Interview With Bob Nickman- Exploding Human Podcast

Jenny chats with Bob Nickman: kundalini awakening, childhood spiritual influences, destiny versus free will, spontaneous past life memory and recovery from CFS (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome). They also ponder do we have free will or destiny? Soul or ego?

Transcript

Are you curious about discovering ways of making your life better?

Then welcome to my podcast.

I'm Bob Nickman and this is The Exploding Human.

Listen in while I talk with all kinds of people in the fields of personal growth,

Health and healing,

Alternative therapies,

Psychology,

Spirituality,

Environment and the future.

I'm looking for those answers that make life better for everyone.

You'll meet cutting edge practitioners,

Doctors,

Artists,

Filmmakers,

Business people and those who have overcome challenges.

The brave,

The curious,

Anyone who is out there helping us humans to explore,

Expand and explode.

Hey,

Welcome to The Exploding Human.

My name is Bob Nickman.

Today through the magic of the internet,

We go just outside Glasgow,

Scotland to talk to Jenny Light.

She is a psychologist,

An author and a teacher of meditation and yoga.

So my guest today,

As I said,

Is Jenny Light.

And you have to listen a little more carefully if you're an American because there's a Scottish accent happening,

But I understood everything.

And she is an absolute delight.

We talk about many things in the realm of meditation,

Consciousness,

Spirituality,

And we talk about her two books.

The first book she wrote is about how she healed herself from chronic fatigue syndrome.

That book is called Living Lightly,

A journey through chronic fatigue syndrome.

And she's just released her newest book,

Awakening the Lotus of Peace.

And we get to talk about that and how our world is changing for the better,

Despite some of the many challenges that we have.

Jenny is a delightful person.

I loved talking to her and I think you will love listening to her.

This is Jenny Light.

Today we travel to Glasgow,

Near Glasgow,

To talk with Jenny Light.

And here she is.

I can see her.

She is smiling.

She's in a great place.

So what time is it there now?

About six,

Five,

Six o'clock at night?

Because,

Yeah,

It's six in the evening.

Yeah.

So I'm at 10 in the morning.

So,

Oh,

We're in different time zones,

Different times of the day.

Yet through the miracle of the Internet,

We can connect and have a conversation about all things meditation,

Spirituality,

Kundalini.

I want to know,

You know,

You hear the word Kundalini and I don't even really know what that means fully.

I mean,

I know it's a type of yoga,

But it's something else.

Can we start with that?

Yeah.

I mean,

When we were talking prior to the beginning of the show,

I was talking about my childhood.

My childhood was,

Well,

I feel unique.

I mean,

There's lots of people look at unique childhoods,

But for me,

It was recurring expanded states of awareness when I was aged five,

Six.

You know,

I can relate that to the fact that we moved house when I was seven and all this was happening before I was seven.

So I mean,

That's how I can age myself in it.

And I had no words to describe this great power that would come sturging up my spine and until I felt this expanded as the room and I turned the room blue.

It was usually at night that it happened and it would be spontaneous.

I would have no words to describe it.

And while there's great,

There was a sound that went with it,

This great thrumming sound.

But in this expanded state,

I couldn't move my physical body.

I was in this different state of being and then it would receipt this heat would receive back down the spine.

And then I was able to move the body again.

And as a child,

I didn't have words to say to people what was happening,

You know,

But this sort of thing that I knew as an adult was the Kundalini experience.

And it recurred quite a few times during I did a spiritual healing training course when I was in my 20s.

That was in the 80s.

And this same experience whenever I worked with energy,

This same experience would search up the spine.

And it usually meant at that time that I ended up flaked out on the floor with the world spinning round about me.

I wasn't able to kind of manage or control it.

I don't think you can really control it,

But certainly you become used to become in that state so that you can function.

But I've spoken to lots and lots of people who have had similar Kundalini awakening experiences and I've got a blog on my website,

Living-likely.

Co.

Uk,

That is lots of people communicate with me about their own difficult to manage Kundalini awakenings,

But they're all punctuated by a sense of not being able to operate right in the world in the same way as those people that operate in a three third dimensional reality and how they relate to the world.

It's how you used to relate,

But you can't do that anymore because you're operating in a different paradigm,

But it comes and goes until you've got some control over it or until you've made the changes in your body,

Until you're operating.

This is,

I haven't got really words to describe this.

This is all experiential.

This is not because I've read stuff on it.

This is all how I'm experiencing it.

Now I'm a kick in the shirt of 60.

I can be in that expanded state and still operate now.

I can communicate.

I can operate in the world,

But that wasn't how it was at the beginning.

So there was quite a lot of shifting of realities and learning to fade into that experience in my thirties,

My twenties and thirties.

