Sacred Union: What Is Sacred Union For Us?

Season 1 - Episode 1: Friends and strangers keep asking us, "What is that magic between the two of you?" We usually answer, "We don't know. It's just natural." A couple since almost eleven and married for more than five years, my beloved Marie and I are exploring what we experience together as "Sacred Union". We are interviewing each other on the quest to better understand and explain the magic we and others feel between us.

Transcript

Hello and welcome to this series about Sacred Union My name is Martin Richtsfeld and today my wife Marie Richtsfeld and I we are going to interview each other about what we experience together as Sacred Union To give a little bit of a background,

We are celebrating our 11th anniversary soon and we are married for more than 5 years and we still love hugging each other,

Kissing each other,

Cuddling,

We still love lovemaking and we feel this really deep connection,

This deep bond between each other and that's what we are going to share in this series about Sacred Union and today,

In this first episode,

We are going to talk about what Sacred Union is for us So,

I'm going to ask you,

What's Sacred Union for you?

Thank you for this beautiful introduction So,

To me,

Sacred Union is part of three different stages that we can experience in a relationship and I will quickly go through them to get to what is Sacred Union So,

The first stage is when a person is still looking for him or herself and is on a self-discovery journey and is open to heal wounds and trauma maybe not as conscious as it could be in the next stage but this person is already eager to improve and to dig deep into who he or she is and then in the second stage is to me when the person is already really working on him or herself and is very much questioning and finding the answers of how can I,

As an individual being be in sovereign wholeness how do I marry the inner masculine and the feminine energies inside of me so I'm able to also experience this balance inside of me so therefore I'm able also to attract a partner that is also balanced in him or herself So,

In the second stage we are very much already connected to our path and who we are which leads me to the third stage which is Sacred Union which is actually a state of consciousness of having two individual sovereign beings that have a feeling of who they are and then coming together in a third entity that arises which is the relationship or which is in this case the Sacred Union and in the Sacred Union state which is more like a state because sometimes we can drop back into the first or into the second stage so in this stage it's a very,

I feel like a stage of being in harmony with yourself and therefore with the partner and it's a very spiritual place of what does it really feel like to be alive we can be as a couple and that's what I feel is it's not that we have it all the time like that we are in this third stage but it happens to us on quite a regular basis which is very,

Very beautiful so my question to you now is first,

Do you agree with what I said?

And second is what does help you to be in this third stage of Sacred Union?

Regarding the first question,

If I agree I would say it's not necessary,

I guess,

For me to agree but because it's your perception,

It's how you feel it and it's a beautiful way to describe it and I think it also brings me to the point in a relationship that we experience things differently and I experience very much what you said so I can feel I can agree to a lot of what you said but still since I'm another human being I might experience it differently and I think what's the most important kind of underneath is when we feel each other in different situations we feel this oneness and no matter how you describe it and no matter how I describe it we just can feel it,

This Sacred Union is I guess beyond words,

Right?

So I just wanted to bring that aspect in as well and the second question,

Well maybe what I have to add to the first one because you asked it for the Sacred Union I feel a Sacred Union is not necessarily only between two people no matter what their sexual preference is or it can be in a business relation but also with my environment,

With an instrument for example and I'm pretty sure the musicians when they play their most favorite guitar for example then they feel a Sacred Union with that instrument they feel as if they are one and also a little side note here maybe we started to rename the lovemaking we started with like yeah we have sex then we moved on to no we are connecting,

We are in connection and then the third stage it felt like we are tapping into oneness so I think this oneness that the musician has with his instrument that we feel on a regular bass that's kind of this Sacred Union that can be felt with a lot of different things and it's hard to describe so that's the aspect I want to bring in it's just can you connect with whatever you connect at the moment a hundred percent can you dedicate,

Can you drop in to what you're doing a hundred percent can you be in the now and when you can be that with your partner you are entering this Sacred Union that's beautiful and yeah there's a lot more to say but there will be more episodes and for your question how to stay in the third stage as you already mentioned it's like the dropping in and out that happens and it's like the same as with I guess this misconception around enlightenment or samadhi or however you want to call it we are not always in that state and when you have the eight limbs of yoga the first seven you can kind of prepare for that samadhi for that enlightenment but it will happen at some point it's nothing that can be forced kind of so I guess it's the same for us we prepare everything and we have for example we have a couple day where we just spend time together or we go out we have dinner we prepare for an evening together so we kind of set the environment for us and then eventually hopefully we can drop into this beautiful space where we are just one and where there's nothing else but what we're doing now this now this oneness and yeah you also mentioned the like working on our own stuff first and it's also like these stages are not and you mentioned that already they're not like stage one two and three and that's it but they're kind of yeah sometimes we drop back into stage one and then we go into stage two and stage three and everyone has like a bad day and then we need to walk on something or we get triggered by something and then we need to walk through that in order to kind of be able to get back to stage three so yeah the inner work having modalities having and talking about modalities it can be whatever it is for you it can be running it can be yoga it can be meditation it can be Qigong Tai Chi cooking whatever you want to do and these modalities that like really allow you to drop in with yourself and get to know yourself better or myself better this really helps me and yeah prepares the space to be able to drop into stage three as well not out of a need I need to I need lovemaking now no it's just this container perfectly is created now so we can perfectly drop into and release yeah did that answer your question?

Yes thank you you're welcome if you can name one experience or one one thing that like really opened the sacred union for you like this space of sacred union what was that was it over time or was it a certain experience or how did you start experiencing sacred union?

