Discovering Your Unique Voice With Lauri Smith - E66

On my journey of reclaiming my power, I devoted lots of energy to learning how to speak my truth in personal relationships. I had no idea that these humbling lessons would also translate into public speaking skills years later! So when I recently met Soulful Speaking Coach Lauri Smith, we clicked immediately. Lauri treats speaking as a spiritual practice that raises consciousness by healing old wounds, guiding us home to our true selves. Join us in our conversation where we discuss her aha moments, integration process, vulnerability on and offstage and best tips for new and experienced speakers.

Transcript

Hello,

I'm Annie Musu,

A certified EFT tapping master practitioner.

I help women build confidence,

Set boundaries,

And enjoy healthy relationships.

Welcome to my podcast,

Hush Your Mind,

Building a better relationship with yourself.

On this show,

I offer practical wisdom to help you clear fears,

Limiting beliefs,

And trauma so that you can gracefully create a life you love.

Thanks for joining me in episode number 66 of my podcast,

Hush Your Mind,

Building a better relationship with yourself.

In today's episode,

I have the immense pleasure of sharing my conversation with a public speaking expert about finding our unique voice.

On my journey of reclaiming my power,

I devoted lots of energy to learning how to speak my truth in personal relationships.

I had no idea that these humbling lessons would also translate into public speaking skills years later.

And just in case,

By public speaking,

I mean anything from creating a YouTube video,

Giving a presentation,

Teaching a workshop,

And speaking on stage.

It's been a pleasant surprise.

With a little practice,

The fruits of my personal labor,

Validating my needs,

Expressing my opinions,

And feeling steady and grounded in who I am,

Naturally helped me feel more confident before audiences.

That's a huge victory for this introvert.

Because now that deep foundation of self-compassion lets me get out of my own way so that I can inspire and support more and more women to find and value their unique voice.

So when I recently met soulful speaking coach Lori Smith,

We clicked immediately.

Her uncommon approach to public speaking intrigued me,

And I knew I had to have her as a guest on my podcast.

Lori is a speaker,

The creator of the vocal presence path approach to soulful speaking,

And the author of Your Voice Matters,

A guide to speaking soulfully when it counts.

She helps sensitive visionaries,

Ambitious empaths,

And loving rebels to speak,

Be seen,

And fulfill their soul's calling.

Lori treats speaking as a spiritual practice that raises consciousness by healing old wounds,

Guiding us home to our true selves.

Her mission is to call forth more open-hearted leaders to do their part to change the world with authenticity,

Creativity,

And courage.

She envisions a world in which everyone shares the vibration of their soul's purpose with the world through their voices,

And together we reach global harmony.

Lori can always see the soul underneath the static,

Which makes her really good at motivating people to fight their inner demons and find tremendous inner power.

Here are a few things we discussed in our chat.

What's your first aha moment with public speaking?

What needed to be integrated for you to enjoy public speaking?

How does your voice show up in your personal relationships?

What's the next step on your journey?

And what advice would you give to new and experienced public speakers?

We hope this conversation will inspire you to speak your truth and step into your power,

Whether that's in a relationship,

A work setting,

In a TikTok,

Or on a stage.

Enjoy.

Welcome,

Lori.

It's such a pleasure to have you as a guest.

Thank you.

Thank you,

Annie,

For having me.

I'm so happy to be here.

Let's dive right in.

I'm curious,

What is your first aha moment when it comes to public speaking?

Two of them came to mind,

And I feel like they're related,

So I'll go ahead and share.

One was when I was in high school.

I won a bunch of scholarships to go to college.

For some of them,

You had to write things.

I had to give a speech for one of them.

I had written something,

And I had to go in and thank them for the money and actually give a speech.

I was not happy about it.

I'm a Taurus,

And as a 17 or 18-year-old young girl,

I was like,

But I already wrote the thing.

I already got the grades.

Why do I have to give a speech?

Clearly,

There was some resistance to it.

I remember when I went in to do it,

It was a piece of writing that I had written for a class that wasn't even 100% mine.

It was like,

You know,

Take something from The Grapes of Wrath and mimic its style and change it up.

I had also submitted that to win this.

It didn't even feel that personal to me because it was sort of like I basically did the Cliff Notes version of getting an A and getting the scholarship.

Yet,

When I stood up there to thank them and to read this thing,

My voice was tremoring,

My legs were shaking,

And I got emotional and was on the verge of tears as I was sharing this.