Yeah.

I've read about this experience.

I have not had it.

I've had what I would call spine tingling experiences,

But not what I've read about the power of the Kundalini experience emanating from the base of the spine up,

I think is how it was described in some literature that I read.

And you said,

This is interesting to me that as a child,

You had an experience that you couldn't describe to other adults around.

I think we all have that connection to something bigger.

However,

That is experience as a kid.

And I had the same thing.

I thought I was the only one that knew it or that felt it.

And that wasn't exactly what you're describing,

But I remember thinking,

I got to keep this a secret because no one's going to really understand it because no one ever talked about it.

And so I kind of kept it to myself and it didn't happen a lot,

But once in a while.

I think we inherently know when something is precious and private,

We know when something's precious and we contain it within ourselves because spiritual truths that come to us,

You know,

These insights and I'm not necessarily meaning Kundalini,

But spiritual insights that we garner are leaked away.

We're like become the kasiv if we just tell it to all in sundry.

The things that are meant to be kept precious and private and contained within the heart,

You know,

They are our soul truths.

I love that expression,

Precious and private.

That's really a good way to put it.

It's not secretive.

It's precious.

It's precious more than it is secretive.

Did you have any relatives or people near you that you felt understood this at all or you were just a unique kid?

Yes,

Indeed.

In my Scottish Presbyterian school,

I think I was the only kid in the class that wasn't christened because my mother and father believed that I should make my own choice and they were christened,

But they were busy exploring Buddhism,

Hinduism.

I don't know if you've heard of the Findhorn community up in the north of Scotland.

Can you spell that for me?

Findhorn,

F-I-N-D and then Horn,

H-O-R-N.

No,

I've never heard of that.

Okay,

Something I learned today.

It was a kind of hippie community that developed in the 60s and they built.

It was Eileen Caddy that had conversations with God telling her to build this community on this patch of sand.

It's sand dunes really at the edge of this town,

The Findhorn town,

And a whole community is built up there now.

I mean,

There's thousands of people all in this community,

But my mother and father were there at the very beginning.

I don't mean to say they lived there,

But they visited a lot and they encouraged us to think for ourselves and also to have a religious inquiry.

I remember when I was in school and I was seven and the teacher was doing this religious education lesson.

It was a whole lesson on what do you think God looks like?

And everybody was saying,

I think he's an old man,

He sits on a throne and he's got this on,

He's got a robe,

And he's got a really long beard.

And I was inside,

I was like,

No,

No,

No,

No,

No.

And then she gave us the crayons and the paper.

I got a yellow crayon,

Which was the closest to the gold I could see in my head.

And I did big rays of light coming out from the centre,

I covered the page in gold.

It was just a yellow crayon,

But to me it was the nearest to gold.

And I was out in two seconds at her desk and she said,

What's that?

I said,

It's God.

And she said,

No,

It's not.

I said,

Yes it is.

God isn't a person,

God is light.

And her face opened and shut a few times,

Like her mouth.

She had nothing to say.

She said,

Oh well,

Just go and draw something else.

But that was the start of your challenge and authority.

It's like,

No,

All the things that are being taught,

We have no concept of God.

God is so all encompassing that to have,

To try and contain that in the persona of God was a human.

God is so infinite and vast that light is the greatest or sound is the greatest that we have to meeting that great presence.

I challenge authority on various occasions because we were taught to think for ourselves.

And I found that really,

You know,

Really invaluable.

I'm so deeply grateful for that as from a childhood.

I love your parents.

I have to say just for that alone,

That is a beautiful thing to teach a child.

You have siblings?

And did you say us?

Yeah,

I was the eldest.

Are they similar to you?

No.

No.

Okay.

No,

They're given the choice of going vegetarian.

And I just knew it was the right thing to do for ages.

Like for a couple of years,

My mom was cooking a meat meal and a vegetarian meal until we all went vegetarian.

But we were given choice and I like that.

I like it too.

One of the things I've told my kids over the years is one of the most limiting things you can do and probably destructive things is to live your life to please other people and to think for yourself.

And if you're pleasing somebody else,

That means you're probably not pleasing yourself.

And it's really,

You know,

It's a rough way to go because you find yourself feeling uncomfortable a lot for reasons that don't need to be there.

And unless that pleasing other people is inherently within your soul nature,

You know,

As something that you want to do because pleasing other people and helping other people makes us all feel good.

It's our soul course as opposed to the ego course.

You know,

There's a fine balance in that.

But yeah,

I think maybe hit on the word destiny here.

Right.

Do we have destiny?

That's a question I've been pondering for a while because the older I get,

The less destiny I actually think we have,

You know,

The lack or the less shall I say,

There's less free will and at the same time less destiny.

