Become One With The Other: Radiance Sutras Verse 83

During this session, we discuss Verse 83 of the Yukti Verses from the 'Radiance Sutras', a translation of the Vijanana Bhairava Tantra by Lorin Loche. A meditation follows our discussion.

These sessions are recorded on a weekly basis and all are welcome.

Transcript

We are reading from this book,

The Radiant Sutras,

Which is a translation of the Vijnana by Rava Tantra by Lauren Roche.

It's a book of sutras or of verses that each one,

When we sort of dive into them deeply,

Can change us.

You know,

Sometimes in life,

Especially if we're on a spiritual journey or a healing journey of any kind,

Like even if you're trying to heal your body of some kind of ailment or joint pain or anything like that,

We often are looking for this one thing and if I do this one thing then I'm going to be better or I'm going to do this one thing and I'm finally going to be able to lose the weight or gain the weight or I do this one thing and then all of a sudden all the pain leaves in my body.

But human beings are so complex in a wonderful way.

We are multi-dimensional beings,

Like even if you simply look at the physical aspects of our bodies,

When you look at the blood system,

You look at the lymphatic system,

You look at the cardiovascular,

You look at the neurological impulses and all these wonderful things within us,

And then you think of all the millions of ways these systems interact with each other.

And then you imagine that there is an energetic system equally or even more complex that maybe spreads from thousands of lifetimes that are all interacting and informing each other and this person that we are today is the very interesting culmination of all those interesting things.

I think this is why,

You know,

When they talk about how yoga is the journey to the self,

Through the self,

It is an infinite journey.

It's only when we've simplified ourselves into,

I am a 55 year old woman who lives in Canada,

I weigh this much,

I have this much in my bank account.

When we simplify ourselves to a bunch of data,

We think,

Well,

There's nothing that much interesting to go with in me,

Right?

But that's what we don't understand.

We are so infinitely interesting.

And so the journey of Tantra,

The journey of merging our own divine self with our own physical self within,

It's like being a Rubik's cube.

And you just want,

But a Rubik's cube with,

Well,

Not a Rubik's cube,

Like a Rubik's duodecahedron,

Like a 12-sided shape or a thousand-sided shape.

And imagine you read one sutra and you turn one face of this beautiful thing,

Or maybe it turns two faces.

And then what you want to do is allow the effects of those turns to integrate through all the other thousand parts,

Which is kind of nice why we have this class once a week,

Because it kind of gives us a week to allow all the other parts to shift and change.

Then we read a new sutra and we allow something else,

Very subtle sometimes,

To shift inside of us.

But sometimes,

You know,

I think the most subtle shifts are the most powerful things that we do in all of our lives.

Let's say you think,

You know what,

I really want to become fit.

You know,

I really want to feel good in my body.

And for anyone here who's ever been out of shape and then started to work out in a way that you really liked,

Whether it was dancing or CrossFit or running or walking or whatever,

And you think what society tells you,

Oh,

That it's because you want to look good,

Or you want to be able to buy clothes that you like or something.

But when you do that,

When you find an exercise program that you really like,

Suddenly your legs work better and your back is stronger and you just you climb up stairs and suddenly all the muscles that are supposed to be climbing the stairs are climbing the stairs and you're like,

Well,

That's easy.

And life becomes easier and it's wonderful.

But maybe you just did the tiniest thing.

Maybe all you did was say,

You know what,

Every day I'm going to walk out to the point.

I'm going to look at the water and I'm going to walk home.

Or I'm going to just walk uptown.

I'm going to do one thing that I enjoy and that one tiny subtle shift affects everything.

And what's crazy is your soul takes one step forward towards happy.

And then that kind of shifts around.

And then maybe a week later,

You're like,

You know,

I found this great recipe that seems to really make me feel good,

So I'm going to make it more often.

And you keep making these subtle changes.

I used to have horrible migraines.

I was married 30 years ago.

I was married 30 years ago.

Probably for 15 years on the farm married.

I would get migraines that would just knock me out for days.

Like I was that poor person under the covers just wanting to die.

Like that was me.

And I couldn't find the answer.

But then you start doing little things.

I discovered kundalini yoga.

I discovered meditation.

