Caring For Your Heart

How do we care for our hearts? In this talk, we will explore taking care of the heart. We'll discuss 3 ways you can interact with your heart to care for it, listen to it, and connect with it. When we support the heart, it supports us. Let's talk about healing the heart.

Transcript

We have to take care of our hearts.

They are very sensitive,

Complex,

Energetic structures.

I know that's not as romantic as the usual way we think of the heart,

But it's the truth.

When we go into the heart space,

We realize there's a lot going on.

So,

We have to take care of our hearts.

We have to take care of them.

And when we take care of our hearts,

They take care of us.

Right?

When we take care of our hearts,

They take care of us.

Because your heart is the way you feel the world.

It is the place that you feel in probably the deepest way we have as human beings.

What's going on with other people?

You feel and connect to others through the heart.

So,

It's a really powerful place.

And with that sensitivity comes potential for heartbreak,

For potential for pain.

So,

We have to be very gentle with our hearts.

Because they go through a lot,

Right?

They're out there in the world feeling,

And sometimes that's amazing.

Sometimes it's so fun.

The heart's on fire.

It's feeling in love.

It's feeling joy.

And sometimes it's hard.

We lose someone we love.

We go through an unexpected hard time.

We feel some sense of betrayal or unexpected difficulty.

That brings some sort of heartbreak or pain to the heart.

And then it's not fun anymore.

And that's when it's hard to be in the heart.

That's when we move away.

We pull away.

We don't like it anymore.

We're like,

That was fun when it was fun,

But it's not fun anymore.

So I'm gonna head out.

I'm not gonna feel this heart thing anymore.

That's what we do,

Right?

We run.

We leave the heart space.

Because it's hard.

But the thing is,

If we can stay in the heart,

If we can be in the heart,

Live from the heart,

Take care of the heart,

There's so much there for us.

Because when we leave the heart in a moment,

When we deny something that we truly desire,

Or when we block out a pain that's too much to bear,

When we disconnect the heartstrings so we don't have to feel it,

It leaves us empty.

It leaves us not full,

Not fully functioning at our highest potential.

The whole reason we're here is to love and to feel and to go through all of that rollercoaster that is life.

That's what we're here to do.

And the heart is the vehicle that helps us ride that rollercoaster.

So when we come out of the heart,

We come off the ride.

And life is just not the same.

And sometimes we know that we're disconnecting.

And sometimes we don't know.

Sometimes we do it without realizing it.

Sometimes a situation is so intense that we disconnect the heart.

And we don't even do it consciously.

It just happens because of the intensity.

And then it's like we're operating on a suboptimal level.

And we don't even realize it.

We don't remember what it's like to have an open heart.

To be going around in the world fully alive,

Fully open.

So we operate from these closed off spaces.

We guard ourselves from others.

Maybe we are quick to feel offended or take things personally.

Or we're quick to think that someone's hurt us when they say or do something.

Or we're afraid to take a chance.

We're afraid to open ourselves up to love.

We're afraid to pursue career opportunities that really excite us.

We're afraid to believe that our life can be extraordinary.

Because we've been disappointed before.

We've been let down.

And in those moments,

We've walked away in some way from our heart.

So how do we take care of the heart?

How do we care for the heart?

Which goes through so many things.

Which is our all important vehicle to experience life.

First,

We can listen to it.

The heart is speaking to us all the time.

And if you've spent many years with a disconnect from your heart,

Maybe it takes a little time to reconnect with it,

To hear it.

So first,

We listen.

And you can listen through breathing,

Putting your hand on your heart,

And talking to your heart,

Asking it what it's feeling,

How it's doing.

You can do this through journaling,

If you prefer.

You can ask your heart questions like,

How are you feeling today?

Or what do you love?

Or what do you really hope for?

You can journal with your heart.

Or you can talk with a friend or someone you love and trust.

And say,

Hey,

I'd really like to just tell you about something I love.

Or I'd like you to ask me about something I'm really excited about.

Questions can be really powerful to pull out,

Awaken,

Wake up certain things inside of us.

So we can do this.

We can listen and talk with the heart.

Another thing we can do is heal.

Heal the heart.

We can think of it like we have a relationship with the heart.

And imagine you have a friend who always wants to do something.

They're really excited.

They really love things.

They really have this passion and excitement to do something.

And you always tell them no.

You always say no.

No,

We're not doing that.

No,

I don't want to go there.

No,

I don't like that.

No,

No,

No,

No,

No.

And you're always telling your friend no.

The friend's not going to have that much fun with you.

They're not really going to be feeling like they're heard,

Especially if it's not just about fun.

If they come to you and they're hurting,

Or they're having a hard time and you're saying,

No,

I don't have time to listen to you right now.

No,

I don't care that you're going through that.

You need to just step it up.

Imagine telling this to a friend who's going through something difficult.

The friend's not going to feel like they have space in your relationship.

They're not going to feel like you really hear them,

Like you're really listening.

It's the same with the heart.

The heart is always speaking to us in so many ways.

And are we listening is the question.

Are we giving space to the relationship with the heart?

Does the heart have space in our relationship,

Or are we squashing it?

Are we controlling it?

Are we constricting it?

Are we saying no and not now,

And I don't want to listen to you,

And I don't want to hear it?

You know,

Like how do we talk to our heart?

What's our relationship with it?

And healing with the heart can be healing that relationship,

Healing the way we interact with our own heart.

Another thing we can do is interact with life.

We can interact with life from the heart space.

So I can go outside my door today and say,

OK,

Heart.

Maybe in the past I haven't listened as much,

But today is your day.

I'm giving you the spotlight.

Let's go.

Let's live a day from the heart.