It's as if there's perhaps no real plan for us.

Although I do know that there are certain trends that we have in life.

We can look back and see that things happened and that was influential on the next things coming.

But it's an open question.

What do you think?

Destiny or free will?

I think we come in a certain way.

When we're born,

I think there's a certain amount of genetics and that are there.

And I think there's a history of family history and ethnic history.

I think all that stuff lives in the cells and DNA and some of that comes through the ages.

But I also think that we do have to make certain choices.

We get to experience things and then we vibrate with them or we don't.

And if we vibrate with them and we're honest about that and we go down those paths,

That is,

If you want to call that destiny or just intuition or just following truth,

There's a lot of.

.

.

That part,

I think,

Is sort of.

.

.

Do you ever have a thing where you go,

I always knew that I would ever have a corporate job?

Let's put it that way.

It just never appealed to me.

Even when I was a kid and I'd see men and women in suits going to office buildings,

I was like,

I'm not doing that.

Didn't even know what it was.

It just didn't feel right.

And then I would see people that were older than me and they were a little more freer and loose and fun.

I was like,

That's the kind of person I want to be.

And I didn't have to ask.

I felt like you were talking about that teacher telling you how to think.

Sometimes I would question it out loud and sometimes I would just say it inside myself and I'm not doing that.

And I don't know what the difference is between someone that is malleable to authority and someone that is willing to say,

That doesn't ring true to me and I'm not going to do that.

Whatever that resource is,

Whether that is just there and it isn't beaten out of you,

And I'm not saying physically beaten,

But societally beaten out of you or not,

I don't know what that difference is,

But I think that I'll put it this way.

Let me put it this way.

Now,

You really got me going on this.

Thank you for that.

It's a great one.

I know,

I don't feel it.

I know that I've been here before.

This is not the first round.

And I've talked about this in my podcast before,

But when I was born,

I had an experience that I always remembered and what it was,

Was going from this very dark place,

But not negative dark,

Just dark,

No light.

And this tremendous surge of energy being transported to a new place.

It was like,

I don't know how it was like a,

Like a whoosh or some kind of noise I can't do because it was a silent noise,

But a noise nonetheless.

And the first feeling was,

This is really scary because it was so powerful.

And then there was an inner laugh,

An inner laugh and the phrase,

Oh yeah,

This again.

And I liked it.

I was like,

Oh yeah,

I'm going to do this again.

And I laughed.

It was like big laughter,

Internal laughter.

And so I always remembered that experience.

Is this,

This is your prenatal?

Either prenatal or I just always took it as my birth.

So it could have been the moment of conception because there's several camps that think that that actually at the moment of conception,

Lots of salt,

There's a great light in the ethers and lots of souls that are compatible make a great rush to get there.

I mean,

It could have been the point of conception or it could have been birth,

But that's very interesting because most people don't remember that right back to that moment.

Yeah,

I didn't tell anybody that for a long time.

And then I was like,

Wait a minute,

I'm going to talk about this with,

You know,

When I feel like safe enough to do it.

Now I don't care at all,

But,

And I just,

I mentioned it.

I don't know who I mentioned it to.

I don't even know if I ever told my parents.

I don't think I did,

But you know,

That's a powerful thing.

And I had,

I had a,

I had this girlfriend when I was in college and she said,

You know,

When I see you walking down the street,

You seem like,

How did she put it?

Like there's something about,

Something in your eyes that you,

That you are an old soul or something like that,

That you've been here a lot.

There's like a knowing.

And I didn't take it as like an egotistical thing on my side,

But she just said it.

I didn't ask her about it.

I didn't bring it up.

It was just,

She said it to me and I was thinking like,

Oh,

Okay,

Well,

So maybe that is the case.

Maybe I've been here so many times that I don't know.

I mean,

I've certainly veered from that feeling a lot as a human,

You know,

Done a lot of human stuff that were not very wise.

I'll say that.

Do you remember any of your previous lives?

Yeah,

Only because I've done hypnotic,

Hypnotherapy,

Past life regression.

Yes,

I've done three of them.

So I do remember.

I haven't done any of like hypnotic stuff,

But spontaneous memory.

That I have not had.

And I don't mean to say like,

Like it's a thought concept.

I mean to say that it's,

You're in it,

You're in it.

You can feel what it felt like in that time.

You can always smell the smells,

Hear the sights,

Sounds that you're,

You're immersed in the feeling of that.

And also the weight of the role that you had in that time.

That's how it is for me.

They just spontaneously pop in and the kind of most recurring one has been,

And this was from a child,

I would be sitting,

This is,

I could only take to a past life memory,

But I'd be sitting cross legged in a kind of robe and gazing down this valley,

That kind of jungle valley to hills in the distance,

But I'd be sitting meditating and just knew in my self that it was India.