I discovered dancing.

I did all these different things.

And then it was about,

It had to have been probably 10 years ago,

I was teaching a yoga class.

And this woman,

We were all sitting around having yogi tea after,

And she said to me something about,

Oh,

I have really bad migraines.

And I said,

Oh,

Yeah,

I used to have really bad migraines.

She goes,

Oh,

What did you do?

And I said,

I don't know.

I don't know what I did.

But I don't do that anymore.

On occasion today,

I still will,

Maybe once a year or something.

I'll head into one.

But I don't know.

And that's the beautiful thing of a spiritual journey,

Of a tantric journey,

Of a yogic journey.

Oftentimes,

We don't know the things that shifted us,

Because they're so subtle.

And that is really how these sutras work.

Oscillation of perpetuating divinity.

Ooh,

That's a good t-shirt.

Subtle shift yesterday was instead of doom and gloom about being a single 50 year old mom,

I'm choosing to look at the bright side.

There's a lot of bright sides to being a single 50 year old mom.

All right,

So what we're going to do is we're going to read a sutra.

Today,

We are reading number 83.

And then we're going to have a conversation about it.

And then we're going to do a meditation.

So let's close our eyes.

Let's just breathe deeply.

Really allowing your belly to expand as we inhale,

Contract as we exhale.

Everyone knows there is me.

And then there are all these others.

This is common to all.

Lovers know there is me.

And the source of this me is ever mysterious.

Lovers know each contact with another is a spark of the divine.

Lovers move through this world,

Awake to intimacy,

Each touch a revelation,

Never to be repeated.

What comes to you when you hear that thought or an emotion?

Specific words.

Appreciate the subtlety of ever changing presence.

Ever opening and deepening revelation of who I am.

Openness to joy and uniqueness of each.

Each touch never to be repeated.

Heartfelt connections,

Spirit of love.

Lovers has many levels of love.

That I miss the intimacy of a close relationship and what that brings.

Not every person is a lover.

The mystery of divine connection.

Inviting the divine into intimacy expands experience.

I'm getting hung up on the me and or versus lovers,

The connection of these concepts.

Awesome.

Let's start there.

So this sutra is all about understanding the subject-object relationship that we have.

And it's about understanding the subject-object relationship that we have here in the world,

Here in duality.

So the first sutra says,

Everyone knows there is me and then there are all these others.

This is common to all.

So when we're born,

We're aware that there's me and then there's that person and that dog and that,

Like this experience of duality is normal.

Now,

Subject and object.

Subject is always the one experiencing something.

So if I see the dog,

I am the subject.

The dog is the object.

I'm driving the car.

I am the subject.

The car is the object.

I'm driving the car.

I am the subject.

The car is the object.

This is normal.

It's normal to feel the separation of me and the dog,

Me and my partner,

Me and the TV.

That's normal.

That's the definition of duality.

But the next part,

Lovers know there is me and the source of this me is ever mysterious.

So first of all,

This word lovers,

They don't actually mean people who are in a sexually intimate relationship.

Kate said lovers has many levels.

Imagine that a lover is one who loves you.

We often think of lover or love as being like a second chakra experience that it's my sexual interaction with someone.

It's you or we are in a committed relationship.

We are lovers.

But if we imagine being a lover from the fourth chakra,

This is universal love.

This is the love of trees,

The love of autumn.

The love of coffee.

I remember one time there was a Buddhist Lama and he said,

Everybody loves something even if it's nachos.

So imagine you are a lover when you walk around laughing.

I love that I woke up today.

I love being a woman.

I love being 55 years old.

I love getting to be here with you guys.

I love that.

I am a lover.

I'm a loving person.

I'm a lover.

Another way of understanding this term lover is,

So in this book,

The Divine Union of the Masculine and Feminine,

This is essentially,

Imagine love means connection.

So the masculine and feminine,

For example,

In this book,

The masculine may be the giver and the feminine is the receiver.

And this is everything.

This is you filling a bowl.

This is you talking,

Someone listening.

This is you.

This is again,

Just a simple interaction in duality.

If you are a lover and you are a connected person,

You give in connection with the person receiving.

You give them something they need.

You give them something they want because you're a connected person.

