Treating Yourself With Kindness

A short self-compassion practice which includes an invitation for some self-massage. Take a moment to turn some kindness towards yourself as if plating seeds that, over time and with your loving and tender attention, will grow.

Transcript

Hi it's Mandy here.

Welcome to a self-compassion practice with some self-massage thrown in as well.

So just taking your time to begin by choosing a posture that's going to support you to feel comfortable and at ease,

However that looks for your body,

Whether it's sitting or lying or standing.

Maybe closing down the eyes if that feels comfortable for you or just having a soft gaze.

And no matter the position that you've chosen,

Just checking out the points of contact between your body and the surface that's supporting you.

Checking in with areas of the body that might feel ease,

That might feel discomfort.

Checking out areas that are pleasant or unpleasant and just making any adjustments in the service of finding a bit more ease if it's possible for you.

Then becoming aware of your breath,

Perhaps taking a few fuller breaths and just with each exhale allowing the breath to support a feeling of softening or settling.

You might even want to sigh on the out-breath,

Just letting go,

Remembering that there's no right or wrong way to breathe.

For this practice the intention is to try to cultivate feelings of kindness towards yourself.

You may like to imagine it's a bit like planting seeds,

Seeds of kindness,

Friendliness,

Tenderness,

Warmth and care.

Some parts of the practice may really resonate with you,

Other parts may not.

Sometimes you might feel strongly towards the invitations and other times not.

So just noticing that and as best you can bringing this open-hearted curiosity to the practice,

Remembering that each of the invitations are just that,

An opportunity for you to explore in whatever way feels okay for you.

It's kind of like we're tending to a garden,

Planting these seeds of self-compassion,

Not trying to force them on ourselves or change anything that's already here,

But perhaps softly over time these feelings of self-compassion towards ourselves will grow.

At any time throughout this practice if you feel the need to return to allow your attention to settle on the movements and sensations of breathing or to connect with sensations in the body,

Please feel welcome to do so.

Then just rest there for a few moments until you're ready to return to the rest of the practice.

Seeing if it's possible to make space for all the thoughts,

Emotions,

Sensations,

Impulses that might bubble up throughout this practice,

Making space and allowing things to be just as they are.

So to begin with,

Gathering your awareness now to the process of breathing.

Becoming aware of the full duration of the inhale and the full duration of the exhale.

Noticing the wave-like motion of the breath,

The rising and the falling,

And perhaps noticing the tenderness that breath has to offer with each breath.

The rising and the falling,

The softening,

The easing,

Just breathing,

Just this breath.

If it's possible,

Maybe opening to a sense of kindness.

Breathing in kindness,

Breathing out kindness.

When you're ready you might be able to turn some of that towards yourself,

Some of that kindness.

Offering yourself a sense of friendliness,

Warmth,

Tenderness with each breath.

You might like to offer yourself a gesture of kindness,

Whether that's a hand resting on the heart or another part of the body.

Maybe gently stroking your arm or your leg,

Or choosing to be still,

Making that choice with kindness.

Just acknowledging yourself just as you are in this moment.

Breathing with these senses of kindness as best you can.

So in a moment I'm going to invite you to see if it's possible to explore offering yourself kindness through some supportive touch.

Remembering that this is just an invitation,

Something you might like to try out or not,

We're going to explore offering ourself a little bit of self massage.

So if you're up for trying this,

Maybe just taking your right hand and placing it on the back of the left hand side of your spine,

Up towards the top of your neck,

Just where the base of your head meets your neck.

With your fingers touching the center of your spine and then just pulling these fingers towards the outside of the neck.

And as you do so,

You might feel a light bit of squeezing through the skin,

Massaging the muscles here.

And then perhaps moving the hand towards the shoulders,

Squeezing and rubbing the muscles here.

It can be an area of the body that we hold a lot of tension and tightness,

Just seeing if it's possible to offer this area of the body a little bit of kindness through your supportive touch.

Perhaps moving your hands now down through the top of the shoulder towards the upper arm,

Continuing to squeeze the skin and the muscles,

Just whatever feels right for you.

Moving the hand,

Continuing down through the elbow,

The lower part of the arm,

Down towards the wrist.

Just using the fingers and the hand in whatever way feels right for you to massage this part of the body.

Then as you get to the hand,

You might like to use your thumb and fingers to put a bit of rubbing motion through the palm,

Through each finger.

And then maybe just finishing off by shaking that hand and then coming into a bit of stillness.

And just noticing the sensations that are here,

In the arm that has been massaged.

Perhaps comparing it to the other side,

If there's any warmth or whether there's feelings of it being more alive,

More awake.

Just making space for whatever's arising for you now in this moment.

And if you're up for it and you're ready,

You might like to repeat that on the other side.

So taking your left hand to the back of the right hand side of your neck and just gently squeezing with the fingers,

Pulling and rubbing the skin here,

Massaging through the muscles.

Coming around to the top of the shoulder,

Just exploring using your fingers and your hand to gently rub and squeeze this part of the body.

Down through the upper arm,

Squeezing the biceps and the triceps.

Down through the elbow,

Through the lower arm,

Down to the wrist and then gently massaging through the hand,

Through the palm,

Through each finger,

Just in whatever way feels right for you.

And perhaps shaking out that right hand and coming back into some stillness.

And just returning your attention to the breath once more,

Using the breath to soften and open to this experience.

Noticing how it feels to have offered yourself that kind touch.

Maybe taking a moment here to wish yourself further kindness.

Maybe wishing that you have the patience,

Courage and strength to meet each moment just as it is and just as you are.

Wishing that you can find peace and ease in your body,

Heart and mind.

It's very easy for us to be harsh with ourselves in the way we think,

The way we behave,

But offering ourselves kindness in this way,

It's as if we're showing the same compassion that we would to a loved one.

And it is possible that over time you may find with cultivating these seeds of self-compassion,

With the intention of turning some kindness towards yourself,

That this practice becomes a little bit easier.

In the final few moments of this practice,

Just continuing to breathe with kindness towards yourself.

Noticing feelings of tenderness,

Warmth,

Compassion and just breathing with these feelings.

And taking the final moments to offer yourself a little bit of appreciation for opening your heart in this way.

Opening your heart,

You're giving tender heart,

Opening it towards yourself in this way.

Thanks,

See you next time.