How To Be A Good Friend

We start with a song that lets us get our wiggles out, before transitioning to a deep breathing exercise. Next, we talk about what makes a good friend and then send out lovingkindness wishes to a friend. Then we talk about things a friend doesn't do, and what you can do if a friend isn't treating you kindly. After that, we give advice for making a new friend. Then we focus on being good friends to ourselves by saying affirmations.

Transcript

Hello,

I'm Noah,

And this is Like You,

Mindfulness for Kids.

I'm so glad that you're here.

On this episode,

We're talking about friendship,

And I'm glad to have a friend like you.

So,

Listeners of all ages,

Find a place to listen where you feel comfortable and safe.

As I ask questions and invite you to say affirmations,

You're welcome to speak out loud,

Or as always,

You can just think your responses quietly in your mind.

I like to start,

As usual,

With a breathing exercise.

But sometimes it's fun to get all our wiggles out before we take a few calming breaths.

Since friendship is about having fun together,

Let's have a bit of fun with our breathing exercise.

I've got a song to help guide us through it.

You can just listen to the words and follow along with what I sing.

We'll start with some wiggling and dancing,

So feel free to get a bunch of energy out in whatever way is fun for you.

But when I say stop,

Find a comfy spot and get ready to relax and breathe deep.

Here we go.

And you stop.

Take a deep breath.

Head to toe.

Nice and slow.

That was fun,

But also very relaxing.

Friendship can be that way too.

A good friend can have lots of silly fun running around and playing games.

But they can also have a good time just sitting quietly together while reading or drawing or just hanging out.

We'll talk more about being a friend in a moment,

But first let's all be a friend to ourselves by saying,

I like me.

We'll do it on the count of three.

One,

Two,

Three.

I like me.

I like you too.

You are caring,

Thoughtful,

And reliable.

And those are some of the things that make you a great friend.

What else do you think makes a good friend?

Take a few minutes to think about that and feel free to share your thoughts out loud.

I know you have some wonderful ideas about being friends.

Here are a few things that most people agree makes a good friend.

Good friends make you feel good.

They say and do things that make you happy by showing kindness,

Giving you compliments,

Or just having fun.

Good friends support each other.

If you need a hand,

A good friend will help you out.

If you're trying something new,

They'll cheer you on.

If you're feeling sad or frustrated or hurt,

They'll check on you and help you feel better.

Good friends are trustworthy.

If you tell them a secret,

They won't spread it to other people.

And if you tell them something embarrassing,

They won't be judgmental or make fun of you for it.

Good friends listen.

They're interested in what you have to say.

They don't constantly talk over you or interrupt.

Good friends don't have to have everything in common.

Everyone is different.

They have their own unique interests and hobbies.

A good friend won't make you feel bad for liking something different.

Instead,

They'll encourage you to be yourself.

Good friends respect your boundaries.

If you tell them something makes you uncomfortable,

They'll stop.

You may have occasional arguments or disagreements,

But if you tell a friend that they've hurt your feelings,

They'll be sorry and will try not to do it again.

And lastly,

A good friendship goes both ways.

You'll both have a chance to talk,

To choose activities,

To give and receive compliments.

In a good friendship,

Everyone is making each other feel good.

Having a good friendship is a wonderful thing.

Take a moment to stop and think about someone who's a good friend to you.

Maybe it's one person.

Maybe it's a whole group of friends.

Just think about someone who makes you feel good,

Who supports you,

Who listens to you,

Who's trustworthy and who respects your boundaries.

Once you've thought of someone who is a good friend,

Let's send them a loving kindness wish.

Close your eyes and picture them in your head.

Imagine giving them a hug or a high five or maybe a secret handshake.

Now in your mind,

Say to them,

Thank you for being a friend.

Then say,

I wish for you to be healthy,

Happy and safe.

That's a great wish to make because friends celebrate the good things that happen for each of them.

Of course,

No friendship is perfect.

In any relationship,

There will be times when you disagree,

Argue or hurt each other's feelings.

But there are some things that good friends don't do.

They don't lie or mislead you.

They don't try to make you feel bad or get others to laugh at you.