You understand this.

If you receive something from someone,

You actually genuinely appreciate it if it's something you want because you're connected to them and you can feel their love.

You can feel their connection.

You can feel their desire.

You can feel all that.

And again,

I'm not talking about anything sexual.

I'm just talking about connection.

So imagine if you are a lover,

You walk around the world connected to others.

It doesn't matter.

Maybe you're just going to the restaurant and the server comes over and you are connected to that person as a fellow human being.

And you look them in the eye and you say,

Hey,

How's it going?

You are a lover.

You are connecting humans.

Imagine you hang out with your dog and you sit and you connect to that dog.

And the dog's kind of like itching for something.

And you're like,

You want to go for a walk,

Don't you?

Let's go for a walk.

This is love.

This is connection.

You are a lover.

So then the next step and the real point of this sutra is that so you can feel these steps,

Right?

One step is you simply love all things.

And this is part of that when you're just simply loving from that unconditional place.

You really understand as a yogi or as a tantric that there is way more to life than what we think.

And even this sense of I,

The very fact that I exist is a divine miracle.

Or as Jen said,

An oscillation of perpetual divinity.

Even I can say I am Katrina Boss.

I have no idea what I'm saying.

I have no idea what this creation is.

I have no idea what animates me.

I don't know where ideas come from.

I don't know anything.

I don't know why I sound like this.

I don't know why I look like this.

I don't know why.

I don't know anything.

So this is the second sutra.

Lovers know there is me and the source of this me is ever mysterious.

Just taking that alone.

Imagine living your life walking around knowing that you have no idea why you're here.

And not in a depressing way like I don't know why I'm here.

But you're actually tickled because first of all you're entertained that you are here.

Like that alone is enough of a miracle.

Like that alone is pretty awesome.

And I can't fathom it.

But I'll play.

I'll play.

Okay.

I'm here.

But the point of this sutra is to go even further.

And if you imagine that you are some beautiful wellspring from this,

I don't know this infinite bowl of consciousness.

And then you meet another person.

You become very aware that they also spring from that same well of consciousness.

You both come from the same mystery.

That dog comes from the same well of mystery.

Those trees come from the same well of mystery.

And suddenly you realize that we are one.

There's a unity that we feel.

And this is the awareness of the yogi,

Of the tantric,

Of the lover.

That I understand that we are separate.

And I understand that we are the same.

You can live in both.

But it's like you have a loose grip on both,

But you're aware that they're both there.

But oftentimes you tend to go all the way over to one side or all the way to the other.

And it's a good thing.

I'm just going to read what Chen says.

The adjustment via that Rubik's cube decadent or whatever as we shift,

A facet is open to the radiance or sunlight of the spirit.

We open to let a mirror neuron effect happen with divinity.

Totally.

So then the last sutra here,

Lovers know each contact with another is a spark of the divine.

So first you have the inner awareness that,

Wow,

I am literally a manifest spark of divinity.

Every person here,

Imagine there's 120 people here and there's 120 unique sparks of divinity right here together.

So here,

Each contact with another is a spark of the divine.

Even us all being together right now is like a resonant moment for all of these sparks of divinity.

Imagine all of our consciousness sitting in a very interesting room.

Why it warms our hearts when we connect.

Exactly.

Lovers move through this world awake to intimacy,

Each touch a revelation never to be repeated.

I'm putting together a slideshow for my dad's 90th birthday.

So I was sitting,

Drinking my coffee,

Putting together this Canva slideshow because I've discovered Canva and it's a miracle when it comes to slideshows.

And all of a sudden I had this urge to go running barefoot.

And I used to do this.

I used to like run 5Ks barefoot.

I'm not a runner at all.

I'm more of a turtle.

But there is something that drives me to running barefoot.

So I got my clothes on and my running clothes on and I ran out there.

I walked out the door because I was actually really stiff and I went for this lovely run walk.

And then this little voice in my head said,

Why don't we go out to that swing set by the bluff?

And I went out and jumped on a swing and swang,

Swang.

I don't know if that's a word,

But I swung on the swing for a little while.

But that moment,

And I might say to myself,

Oh,

I'm going to start doing that all the time.