Thank you as you know as Martin knows I was 14 when I have seen him the very first time and he's eight years older than me so he was 22 and when I've seen him the first time and maybe we'll share that story in a different episode I instantly felt such a deep connection to this man and I didn't know why and who that is and what is going on inside of me I just felt like this inner knowing that we belong together and that's like 15 years ago or 16 so I wouldn't say that this was already part of sacred union as we just described it because I was still very young and not really aware of what I want to do and what I still need to work on I mean we are we always need to work on ourselves constantly as human beings but I was still rather unconscious so to answer your question if there was a specific event or if it was more a continuous journey and I think it's both like when we started traveling and leaving when we left Austria which is about five years ago we left everything behind and it was important to us to support each other to stick together in a way because we went into countries where we have never been before where we didn't know the culture where we didn't know the language neither the habits or any traditions so it was sometimes really challenging to get settled in a different culture that is so far away from Austria and so definitely all this experience we have made while traveling brought me even closer to you and built a lot of even more trust in you and in our relationship but certainly there are also some,

You're smiling,

Some events that were just that was during our connection or oneness and you mentioned that enlightenment is it's not a constant state and that's yeah definitely true from my perspective but I had these experiences with you during lovemaking that brought me really really close to I don't know if it was a moment of enlightenment or if it was just a moment of being so,

Feeling so loved and feeling so,

Loving myself so much that I can surrender so much to you and just really completely release everything and be 100% present with you so this self-love anchored me and got reflected by you in this beautiful lovemaking process how I was using it,

Experience and yeah these beautiful strengthening experiences made me love you even more I love you so much that I can't put it into any words but every time such a connection happens I feel like my heart is so full of love like can there even be more?

Yeah so I guess it's a combination thank you for sharing,

Thank you for sharing so openly thank you my question to you is what does bring you into the present moment the most to experience this sacred union what we just talked about hmm good question thank you it's definitely different things and yeah I guess what we lost as a culture as a society is these faces we are going through faces of the day,

Faces of the week,

Of the month,

Of the moon cycle,

Of the year,

Of the seasons during the year so we kind of got disconnected to most of that and just to give an example when the sun was rising we got up and when the sun went down we went to sleep that's how we lived for tens of thousands of years and now we have all this artificial light and so we are kind of even on a day we are out of the natural cycle we actually belong to as being part of nature and we don't forget very often that we are part of nature so with that said what's the reason why I'm sharing this is I also feel this cycle of connection between us in a way and I'm pretty sure it's very much connected to your moon cycle that during your ovulation phase which is I'm more attracted to you which is natural because it's evolutionary necessary kind of life wants to create more life and yeah there also when it's like a rainy cuddly weather so when the outside world is giving us or the nature is giving us a day off in a way to go into our cave and cuddle and make love so there are different factors from I would say from I don't want to say from the outside even though like the cycle we feel it or it might we might see it as an outside factor but it's actually an internal factor since we are part of nature we are part of that cycle whatever we feel during that cycle is also part of us so it's not something outside influencing us but it's coming from within us and so there are these cycles where we need time for ourselves and where we do our own thing and there are these cycles where we really like are into each other and we wake up we even what happens sometimes is we wake up during the night kissing and when we wake up we're already kissing so our body kind of wants to connect unconsciously like for us unconsciously it already wants to connect which is a beautiful feeling and it happens every now and then and yeah so during these cycles there are different stages where it's sometimes easier sometimes harder to get into that state and then we have like this real external influences maybe business or work or friends or family or like when our head is buzzing with different stuff it's a lot harder to drop into that space and that's why especially nowadays it becomes more and more and more important for me to set boundaries and to turn off the phone and to close the computer and to not answer anything any messages and to just be for ourselves and the world will still live tomorrow yeah so these boundaries I feel are super super important and I think I once read a statistics or something that it's actually quite a high number that in bed and even during lovemaking a partner takes a phone because it rings or something yeah I read a statistic about it somewhere I cannot imagine that a second please phone rings so no definitely having boundaries and also having a space where for example a space for the morning practice and it can even be in the same room but it's like and it can be just an energetic space of okay here is now the space I do where I do my morning routine and then we have a space to be together we have a space to eat together we also enjoy eating together a lot and even though we don't talk to be present with the food yes it can be different circumstances modalities cycles that help to get into that space and yeah so it's hard to put into short words but I hope that answered your question yes thank you yeah any last words anything we want to spread we want to say one thing that comes to my mind is that when we fall in love we can be blinded by love and forget the outside world we need to be very much focused on the partner which can stay for up to two years to be like in this state of feeling how do you say like feeling the butterflies yes the butterflies and then I heard everything that is beyond those two years is like that's really true love like if you manage to work on yourself so much that you can love yourself so much and then also let a partner into your life that's really deep love and the first often the first two years are just flushed with hormones and they are altering our perception so yes a relationship is is work and a relationship needs pure dedication to to really love and to love oneself and then being able to love one another and to really establish this like this third entity which is the sacred union so it's like I am myself you are your third and then we have a third kind of energy or person or entity that is sacred union and I believe that everybody everybody in this world can have such a dedicated relationship but it doesn't happen by its own it's yeah it needs dedication yeah anything you want to add yes when you started you said when we fall in love and I once heard the quote when everything that falls at some point like hits the ground and then it breaks so I think it's beautiful that you said that because the first two years I feel or whatever the time frame exactly is they might be like falling in love and I think the the art of bringing the sacred union in is then rising together in love so it's like taking this this falling so it doesn't hit the ground but it it it uplifts into a rising so we rise together in love yeah let's rise together in love that's a good wrap up yeah thank you for listening thank you for being open to yeah exploring more about sacred union and we see each other as as inspiration just to open up and find your own way to sacred union and maybe get a hint here or there in directions that might be interesting and if you are specifically interested in something please let us know in the comments in the reviews and so on we are more than happy to go into specific topics that our listeners want to hear more about yeah with that said much love much much love and hugs and kisses and thank you for listening see you in the next hear you in the next episode sending much love and hear you soon bye