Honouring Our Difficulties

In this meditation, Dr. Julien Lacaille invites you to open up to a difficult emotion, seeing it as a gift that can teach you about what deeply matters to you.

Transcript

On The Day The nickname was Schlphalt So as we settle into our seated posture or our lying posture,

Allowing our attention to rest on our breathing.

If it helps to put a hand on the chest or on the belly,

Just to feel that rise and that fall,

We can do that.

If it helps to take larger or deeper inhalations and exhalations,

We can do that also.

And eventually just letting breathing return to its natural rhythm.

Breathing if you can feel the body as a whole,

Breathing on its own.

And we can start generating an attitude of acceptance by seeing the air that we breathe in as a gift that's offered to us and that we receive with a thank you.

And with a spirit of kindness,

Of generosity,

We give back on the exhalation.

So on each in-breath,

Practicing receiving with open arms a gift.

And on each exhalation,

Practicing generosity,

Giving back.

And with a spirit of kindness,

Of generosity,

We give back.

And as you continue to practice acceptance and generosity,

Seeing if you can kind of shift your body posture or maybe your mental posture in slight ways to be a little bit more accepting and a little bit more generous.

And just getting interested,

How does my body change posture when I'm practicing receiving a gift openly and giving a gift of generosity?

Maybe the chest opens.

Maybe there's a half smile that forms on the face,

Softening of the facial muscles or other muscles in the body.

Maybe there's a slight leaning forward.

And seeing if we can kind of maintain this general attitude throughout the meditation.

So as we kind of practice maintaining this posture,

I'll invite you now to recall a recent event that happened that was kind of difficult for you.

Not a nine out of 10,

But more of like a four out of 10 difficult situation.

Situation where maybe you weren't presenting the best version of you.

You're maybe being impulsive,

Avoidant,

Aggressive,

Withdrawing.

Just seeing if you can bring yourself back to this situation.

As though you were there now.

Maybe there's someone with you.

Maybe you're in front of your computer.

Maybe you're in the car.

So what's the context in which this difficulty is showing up?

At work,

At home?

And then see if you can remember what was said,

What was done.

Or not said or not done.

As you remember this,

Seeing if right here,

Right now,

This is impacting you in any way.

Breathing in with your body or any sensations being activated in your body.

Any thoughts about you,

About someone else?

Maybe they're negative.

Maybe they're about the future.

Maybe they're about how it's going to impact you negatively.

And then seeing if there are any emotions around that situation,

Around those thoughts,

Around those sensations.

Maybe you can label the emotion.

Maybe there's more than one.

And as you start to identify potential emotions that are there,

Seeing if you can identify where in your body these are showing up.

And then kind of gently directing your attention in that region of the body.

So it might be the throat or the chest or the stomach or some other place,

The shoulders.

Just finding where that emotion lives in your body.

And then with a sense of curiosity,

Just letting your attention rest in that area.

Noticing the emotional pain in that area.

You can even imagine yourself putting your hand there or you can actually put your hand there.

That's going to help keep your attention there.

And then in the same way we were practicing receiving or accepting the breath,

The in-breath,

In giving with generosity or out-breath.

Let's see if we can do the same thing with the sensation that's showing up,

With this emotion that's showing up.

So seeing this emotion or the arising of this emotion as a gift,

A gift that we usually refuse.

But here we're practicing something different.

Maybe there's actually something important in this gift.

And I practice opening up to this emotion,

These sensations in my body that remind me there's an emotion there.

And as an act of generosity,

Breathing into it,

Breathing into it and creating space for it,

Communicating the message,

It's okay,

You can be here,

Let me make some space for you.

Maybe you're a messenger of an important message.

Let me honor you.

Let me listen to you.

Let me let you be there.

So placing your attention in that region.

If you lost the emotion,

You can replay the situation again.

And once the emotion shows up,

Ah,

Hello,

There you are.

Maybe placing your hand on it to help place your attention on it.

We're receiving a gift.

Breathing as an act of generosity on each in-breath,

We're breathing into this area,

Creating more wiggle room for that emotion to be there.

So keeping up this practice of accepting and giving on your own.

And as an act of generosity,

Breathing into it,

Breathing into it and creating space for yourself.

And from time to time checking your posture both physically and mentally.

Finding if it's possible to adopt a posture that's a little bit more accepting,

A little bit more generous,

Kind.

As you continue opening up to this difficult emotion.

Anyway,

Do your best girls!

And as you do this,

Seeing if you can start to decode what the emotion is telling you about what's important to you.

What would you have to not care about to not have this emotion?

In other words,

We hurt where we care.

Everything has violated a kind of deep value we hold.

So as we kind of recall this difficult situation that activates this difficult emotion,

What does it say about what we care about?

Seeing if you can name that value.

It could be something like honesty,

Justice,

Self-care,

Self-respect,

Dignity.

Finding your own value or values that are linked to this pain.

And seeing if identifying this value can also inform your physical and your mental posture.

How could I embody this value right now?

And as we come to the end of the meditation,

I'm going to invite you to project yourself in the future now,

The near future,

Like later on today or maybe tomorrow.

And planning in your mind a way that you can embody this value,

This thing that is important to you.

What would someone who cares about this,

What would that person do?

How would she do it?

Just like seeing yourself in a movie,

Acting in line with this value.

And keeping this as an intention as we finish the meditation.

Reviews

So helpful! Knowing the relief of this meditation (and where to find it ;)) will help me to be less resistant when negative emotions will present themselves in my body in the future.

Whoooo Weee! As an alcohol in recovery, doing a fourth step (moral inventory), I got a lot out of this meditation. Thanks man!

Clear instructions. I feel cared for. Grounding. Thank you!

Hard work, but very helpful. I'll be coming back to this regularly. Thank you!

Profound, potentially even life-changing. Thank you for this.

I really loved the approach of using the breath as a way of touching in with acceptance, appreciation, generosity, and letting go. Thank you!

Shall return thank you

Thank you! 🙏🙏 I really appreciate the guidance and will revisit this again...especially for my anxiety.

Thank you for the gift of this meditation. It was exactly what I needed to receive this morning. With deep gratitude.

Thank you. The practice was for me a deep revealing experience.

For the honest to explore inner truth. Very healing.

Lovely, thank you :)

A beautiful exploration that connected body, mind and spirit. Thank you. 🙏🏻

Very therapeutic! Thank you so much!

The guidance to find & identify feelings, where they're held & to look at it was extremely beneficial. I appreciate this. Thank you. Namaste. 🙏💞

Very useful. Love this speaker's diction and quality of voice.

Perfect thank you!

Lovely and helpful

So very good. Actual healing cab occur with this practice. It's like listening to your therapist ask you questions, while you silently do the work. So much value here. Thank you!!!!

Absolutely amazing! Very challenging! I'm shocked to see how well it worked. I will definitely use this one again!