At that time I hadn't actually been to India,

But I just knew that that was me in India.

It was the way it felt.

It was so embedded,

So grounded in it.

I totally get that.

I mean,

A lot of people might hear this and go,

These people are strange,

But we are.

Well,

We're stranger even than we can possibly conceive.

As long as you're putting a human consciousness into it,

You won't be able to conceive quite how amazing the universe and life really is.

It's only through meditation and moving into higher states of awareness and the insight that comes with them.

The human brain can't possibly,

And the human mind can't be elastic enough.

It can only imagine,

But it can't possibly know.

It's only in the expanded states that we move into a state of knowing.

Yeah,

That's my experience is that you can't really put words to it,

But it's certainly worth pursuing and the amount of time I spend meditating,

Which is daily,

Is super valuable to me.

It's like food.

It is food to me.

The days I miss doing meditation and miss that time,

They don't feel as good and they don't feel as right.

I feel like I've almost,

This is probably too strong of a word.

I feel like I've almost betrayed myself.

Yeah,

I'm totally on the same page.

That's exactly how I feel.

And I'd rather go without a meal than miss meditation.

You write about food,

It is food.

It's when we come into our true selves and we're feeding on the cosmic rays,

We are feeding.

We're being our true selves in that moment.

And then we have to act in the world again because we're in a human form.

We're here to do a job,

Whatever that job.

I think we've all got primary agendas and maybe secondaries that we came into this world to work through,

To learn,

To grow.

Some of us have got world rules that are really going to be influential in the new worlds that's coming.

And I think that our meditation is the most important thing that we do.

It's more important than any of the earthly things.

And you teach meditation.

I know that's part of what you do.

How do you approach that when you have new students?

What is the beginning for people?

Well,

I teach new students about coming to quiet within the body and being aware of the spine as an upright column of light.

So I get them to kind of imagine that they're looking down that column of light and spine.

You know,

We're talking about the astral spine here,

Which occupies the same sort of space as the physical spine.

For a beginner,

It's all about learning to sit still,

To use the breath as your vehicle.

So your breath is the bridge between the physical and your astral body,

Your more expanded states of consciousness.

The breath is the vehicle of which we then make that transition.

I teach them how to do simple yoga breaths.

They're not complicated.

It's more about being mindful within an extended exhale.

Mostly the people that come to me are people that are a wee bit more experienced.

And I just allow the universe to send the people that want to come.

I don't do big advertising programs.

People just contact me at the Glue when the time's right and allow the universe just to.

.

.

I see the universe in a sort of hippie way of talking about God and all that is.

I just allow things to come to me.

And I think that it doesn't have any effort then,

Bob.

Yeah,

It's a very simple concept again,

Which is if you change your inner life,

Expand your inner life,

Then your outer life changes automatically without very much effort at all.

Where I'm vibrating a certain way,

I'm attracting or even repelling certain other types of energies that don't.

.

.

It just doesn't sync up.

Which brings me to something that I read in your bio that you sent was that you do some sound healing with tuning forks.

Yes.

A lot of the tuning forks are inaudible unless they come close to your ear and then you can hear their thrumming.

You can hear it,

But a lot of them are inaudible.

And then they're placed on the body and you can feel that vibration coming through.

A lot of people actually can't tolerate because of different bodily disabilities like osteoporosis.

You can't put the forks on the body because it's too powerful,

But you can work on the aureic field and people go away without having any psychotherapy or any invasive treatments and they go away and something's cleared from them.

Something's cleared physically,

Something's cleared energetically.

You can hear the discord.

It's really interesting because when I'm working with the tuning forks around the body,

I can feel where,

I feel stroke here when I go through an area of density.

So when I'm doing the kind of clearing around the body to start off with,

I can feel and hear where I'm meant to go and where I'm meant to start.

And it's only afterwards somebody will say,

Oh yes,

I have had trouble with that knee for a while or you know,

I've had trouble with that digestion.

I'd never really thought to see.

But you can clear an awful lot out of the body and it's just pure sound.

It's so powerful.

It's very profound treatment.

I find it fascinating and I don't know,

I keep getting drawn to it in some way that I feel like I need to learn more about it.

And I don't know if there's something stopping me.

Some sort of a fear of making a commitment to something that may not work or something like that,

Even though I know it does.

No,

It does work.

But what I'm intuiting,

You know,

Picking up from what you're saying there that maybe,

Right,

I'm putting a question out there to you Bob.

Maybe in a past life you did work with sound,

Right?

Then there's a fear because you maybe got persecuted for working with sound.

Well,

I played.

.

.

Just to see if that resonates.

Well even in this life,

I played in bands for a bunch of years and made no money.

