Forsaking Yourself: A Journey Back To True Self-Alignment

Are you forsaking yourself? Forsaking yourself is a deep betrayal of your true self. It happens in both small and significant ways. From suppressing your true feelings to living a life that others expect of you, this betrayal leads to a misaligned existence. In this talk we dealt deeply into how forsaking ourselves is one of the most detrimental things you can do to your spiritual awakening. I also give you five questions and contemplations to help you to begin to dismantle how you might be forsaking yourself.

Transcript

Forsaking Yourself,

A Journey Back to True Self-Alignment by Max Ryan Are you forsaking yourself?

The reason I want to bring this up today is that it comes up over and over with the people that I work with and that I help.

When I sit down with somebody privately,

We begin to speak,

Inevitably there comes a point when there is a realization that the reason that they are suffering or not satisfied or just even slightly depressed is some form of forsaking themselves.

Most of the time,

They're not even aware that this is what they're doing because it is so ingrained in themselves to be in denial of what they truly want and what they truly are.

They'll make excuses and go deep into how the person thinks that life is somehow based on suffering,

Even if they don't know that that's exactly what they are believing.

When this is discovered and addressed,

Life begins to radically change for many of these people.

Life can become much more of an adventure rather than a slog.

It is definitely not a panacea for everything,

But it is definitely one of the biggest components to living a meaningful and purposeful life.

Forsaking yourself centers mainly around allowing external factors to dictate your life.

It's about putting others' needs,

Desires,

And expectations before your own.

This often leads to a life that is very misaligned with your true self.

So we all have a character that we present to the world,

Right?

Well,

This character is a fiction.

It's filled with expectations,

Shoulds,

Shouldn'ts,

And societal pressures.

Many times,

These expectations have nothing to do with the character's true alignment.

For instance,

You might have grown up in a family where becoming a lawyer was the norm.

Despite your inner desire to be a dancer,

You may have followed the path laid out for you,

Forsaking your true passion.

This is a blatant example,

But forsaking oneself often happens in subtler and more mischievous everyday ways.

In our daily lives,

The character often forsakes itself due to societal and familial pressures,

Financial needs,

Or simply the desire to fit in.

This misalignment can manifest in not saying what you truly mean,

Doing things you don't want to do,

And suppressing your authentic self and your feelings.

One way to identify if you're forsaking yourself is by examining what you are tolerating.

When you consistently do things you don't want to do or say things that you don't really mean,

You betray your true self.

This deep betrayal leads to a life of suffering.

Forsaking yourself is a deep betrayal of your true self.

It happens in both small and significant ways,

From suppressing your true feelings to living a life that others expect of you.

This betrayal leads to a misaligned existence.

Take something like meditation,

For instance.

I've seen this so many times in the spiritual world.

Many people adopt meditation because they believe it's the path to spirituality.

Over and over,

Wherever you look in this world,

It's something that seems to be the prerequisite to true spiritual awakening.

However,

If meditation doesn't resonate with you,

Forcing yourself to do it because of societal or guru-imposed expectations is a form of self-betrayal.

Of course,

There is nothing wrong with meditation,

And there is nothing right with meditation.

Helpful for some,

It creates a lot of anxiety and suffering for others.

True freedom doesn't come from following prescribed paths,

But aligning with what truly resonates with you.

Life can be whatever you make it.

Your experience can be whatever you want it to be.

However,

The more you forsake yourself,

The more you suffer.

True alignment comes from recognizing and honoring your authentic self.

Of course,

Developing this skill will take some time if you're not used to it.

It's something that is not in general supported by society.

For that reason,

It's important to begin to practice being truthful to ourselves and knowing when we're not being truthful with ourselves.

Awareness is the first step to the journey back to true self-alignment.

You must recognize where you're betraying yourself before you can change it.

This awareness starts the process of freeing yourself from self-imposed constraints.

Developing a style of communication that honors your truth without making others wrong is essential.

Most people struggle with tough conversations because they fear rejection or conflict.

However,

Expressing your truth is crucial for self-alignment.

