Hi,
Welcome back.
I'm Melissa.
So today,
We're going to talk about fitting in or being you.
What does it have to be one at the expense or the cost of the other?
You know,
Today,
We live in this age of social media,
Right?
That's where you're probably watching me right now.
And we are so influenced.
There's just so much information out there.
How to dress,
How to look,
How to behave,
What to say,
What music to like,
How to be in a relationship,
How to deal with your parents,
How to be at school,
What things to learn.
I mean,
It's like infinite and it gets really,
Really overwhelming.
Sometimes,
We don't even know who we are anymore because we're just so influenced by all the information that's out there.
So how do we tap into that?
How do we get to know who we are?
Well,
The most important thing is kind of to quieten the noise in your head.
So I always recommend a little bit of fasting,
Screen time,
Rest.
So make sure that you kind of watch the amount of time that you spend on social media would be one thing.
The other thing is also to really feel in to what is true for you.
So what you're reading on social media,
All the information that you're being handed through your friends,
Through your family,
Rather than just accept everything that's being given to you,
You want to tune in and feel whether or not that's true for you because it's okay if it isn't.
And if it isn't,
It's even more important for you to feel like you belong in your truth.
Like,
What is real for you,
You claim that,
You claim your truth,
Which means being able to speak up to your friends,
Speak up to your family,
Speak up to your peers and say to them,
Well,
I don't agree with you and this is why.
You belong to you.
It's not about you trying to fit into another group.
It's about you fitting in with you.
Because at the end of the day,
If people don't agree with you,
That's entirely their prerogative.
In the same way,
You don't have to agree with other people.
And the beautiful thing about this when you voice your views and your beliefs and you share your experience with other people is that it acts as a natural filter.
You find your group of people who believe in the same things,
Who are aligned with you so that you can have the same sort of conversations or you can talk about the same things.
There is one important thing I want to add here is that in as much as you want to be able to share who you are,
What is incredibly important is that you still remain open because the greatest growth we have is by mixing with people that we actually don't agree with.
Because the more perspectives that we have on life,
The richer our experience.
There is a quote and I can't remember who the man who said it.
I think it was Jim Rohn or Jim Roth.
He says,
You are the average of the five people that you spend the most time with.
So if you're spending time with the same five people every day,
Every week,
Every month,
You're limiting yourself to the,
You're limiting your exposure to the amount of information that you're putting yourself out with.
If every week you see different people,
Then you're exposing yourself to different narrative,
To different belief systems,
To different cultures,
To different music,
To different food,
Etc,
Etc,
Etc.
And so your awareness of life,
Your experience of life is so much broader.
So you could still be you and you can be you ever changing,
Ever evolving,
Being present for how life is going to unravel itself for you in your curiosity.
So there's this thing,
Right?
This thing about showing up as you.
There's this thing about discovering who you are,
Discovering what is important to you and being able to kind of stand in your ground and own your space,
Claim your space and voice your beliefs.
And with all the enthusiasm that we have as we're growing up,
We want to get out there and we want to shout to the world who we are.
But there's one thing that nobody told me when I was growing up,
Which is part of my power,
Part of knowing who I am,
Part of claiming my space is also claiming that space of silence.
It's actually not saying anything.
It's more about being present and absorbing,
Discerning,
Collecting,
Curating all the information that's coming to me in life.
And then I can discern and weave all that information together and feel into or make sense of what is aligned for me.
So in moments when you might be like,
Oh,
I don't agree with that and I need to speak up about this to claim my space,
I'd love for you also to consider that claiming your space in silence is also incredibly powerful.
That's something for you to chew on this week.
So thanks for being here.
Please drop me your comments and your curiosities down below there.
In the text and I'll see you again next time.
Bye.