It was a rough,

It was a rough,

It was a great time,

Really fun,

But it sort of ended with like,

I'm not doing,

I'm glad I'm not doing that anymore.

It could be this life.

This is not playing in bands.

I don't know,

You know,

But I'll think about that.

How long did it take you to sort of become adept at using the tuning forks?

It's fairly recent.

So I learned the tuning forks roughly about 2014.

Oh,

Okay.

And I was resistant to taking on any modality apart from teaching yoga,

Teaching meditation and spiritual healing.

That was all,

I was like,

I don't want to be Jack of all trades and master of none,

But I was so drawn to sound.

In fact,

I'll tell you why I'm drawn to sound.

When I was in Peru,

2003,

And when I was in Machu Picchu,

Way up there in the Andes mountains,

They've got all of these temples.

I mean,

It's a site of temples and they've got one particular temple that's open to the people.

It doesn't,

It never had a roof and it's got these trapezoidal recesses,

Right?

Which if you hum and,

You know,

Just make sound into these recesses,

They are about six foot wide at the bottom and narrower at the top.

And it kind of intuitively came to me that this was a hospital and that people would lie down on these ledges and sound would be played to them because the resonance,

See if you hummed into that recess,

The sound would come back,

It would amplify,

It would incredible waves of sound in that one area.

And later on that trip,

I had a sound healing station.

So it was a whole bunch of us all lying on the ground.

And it was traditional instruments,

Like so the Nazca pipes and flutes and all these other things and drums and the shaman went round and vibrated the sound over the top of us.

Well,

I mean,

That was so incredibly powerful.

I mean,

I've never had a sound healing.

That was the first time.

And I was like,

Oh my goodness,

There's really something in sound.

And I found myself weeping and I had a spontaneous past life awareness of myself in a deerskin dress.

And I was picking herbs and putting them in a little bag.

And I was the healer for the tribe.

I was obviously in North America,

But I was the healer for the tribe.

And in that tribe,

I was revered and I knew the name of every single plant and its medicinal properties.

And I was crying because I don't have that knowledge in this life.

I think that that type of knowledge was just commonplace,

Probably pre medical pharmacology and all that stuff that we've mutated into.

And when you think about that,

People healed each other and help and heal themselves with plants that grew on the ground.

It's pretty interesting stuff that that has just it is coming back again.

In certain ways.

I'm sure the pharmacology industry doesn't love that.

But it is.

Well,

There's something to heal whatever ailment you've got and you don't have to walk very far.

There'll be something even in cities,

There's tenacious reeds coming up through the sidewalk and there's going to be something that's going to be healing benefit,

Not very far from where you live.

There's something everywhere.

You don't have to get heard from South America or something from Africa.

There'll be something on your local area.

And we did all know that knowledge at one point.

But in this life,

I only know rudiments.

I've only got wee bits that my mum taught me.

So dandelions are really good for urinary tract infections.

You know,

Their nettles are good for giving it an iron tomic,

But also,

You know,

Just a feel good whatever you're needing.

Various other ones like we call it sticky willy,

But it's cleavers is its real name.

It's like goose,

It's other names,

But it's like little balls like velcro that stick on your clothes.

Do you have them at that in America?

You're not talking about cotton are you?

No,

No,

No.

I'm talking about it's a plant.

It's about three feet high.

I'm sure we do.

It grows as a weed and it's got like velcro on its long thin leaves and velcro on its little ball seeds.

And that's how it disperses its seeds.

But it's great for cleaning the lymphatic system.

So you pick it and put it in hot water.

Then,

You know,

You're clearing the lymph,

Clearing the liver,

Clearing toxins.

Okay.

I love the name sticky willy.

I know it's terrible.

It just sounds good.

It just sounds,

Especially the way you say it.

Sticky willy.

So now that we're talking about healing,

Look at these great segues I'm pulling off here today.

We're talking about healing.

I know I read in your bio again that you had chronic fatigue syndrome and that you were able to heal yourself.

From that,

How did you get it,

Do you think?

And how did you heal yourself?

It's fascinating to me that I know a number of people that have had it just because of lifestyle and stress and diet and all these other factors.

But what was your story?

I worked on a high energy tariff.

I was always pushing myself.

I always had this feeling like right from a child that there's an awful lot to be done in this life.

We can't fanny about and wait.

It's like there's no time like the present.

Let's do it now.

So I was always push,

Push,

Push.

Whatever I wanted to do,

An idea in my head,

I was up out of the seat and getting on with it right there and then.

That's the kind of person I am.

There's no provocation.

It's just right at it.

I was a teacher,

So I was in education for about 20 years.

And in 2010,

I hit a wall because I'd been taking a two year secondment to teach.

