Beginning by taking a few comfortable deep breaths.
Just feeling the body rise and fall.
Each time we arrive at a meditation,
We arrive at the momentum of all of the previous moments.
And the way that we can escape the gravitational pull of all of this momentum is by grounding our awareness and the sensations of this particular moment.
So let's begin by sweeping through the body to be sure we're not holding any undue tension.
Starting at the top of the head,
Relax the brow.
Relax the muscles behind the eyes,
Letting the eyes succumb to gravity,
Just sinking down half a millimeter.
Relaxing the face and back of the jaw.
Relaxing the neck and the shoulders.
The upper arms,
Forearms,
Wrists,
And relaxing the hands.
The hands have more nerve endings than many other parts of the body.
So tuning into the high definition sensations of the palms of the hands and tips of the fingers.
Not trying to control the breath at all,
Just letting the body breathe as it will,
Noticing the natural tightening and relaxing of the upper chest and upper back as the breath comes and goes.
Relaxing the belly and the lower back.
Relaxing the hips and the upper legs.
The knees and calves.
The ankles and relaxing the feet.
Getting a general sense of the body's experience,
Perhaps altogether,
Not any particular sensation,
Just all body sensation.
One of the powerful aspects of meditation is that our senses aren't troubled.
We don't have a to-do list.
Our senses themselves aren't trying to make the world different.
And so by soaking into these experiences at this point,
Just body sensation,
The self might have all kinds of worries and concerns,
But notice that the body sensations themselves,
They don't have these same stories.
Often mindfulness can feel like a fight between the stories and the sensations.
That's fine.
That's natural.
It's returning to the sensations over and over.
Or perhaps we can notice that our worries,
Our concerns,
Our anxieties,
That these are just built out of sensations too.
Perhaps there's an emotional experience of anxiousness,
Nervousness,
Even sadness,
And noticing that as a sensation in the body with a particular location,
Particular intensity level,
Not fighting that.
Fighting the present moment is how we often experience a lot of suffering.
So even if it's uncomfortable,
Simply accepting at this moment,
That's just how it is.
Noticing that often our concerns or anxieties come in the form of mental audio,
The mind,
Blah,
Blah,
Blah-ing,
Talking,
Speaking as though it were our own voice.
And perhaps our concerns or the things that challenge us,
That wake us up in the middle of the night,
Perhaps these are built out of mental images or a sense of space confined around us or some sense of a location that we should be doing something.
These are all mental visual activities.
So taking a look around your sensing experience now,
Whatever is arising,
Maybe it's pleasant or unpleasant or likely quite a bit of neutrality in different places,
And notice that all we can experience is simply built out of sensing,
Body sensations or body emotions,
Sounds in our environment or sounds in our mind,
Visual experiences.
If the eyes are closed,
It's the visual experience of darkness.
If the eyes are opened,
It's the visual experience of human seeing.
This process may be a bit easier if the eyes are closed,
But it's fine if not,
Simply letting the eyes rest on a single point.
So we either have external seeing or internal seeing,
Mental images,
A sense of space,
A sense of where things are occurring.
Notice that none of these senses themselves have a place to be.
They're not trying to get somewhere.
The experience of hearing,
For instance,
Doesn't feel anxious that it's been cooped up inside.
The sensations in our left hand aren't concerned about what happens tomorrow.
So here lies the dramatic irony.
Our entire experience of reality is based out of pieces,
Sense data that doesn't have our problems.
And yet it seems so convincing that we have our problems.
Luckily,
If we look closely,
Even our problems are simply built out of this neutral sense data.
Now we're going to make a slight transition.
We're going to do a little nurture positive practice.
This is simply using a phrase to support ourselves moving towards some kind of ideal or better way of relating.
So what I'd like us to do is pick a phrase that we might say to ourselves that would be comforting.
It's important that the various parts of our self know that we'll be there.
We're not going anywhere.
We'll take care of ourselves.
So I'd like you to direct this phrase towards yourself.
I'm right here.
I'm not going anywhere.
I'll take care of you.
I'm right here.
I'm not going anywhere.
I'll take care of you.
Notice what happens when you direct this phrase at yourself a few times.
Or using whatever phrase feels right for you.
Often it can be pleasant.
Quite often it can be the opposite.
There can be mild or even major pushback.
Some part of us can push back and say,
This is stupid.
Or just be distracted.
What's that other thing I needed to do?
Or I don't like this.
Some other form of distraction pushing against the practice.
That's fine.
That's actually something we're looking for.
This simply indicates that there's some part of us that doesn't feel like its needs are being met by this phrase.
Excellent.
We've found a part of ourselves that feels like it's not listened to.
So for a few moments,
Finding the phrase that would be soothing,
That would be helpful to that part of ourselves that's pushing back.
Recognizing that that part is natural.
Of course some part of us pushes back at other parts.
Using our intuition to figure out what words would help soothe this particular part of ourselves.
Using any phrase you want.
And so I'm going to encourage us to stay in stillness to continue with this practice.
And we'll end the formal practice when the bell goes silent.
Notice that even hearing these words can fill the body with preparation,
Energy,
Sense of wanting to jump out of the practice.
So just be aware of that.
Notice that the body and mind start creating images,
Body sensations,
Jumping to some imagined future.
This moment when the bell is silent.
Like so many of our unconscious desires,
They fail to see that often what we're looking for is here right now.
At this particular moment,
The bell is silent.
And we have this particular moment to enjoy.
And if we can't learn to enjoy this precise moment,
It's likely that that future moment won't feel very good when we get there.
So again,
Staying with the practice,
Staying in stillness,
Allowing a tiny bit of light to enter the eyes.
If they're closed and eventually allowing the eyes to rest on a single point,
Ideally not a screen or not text,
Resting on this point,
Reattuning with the practice,
The sensing experience,
Our kind phrase,
Perhaps the part of us that potentially pushed back against the phrase.
And recognize that this moment here with our eyes open,
This is the great teacher.
This is what will show us how to bring this practice into every aspect of our lives.
Here we are half in meditation,
Half out.
This is the brackish water that we learn to live in over time.