I'm going to start going for a little running,

Going for,

But the reality is I will never experience that exact thing that I just did again,

If I'm paying attention.

And what I really love about this journey of exploring the subject object relationship is it is truly an end statement.

It isn't that experiencing unity is more important than experiencing the diversity of you and I,

Or of subject and object.

It's really important for me to understand that I am not you.

Because if I don't understand that I'm not you,

I'm going to get in your business.

I'm going to think I have some idea what you should be doing in your life.

I'm going to have judgment.

I'm going to think that I am worse than you or better than you.

The fact that I fully embrace the idea that we are actually completely unique sparks of divinity allows me to look at you and love the diversity between us.

That I don't want everyone to be like me.

I don't want everyone to think like me.

I don't want everyone to hold my value systems.

I don't want that.

I actually want you to be you.

You're not supposed to be me.

We are supposed to be unique.

And when that isn't clear,

We can get into a lot of trouble.

And ironically,

When that's not clear,

We struggle to love.

Like to truly love someone.

Because if you don't love someone for actually who they are,

You don't love them.

That's not love.

Love is connection.

Genuine connection.

Heart to heart connection.

So it's interesting that on the one hand,

We completely embrace diversity.

Even to say that if all these people that are here right now,

All got into a room,

Even though we are all interested in the Radiant Sutras and we love gathering together,

I don't know that we could find a more diverse group of people.

And wouldn't it be a shame if we all became the same?

Wouldn't that be a shame for us to lose who we were?

So honoring the diversity is one of the biggest parts of the tantric path.

But now to imagine fully loving the diversity,

Because you know that we are all one.

Because as I allow you to be your own diverse self,

Guess what happens?

I get to be my diverse self.

The more I embrace your absolutely different way of seeing the world,

The more easy it will be for me to have a different opinion than you.

But if I need you to believe what I believe,

Then I'm not going to actually be honest about what I believe either.

Not with myself,

So therefore not with anyone.

Okay,

Based on that,

I might have to re-evaluate my marriage,

Because there are days that are hard to love my other half just the way I see.

The funny thing about marriage and relationships and family,

Because Christy then says,

Because Christy then says,

So why is it that we can love the diversity of strangers,

But we find it hard with family and ourselves?

I saw a little clip on Facebook this morning,

And it was a woman teaching about relationships,

And she said,

And I don't necessarily agree with all of this,

But what she said was that human beings have two needs,

Attachment and authenticity.

And she said,

The problem is,

We often bury our authenticity for the sake of attachment,

And then eventually our true selves come out,

And then the relationship ends.

So then we start to believe that I can't be my authentic self and have relationship,

That kind of thing.

And then her next example was,

So let's say you have a really hot temper.

So you get into a relationship and you bury that hot temper for the first month,

Second month,

Third month,

And you've got this nice relationship,

So you're all happy.

And then all of a sudden,

One day,

You let that temper out,

And the person leaves,

And now you've experienced abandonment.

And eventually you learn that you're not allowed to be your true self.

I mean,

There's a few,

I mean,

We could talk about that one concept for a long time.

But what really struck me was the normalization of really unhealthy antisocial behavior.

To say that I have a really hot temper,

There's something wrong with that.

That's not a healthy state of being.

That's a wound.

That's like someone saying,

I'm going to run that marathon even though I have a broken leg.

No,

You have a broken leg.

You should fix the broken leg.

And if you have a hot temper,

Because to realize that if your hot temper drives people away,

Other things that are going along with that hot temper is unkindness,

Is meanness.

If that temper,

When unleashed,

Is hurting other people,

Then this is actually something that needs to be worked on and healed.

This isn't who you are.

Who you are isn't a wounded person that lashes out at people.

That's not your authentic self.

That's a wounded self.

And so it's a very interesting thing to say that.

But you can still love someone and know that they're wounded.

You can love someone and know that they're really hurting and they lash out.

And in that love,

You can say,

You know,

You really need to heal that.

And if they don't want to,

Well,

They don't have to.

But to say that they're not allowed to be their authentic self,

That's not actually it.

They're not allowed to hurt you.

And eventually you're not going to stick around to get hit again,

Verbally,

Physically,

Whatever.