My specialism was teaching reading.

So I was doing this closing the literacy gap in secondary schools.

So that's from age 12 and above where there were still some kids that were a reading age of under nine years.

So you really,

To be literate in society,

You need to have a reading age of nine in order to fill in forms and whatever.

But some were under that.

And in secondary,

They're just sort of immersed in the curriculum that doesn't teach them reading.

So my job was to go in and do testing,

Take out kids that needed work and train up teachers over a 12 week block.

So there was a teacher's,

Secondary teachers were trained in the reading methods.

And then I kept that school going and moved on to the next one.

So there were nine secondary schools in the authority and I was to get around them all.

But the ninth one I was burnt out because I was still supporting the other eight schools.

Anyway,

Whatever.

I got burnt out in 2010.

And I remember when,

I couldn't understand why,

Exactly what was happening.

But I remember this particular morning,

I sat on the edge of the bed and I looked at my face in the mirror and I was ashen.

I was grey.

I couldn't even recognize the face imprint of me.

It just didn't look,

It didn't look bright and light that,

You know,

My usual self.

Didn't look like me.

It looked like all of the life had gone out of me.

And I sat there and I couldn't process what order to put my clothes on.

I couldn't work out what came in what order,

Right,

From the under way out.

I couldn't work it out.

There's something not right.

There's something not right.

But I drove,

I drove to the school that day and then I ended up bursting into tears because I couldn't work out what I was meant to be doing.

And I got sent home.

But that was it.

I went in and out of teaching for another year or so.

But,

You know,

Anyway,

I got a diagnosis of chronic fatigue syndrome.

And when I heard that,

My mother's a healer,

By the way,

And she used to have loads of people that came to her with chronic fatigue syndrome or ME.

And I knew that how life changing it was.

So when I heard that diagnosis,

I started crying because I thought,

Oh,

No,

That means I'm not able to do anything anymore.

And as we've kind of talked before about how important meditation is,

And that's my big thing.

You know,

I thought if I can't even get the energy to do that,

You know,

What's the point in being here?

I'm not seeing this in a suicidal way.

It's just like,

I was like,

Oh,

No,

This is terrible.

But I mean,

A week of like lying on bed with the room spinning around and I thought,

No,

I'm not a victim.

This is not,

This label is not going to define me.

How can this label possibly define me?

You know,

It's not me.

I'm not this body.

That label is not me.

And I'm a there boy resolved to get myself better.

So it involved five hours a day lying on the bed,

Like looking at the light.

I was sort of drinking in the sunlight with my eyes until after five hours of lying prone,

I was able to do something later on in the day,

Some small task before retiring back to bed.

And I changed my diet entirely.

Now,

I was always like vegetarian,

So I was eating very well.

I didn't eat very much processed foods.

But I decided I would do 100% raw diet.

And you know,

Within a fortnight of eating raw food,

I had incredible energy.

I was like,

I was back to,

You know,

Zingy,

Jenny light again.

Lots of energy.

And I took,

This is in my book,

Living Lightly,

A Journey Through Chronic Fatigue Syndrome in ME.

But basically,

In a nutshell,

It was through positive thinking,

I.

E.

I,

This doesn't define me,

Changing my diet to raw food,

Meditating in like one minute,

Two minute,

Five minute bursts,

Because that was all I could concentrate for before the brain.

I couldn't process language.

It was people,

Their mouths were moving.

I couldn't understand what they were seeing.

It was that bad.

Positive thinking,

Raw food,

Meditation,

Spiritual healing.

I went to a friend who was a spiritual healer.

My sister ran me out there once a week and I got zapped by spiritual healing.

That really boosted my energy.

You know,

He didn't do anything except just walk around being lay hands,

You know,

On me or around me.

And I went out feeling,

You know,

A million dollars.

And the fifth thing was Omega's,

It's a product called Veg EPA.

Now,

I don't sell the stuff or have nothing to do with the company.

I'm just telling people because it works.

By a company called Igenis,

It's very high end extracted omega 3,

6 and 9.

The one that normal processes don't get to because it's too rough a process.

I'll just say that it worked,

You know,

Four a day for the first week,

Down to two a day the second week and then one a day for,

You know,

A couple of years.

And that healed my phrasal nerves in the brain.

You know,

The synapses become,

There's something denudes of,

This is only what I'm to it,

But there's something denudes of the actual nerves in the brain itself.

And so for anybody else out there,

That's my five-pronged approach to healing yourself from chronic fatigue,

But you have to be prepared to rest.

That's an amazing story.

And I would recommend reading her book,

Living Lightly.

That's the title of the book.

Yeah,

Living Lightly,

A Journey Through Chronic Fatigue Syndrome ME.

