Have you ever felt really proud about owning something?
Perhaps you felt very proud about owning a certain type of car,
Having certain types of clothes,
Having a certain type of job.
Have you ever felt pride about the relationship that you have,
The person you're calling yours as you walk down the street?
Have you ever gotten out your phone or a computer or a piece of jewellery in front of other people and felt a sense of specialness in relation to others?
Well,
Is this type of pride okay?
Is it acceptable?
Is it really causing harm?
The ancient Stoics would say that this type of pride is actually foolish,
That you should not take pride over external things.
Why?
Because those things are not yours.
For example,
If a sports car,
A very nice sports car,
Was able to speak and it said,
I am proud to be an attractive sports car.
If we heard that from a sports car,
We would probably,
Maybe,
Maybe we could tolerate it.
Maybe we could say,
Okay,
The sports car is quite attractive,
It's quite nice looking,
Drives pretty fast.
The sports car is bragging about those qualities of its own,
So okay,
I'll kind of tolerate that.
But when you hear someone else boast about having a beautiful sports car,
Then what you are hearing is someone taking credit for traits that do not belong to them.
It is one thing to brag about traits that you have yourself,
But another thing entirely to brag about traits that you do not possess.
The beauty of a sports car does not belong to you,
And the sports car itself is only something that is borrowed by you from the world anyway.
So to take pride over the traits of external things that do not belong to you is foolish and arrogant.
Upon hearing this,
You might ask,
Well,
If it is foolish to take pride over traits that are not my own,
What is mine to feel pride about?
Am I allowed to feel any sort of pride,
Or should this emotion be banished forever?
Epictetus says in chapter 6 of the Enchiridion,
What quality belongs to you?
The intelligent use of impressions?
If you use impressions as nature prescribes,
Go ahead and indulge your pride,
Because then you will be celebrating a quality that is distinctly your own.
So Epictetus is telling us that if we intelligently and reasonably use our thoughts,
Actions,
Perspectives,
Intentions and judgments in a way that is wise,
That is something for which we can feel pride,
Because those things belong to you.
If you go back to the dichotomy of control,
The internal world that we inhabit,
And how we navigate that internal space,
Is up to us,
Is something we are responsible for.
And if we navigate that internal space wisely,
Then it is completely acceptable to feel pride.
So in terms of actionable implementation of this Stoic Principle,
If you encounter a situation,
And you start to feel the stirrings,
The impression of pride,
You can ask yourself,
Well,
Should I feel pride in this situation?
The follow-up question can be,
Does this thing belong to me?
Truly.
And we can think about the dichotomy of control here.
Is this thing I'm feeling proud about related to my reputation,
Or my physical body,
Or my material possessions,
Things that are outside of my control?
If I feel pride about these things,
Then it is foolish.
But if I feel pride about the way that I'm using my judgment,
Intentions and thoughts in a way that is virtuous and leads to wisdom,
Then I might just allow myself to feel some pride.
