Feeding The Light

We have been exploring the light within the darkness as it relates to our lives and what is still hidden or shadowed within ourselves.
There’s a story from the time of the Buddha that when he was getting close to death, he gave the teaching to: “Be a light unto yourself.” Make yourself a light.

When we come to spiritual practice the idea is not to see the light as something outside ourselves. The light is actually already within and we are opening to it, being permeated by it, to be the light.

Transcript

We have been exploring the light within the darkness this week as it relates to our life and kind of what is still hidden or shadowed within ourselves and Saturday is the winter solstice,

The shortest day of the year,

Kind of known as the heart of darkness and for some people the darkness of winter is difficult but the light is coming back,

It's returning,

So I'd like to explore that a little bit.

There's a story from the time of the Buddha when he was getting close to death and he gave a teaching,

One of his final teachings,

To the people gathered in the village and then his monastic community.

He basically said be a light unto yourself,

Make yourself a light,

Make yourself a light and when we come to spiritual practice the idea is not to see the light as something outside of ourselves but it's the light that's already within us and we're just opening to it,

We're allowing for it to permeate us more fully,

To be the light,

Be a light unto yourself.

I want to share one of the oldest stories that comes out of India and it's about this being the light.

Some of you have heard it,

I've shared it here before but it's always good to hear a story again because when we listen to a story sometimes we hear it with new eyes or new ears really.

So once upon a time there was a village in India and in the village lived a successful merchant and in his role of the community he was quite successful and so he became a member of the temple and he raised his family and as he got older he began to think about,

As you know older people do,

What's going to happen in the other world,

The world that we're heading back to.

So he decided as insurance to give a lot of money to the temple and he made a big public display of it.

He said he was going to give all his gold and all his cattle,

Everything that he owned to the temple.

Now his son who was witnessing this,

A young man by the name of Nachiketa and he was looking on and this didn't feel quite right to him.

He kind of saw the hypocrisy of it and he thought his father was doing this for kind of spiritual insurance purposes.

So we know something about hypocrisy.

We see it quite often,

The hypocrisy of democratic laws and yet we still have fundamentally a racist society.

You know there's incredible pain in that and because of this pain,

You know Nachiketa saw this pain and so he spoke to it but he did it publicly with the bravado of a young man and a bit of disrespect to his father and he said,

You know,

It's just a bunch of old cows you're giving away.

You just want your name,

You know,

On the big temple don't you dad kind of thing.

You know and then he said something like you're not giving all you own.

What about me,

Your son?

And he was so obnoxious about it that when his father finally looked at him he said to his son,

I give you,

I give you to death and the young man said fine.

You know he was a defiant young man as some young men are and looking for a kind of a challenge so fine give me to death and so he said you know I'll go look for it.

So Nachiketa left the village looking for death and how he did this is that he sat down in the woods for three days and he didn't move and he waited for death to come and you know as we're learning in practice everything comes when we sit down.

All of our boredom and our wanting and our not wanting and our sleepiness and our restlessness and our doubt and when we can stay with ourselves it kind of becomes an initiation into something deeper.

So he simply sat and he didn't move and finally he arrived at the kingdom of death and who he was seeking was the the Lord Yama the king of death who administered the laws of the land but he wasn't in.

He was out collecting rent if you know what I mean.

So Nachiketa was greeted by death's associates which were war petulance and famine and they asked him like what do you want and he said well I've come to see Lord Yama and they were surprised by this because usually people don't come seeking death they're actually running in the other direction.

So they told him that he would return soon and Nachiketa said that he would wait.

So finally death came after three days and death welcomed him and said because you've waited for three days for each of these three days I offer you a boon which is a blessing as a way of making up for my rudeness.

So the young man gets to ask for three wishes from death and the first boon that he asked for was forgiveness and we talked about that a little bit on Tuesday you know death sees that this is a very wise young man.

Nachiketa said let my father's heart be free of anger so that he may see me when I return as the day I was born his beautiful son and death said granted.

So this is what happens to us when we seek the light the necessity of this first step in healing the healing from the grief that we carry.

So Lord Yama granted this gift of forgiveness and asked what will be your second blessing your second boon and Nachiketa said the second boon is this to be filled with the fire of life the prana the chi the life force.

What he was asking for was to be fully opened in this body in this heart in this mind to be fully awakened in his senses and to to live from this place of what what we're seeking in practice in a way what we value the most this freedom this inner freedom from greed and hatred and delusion.

So this is the second boon to live fully in one's life and what this looks like in our meditation practice is when we become deeply concentrated when we sustain full presence sometimes people experience this incredible light there's this visual experience of light shining on them or sometimes the body is filled with light and I don't know why this happens but it does and there is a sense of not being separate from anything duality diminishes.

So Lord Yama grants him the second boon and so the third blessing what would you like for the third blessing and Nachiketa says in mortality I would like to know the secrets beyond death I would like to know the deathless.

Well Lord Yama paused for a little bit and looked at this young man you know it's quite a big ask and he checked in and said are you sure you know there's many things I can grant you through you know magic and you know in these myths there's lots of magic happening so he evokes through magic some young maidens and offers him an endless supply and you know is that is that enough and Nachiketa kind of shakes his head and then he shows him pictures of what it is to be honored you know showing himself as a warrior a great general being admired and acknowledged by everyone in the village so great esteem and then he shows him you know images of children and grandchildren and a great big family all kinds of these different temptations that look appealing to to us and Lord Yama says well which one would you choose and Nachiketa says well I have one question for you well not all of these things that you offer me end up back in your domain and Lord Yama smiles and says well yes yes that is so and Nachiketa then says well why do you tempt me with such things that are not worth anything so I have it for a little bit of you know a little bit of time so what and then again Lord Yama says what is it that you want and Nachiketa says I want that which is deathless I want to open and awaken to that light that is unshakable and unalterable and Lord Yama senses that this young man is truly a yogi and he says to Nachiketa what you seek cannot come by possession or grasping it is not to be found somewhere else but only in the deepest vision of your heart you must meditate on your own true nature you must meditate on the ancient question who am I that is the question that will lead you to the deathless who am I Lord Yama then said that with your forgiveness and sincerity you will understand that all things arise and pass and you will come to know this this deathless so I I think this time of year this question who am I you know we're being called in some way to get closer to and remind ourselves of our light to come home to ourselves and forgive ourselves to be this light unto ourselves to ask the question who am I without all of this holding to identity to views to concepts and perhaps there'll be something there for you to see that you might not have seen before I find that the darkness of this time of year to be kind of wonderful it's a time to turn inward to come home to ourselves who am I don't know right don't know so I'll end with some parting words from Leonard Cohen he sang about this he wrote ring the bells that still can ring forget your perfect offering there is a crack a crack in everything that's how the light gets in so these are reflections for your consideration and I welcome your comments thank you

Reviews

Beautiful reflections. Thank you, Lisa

Beautiful reminders. Thank you 🙏🏼