Once again,

This definitely takes practice and it can take time.

When I'm working with people,

Sometimes they even ask me for specific words to say to someone so that they can express their truth and not betray themselves anymore.

I gladly do this at the beginning,

But eventually they have to be able to put it into their own words so that it can be a unique and personal expression of their deepest self.

Think of self-expression like a pressure cooker.

A pressure cooker releases steam,

Gradually,

To prevent what?

An explosion.

Similarly,

You must find ways to express your truth,

Gradually,

To avoid emotional outbursts or internal turmoil.

This practice prevents the buildup of repressed emotions.

Suppressing emotions,

Especially anger,

Can be very dangerous.

It leads to intense internal conflict and can manifest in very unhealthy ways.

Learning to express your emotions healthily is vital for maintaining alignment with your true self.

Now,

Forsaking oneself is often a deeply ingrained pattern.

It takes conscious effort to challenge and to change these patterns.

As I said,

Progress may be slow,

But every step towards honoring your true self is a step toward a more aligned and fulfilled life.

The truth is,

You only have so much time here in this form.

Who knows if there's even a form after this?

That's up for much debate,

Of course.

I want to be very clear with you that life,

As we know it,

Is too short to live misaligned.

Life is here for the taking,

For you,

And the more that you're forsaking yourself,

Either consciously or unconsciously,

You're squandering this beautiful gift.

The point here is to embrace your true self,

Honor your authentic desires,

And let go of societal and familial expectations that do not serve you.

By doing so,

You pave the way for a life of true fulfillment,

Joy,

And ultimate freedom.

Take a deep breath and reflect.

Where are you betraying yourself?

Where are you forsaking your true self?

Recognize these areas and start to journey back to your true self-alignment.

Remember,

Your true self deserves to be honored and expressed.

A life that is the opposite is a life that is truly not worth living.

In fact,

It's a waste of this precious opportunity of self-expression and creativity while you're here in this dream state.

Now,

As you might know,

I'm a huge proponent of asking the right questions.

So I want to encourage deeper introspection and foster a more profound understanding of how forsaking oneself can impact your life and your well-being.

So please take the time to consider or even write out your thoughts about the following five ideas.

I guarantee you that it will enlighten you and begin your path of letting go of forsaking yourself and living in more alignment.

Number one,

What specific ways have you noticed yourself forsaking your true desires and passions to meet the expectations of others?

Reflect on a moment when you chose a path that wasn't aligned with your authentic self.

How did that decision impact your sense of fulfillment and happiness?

Number two,

Consider a recent situation where you felt compelled to say or do something that didn't resonate with your feelings.

What prevented you from expressing your authentic self in that moment?

How might you approach similar situations in the future to honor your true self?

Number three,

What societal or familial pressures have influenced most of your life choices?

Identify one significant decision in your life that was driven by these external pressures rather than your own inner desires.

How might your life be different if you had followed your true inclinations instead of those?

Number four,

I want you to reflect on the concept of deep betrayal of self.

Can you identify an instance where you felt this deep betrayal?

What emotions arose from that experience and how did it affect your overall well-being?

What steps can you take to avoid such self-betrayal in the future?

Number five,

How do you currently handle and express emotions like anger or frustration?

Think about a time when suppressing these emotions led to negative consequences.

What strategies can you adopt to ensure healthy expressions of your emotions while maintaining alignment with your true self?

Reviews

The delivery is moving—one of the most compelling I’ve heard. It’s powerful, clear, and emotionally resonant. I’ll be listening to it again, because parts of it hit hard and seem worth returning to. The exercise is helpful too, though I would’ve just preferred a short recap of the core insights at the end—it might have deepened the impact

🙏🕊️

New perspectives. Thought provoking.

Thank you so much for sharing this beneficial talk also for providing some helpful questions for me to reflect on 🙏🏼💙🤍🩵 appreciate 💙🤍🩵🙏🏼

Thx for offering this, Max. I found your perspectives intriguing. I will consider using the questions, you posed, to help me inquire more deeply within myself.

Really good questions to ask myself...