The Four Stoic Virtues: A Practical Guide For Daily Life

A 30-minute Stoic reflection on wisdom, courage, justice and temperance. Rather than treating the four virtues as abstract ideals, you will look at how each one changes an ordinary decision: what is true, what fear asks you to avoid, what you owe other people, and where enough is enough. Use this when you feel pulled in different directions, then choose the virtue your next action needs most. Return whenever a decision feels muddy.

Transcript

One of the things you often hear when you start studying Stoicism is that the Stoic virtues or the cardinal virtues are incredibly important. And I completely agree. There's no good doing exercises like the view from above or premeditation of adversity if you are then going to completely disregard the Stoic virtues. It's like claiming to be a Buddhist while disregarding the Noble Eightfold Path. These frameworks exist for a reason. And the virtues are what fundamentally drives Stoicism. So the question is, What are the Stoic virtues exactly? Because as we'll see, The word virtue, Arete, Doesn't quite mean the same thing to us in the modern world as it did to the ancients. So a quick recap. Stoicism is an ancient philosophy. It was founded in Athens more than 2, 000 years ago. It offers a very practical roadmap for living a meaningful and fulfilling life, A life worth living, Ultimately. And at the heart of Stoicism, You find the four virtues, Often described as wisdom, Courage, Justice, And temperance. And these virtues are not just abstract ideas. They're meant to be forms of knowledge, Actionable principles that can help you day-to-day navigate life's challenges with a lot more clarity and poise. My goal here in this episode is to break down the virtues in more depth and in a beginner-friendly way. But also, If you're experienced with Stoicism, Hopefully you learn some new things here about how to interpret the virtues. And then I'm also going to weave in some practical applications for us modern folk who are interested in that question, How do we actually apply virtue and Stoicism to our lives? Stoicism was founded by Zeno of Kittim in the 3rd century BCE. And Stoicism teaches that the path to a life worth living lies in living in harmony or accord with nature, Our human nature and also universal nature. If you are confused when you hear this, You know, Living in accordance with nature, That's meant to be the case. Even the ancients would have probably been a bit confused about that. Sometimes the ancient Stoics like to come up with these short maxims or statements, Almost like shorthand mantras that they could then unpack later. Again, Similarly to Buddhism, If someone said, Happiness is about living in the now, It's not that it's not true, But you could absolutely create copious amounts of books, Notes, Practices and ideas that flesh out what living in the now actually means. A common misconception about Stoicism is that it's about suppressing emotions. If you look at the dictionary definition, It kind of hints that if someone is stoic or acting in a stoic way, Have a stiff upper lip, They're quite stern and serious. But really Stoicism in the philosophical sense is about knowing yourself, Knowing how your soul operates, Knowing how the mind works, Paying attention to that, Developing self-awareness, Seeing how impressions have an effect on you and how your thoughts then feed those impressions, Learning how to think rationally, Mastering the unhealthy passions and caring about the right things, Focusing on what truly matters. That is closer to what Stoic means in the philosophical sense. So there are some famous Stoics you've more than likely heard of, Marcus Aurelius, The Roman emperor, And Epictetus. I think the correct pronunciation for Epictetus, By the way, Is Epictetus. But I'm just going to use Epictetus because that's what I'm used to. Well, He was a former slave that turned philosopher and he left behind teachings that continue to inspire millions today, Including myself. The cool thing is you can get access to all of these ancient texts, Like the meditations from Marcus Aurelius or Epictetus's teachings, For free online. One of the core ideas that keeps coming up in Stoicism is that we can't control everything in life, But we can control how we respond. And if that is true, Well, How do we respond? The Stoics would say we should respond in a way that's guided by the most important virtues. And this is where the Stoic virtues come in. They're sort of like a compass for making decisions that lead then to a flourishing life. But I think we need to unpack what the word virtue means. So in modern language, And by the way, We're going to be looking at some alternative phraseology for these virtues that I like to use myself, But in modern language, The word virtue, To me at least, Has a sort of religious connotation or like a saintly connotation. If you say someone is virtuous, I just picture them as being this truly saint-like character, Kind and compassionate and self-sacrificing. But in ancient Greece, When they said arati, It's different. It has a different meaning from modern usage. So in ancient Greek thought, Virtue was not just about the moral correctness of a person, But it was more encompassing. It meant the overall excellence in fulfilling one's potential, Achieving