The women,

The older women who were part of the organization giving me the scholarship,

Came up to me afterwards and were saying,

That was so moving.

I did not process that at that time.

All I could think about was I just was crying in front of a bunch of people,

And I wasn't acting at the time that I was doing it.

That was one moment where there weren't the ahas at the time,

And it feels really important.

Then my other aha moment related to public speaking actually wasn't when I was speaking,

It was when I was in a theater class.

I was in a theater class,

My favorite one ever.

Normally,

When we worked in class,

There would be two to four of us up on stage,

And then others and our instructor Richard out there watching.

On this day,

We did something called a short stack,

Where everybody was focused on me and they were jumping up with me,

But it was like they were off stage and I was up on stage by myself.

I kept pulling myself together in between each of these little moments that we were doing.

Eventually,

He paused the exercise,

As he did with me on occasion over my three and a half years or whatever it was of working with him,

To give me a clue of what I wasn't getting.

He said,

Whatever you're doing in between the scenes,

I don't know whether you think you're composing yourself,

Stop doing that.

I said,

I'm not that comfortable having everyone's eyes on me.

He took off his glasses and he said,

Then you've picked a strange set of careers for yourself.

Part of you wants this,

Part of you knows you're meant to be here.

That went straight through all of my inner critics and soul suckers and protectors and landed as truth.

He held such a safe space that particularly by that point,

When he paused things and took off his glasses,

I was used to he's always right,

I'm always safe.

I went back into the exercise and I was consciously relaxing and not pulling myself together,

Relaxing my jaw tension,

Relaxing the muscles of my chest and my butt.

As the exercise continued,

It was like decades of protection was burning and melting away at the same time.

And when the exercise was over,

I looked out and I could see and feel what kind of an emotional state everybody in the room was in with nothing blocking that.

I now say it was my first moment of oneness that lasted beyond the acting or beyond,

I played sports and there would be times where you would feel that state of oneness where you're all really in sync with each other,

But it was for the sake of the sport or for the sake of the play that we were putting on.

This was,

Oh,

We're not doing anything right now.

The exercise is over and I can feel everybody.

And the aha that came from that,

That led to me being a better actor at first,

And then also to speaking and the work that I do with others is that we are all charismatic.

We were born with charisma.

It is not something that some people have and everybody else is screwed because they don't have it.

We're all born with it.

And then we are taught and we do things throughout our lives to cover it up.

And the way to unleash our charisma is to actually choose to be seen,

To choose to let people in.

And the more we do that,

The more the resonance of our voice changes,

Our energy changes.

It's like we soften.

And when we let others see us,

When we're public speaking,

They often actually feel like we're seeing them more deeply.

And that work of choose to be seen,

Let yourself,

Your true self out and create from there is how I work with speakers today.

Wow.

Wow.

Such an amazing story.

I can just imagine how unrattling it was to be on that stage and to have the exercise be stopped in that moment,

That pivotal moment.

And to finally have to face all those layers,

Like you're saying,

The soul suckers.

I love that.

And the inner critics,

Because there are many,

It's not just one.

And there are all these past experiences and people who have told us you have to stay small and your voice doesn't matter.

So that,

Wow,

I can imagine that would speak to so many people in my audience because a lot of us are recovering people pleasers.

I've come from a codependent family and have transformed my own toxic marriage and I have a thriving relationship with my husband today.

But that is a crazy journey to be on,

To come from that background of not having a voice and then discovering,

Oh,

I have charisma,

Me,

Little old me.

Gosh,

I'm just so curious what needed to be integrated for you to get to that point,

To actually enjoy being seen?

I mean,

That is risky.

Yeah.

So many things needed to be integrated.

Believing that I was enough.

I also remember,

I don't remember if this conversation was the same day,

In his theater class,

It was about the acting and it wasn't about the acting.

Like,

We would tap into things going on in our lives.

And I remember him at one point saying,

You think you need to,

Like,

This is not exactly his words at the time,

But you think you need to contort yourself in order to fit in,

In order to be liked.

And I think you'll find the more you do this,

That the opposite is true.

You are keeping people at arm's distance.

The more you be yourself and you let them in,

The more the right people will be drawn to you.

And he was talking about,

Like,

Friends,

Relationships.

He was,

I did not have a business at that point,

Really.

