part of our lives as though there's some prize at the end and we never get to that we never get to the completion right the game just starts again oh it starts again oh I got there it was exciting for a few moments and now I'm sad because actually it didn't fulfill me the way I thought it should have and again that doesn't mean that we don't enjoy the good things in life and and not that we don't even in have the the desires to say you want to get promoted or you want to you want to get a book deal you want to go on a holiday you want something like there's nothing wrong with wanting things or even wanting to improve in your career to learn something to make a change there's nothing wrong with any of those things but the moment we attach a belief to I'll be happy when I get there all that's going to happen is as we're driving around we're brushing our teeth we're showering we're eating our meals we're just lost in the game am I getting there am I getting there oh no I'm falling behind because something happened oh no you know and we're just watching this little game you know our little our little avatar going back and forth missing our entire lives and then ultimately for the big disappointment because we get there and it's like yay and it feels good and it should feel good but we don't understand that it's fleeting that that new promotion the new title the new partner the new car the new holiday they're just fleeting experiences they can't complete you so then the disappointment sets in that didn't work what next well I guess it wasn't the the VP role I guess I better go for the senior VP role let me go back up and start chasing again you know we're rushing through every little I mean just the little things we're in we're in in our house doing the dishes doing the dishes I talk about the dishes a lot because we tend to think of like doing the dishes is not part of life and we're rushing through the dishes you know the mind there's nothing really it's nothing even that I just want to get done with the dishes so I can I don't know hop on the sofa and watch something right you've got something to watch on Netflix with your partner or something and you're rushing through the dishes the dishes by the way that at one point you were on a dopamine high buying that we're going to complete you or the new pots and pans that we're going to complete you at one point right rushing through not appreciating what you've got right there not feeling the peace that is inherent here in this moment we're so lost in the addiction of the stress hormones that because we've got one foot on the brake one foot on the accelerator and we're so lost in that feeling of always like oh got to get somewhere I got to push back on that because it's stopping me from getting over there and we're so addicted to the stress even though it doesn't feel good that we we don't even realize how unpleasant the experience is and that we have completely forgotten how to be just how to be I mean we tell ourselves oh your soup maybe you're going through a busy stressful time in your life and and we all do this when we're busy oh I just can't wait until I just can't wait until this is all over and I have nothing to do when there's just absolutely nothing it's going to be so great right an image me peaceful nothing to do on the other side of all this and then whenever we have those moments when there's nothing going on instead of enjoying it instead of like this is great there's nothing going on you go I'm bored I don't like this something's wrong let me go back up into my little avatar here there's an obstacle I'm bored right we spend time fantasizing about it only to get there and it's like well I didn't really mean nothing right because we don't know how to be we don't know how to feel like to feel the joy of existing to feel and appreciate and be okay and and to just feel that sense of peace of openness of spaciousness to use our senses to see and to hear and to touch and to taste and to smell you know we're eating one meal thinking about the next meal I mean this we're not tasting what's going on right now we don't even know how to taste anymore right maybe the first bite oh this is so good and then we're just shoveling in more we're not even chewing it all the way we're talking we're watching something we're thinking about the next meal we're thinking about how quickly now can I I was all morning you're thinking about what you're going to have for lunch you're you're trying to get through your lunch because now you got to get back to the office you know it's this endless chase endless chase it's a it's it's like we're living in and as you know um Kim because you're doing the series in the ego game like I start out by talking it's like we're living in a VR headset that's the illusion we every time we go up in this VR headset we split ourselves into two and the one that's in control is the one in the VR headset that's what's directing this and we go rushing oh yes I got to go get there the body's moving through time and space fast stressed anxious oh they're coming to get me even though no one's coming to get me the clock's ticking even though there is no clock ticking I got to get there faster right because this little image in our head is like a little tyrant cracking the whip get over there get over there and you get there okay that was good now get over there okay let me get over there oh this is a problem got stuck in traffic what a nightmare right we are we are we are giving all of our attention to the game the video game the VR headset the delusion and we are missing our lives even when you are present this is part of the challenge it's almost because again the addiction of the stress that we're under so much of the time even just that little bit of tension just that little just just a little bit I got to get there a little faster it doesn't feel like really big just a little bit I got to get there a little faster just a little bit I got to get there a little faster we're so addicted to that that when we feel the peace like the peace that comes for moments just a few moments when we get there not because of anything in the external world but simply because the chasing went away for a few moments the illusion went away from how I got there that's what feels so good that piece of I'm out of the game for a few minutes but even then it's like oh I better not stay here too long there's something to do there's somewhere to be got to get back to the stress we don't even trust the peace of the present moment it's almost uncomfortable to some degree it feels good in the first few moments and then it's like it's like a it like a drug addict need that adrenaline again need that cortisol need that dopamine you know the little itch got to get back up in there so there is a little bit of discomfort in that in not you know kind of not going back up into the game there's a little bit of discomfort there and going no I'm just going to be with it I'm just going to feel it breathe it's not going to kill you you can feel your feelings they're not going to kill you and just come in and feel it wow I was I was so lost there I'm back but it does those those first few breaths can feel a little bit uncomfortable as you're more consciously bringing yourself into the game consciously bringing yourself into the present moment actually always consciously bringing yourself into the present moment right becoming more conscious more aware and then it's like ah okay and like we talked about in the meditation and and at the beginning of our talk okay there's a little stress and anxiety here no problem no problem whatever's here is here and I can open my heart to whatever it is that's here and I can breathe and I can create space and I can allow it to be here right oh stress it's okay you're here it's okay you can be here it's okay anxiety you can be here befriending our emotions we're not again anytime we're pushing back anytime we're resisting creating a reversion that's the illusion right because how do we push back in our thoughts this shouldn't be happening I shouldn't have said that I'm such an idiot I'm such a loser that's how we push back I'm such an idiot I'm such a loser that's how we push back in our thoughts so any pushing back is still the illusion oh anger you're here okay okay my love my anger okay not the story but come into it and still you can talk right self-compassion is kind self-talk talking to ourselves in a way that brings us into our experience versus pushing us off the edge all right so coming in just you can be with this breathe and feel it and it's okay and it's okay to feel whatever it is that I'm feeling right now it is okay to feel this let me just keep breathing and allowing it to be and then the peace that a few minutes ago you were telling yourself you're not getting there fast enough you're like oh it was here it was here the whole time and it wasn't because I needed to have some experience of being peaceful I just needed to be with my experience I just needed to feel it I just needed to accept and welcome it and open my heart to it and it was here

Reviews

Beautifully clear discussion of the ego game. Allow and feel all feelings and we come to the present moment, rest in it and find the peace that was always there 🙏🏼

This is always such a great reminder. Makes me think of a part of the book Alice through the looking glass, where the red queen is telling Alice to run as fast as she can to stay in the same place. 🤔😊🤪