excellence in all areas of life, Intellectual, Physical, And moral. It wasn't just about the moral side of life. Context also mattered, Right? So the ancient Greeks saw virtue as a relative to the individual's role in society. So if you were a soldier, But you weren't brave and you didn't try hard in a battle, You would not be virtuous. If you were a statesman, It meant that you acted with wisdom and prudence. In modern usage, We don't think so much of virtue within a role. And so yes, In modern usage, We think virtue applies to moral goodness or ethical conduct. But for the Greeks, Virtue had a wider range of qualities. So you would say that the virtue of a knife is the sharpness or the virtue of a horse is its speed and agility. So think of virtue as holistic excellence, The fulfillment of one's purpose within the context of society. So when you hear people say, I'm into spirituality, I'm interested in finding my purpose and living my purpose and finding my true calling, And I'm not drawn to Stoicism because that's too rational. That's one of the things I feared. Couldn't be further from the truth. Virtue or Arete was all about that. It was all about what is your role? What are your strengths and weaknesses? What is your purpose here on an individual level and as a general human being? And so if we think through this logically, Well, If the virtue of a knife is the sharpness of it, What could be the virtue for a human being in a general sense? Well, Human beings are different from other animals in the sense that we can use reason. We can do this thing called logic and math. So there's something unique about humans there. And we're very social. When our children are born, They can't fend for themselves for many years. We depend on each other. We are interconnected. So surely to be an excellent human being, We would be developed in this unique gift that we have, Reason, And we would be fulfilling our social role too. So let's look at what each of these virtues means now. So the first virtue is wisdom. For this, I prefer the phrase practical wisdom or reality literacy because wisdom can be a little bit ethereal, Esoteric, Hard to pin down properly. So wisdom in the Stoic sense is seeing reality clearly, Having knowledge of what is good, Bad, Or indifferent, Having knowledge of what you can control and what you can't control. In simple terms, Knowing what matters and making sound decisions. The next virtue is courage. For me, I like the phrase steadfast courage because it can be courageous to be consistent. It can be courageous to endure things. And this is acting rightly despite fear or adversity, Standing firm, Even in tough decisions. And the idea here is that virtues are praiseworthy. Virtues are honorable. Something that is praiseworthy and honorable is a virtue, Is something that we would consider to be a form of excellence. Then we have justice. Donald Robertson uses the term fair kindness here. The phrase that I use in my own lexicon is fair dealing, Similar. And this is where you treat other people fairly and you contribute to the common good. Remember the social element. Act kindly and also being fair to all. But that also means being fair to yourself. If you're putting other people above you, That would not be fair. If you're putting yourself above other people, That would not be fair. If you're being kind to other people, But not kind to yourself, That would not be fair. So justice applies both to other people and to yourself. Treating others as if they are friends, Treating yourself as if you're your own friend too. Then we have temperance. That word personally doesn't really click that well for me. Some people use the phrase discipline. The term I use in my lexicon is self-regulation. And this essentially means to control yourself, To moderate your desires, To find balance and to avoid excess. Some thinkers believe that no virtue is more important than the other. And to have one means you have the others. They're sort of a collection. They sort of all fit together and stack up against each other. So it's very difficult to truly be just if you have no self-regulation. It's very difficult to be fair if you have no courage. How can you see reality clearly? And then at the same time, Be extremely anxious and in just, Right? They all depend on each other. To have one means you have all. And I like this way of thinking about it. So let's double click on wisdom now, Practical wisdom, Reality literacy. Wisdom in Greek means phronesis. And it's the ability to make sound decisions by understanding what's truly good, What's bad, And what's neither. The Stoics call this indifferent. I've done Stoic talks over the years and people have said, Well, You know, If someone gets attacked, Isn't that bad? It's tricky because the Stoics had their own developed way of perceiving reality and using words and language to assist in that perspective. Different schools of philosophy had sort of different viewpoints on what is good and what is bad. Aristotle believed that yes, Virtue is essential to live a happy life, But it is not in and of itself sufficient. Aristotle distinguished between intrinsic goods, Like virtue, The highest good pursued for its own sake from external or instrumental goods, Like friends, Wealth, Honor, And bodily health, Which are neither virtues nor vices, But necessary conditions