He was talking about friends and relationships and just as a universal truth that we're all taught that we need to,

If I look like this,

Will I fit into this group?

If I look like this,

Will this group accept me?

And that has been integrated over more decades of having times where it's like I've integrated it to a new level and then something else comes up to challenge me,

Hey,

Even more,

Even more trust your intuition,

Even more embrace your own knowing you're the only one who knows how to live your life and how to communicate with the world from there.

And the more I've done that in every corner of my life,

The more comfortable I've gotten in speaking.

And I also just flashed on a moment when I was doing a teacher training for voice for theater.

And we did a similar thing where we got up on stage and we would say,

I want everyone to look away.

And everybody would put their heads down.

So we were in control.

I want all of the men to look at me.

I want all of the men to look away.

I want all of the women to look at me.

I want all of the women to look away.

And it sounds like a funky exercise.

And yet it was one of the deepest,

Most vulnerable getting to choose.

I'm here,

I'm present.

And it's like a game of Simon Says.

When I say I want the men to look at their feet,

Everybody,

Every man in the room looks down at their feet.

And that was another moment of kind of fire and ice that had to do with teaching,

That had to do,

Which is a form of speaking.

And I remember feeling like another set of layers of,

Oh,

I can even be emotional when I'm the one teaching or standing on a stage and speaking.

So those kinds of things of trusting in myself,

Embracing my empathy as a superpower,

Rather than thinking,

If I cry,

It means I'm weak,

And I'm supposed to be strong as a speaker.

I know that the emotions that we've all been taught to suppress for so much of our lives is actually connected to the prana,

The chi,

The life force,

The energy,

And the charisma.

And when we're trying to suppress them,

We're blocking our charisma.

When we let them flow,

What you resist persists.

And if we let them flow,

Then they change,

And they become like paint colors to be painting an experience with the audience.

One last thing that I feel like I integrated came from being an actor who goes on auditions,

And then also teaching actors and being a director.

And there can be this feeling,

Both in speaking and for an actor doing an audition,

That there's an adversarial relationship with the audience.

And when I did all of them kind of around the same time,

It really landed in me,

You know,

When a director is casting their play,

They're not in an adversarial place.

Every single person that walks through the door,

They're thinking,

I hope this is the one.

If they're casting Romeo and Juliet,

I hope this is my Juliet.

They're so rooting for you,

Because they're rooting for themselves in their own production in rooting for you.

And speakers can think,

Because a lot of times there's like,

Especially in a physical space,

There are those rows of chairs staring at you.

It can feel like an adversarial relationship,

And yet most of the time,

It's also the opposite.

People have come to listen to you speak,

They want to learn something,

They want to have an experience.

Now they may get triggered by speakers so that you do at times start to see some people in the audience sort of looking at you and it seems adversarial.

And what I now know in my bones as a speaker and a speaker trainer,

Is that it's not about the speaker.

It's about the transformation and their life journey,

And they're going through the moment in that journey that is triggered,

Defensive,

Adversarial.

It's not,

I did something to make that person angry.

It's we're having an experience here that's triggering them.

And that's their journey.

I have no control over that.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Wow.

Gosh,

That resonates so much with me as I just get more attention in what I do.

There's a lot of people,

Many,

Many people who are giving me such positive feedback.

And there's always one or two people who have something negative to say,

And they're not saying with tact necessarily.

It's not necessarily constructive.

And yeah,

What I've learned is that it's so necessary to be anchored in yourself.

And that just in those few words,

Anchored in yourself can mean so much,

So many years of integration for you to be able to function from that foundation.

Without that,

It's shaky and you're just going to be attacked.

You're going to feel attacked.

And so yeah,

The adversarial relationship with the public,

The audience,

That just resonates so much.

What if we imagine that our audience had good intentions and they're actually here to learn from you and they want to actually hear what you have to say?

I mean,

What if we applied that to first our personal relationships and come from that perspective,

Right?

I think everyone would just relax a little bit more on stage and in the audience.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I just remember just when,

As you were speaking,

I had to give or I chose to give a speech for my best friend at the time.

So I was the bridesmaid that she chose that would give the speech,

You know,

On her behalf.

And I memorized the speech.

And so I had my notes with me,

But I barely looked at them.

And I remember thinking,

Wow,

I'm so grateful that there's this huge distance between me,

The microphone and the audience,

Because I couldn't really see them.