That was my first book.

The interesting thing about this,

You know,

There is a short period of time that we're alive and we want to get things done,

Which you sort of rode that train really hard and seem to ignore the other side,

Which is,

You know,

The dichotomy of being a human being of rest and connection with something else.

And it's so easy to just go one way or the other and to lose the balance.

Seems like you have it now.

You know,

You're writing books,

You're also meditating,

You're doing both things,

You know.

I always meditated,

But also then pushed myself hard.

And I knew that,

Sorry,

I'll not say I knew,

I know now that what I was pushing with was the ego self rather than the higher concept of the soul self.

I was pushing with that and that was what burnt me out.

I always wonder about that,

The ego pushing for getting things done,

Accomplishment,

Even the term legacy,

Which I find can be just an ego driven thing too.

It's an odd balance or an odd sort of,

Not odd is not the right word.

It can be confusing to ask yourself,

Am I doing this for service to other human beings or am I doing this to be recognized and to be considered amazing in some way?

I totally agree.

And I think that until you have grown as a spiritual being,

Until you've grown to recognize when and the multifarious ways in which the ego dupes us into thinking that I'm doing this and I'm doing this because it's the righteous thing to do.

And that could be for the benefit of other people.

But as you rightly pointed out,

There's also the ego getting its sneaky wee pat on the back.

It's getting its recognition.

It's getting a claim,

I've done the right thing.

I've been a good girl here.

So I'm getting the putting up a pedestal part of the ego self really loves that.

Yeah.

Competitive righteousness.

I win.

I think the path through it all is to meditate,

To meditate more,

Just keep meditating.

Even if you're not getting much in the way of inroads,

Just keep meditating because it quantifiably changes you over a period of time.

Well,

I have days where it works really well and I feel amazing and connected and calm and energetic at the same time.

Then I have other days where my mind is just all over the place.

It cracks me up sometimes.

Like,

Did I just actually think that?

That is just so off.

But I try not to judge it,

But I'm intrigued.

I try to say to people when the mind throws in something like that,

Then that's not you.

That random interrupting thought,

Whatever it might have been,

Is not you.

That's quite clearly the ego self flinging in something,

Which is a span of in the works to your meditation practice or your meditation progress and to see it for what it is and just say,

Well,

That isn't me.

I really like that,

That it isn't me.

If it's you,

You'll know it because it's joyful,

It's happiness,

It gives a sense of peace and calmness.

You'll know when it's yourself as in the soul self because it has this bammy feeling of goodness that comes with it.

Whereas the ego self is only interested in tripping all that up.

It's got a vested interest because the ego will disappear.

It will cease to be,

It will be swallowed up if the soul self becomes too manifest or realized,

Shall we say.

I'm just taking that in.

I really.

.

.

That's fine.

I had somebody say to me once,

It confused me,

Completely confused me.

It doesn't now because it's basically what you just said,

But they said to me,

You're not your story.

And I'm like,

What do you mean?

I mean,

These things that happened to me,

That is me.

No,

It isn't.

And I was like,

Well,

What is?

And it's what you just said.

And I do have events that have happened,

Obviously,

And they've influenced me,

But it isn't necessarily the me that you're talking about or the you that you're talking about.

Yes.

Can people,

You have a website,

Correct?

People can find you and.

.

.

Yes,

It's living-lightly.

Co.

Uk.

It's living dot.

.

.

If they just look up Jenny Light yoga meditation.

Yeah,

Do that folks.

I'll pretty much come up there.

My new book,

It's a new book of yoga meditations called Awakening the Lotus of Peace.

This is the search for inner peace within.

So it's really in a nutshell how to meditate using the yoga breath,

Using intention and find that inner peace within.

And again,

As I said previously,

I try and keep everything in simple terms that is very clear and concise.

I don't believe in flowery language when one word will do,

But it's beautifully illustrated with mandalas throughout.

Oh,

Yes.

That is a beautiful picture.

That alone is.

.

.

I've just opened it,

Chapter four.

It's called Opening to Receive the Rays of Peace.

So this chapter has got the idea that not only are we peace within,

But we're actually immersed in peace.

And we were talking earlier about drinking,

Like meditation is like food.

We are drinking in those rays of peace,

Being open to receive.

If we're a closed vessel,

Then we have no opportunity to drink that in.

We come so tight and enclosed within,

Particularly in the heart.

But basically all of the chakras,

We can become tight and not open to receive.

And it's by opening to say,

Well,

I choose to be open to life and to all of its opportunities.

And we're talking here about the highest possibilities coming to us.

And the meditation in that chapter four is about opening to these rays of peace and drinking them in to awaken,

To start to awaken that peace within our own heart,

Our own inherent state of being.

Beautiful.