for exercising virtues fully. So these externals can enhance or impede eudaimonia, Happiness flourishing, And lacking them entirely, Extreme poverty or isolation, Diminishes opportunities for virtuous action. So in other words, Aristotle believed that virtue excellence is vital, But you also need these other supporting conditions too. The Cynics, On the other hand, Which was a school that Zeno of Kittium studied with before founding Stoicism, Believed that nothing external can lead to virtue, Nothing external is required and in fact should be shunned. You know, You should do away with external goods and luxuries. That will just be a hindrance. The Stoic view is sort of in the middle, Where it's like, Okay, Virtue is primary, But there are natural preferred indifference. We don't need wealth to have virtue, Because you could use wealth to do bad things, But it makes sense that it would be preferred, Seen as we're biological creatures. And so they would say that good in simple terms is excellence of character, Bad would be vice, And nearly anything external would be indifferent, Either preferred or dispreferred. I find this way of phrasing things a bit tricky. So instead, Here's how I would suggest you use the words. I would say there is character good, There is character bad, And then there are conditions. So the Stoics would go through life going, Is this good for my character, Or is this bad for my character? That's how they would describe things. So if someone were to say, You know, There's a bomb that went off in a different country, A Stoic would not say that this is good or bad and make a value judgment on it. They would say, Is this good or bad for my character? Well, I don't know. How can something external be good or bad for my character? How I respond will determine whether it's good or bad for my character. And then the external thing would be a condition. It would be a hard condition, That would be a dispreferred indifferent, Or it would be a helpful condition. So wealth, Helpful condition. Health, Helpful condition. Physical pain, Hard condition. But it's not automatically the case that a condition dictates character good or character bad. So coming back to wisdom, From a Stoic perspective, Seeing the world through the lens of character good, Character bad, And conditions, And also understanding what is up to us and what is not up to us, That is wisdom in action, Seeing clearly. Without wisdom, They believe that you're like a ship without a rudder. You're drifting aimlessly. And wisdom helps you to focus on what you can control, Your thoughts, Your actions, And let go of what you can't, Which is external events. Epictetus said very succinctly, The chief task in life is simply this, To identify and separate matters so that I can say clearly to myself which are externals not under my control. So he says it very simply. If you would like to practice developing wisdom, There are a few simple things you can do. The first thing would be to simply pause before you react. So when you're faced with a tough decision or a tough situation, Just take a moment, Pause, What's in my control? Just that simple question can bring clarity. Now, When you ask that question, What's in my control here? You need to really see it clearly. You need to realize that as tempting as it is to believe that other people are within your control, They're not. So if you're a parent and you're dealing with a child that's being difficult, You ask, What's in my control here? Well, Their reactions are not within your control. It's a condition. What is in your control here is how you act and what you say and what you do. The other thing you can do to practice wisdom is to learn from experience. So reflect, Do journaling on past decisions, What worked, What didn't work. You can do a nightly reflection of the day. What did I do that was character good? What did I do that was character bad? What are the hard and helpful conditions that I had to deal with? And how did I respond to them? Could I respond better next time? And then finally, Just seeking knowledge and applying it and engaging with ideas is something we can benefit from doing every day, Like Socrates did. You know, Read, Ask questions, Challenge your assumptions so you can grow wiser each day. Wisdom is not the static thing you either have or you don't. These virtues are very much forms of knowledge. Take the best spinal surgeon in the world. Does he know spinal surgery? Is it a static thing? He knows it or he doesn't. Well, It depends, You know, In 50 years, Maybe we're gonna know a lot more that he didn't know and he would not be an expert by any measure. That's the way knowledge works. We're always engaging with it, Practicing it, Trying to get better and better understanding of it. We don't just give up and say, We've completed this. The second virtue, Courage or steadfast courage. The Greek term for this is Andrea. And this is not just about physical bravery, You know, Doing scary things. It's about acting according to your principles. The question I like to ask my coaching clients is, Did you act according to your values or your moods? It's a simple question. You will often fall into trouble if you act according to your moods and you disregard your values. But usually when you act according to your values, Regardless of your moods, You end up making