Staying Steady In Challenging Times

Sometimes things don’t go as we have planned or the way we think we want them to go. Is it good? Is it bad? Who knows. What we do know is that whether we like it or not, there are times that we have to accept the change in plans and roll with it. This meditation explores equanimity and the ability to stay calm and steady in challenging times.

Transcript

I talk a lot about meditation being attention training,

Increasing our ability to focus.

Today I wanted to explore another benefit,

Equanimity,

And how it contributes to our resilience.

Equanimity is the ability to maintain mental calmness,

Composure,

And an even temper,

Especially in difficult situations.

It's easy to be calm and present when things are going smoothly.

The true gift is being able to maintain that steadiness as challenges come along,

Sometimes even as they pile up.

I recently had a week where things were just off.

Life balance seemed to be very elusive,

And glitches kept interfering with what I had planned to get done.

Thankfully it was nothing major,

Just enough that each time it happened it added to this overall sense of frustration.

I finally realized what was so frustrating to me was holding onto my plan for the way things were supposed to be.

When I accepted each annoyance for what it was,

Life's challenges happening,

I was able to let go of my plans and move forward with circumstances as they were.

Responding to each challenge with an open and creative mind,

Versus reacting to each setback.

Some weeks go smoothly,

Some don't.

Neither is permanent or a guarantee for what's ahead.

As we meditate together today,

Bring forward the sense of this concept of equanimity,

Perhaps visualizing yourself as the sky and each event,

Annoyance,

Emotion,

Or thought that arises as a cloud or weather just passing through.

The goal is not to have indifference to life's obstacles,

But an acceptance and a sense of resiliency.

Even when our internal weather patterns are stormy or cloudy,

They will pass.

Today's meditation will be around 10 minutes.

I will guide you through it and keep time.

Let's begin by coming into a comfortable seated position.

And shift to get comfortable.

Allow yourself to settle into this position and this moment of our time together.

When you feel ready,

You can close your eyes or gaze softly down if you prefer.

You may notice as soon as your eyes close,

Sounds,

Thoughts,

Or sensations become more magnified.

Take a moment to notice what is at the forefront of your awareness right now.

This isn't about changing anything or creating any particular experience.

It's sitting with what is already here.

Bring a curiosity and acceptance to what you notice.

If you're already feeling relaxed and settled,

Enjoy that moment.

If your mind is still busy,

It's the nature of the mind.

You can try repeating silently,

I'm here now.

Whatever you need to do in 10 minutes will be waiting for you.

Scan your body for any areas that may be holding on to tension or using unnecessary effort.

Under each tense area,

Take a deep inhale through your nose and imagine it softening on the exhale.

If that area is not softening,

Notice that.

It's likely a spot that you store stress and tension.

And consider revisiting that area throughout your day and softening it over time.

You can scan on your own or join me in some of the more common tense areas.

Inhale and imagine the breath going towards your forehead.

And on the exhale,

Imagine the muscles in your forehead softening.

In your next inhale,

Send the breath to your jaw.

And on the exhale,

Imagine the jaw softening.

Now your shoulders and upper back.

Inhaling slowly,

Sending the breath to your shoulders and upper back.

And on the exhale,

Softening them.

And sending the breath to your chest.

And softening your chest on the exhale.

And finally,

Your stomach.

Sending the breath to your stomach.

And softening it on the exhale.

Can begin deepening your breath.

Inhaling and exhaling slowly and deeply through your nose.

Noticing the temperature of your breath.

If you'd like,

You can experiment with counting your breaths.

Inhaling for four.

Holding for four.

Exhaling for four.

And holding again for four.

You can continue that for a few more breath cycles at your own pace.

Or if you prefer,

Just focusing your awareness on the sensation of the inhale and the exhale.

.

Allow your breathing to return to its natural rhythm and depth.

And rest your attention here for a moment.

Just allowing yourself to breathe and to be.

And just as we scanned our bodies for tension,

Scan yourself for any emotions that might be present.

Maybe you feel calm and happy.

If so,

What does that feel like?

Do you feel like you're in a good flow?

Is there a lightness?

An ease?

Maybe your emotion feels heavier.

Maybe tension and stress are lingering.

Maybe you're frustrated,

Mad,

Sad,

Disappointed,

Or even bored.

Use the emotion and the feelings and sensations that come with it as your focus for meditation.

Become curious about what the emotion feels like physically.

Does observing it versus becoming it create some space and perspective?

Stress is a natural part of life.

Sometimes it even helps us to up our A-game and perform better.

It's negative when it feels bigger than what we can handle or when it builds up in our bodies.

Very often stressful times can lead to a positive or at least growth.

As we prepare to end our meditation,

I want to share with you a parable that I read in Jay Shetty's book,

Think Like a Monk.

It is about a farmer whose horse ran away.

How unlucky his brother tells him.

The farmer shrugs,

Good thing,

Bad thing,

Who knows?

A week later,

The wayward horse finds its way home and with it is a beautiful wild mare.

That's amazing,

His brother says,

Admiring the new horse with no small envy.

Again,

The farmer's unmoved.

Good thing,

Bad thing,

Who knows,

He says.

A few days later,

The father's son climbs up on the mare,

Hoping to tame the wild beast.

But the horse box and rears and the boy hurled to the ground breaks a leg.

How unlucky,

His brother says with a tinge of satisfaction.

Good thing,

Bad thing,

Who knows,

The farmer replies again.

The next day,

The young men of the village are called into military service.

But because the son's leg is broken,

He's excused from the draft.

His brother tells the farmer this.

Surely is the best news of all.

Good thing,

Bad thing,

Who knows,

The farmer says.

The farmer in this story didn't get lost in what if,

But instead focused on what is.

As you go forward in your day,

Notice what arises.

Consider approaching events of your day with that idea of good thing,

Bad thing,

Who knows,

Letting go of what if,

And accepting what is,

And nurturing the skills of resilience and equanimity.

When you feel ready,

You can begin bringing your awareness back into the room.

Slowly shifting in your seat,

Stretching.

Maybe softly at first gazing downward,

Allowing your eyes to slowly open,

Letting a little light in.

And then when you feel ready,

Opening your eyes and going forward with your day.

Thank you.

Reviews

The way you included the story made it an even better meditation. I haven’t been very good lately at keeping up with my routine but I plan on using this meditation more often! Thank youuu

Thank you this has helped me with a situation in my life , upsetting and controlling my thoughts . Good thing bad thing I say and
what IS is most important 🥰🙏

Thank you for this meditation that invites us into sensing steadiness in our bodies and equanimity in our minds. 🙏🏼

Beautiful reminder - it was exactly what I needed after a few days of shifts that my mind has been pushing up against. Thank you ✨