You're doing what you're doing.

It's a beautiful thing.

More people doing what we're doing and trying to do will make for a more peaceful world.

Yeah,

But this is the way the world's going,

Bob.

We were talking about earlier about things that we couldn't say before when we were children,

Because it wasn't the right environment.

You would have got ridiculed.

You might even go like sectioned,

You know,

It's mathematically sectioned.

You'd hold your way kicking and screaming in a straight jacket in the olden days.

But things are coming into the open now.

I don't feel like I'm an oddball anymore.

I don't know about you.

Sorry,

I don't mean to call you an oddball.

No,

I know what you're saying.

I felt that I stuck out like a sore thumb.

You know,

I was different from everybody else.

But then maybe everybody else feels that too.

You know,

We're allowed to be different.

Well,

I think people are afraid to be different too,

Because they,

You know,

Who wants to be teased and made fun of or ostracized?

You know,

That happens a couple of times when you're young.

You just go,

I'm not I'm keeping that a secret.

You know,

I'm not I'm not going to say that again.

And then you get a little bit older and you meet other people that aren't afraid and you start to get less afraid and then you're not afraid and then it just happens.

And then and then we meet each other.

And the tentacles of the Internet is the this is the greatest part about it to me,

Is that I get to I get to meet some of the coolest people I've ever met in my life that aren't aren't afraid and that are willing to talk about these things very matter of factly.

It isn't it isn't even it doesn't even seem out of the ordinary to me for many years now,

Because I've known so many people that are on a path of being a seeker.

And and that is that's why I do this.

I basically it's just that there's no other bigger reason.

I certainly am not getting wealthy.

No,

But happy and healthy is more important than wealthy.

But you're allowed to have wealth too.

You know,

There's this sort of holier than thou thing of,

You know,

Money being a dirty word,

But money's just energy.

You're allowed energy too.

You're allowed it.

You know,

It's all about being open,

Open to deceive.

Marianne Williamson's course in miracles and various other people have been extremely influential on allowing us to be open to,

You know,

Be who we really are.

This is the age of Aquarius.

So you know.

Here we go.

Yeah,

You're allowed to be what you are,

Whatever you feel that you are.

Just express yourself.

And isn't that lovely?

I'm not trying to be glib here,

But we're moving into a new age and things are changing.

I just keep the positive view and I see where it's going into that state of peace that we're going to be in in about two or three hundred years from now.

So we're in the kind of foothills of that,

Making that progress into a far better society.

But we'll have to go through that change.

I just think,

Well,

I'll not be here physically to see it,

Although I might be in a different form.

But that is coming,

That lovely state of being that,

You know,

More peaceful way of living.

I just think it'll be lovely.

And I hold to that,

I try to allow that future peaceful state of harmony and humanity to come into the present time.

Because really there isn't any time either.

We're all living in the old time zones,

Old time frames are synonymous.

We tend to see it as this very linear,

But in actual fact,

That future by tapping into it,

You're bringing it into the present.

It's coming.

Just enjoy.

I love your laugh Bob,

It cracks me up.

Well I love your,

I just love to laugh and I love when other people laugh.

It's just always,

Always had that since I was a kid.

It's one of my favorite things is laughter.

I'm glad you appreciate that.

I loved having you on this podcast.

I can't wait to listen to it again when I edit it and get it out there.

I'm looking forward to that.

Thank you so much.

No,

No,

Thank you.

It's been an absolute pleasure.

I mean,

I really enjoyed every minute of it.

Same here.

I know I could,

We may have to do another one down the road.

And if anybody who's listening can send me an email about what Sticky Willie is actually called,

I'd need to know that.

I do need,

It's a Velcro like plant with little sticky,

Not sticky like glue,

But sticky like Velcro.

It's not jaggy.

It's just,

It sticks to the clothes so that the plant can disperse its little furry balls.

It's not Jimson weed is it?

I don't know what you call it.

It's just Sticky Willie.

It's cleavers.

That's what it's called or goose.

Okay.

Well,

You botanists out there,

You plant folks.

Goose grass or something.

Okay.

Well,

I'm going to find out.

Somebody will send me an email and this is how I'll get the information.

Then I'll email you.

I don't know why.

I just,

I pick up on a little phrase and it just cracks me up.

Sticky Willie.

Have a beautiful day.

Thank you so much of Jenny Light.

There's no such thing as too much Jenny Light.

Much appreciation for you folks tuning in to the Exploding Human.

Check out the website,

Theexplodinghuman.

Com,

The YouTube channel,

The Exploding Human with Bob Nickman and the Exploding Human Facebook page.

Once again,

Big thanks to Jenny Light for a delightful talk.

Have a beautiful day.

Thank you so much.

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