Hello there.
This is a one hour self-enquiry,
Self-realization practice.
And you can do it either formally sitting or lying down or in any way that's comfortable for you given the length of this practice.
Sitting for an hour like this is a hugely immersive way of practicing and it's very,
Very important to reveal to us the depth of our being.
So please get yourself comfortable.
Eyes can be closed or partially open.
If you need a drink on hand,
Some water or a herbal tea,
That's absolutely fine.
Perhaps put a blanket over your knees and one around your shoulders as we're going to be sitting for quite a long time.
And your blood and your body will pool and your temperature will drop a little.
So make sure you have what you need,
That you're comfortable,
That your phone is switched off and that people know to not disturb you if they can possibly avoid it for this time,
That this time is precious for you and for them.
So allow yourself to feel your feet against the floor.
Just with your felt sense,
Feet and floor.
Filling your ankles,
Your calves and shins,
Your knees,
Quads and thighs,
Buttocks sitting on the zafu or on the floor or against the bed or the mat.
Aware of your lower back,
Middle and upper back,
Right shoulder,
Left shoulder,
Right upper arm,
Left upper arm,
Right forearm and hand,
Left forearm and hand,
Back of the neck,
Back of your head,
Top of your head,
Sides of your head,
Your forehead.
Allow your forehead to be soft,
Being aware of the area that we call the third eye center.
Relaxing the eyes,
Let your cheeks relax,
Let your jaw relax.
Tongue just touching lightly behind the top teeth.
Relaxed in the throat and aware of the throat center.
Feeling the area of your chest,
Being aware of all that feeling there.
Your abdomen.
Can you let your abdomen relax a little bit more?
Your reproductive organs.
Not leaving any part of yourself out.
There is nothing about us that is not sacred.
Aware of your whole body sitting here.
And allowing yourself to become aware of your breath moving your body at the abdomen.
Becoming aware of your breath moving at the heart center.
Becoming aware of the whole motion of the breath.
And of course you are aware of the movement of your mind.
So notice that you notice your mind.
And allow yourself,
In as much as possible,
To be the noticing more than the movement into mind.
If you are very caught up with mind and thoughts then notice that you are caught up with mind and thoughts.
Or if you are distracted,
Notice that you are distracted.
And then be the noticing more than the distraction or the mind.
And aware of your emotions.
And in the same way,
Noticing how you incarnate into your emotional movement.
And not trying to stop that in any way,
But being more the noticing than that movement into the emotions.
Feeling your whole body present.
Awareness of the whole body.
Awareness of your breath.
Awareness of your breath.
And that your breath is in.
And that your heart,
In its whole motion.
Awareness of mind.
Awareness of emotion.
Awareness of your five senses.
You can feel your clothes against your skin.
You can taste the taste in your mouth.
You're aware of the scent of the air in your nostrils.
Light is coming in through your eyes.
Sounds in the room.
Sounds in your own body.
Sounds from outside.
The sound of my voice.
And notice that each sense leads directly into consciousness.
And then the mind makes a label or a judgment to notice this movement too.
And as much as possible,
Rest back to that first meeting of sensation and consciousness.
That purity,
That space.
And just very gently.
Bringing a little more attention to your breath moving at your heart.
Feeling the physical area of your heart.
The emotion that's there.
Feeling the space in the physicality of your heart.
Feeling the space between the emotions.
Between emotion and consciousness.
Following that space back.
We're going to very gently drop in some questions.
Almost as if we're dropping stones into water.
And we see the stone go down through the clear water and the ripples move outwards.
And we're not looking to trigger the mind or our feelings.
Not looking to strip away ego or change ourselves.
We're just asking into presence.
Simply witnessing the question and its deeper movement.
Neither grasping for an answer.
Not trying to understand anything.
This process is called self-inquiry.
And so as gently as possible,
Ask yourself.
Who am I?
Am I my body?
Am I my thoughts?
Am I the feeling?
Am I the feelings I have?
Am I my mind?
Am I the sum of all I have learned in school and college and university?
Am I my health or my health situation?
Am I the stress or anxiety I sometimes have?
Am I my finances,
My money?
Am I my bank balance,
My earning capacity?
Am I my house or my city,
My town,
My village?
Am I my relationships?
Am I the child of my parents?
Am I my creativity?
Am I my job?
Am I my past?
Am I my thoughts for the future?
Am I only complete if I do my meditation or yoga or say my mantra or do my sadhana each day?
Am I the sum of all the things that have happened to me?
Am I the name that I was given?
Am I my stories?
Am I my religious beliefs?
Am I a spiritual person?
Am I my politics and beliefs?
Am I an assemblage of culture and ideas?
Am I the country that I was born into?
Am I my sexuality?
Am I my gender identity?
Am I my ambition or ideals?
Am I my goals?
Am I my dreams?
Am I here in this moment?
Am I my future?
And so,
Just let go of any thought,
Of any question.
Let go of the concept of self-inquiry.
Just the feeling of being present.
If you need a sip of water or tea,
That's okay.
You can move within meditation.
If you need to switch your legs over,
Rearrange your blanket,
Just do so with love,
With kindness.
If mind has taken over,
If something has been stirred up by these questions,
Just recognize and acknowledge what's there.
Rest into the awareness of the noticing.
Be aware of your feet on the floor,
Weight on the seat,
Your back rising up,
Your five senses operating.
And that first meeting of sensory feedback and consciousness,
Which is silent and pure.
And now we've been sitting for a good while.
Perhaps you feel a little bit stiller,
A little more present.
Let go of any idea of meditation that you have,
Of trying to achieve anything with this practice.
Any idea that we have like that is just something in the mind that keeps us from experiencing the truth of this moment.
And it's meeting the truth of this moment that is meditation,
That is the truth of yourself.
Not meeting with judgment or criticism,
Simply being here.
Fully here in your body.
And just very gently bringing your awareness to what we sometimes call the third eye center.
And not looking for anything there,
But perhaps just feeling a sense of energy at that place.
And however that feels for you,
That's how it is.
Just the feeling,
Perhaps of life,
Of energy at the third eye center.
Not concentrating.
Not focusing.
No pressure.
And as you rest here,
You may notice either sound or light within the body.
Sometimes there's a sensation of light,
Almost as if the sun is shining on us from outside.
But this feeling of light is the inner light within.
But whatever it is you're experiencing,
Just feel the peace of the space within you.
Space in your bones,
Space in your flesh,
Space between the thoughts,
Space between the feelings.
Space between the breath,
The wholeness of space within.
Light moving within darkness.
If you hear inner sounds or inner music,
Then simply listen to the space within those sounds,
Behind those sounds.
If you feel a sense of inner light,
See the inner light.
And be aware of the space within the light.
And just continuing to rest here.
Thank you for listening.
Thank you for listening.
Thank you for listening.
And just letting that go.
And coming to the sense of the wholeness in you that is yourself,
That says,
I am that feeling of pure being within yourself.
The I am that you are.
And so for the next 15 to 20 minutes of this practice,
We will rest in silence with just the feeling of the I am.
I am here with you.
But should you need to have a drink,
Move your legs,
If you get caught in mind or feeling simply coming back to the senses and the spaces and the feeling of being and uniqueness within yourself.
Not creating anything with the mind or sense of identity.
Just feeling that part of you that says,
I am.
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