Hello friends,
This is Marian.
In today's practice we're going to experiment with the tool of self-compassion.
Self-compassion supports resilience and emotional well-being.
This meditation is inspired by the work of Penna Chodron,
The American Buddhist nun and author.
In her book,
The Places That Scare You,
She says this about compassion.
Compassion is not the relationship between the healer and the wounded.
It is the relationship between equals.
Only when we know our own darkness well,
Can we be present with the darkness of others.
Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity.
As with any meditation practice,
If at any time this feels unsafe,
Please stop and get the support you need.
Now take your time and position your body such that you are sitting with a posture of dignity and poise and also of comfort.
I invite you to begin today's self-compassion journey with your body.
How might you be kind to your body right now?
And when you're ready,
Breathing in through the nose,
Take in a nice and deep energizing breath and see if you can feel this all the way down into your belly.
Now hold gently and now release through the mouth.
Another deep breath in,
Feel your spine extending,
Pause and a slow release out,
Belly goes back to the spine.
One more deep breath in,
Perhaps you can feel the entire length of your body.
Hold and now let go.
Release anything you're holding on to,
See if you can let this go.
Allow your breath to return to normal.
Breathing in,
Feel the sturdiness of the spine.
Breathing out,
Allow the chest to open,
To soften.
Following the natural flow and rhythm of the breath.
Just breathe.
And now bring your attention to the crown of your head.
Just see if you notice any sensation here.
And then down to the forehead,
See if you can loosen up,
Smoothen this area out,
Releasing any wrinkle or worry lines that might be there.
Now down to the eyes,
Soften the eyes,
Relax the jaw,
Loosen the shoulders.
Now draw your attention to your back,
Top of your back,
Middle of your back,
Bottom of your back.
Just breathing into the back,
Again noticing the sturdiness of the spine.
And now around to the front,
Opening the chest,
Down into the belly,
Noticing the belly breathing.
Feel the weight of the seat,
The thighs,
The knees,
The shins,
The calves,
The ankles,
The tops of the feet,
The bottoms of the feet,
And all the way down into the toes.
Simply being here in the body.
And perhaps you can feel the entire body breathing.
And from here we shift to the next phase of our practice,
Experimenting with the three elements of self-compassion.
The ABCs of self-compassion,
Acceptance,
Being human,
And connecting.
And as we go through this,
If you need more time,
Simply pause and then resume when you're ready.
Acceptance,
This refers to leaning into whatever is here.
Sometimes we turn to meditation because we want to feel better.
It feels counterintuitive to sit with emotions that are painful or exhausting.
Practicing mindfulness and self-compassion,
We learn not to turn away from the emotions.
We learn to sit with them,
Side by side.
So pause here and see if you can identify what emotion or emotions you're experiencing right here,
Right now.
And now see if perhaps you can locate the emotions as sensations in your body.
Perhaps you're feeling good today and you might notice a lightness in the chest or a feeling of spaciousness or looseness.
Maybe you're not feeling great.
You might notice a heaviness in the heart,
Clammy palms,
An ache in the belly,
Or tension,
Knots or tightness.
Perhaps you don't feel anything at all.
Or maybe your body feels numb.
Numbness is also a sensation.
Pause here and just notice what is here.
Chodron teaches us that the practice is not about getting rid of anything.
It is about letting things be.
With love.
So whatever you're experiencing,
See if you can be a friend to this,
Side by side.
Feel your breath flowing in and out,
Washing through your body like a tide of kindness.
And affirm to yourself,
May I be kind to myself in this moment.
May I allow what is here without judgment.
May I trust the healing power of compassion.
This is element one.
Accepting what is here,
Regardless of what it is.
The second element is about being human.
About being imperfect.
As I mentioned earlier,
Chodron explains that compassion is a relationship between each other.
When we practice self-compassion,
We recognize our own self-worth and meet ourselves as equals.
Often negative emotions arise from feeling that we have fallen short of expectations.
Feelings such as shame,
Embarrassment,
Disappointment,
Regret.
These are all natural human experiences.
As you sit with whatever emotion is present,
You might place a hand over your heart.
And allow yourself to acknowledge your imperfections.
And to see them not as flaws,
But as part of what makes you human.
Beautifully imperfect.
If you are held to very high expectations early in life,
It can be especially difficult to let go of self-criticism.
When a child is learning to walk,
We don't judge them for falling.
We gently encourage them to stand and to try again.
Can you offer yourself the same patience and kindness?
And affirm to yourself,
I give myself permission to be human and imperfect.
I am doing the best I can with what I have.
I deserve the same compassion I give others.
And now the third element.
Connecting.
Imagine if you can,
All around the world,
People just like you and me,
All dealing with their own challenges.
People moving in and out of relationships.
Dealing with loss and loneliness and grief.
With thoughts of inadequacies.
With fear for themselves and their loved ones.
Try to see these people.
Imagine all the different faces.
All the different places.
And see if you can,
Try to make some connection here.
Now draw your attention to your spine.
The strength and sturdiness of your spine.
And with your attention here,
Breathe in self-compassion.
And as you breathe out,
Soften the chest,
Open the front.
Breathe out love and compassion for others.
Breathe in self-compassion.
Notice the shoulders rise.
Breathe out compassion and love for others.
Breathe in love and compassion for yourself.
Breathe out love and compassion for others.
See the faces.
All the different places.
Sending love and compassion.
Breathing in love and compassion.
Breathing out love and compassion.
Feel this move through your body.
Feel the tide of kindness.
As the breath moves through your body.
The ABCs of self-compassion.
Accepting what is in this moment.
Being human.
Being okay with our flaws and imperfections.
And connecting.
Appreciating that others are also suffering.
Sending them love.
As we close,
Notice your posture.
Now pull up your shoulders and straighten your spine.
And open your chest.
And allow yourself to accept how lovely you are.
Just as you are.
Now take in a deep breath.
Pulling in the energy from the vibrant space around you.
Pull in that energy.
And pause.
And smile.
And then a slow release out.
One more deep breath in.
Pulling in all that energy.
Pause.
And now let it go.
And affirm to yourself.
May I meet myself with love.
May I live with an open heart.
May compassion guide my every breath.
Thank you for your practice.
Be well.