good decisions. And this is what courage is about. You act according to your values and principles, Even when you're a bit afraid or there's adversity up ahead. It's about standing firm in the face of life's uncertainties. Courage is super important because in life, You're gonna have curveballs. You're gonna face loss. You're gonna face failure, Criticism. You're going to experience hard conditions, Dispreferred indifference. And courage ensures that we don't crumble and instead we respond with integrity. Marcus Aurelius often faced immense pressure as emperor and yet he wrote in meditations, If it's endurable, Then endure it. Stop complaining. If you wanna practice courage or steadfast courage, You can do three simple things. To begin with, Do the right thing even when it's hard. Just practice that. Even if you get a little bit better at that, That's really good. That's a really good thing for your character. Speak up for what's fair, Even if it risks pushback. The next thing you can do is face your fears incrementally. In my course, Stoic Anxiety Mastery, I have something in there called a fear pyramid where I have my students design a pyramid with the easy fears at the bottom and then the really hard fears at the top. And then you systematically go through each one, Building up. It's a really good exercise. So if you're afraid of public speaking, Fine, Just start really small. Share an idea in a meeting and then you can build from there. And then thirdly, Reframe setbacks. Practice that skill of reframing challenges as opportunities to grow. If we follow the perspective of there is either character good or character bad and everything else is a helpful or hard condition, What you'll see is that the helpful or hard condition part is kind of flexible. It's kind of up to you. So you could say that wealth is a helpful condition, But then at the same time, If you have a period of not much wealth, You could say this is actually helpful. It's helpful to not have that much money right now because now I can practice frugality. Now I can practice saving. Now I can practice understanding the value of having nice things because I don't have them. I can practice poverty. So while we say there are preferred versus dispreferred indifference, There's still a lot of wiggle room in that too. Learning how to reframe and investigate those conditions. Can a hard condition be helpful? Can a helpful condition be hard? Now, Let's talk about justice. So the Greek word for justice is dikaiosine. And it's translated as righteousness or fulfillment of the law. I like the phrase fair dealing. And it's about acting fairly and kindly towards others and ourselves, Recognizing our shared humanity. It's not about legal justice. It's simply about contributing to the common good and treating everyone with respect. Marcus Aurelius said that fair dealing is the source of all other virtues because it ensures your actions benefit society, Not just yourself. Stoics were believers in sympatheia, Which is the concept that we're all interconnected. Classic quote from Marcus Aurelius, What injures the hive injures the bee, He wrote. So now we can start to see what the Stoics meant by virtue. It's a type of excelling as a human being, Acting and thinking in ways that are praiseworthy and honorable, Acting for the common good, Being fair, Doing what's right with steadfast courage, Following your principles, Standing firm, Thinking clearly and logically about life, Understanding what's up to you, What's not up to you, What's going to harm your character, Help your character and how to make use out of conditions, External conditions. So now we're getting closer to what they meant by the virtue of a human being. If you wanna practice justice, Just begin by being fair in your dealings. Wherever you are, Treat others as you want to be treated, That golden rule. Try to give back, Right? Volunteer, Do acts of kindness, Help a friend, Support a cause. Generally just try to give value to people, Give back. And thirdly, Do small acts of kindness, Right? Listen to someone without judging them. It's a small act of kindness. So if your coworker is struggling, This fair dealing, This justice would prompt you to offer help rather than to ignore them. It's about building a better community, One small action at a time. Marcus Aurelius wrote, Do what is just with a kind heart. Bring that to mind if you want to embody the Stoic virtue of justice. It's not about being cold, It's rooted in empathy and goodwill. And the fourth and final cardinal virtue is temperance or self-regulation. Temperance can be translated as sofrosine and it's all about self-control and moderation. Avoid excess in desires, In emotions or actions. Find that golden mean, As Aristotle once described, Between too much and too little. The Buddha had this concept of the middle way, Not being on the extreme in either direction. That balance is temperance, Self-regulation. A human who truly excels as a human being would not need to abstain and they would not need to indulge. They would be able to be fluid, To be able to have that glass of wine and to be able to stop there or to be able to say, I don't want any glasses of wine today. But they would neither feel forced through an unhealthy passion to not have any or to have too much. That's freedom and that's practical wisdom in