I'll follow your lead.

And let the heart lead.

Let the heart speak.

You know,

If there's someone you really care about,

Let the heart share how much you love them,

How grateful for you are for them.

If there's been this coffee shop you're so excited you've been secretly desiring to go to,

Go.

And the heart is saying,

Oh,

I would just love it so much if we could just go to that coffee shop.

It would be so fun.

Or go to that park.

Or try that place that I've always wanted to go.

Try that new activity.

Just all these little ways we can listen to the heart.

And what comes up when we listen to the heart often is fear.

Why aren't we all just totally living in the heart,

Walking around,

Sharing our love freely,

Expressing ourselves fully,

And living passionately all the time?

Why aren't we doing that?

Because of fear.

Because there's been some time in the past where it got painful.

It got difficult to live from your heart.

You maybe told someone you loved them.

And they treated you badly.

Or maybe you were really excited to go somewhere.

And you got a huge disappointment.

It didn't turn out the way you wanted to.

Or it even went badly.

So this is an interesting question.

Why sometimes does it feel like we follow the heart and it doesn't go well?

Have you ever experienced this before?

Your heart tells you to do something or say something or you lead with the heart and it ends badly.

So there's a couple answers here.

One is that we can only put out what we feel into the world.

And the world has its own reaction back.

So there might be a time when your heart truly is in love with someone or truly wants to do something.

And you really say yes to it.

And you do it or say it.

And you don't get the response you want.

The person doesn't feel the same way.

Or things don't work out with that thing you really wanted.

That's a real reality.

And there's so much complexity there of why things don't work out.

There's a couple of things.

One,

It might not be the right time.

Or if it involves another person,

If your heart is ready,

Maybe their heart isn't.

So if you express your feelings to someone openly and excitedly and they don't reciprocate,

Maybe they really don't feel that way.

Or maybe their heart isn't open,

Isn't ready to feel that way.

And we have to respect that.

That's just a part of life.

But how does it feel that you shared your part,

That you let out your feelings,

And that you don't have to carry that around anymore,

That you said no to love,

Or that you weren't willing to take a risk?

You went for it.

You opened your heart.

And that takes courage.

That's commendable.

And I commend you for doing it.

And other times with the heart,

Sometimes,

Because we can hold pain there,

The pain can speak.

The pain can push us in a certain direction.

For example,

If you have feelings for someone and you're really drawn towards them and you want to connect deeper,

You want some sort of intimacy in some way,

There's often the case where there's a part of us,

A part of our pain,

That says,

I didn't feel wanted at some point in my life,

Maybe even when I was a child.

And now this person reminds me of who didn't want me.

And if I can get them to want me,

I will feel wantable.

I will feel wanted.

I will feel lovable.

I will feel victorious.

I have overcome this experience in my life that has left this great impression on me.

So these types of things happen.

Sometimes the pain leads the way.

And that's why we do these things to connect with the heart.

That's why we have to get to know the heart,

Become very intimate with our own heart,

So that we can see when these things come in.

We can see,

Where is this coming from?

OK,

I have this part of me when my friend didn't invite me to some event.

OK,

The pain in my heart from the past times I was excluded gets triggered and comes up and says,

Oh my gosh,

What a bad friend.

This person doesn't care about me,

So I shouldn't care about them.

And it wants to create distance with them.

And if we are honest and skillful and graceful,

Yes,

There are circumstances where someone might not be treating you right.

And it might be time to re-evaluate that relationship.

But sometimes there are situations where it wasn't personal.

It wasn't about us.

But we interpret it that way because of the lens of pain.

And so there's another opportunity if in the case that it is a good friend.

And there is some sort of circumstance that maybe you're not aware of,

That you didn't get invited to this dinner.

Or maybe it was a mistake,

Or whatever the circumstance.

But you have the opportunity to look at that situation through the lens of the pain of the heart,

Or through the love of the heart,

Through the understanding and compassion of the heart.

And so through the compassion lens,

Maybe there's some situation.

There's a reason why all these people got together and they didn't tell me about it.

Maybe I wouldn't have wanted to go anyway,

And they sensed that.

Maybe there's some space here to express to my friend gently that,

Hey,

I wish I would have been invited.

That looked like a fun time.

And have a conversation.

And maybe there's a conversation needed.

There's just these opportunities to use different filters,

Different lenses from the heart space to evaluate our situations in life.

And we have those opportunities when we know ourselves,

When we know our hearts.

OK,

Here's my pain from the past that always feels excluded.

Here's a situation where now I'm feeling excluded.

OK,

Let me use the lens of compassion here.

Am I really being excluded?

Or is this just triggering something from my past?

Is there a way I can lead with compassion and love?

Is there a way I can include others or include myself in some way?

So we have a lot of opportunities in the heart space.

And there's a lot to explore.

So one of the most important things we can do is begin to get to know and intimately understand the movements of our heart.

Because when your heart speaks,

There's some place inside you that's coming from.

And that honestly could be a place of pain or a place of joy and love and expansion.

And it's important that we know the difference.

Because every moment is an opportunity to choose which lens of the heart that we are moving from.

Which lens,

Which part of ourself are we speaking from?

Are we living from?

And can we go in and soothe our pain,

Soothe our hearts,

And be the healing that we need to move into more love,

Move into more joy,

More compassion as we look at the world and interact with it?

These are the types of choices we get to make.

These are the opportunities we have when we live in communion with our heart.

We are in oneic s sense of living

Reviews

Dear Kristy, thank you for your inspiration and leadership. Sending good wishes. ☘️

Def. Something to think about. Balancing staying open and protecting and caring for our hearts! Thank you! 🙏🏾 🧘🏾‍♀️