They don't say mean things behind your back.

They don't pressure you to do things that you don't want to do.

If someone you know is doing these things to you,

They may be what some people call a frenemy or even a bully.

So what should you do if someone you consider a friend isn't treating you the way a good friend should?

First,

Remember that the problem isn't you.

If someone is being mean and making you feel bad,

It's not your fault.

If their behavior makes you feel bad,

They are the one who needs to change,

Not you.

But what you can do is talk to them about how their behavior makes you feel.

Calmly explain how the things they're doing have hurt or upset you.

Sometimes people can be hurtful without trying to or even realizing that they're doing it.

But if you tell them that their behavior made you feel bad,

A true friend will feel sorry and they won't do it again.

Sometimes all it takes is speaking up to tell them how you feel.

If they're a good friend,

They'll change their behavior to stop making you feel bad.

But if they blame you,

Refuse to apologize,

Or keep doing the things that hurt you,

It may be time to move on.

You can look for other friends who treat you kindly and make you feel good about yourself.

Because you deserve to have good friends.

That might bring up another question for some of you.

How do you make a new friend?

Maybe an old friend hasn't treated you well and you're looking for new friends.

Or maybe you've just moved to a new town or a new school.

What do you do if you want to make a new friend?

You could start by being a good friend yourself.

Find someone who seems like a kind person and treat them the way friends do.

Maybe you could start by complimenting their shoes or their hair or their glasses.

You could point out something that you have in common.

Or you could try asking them about their self and be a good listener.

Ask about what they like to do or maybe what their favorite podcast is.

Maybe you'll make an instant connection.

Or maybe a friendship will grow slowly over time.

One of the most important things of all is being a good friend to yourself.

Saying affirmations is one way to remind yourself what a good friend you are.

So let's say some affirmations together now.

Here's an example from one of our listeners.

Hello,

My name is Kenny.

I am from Vietnam and I'm eight years old.

Here's my favorite affirmation.

My uniqueness is what makes me special.

My uniqueness is what makes me special.

Thanks for sharing that affirmation,

Kenny.

Now let's all say a few more affirmations together.

Since this episode is all about friends,

I decided to have a couple of friends join me to say affirmations.

Long time listeners will recognize the voices of Maya and Esso from past episodes.

As always,

We'll say each affirmation twice so you can listen the first time,

Then repeat it the second time.

Here we go.

I love myself exactly as I am.

I love myself exactly as I am.

I have people who love and respect me.

I have people who love and respect me.

There is no one better to be than myself.

There is no one better to be than myself.

I like what makes me different.

I like what makes me different.

I love people who are different than me.

I love people who are different than me.

I deserve to be loved.

I deserve to be loved.

I am grateful for my friends.

I am grateful for my friends.

If you fall,

I will help you up.

If you fall,

I will help you up.

I surround myself with friends who make me feel good.

I surround myself with friends who make me feel good.

I woke up today ready to love.

I woke up today ready to love.

I deserve to be treated with kindness.

I deserve to be treated with kindness.

I am beautiful inside and out.

I am beautiful inside and out.

The world needs someone like me.

The world needs someone like me.

I am a good friend.

I am a good friend.

Now,

Let's take a few slow,

Deep breaths as we wind down our time together.

If any of those affirmations stood out to you,

Feel free to write them down or just store them safely in your mind to say when you need it.

I can't wait to spend some time together again soon.

Until next time,

I like you,

I'm proud of you,

And I'm glad we are friends.

Have a happy and peaceful day.

And peaceful day.

Like You is written and hosted by me,

Noah Glenn.

I also composed and performed the Like You theme music and other music that appeared in this episode.

Our podcast cover art was illustrated by Maya Sain,

And our episode art is created by Lindsey Glenn.

Thanks for listening!

Reviews

Loved that! I clicked on it cause I wanted to know what a real friendship should be like, my friends do some things that I don’t like, most of the time it’s in a now-days 11yr old joke. I don’t take offense to jokes like that though. 😁😎😎😎🤩❤️😉🤭

Well, that was adorable. As a grown up who is learning to reparent myself, I feel supported and hopeful. 🙂