Making Difficult Decisions

When facing difficult choices, clarity doesn’t come from overthinking but from gently resting with the questions. Like seeds planted in the soil of our consciousness, they grow quietly through mindful presence and patience. By trusting the natural unfolding of our deeper mind, answers arise in their own time—clear, embodied, and free of doubt.

Transcript

Hi there.

When we're faced with difficult choices,

Whether about our work,

Relationships,

Or a significant life change,

It's easy to get caught in loops of overthinking,

Trying to resolve everything with our minds.

But true clarity doesn't usually come from thinking harder.

These questions often live deeper than our surface thoughts.

We can learn to treat these questions like seeds,

Planting them gently in the soil of our consciousness and allowing them to rest.

Our daily practice of mindfulness,

Returning to the present moment again and again with kindness and ease,

Becomes the sunshine and rain that helps those seeds to grow.

We learn not to dig them up repeatedly to check if they're growing.

Instead,

We trust that something is quietly unfolding beneath the surface.

This is the work of store consciousness,

The deeper layer of mind that processes and ripens things in their own natural time.

When the moment is right,

An answer will arise,

Not forced,

But clear,

Embodied,

And free of doubt.

In this meditation,

We'll explore the tender and often uncomfortable territory of making difficult choices.

While we make decisions every day,

Some call on us to bring more presence,

More clarity,

Courage,

And patience.

This practice invites us to slow down,

Listen inwardly,

And trust the wisdom already within us.

Let's begin.

Find a posture that feels steady and at ease.

Gently close your eyes or soften your gaze.

Allow your shoulders to relax and let your hands rest wherever they feel comfortable.

Begin by noticing your breath just as it is,

Flowing in and flowing out.

There's nowhere else you need to be right now.

Let this be a space of quiet presence.

If it feels right,

Gently bring to mind a choice you're currently facing.

It may be big or small,

Clear or confusing.

Just let the image or feeling of this decision arise without judgment.

There's no need to solve anything here.

You're simply welcoming the question into a compassionate space.

Notice how your body responds as you hold this choice in awareness.

Do you feel tension,

Hesitation,

Curiosity,

A mixture of emotions?

Breathe with whatever is present.

When we're facing a difficult decision,

We often hear many inner voices.

The voice of fear,

The voice of habit,

The voice of longing,

The voice of expectation.

Take a few breaths to listen without clinging to any of them.

Ask inwardly,

What is this really about?

What matters most here?

Sometimes clarity comes not from thinking harder,

But from softening enough to hear what's true beneath the noise.

If you're feeling unsure,

Even where to begin,

That's okay.

Let's just explore a couple of possibilities gently,

Knowing there may be more.

You're not narrowing yourself,

Only listening.

As best you can,

Bring to mind option A,

One possible direction or outcome.

Visualize it.

Imagine yourself having made that choice.

How does your body feel?

Light or heavy?

Open or contracted?

Do any emotions arise?

Relief,

Anxiety,

Peace,

Dread?

Take a few breaths with what comes.

Let that image gently fade and now bring to mind option B,

Another possible path.

Again,

Feel it in your body.

Notice any shifts in the breath,

Posture or emotion.

There's no need to figure it out,

Just listening.

Sometimes the body knows before the mind does.

And at times,

The difficulty isn't choosing between option A and option B.

At times it feels like there are 7 options,

Or 17.

Maybe they're tangled together.

Maybe none of them feel quite right.

If that's your experience right now,

Know that you're not alone.

Life rarely lays things out as a tidy either-or.

So instead of trying to sort everything out all at once,

This practice invites you to relate in a different way,

Not by solving the problem,

But by making space for the feeling of being in the middle of it.

Take a moment to sense the overwhelm itself.

Where do you feel it in your body?

Is it tightness in the chest,

A buzzing in the head,

A sinking in the gut?

You don't have to push it away or figure it out.

Just gently notice it,

Let it be there,

Let yourself breathe with it.

And then offer yourself a little kindness.

You might say silently,

This is a lot right now,

And I'm doing the best I can,

Or it's okay not to know yet.

This is the ground we return to,

Not the clarity of having made a decision,

But the stability of being present with ourselves in the midst of uncertainty.

When we can soften around the overwhelm,

Space begins to open.

From that space,

Clarity eventually can arise.

Notice what shifts,

Even slightly,

When you stop trying to figure it out.

Now rest in the space between options.

You don't need to resolve anything right now.

Bring the choice or question back into your awareness,

This time seeing it not as a problem to solve,

But as a seed.

Let it settle deep in the soil of your consciousness.

There's nothing you need to do.

Allow yourself to soften into not knowing.

If it feels helpful,

Gently lean back a little,

Inviting a sense of ease and surrender.

Feel the support of the earth beneath you,

Steady and holding.

Just as you are supported,

So is the seed.

It doesn't need to be rushed.

Though uncertainty can be uncomfortable,

It also holds vast possibility.

Take a few deep,

Steady breaths.

Let your body settle,

Present and grounded.

Give the seed permission to take the time it needs,

Trusting your deeper wisdom to reveal the way forward when it's ready.

Let yourself rest in the pause.

The pause between confusion and clarity.

This space is sacred.

It's where insight begins.

Repeat inwardly,

I don't have to know right now.

I can be with the not knowing.

Breathe.

Settle.

Now bring your attention to what matters most to you.

Ask gently,

What kind of person do I want to be in this situation?

What values do I want this decision to reflect?

Is it kindness?

Courage?

Simplicity?

Integrity?

Let these values rise naturally.

They are your inner compass,

Quiet and steady.

As you sit with these values,

Consider this gentle reminder to choose the bigger life.

This is one of Gretchen Rubin's aphorisms that I really love.

Choose the bigger life,

Not the life that feels safer or smaller,

But the one that stretches you toward meaning,

Connection or growth.

The bigger life may not be the easier path,

But it's the one that honors who you truly are becoming.

Let your breath carry you in this exploration.

Inhale,

Opening.

Exhale,

Honoring.

We often long for the right answer,

But sometimes what matters more is bringing the right presence to the process.

By practicing awareness,

Patience and care,

You are already aligning with wisdom.

Even now,

Something is unfolding.

You might say softly to yourself,

I am doing the best I can.

Clarity will come in time.

Breathe that in.

Let it land.

As this meditation comes to a close,

If it feels right,

Bring a hand to your heart.

Sense the quiet strength within you.

You don't have to rush toward resolution.

Wisdom often moves slowly.

But your willingness to be here,

To listen,

To stay present in uncertainty is an act of deep courage.

You can bring this quality of resting back into your daily life.

When you notice yourself leaning into the future,

Tensing or trying to force an answer,

See if you can pause.

Even try resting your body.

Let your chest soften,

Your arms release and gently lean back.

Let your body remind your mind it's okay to let go,

Even for a moment.

When you feel ready,

Lift your gaze or open your eyes,

Returning to the present moment.

May you move forward with trust,

Patience and care.

Thank you.

Reviews

Perfect. Exactly what I needed. Thank you 🙏🏻

Thank you for helping create spaciousness around my decision 🙏

Thank you dear Kaira for this gentle but deep reminder to trust and be present. I've been going back and forth about a decision and it's bothering me. I'll plant the seed and rest in the grace of trust.

A gentle quiet voice with so much wisdom. So helpful and reassuring, we don’t have to know the answers, we can rest in the knowledge to be able to trust ourselves. Stay present and mindful and see who we want be to help guide us in our decisions. Thank you I going to listen to this often.