Hey hey hey,
Welcome back!
Today actually marks the halfway point on our journey from self-sabotage to full self-expression.
So it's day four of seven and today we are going to tackle the topic of worthiness.
That is when you don't believe that you're worthy of whatever it is that you want.
So let's talk a little bit about worthiness and you know how it shows up as a form of self-sabotage and then we're going to cover three ways to stop sabotaging our selves in this way.
So how does doubting our worth cause self-sabotage?
Well when we really want something but we indulge in thoughts like I don't deserve this,
We create something called cognitive dissonance which is that painful state of having inconsistency in our thoughts,
Our beliefs,
And our attitudes.
And our minds always try to resolve cognitive dissonance but they usually do it through the path of least resistance which would be to stay in that known victim-y place with those known victim-y thoughts in our little known victim-y comfort zone and act in a way and behave in a way that proves those thoughts right and that reflects that reality which is going to resolve the cognitive dissonance right because we got these two opposing things so and we can all kind of converge into one but you know the the byproduct of that is that we also are going to be sabotaging ourselves because we move away from possibility towards what we've always known that does not serve us.
So worthiness is something that I've personally struggled with a lot in life just from core wound stuff that I think a lot of us have.
So for example right after I decided to or right after I did quit my job at Google to you know create my own business and to coach full-time I went to Guatemala to lead a yoga retreat there but also for me it was a trip that was meant to be you know a celebration of what was the biggest boldest decision that I had ever made and the retreat was totally perfect like everyone who came was so cool and fun and everyone just like connected really well the views were amazing the place where we stayed the yoga forest it was like overlooking Lake Atitlan and even from the outdoor toilet you could just like see everything in these volcanoes this beautiful like magical mystical spiritual lake the food was amazing we did a ton of ecstatic dance and you know everything was just great and during the ecstatic dance like often you know I dance with an intention and my intention was to really allow myself to fully celebrate because I don't think that's something we do enough and I think it's just as important to let yourself fully feel you know feelings of joy love happiness blah blah all that stuff just as much as it's important to allow ourselves to feel negative emotions which there's no such thing really but anyways every time I was like trying to just like take in what was happening and celebrate it and enjoy it I would be overcome by these waves of guilt and this feeling that I didn't deserve and I you know don't deserve this new life this happiness and it really felt like the universe had made a mistake or something and so after I realized what was actually happening when I came back to San Francisco I got on the phone with my own coach and I did my work around it because I knew that if I didn't do anything I'd end up sabotaging my own success in my business and my happiness overall and really what's the point of having what you said you wanted if you're not able to enjoy it or worse yet if you're just gonna actively destroy it so that's why it's so important we do our work on self-sabotage so how can you stop sabotaging yourself by doubting your worthiness let's cover three ways together number one I love this one you can stop believing your thoughts about not being worthy notice that I didn't say stop having those thoughts because the truth is we do not we cannot control our thoughts we have no control over what thoughts arise and when and diluting yourself into thinking you do is actually only gonna cause more suffering because not only are those thoughts you're trying to avoid not only are they gonna inevitably come up but then you're gonna probably beat yourself up for having them which is only going to make things worse so it's a vicious cycle what we do have control over though over though thank goodness is where we place and hold our attention so next time I don't deserve it comes up or any disempowering thought for that matter remember this amazing this amazing amazing teaching that I got from one of my teachers that has just changed my whole life and that is thoughts are tools not truths so remind yourself of that and then direct your attention elsewhere to a more empowering belief which brings me to number two number two the antidoting thought for the belief I don't deserve it is not its opposite I do deserve it because that actually just keeps you in the same context which is that worthiness is something we have to earn so rather consider this your true nature cannot be earned or deserved it simply is your true nature cannot be earned or deserved it simply is so consider that remember that and then put your focus on simply receiving with an open heart whatever it is that's being offered to you whatever it is that's coming your way and showing up in your life it does not matter how it came to be what matters is how fully you allow yourself to receive the grace and what you choose to do with it like how much you love it and how much you share it finally number three practice embracing the idea that life is a co-creation it's really popular today to believe that you create your own reality with your thoughts and that's actually supposed to be an empowering idea but it's actually not true at all and it's not an empowering thing to believe because again to a large extent we cannot control our thoughts and because it keeps us in the context of things being our fault and believing you create your own reality is actually a form of victimhood in disguise or it can be and it only strengthens the ego so instead consider that you are co-creating with the universe with God with the goddess with you know whatever that higher power is that you believe in and maybe it's just you know like nature and scientific forces but still consider that you are co-creating it's a partnership try that belief on for the next month and see how you fare with it I would love to hear how it goes and that's it for today ladies thanks so much for being on this journey with me and reach out if you have any feedback or questions and I'm so grateful to be able to connect with you and share with you in this way please let me know how I can be of service and see you tomorrow for video number five