But the problem isn't that they're not being authentic.

The problem is that they're lashing out at people,

Which I describe as anti-social behavior,

Because it pushes people away.

Human beings aren't meant to be anti-social.

We're meant to be lovers.

And anything that isn't loving is something we have to look at,

Or we can look at.

All right,

We're going to have a little meditation here.

You guys ready?

Let's close our eyes.

Let's breathe deeply.

And I want you to imagine yourself walking down the street.

And it's a beautiful day.

The sun is shining.

It's quiet.

All you can hear is a breeze going through the trees.

There's a park bench ahead of you.

So you go and sit on the park bench.

And in front of the park bench is a tree,

A beautiful tree.

And you notice yourself watching the tree.

And how different the tree is from you,

And how beautiful it is.

And as you're looking at the tree,

You let some part of your mind relax,

Similar to letting your eyes go a little fuzzy.

Similar to letting your eyes go a little fuzzy.

And you start to feel the tree and its roots going down into the earth.

And you can feel it.

You can feel the tree's roots going down into the earth,

Reaching into the soil,

Reaching for water and nutrients.

And you realize that you and the tree are the same.

You are made of the same stuff.

Earth,

Fire,

Water,

Air.

You and the tree are one.

And then you gently release from the tree and you're sitting back on the bench.

And you see the tree again.

And then it becomes a fun little game that you allow your mind and your eyes to blur and you become the tree.

And you release and you're separate again.

And maybe imagine for a moment that there is a river,

A small little stream flowing beside the tree.

And you look at the stream and you allow your mind to relax.

And suddenly you can feel the stream.

You can feel the movement of the water.

You can imagine yourself as the stream.

And you can feel the feeling of the rocks and the fish,

And the coolness,

And the swirling eddies.

And then you release back to your spot on the bench and you see the river,

The stream again.

And then you become the stream again.

And you play with the stream this way.

And then you see the tree and the stream.

You relax that consciousness.

And you realize that you are both of these things as well.

And then you allow everything around you to be part of you.

And then you release them all.

And you look at your body.

And you smile and you look at your And then you release them all.

And you look at your body.

And you smile and you look around at the tree and the stream and the grass and the birds.

You imagine what a miracle this is.

To be one and yet get to experience each other.

And sitting on your bench,

Closing your eyes and breathing deeply and listening.

Everyone knows there is me.

And then there are all these others.

This is common to all.

Lovers know there is me.

And the source of this me is ever mysterious.

Lovers know each contact with another is a spark of the divine.

Lovers move through this world,

Awake to intimacy.

Each touch a revelation never to be repeated.

So what comes to you?

How do you feel?

Or what words do you want to bring into your day or your evening?

Well,

I invite you to play with this all day long.

Whatever you see,

Whatever you taste,

Whatever you smell.

To just allow yourself to become one with the other.

And then separate.

And then one with the other and then separate.

And to play with this in your consciousness.

And to play with this in your consciousness.

I'm going to tap into the lover side of me on the freeway today.

Genius.

Non-monogamy.

No,

It's more,

It's not,

This isn't even about lovers.

It's just about being the lover in life.

The miracle of life makes me appreciate the moments of deep connection.

Although I long for them to be repeated,

I instead could look forward to new unique moments connecting with those I love.

Exactly.

The appreciation of the moments never to be repeated.

This dance with others is like playing with light.

Radiates so beautifully,

But can get lost quick too.

We are to be gentle souls alive with the experience of life.

Namaste,

Gina.

You always make me appreciate this mysterious divine life more.

Non-grasping.

Mm-hmm.

Totally.

Thank you so much for being here and I hope you have a wonderful day.

Reviews

Of course my first interpretation of the word “lover” was an intimate partner. And of course the verse applies to that person too. But I am loving redefining that word to include everyone and everything I love. It’s also nice how it defines the mysterious in the verse, when one feels like one with the other, a tree or the river for exemple. The mysterious Source we all come from. Because often I just don’t know like you said. It’s all so mysterious. And it was very enlightening to hear you explain that the conditions the others need to heal from are not for me to love but for the other to heal from. And I don’t have to sacrifice authenticity for attachment. So much good stuff this morning. Thank you.