action. Quite simply, If you don't have self-regulation, You're at the mercy of impulses. Anger, Greed, Overindulgence, All of these things will control you. You'll be a slave to these unhealthy passions. Temperance will help keep you grounded, Ensuring that your choices align with the reason. Seneca advised, You ask what is the proper limit to a person's wealth, First, Having what is essential and second, Having what is enough. If you'd like to practice developing temperance, Say no to excess. Whether it's food, Screen time or spending, Aim for balance. I really like this idea of the 24-hour rule. If you want to buy something or do some kind of activity, Wait 24 hours. This is a way to not get pulled into the emotion. But you can take that principle and apply it to food as well. So if you really crave having dessert, Put a timer on for 30 minutes and then decide. If you want to have more screen time, Say to yourself, Okay, I'll have more screen time in one hour, But first I'll do this other thing. By doing this, You're practicing self-regulation. The second way to develop self-regulation is to manage your emotions. If you feel angry, Take a deep breath before you respond. Temperance prevents rash decisions. And the third thing you can do is to set boundaries. Know your limits and stick to them. For some people, That one glass of wine is going to be too many glasses. That's fine. Certain individuals have a strong predilection for alcohol or other behaviors or substances. Practical wisdom is recognizing this. And temperance or self-regulation is following through with this. And it's all about that balance. So if you have a long day, You might want to binge watch TV until midnight. You don't judge this. You see it. You use prosoke or mindfulness. The executive mind pays attention and creates a steady watch over your thoughts. And then you see that the virtue of self-regulation reminds you to watch one episode and get some rest instead. So let's do a quick recap now. How do you practice the virtue of practical wisdom? Simply pause before you react and ask, What can I control? And then you reflect on your decisions nightly. Simple. To practice steadfast courage, Try to do something that scares you. Try to do that regularly. Follow your values, Not your moods. For self-regulation, Practice habit formation, Set limits on your habits, Try to manage your emotional reactions. When we read about ancient Stoicism, It's easy to get caught in this idea that these are very ancient ideas, But they're not. They're human ideas and they're applicable today. They're timeless tools for living well. So practical wisdom today can help us cut through info overload, Help us focus on what's real and important. We can ignore clickbait news and instead practice fact-checking the information that we come across. Steadfast courage helps us face the uncertainty because this world is full of uncertainty and everything's changing quite quickly. Perhaps if you value steadfast courage, Maybe you'll go for that new job and won't be limited by your fear of failure. When it comes to justice, Perhaps we can focus on coming together and building stronger communities when things can seem so divisive. And we can advocate for fair treatment in a workplace or online, Standing up against bullies. And self-regulation is important because the world is full of excess and distractions. Self-regulation can help us put a limit on doom-scrolling and stay present with our family. To help you in practicing the development of these four Stoic virtues, I recommend doing some morning reflection each day and simply asking, How can I act with more? Insert your chosen virtue. Journal at night, Write down how you've applied the different virtues. Start small, Make this a daily practice, Really build 1% at a time and set up visual reminders, Symbols, Images, Pictures. The more you can really focus on these virtues, The more you're going to be practicing what true Stoicism and true philosophy is about. And as I've said before, The four virtues are interconnected. They work together. You can't have one 100% without also having the others. So acting with fair dealing requires wisdom to know what's fair in the first place. And then you've got to have the courage to stand by it. And then the self-regulation to avoid overreacting. They're all interconnected, Forming a complete system for ethical living. So the aim of Stoicism ultimately is eudaimonia, A flourishing life. And the virtues are the engine, The driving force to help us meet that end. By practicing with these virtues, We align with nature and reason, And we ultimately live a life worth living that is within our control. I encourage you to do a deep dive into this. Really try for the next month to start living according to these virtues and ask the question, What does it mean to excel as a human being in all these areas? What do you like about the Stoic virtues? What do you dislike? What would you change? And don't be a perfectionist here. It's about progress, Small daily steps toward becoming a better version of yourself. I hope you found this deep dive into Stoic virtue useful and enlightening. And I encourage you to live your philosophy. I'll see you next time.

Reviews

Great podcast. It was a nice way to bring many ideas together and fit them into a simplified system to work on everyday.