They were so far away.

And I thought,

Huh,

That's funny.

I need that distance to feel safe,

To be able to be anchored in myself and speak my truth.

And I thought,

Wow,

That's something I could improve.

And surprisingly,

After the speech,

Literally dozens of people came over to me and said,

I loved your speech.

That was amazing.

You really spoke from the heart.

I was so surprised because I didn't really feel that way in the moment.

So when you're saying there's this contrast between what you're experiencing as a speaker on the stage and what's happening in the audience,

I don't know,

I'm a bit confused.

How do you explain that?

I mean,

Are we just lost in our thoughts and me,

Me,

Me or what's going on?

Yeah,

Well,

Sometimes when it feels more vulnerable to us,

This happens in the speaker studio all the time,

People will start to let down their guard.

So they'll speak,

And then I'll give some feedback.

They'll let down some of their guard,

Applying the feedback,

And they'll do it again.

And a lot of times,

The very first time they do it a second round,

Some of the people will say that felt worse.

And everybody watching says it was better.

Or there was maybe something that they liked about the first one,

And that they were more open,

They appeared more confident,

And definitely more alive and vibrant and engaging in that openness and vulnerability.

So I wasn't there at the wedding.

And part of me feels like there was enough distance that you opened up,

Even though you couldn't see them,

You sort of let them in.

Because they were far enough away,

It wasn't overwhelming to you.

And it felt vulnerable.

And sometimes our inner critics come in and go,

That must have been horrible,

Because they don't like the vulnerability.

Whereas vulnerability can actually be incredibly powerful and mesmerizing to people.

Yeah,

Yeah,

It really goes to show what can happen if we get out of our way.

Even if it's just for a few minutes,

To let that magic and the flow go through us,

You know?

Yeah,

Yeah.

And,

And focus on what's the why?

Like,

What is it that you love about your friend that has you getting up there at her wedding to speak in the first place,

And reconnecting to that intention,

Or that calling,

Or that sense of purpose?

Makes all of the other stuff that we're integrating a little easier,

Or it kind of makes sense.

Like,

Oh,

I'm learning to process my own empathy in front of a crowd,

Because of this greater calling,

Because I want to honor my friend.

Yes,

Yes.

Yeah,

I really did feel like in those few minutes I gave the talk,

I kind of stepped out of my old self.

For just a few minutes,

It was almost like life took over.

And I was able to just speak from the heart.

And that's what seemed like it touched people the most.

So yeah,

Yeah.

So I'm,

You know,

You know,

I've been looking at your work and just resonating so much with it.

And I was just so surprised to learn that our voice can be different on stage and off stage.

I know it just sounds kind of basic.

But to me,

I thought,

Well,

If someone's confident on the stage,

It necessarily means they must be confident in their real,

You know,

Their personal relationships.

And you've taught me that that's not necessarily true,

That we can have a confident voice on stage and not necessarily be,

You know,

Matching in the level of confidence in our personal relationships.

And for me,

I found my voice through my transformation of my marriage and learning how to speak my truth in my personal relationships.

And then that translated into my work in public speaking,

And showing up in workshops and speaking to thousands of people during summits.

And so I'm curious,

How does your voice show up in your personal relationships?

Yeah,

I believe speaking is our spiritual,

It is a part of our spiritual journey as beings in a human body.

And I'm full of sports metaphors.

Certain players are better in certain types of games.

And I feel like our voice is our voice.

It's our instrument for navigating the world,

Whether I'm on stage as an actor,

I'm on stage as a leader,

Teacher,

Speaker,

Or I'm having a conversation with my husband.

And just like certain athletes are better in different types of circumstances.

They're all related.

And I have felt like the strongest is on stage as an actor.

Speaking,

Teaching,

Leading is probably a really close second.

And the place where it's like,

Laurie is more challenged over here is in personal relationships.

I remember when I said,

I love you to my husband for the first time,

It came out like,

And he immediately got closer and said,

Say it again.

And I said it a few times.

And it was like feeling the voice gets stronger in that vulnerability.

And he is also my twin flames.

Like I had said,

I love you to people before it had been a very,

Very long time.

I spent a lot of my life single because I had all these friends in our 20s that just went from person to person to person.

And I was like,

I don't understand that.

Like,

If it's not working for you,

Isn't it better to be alone?

Like,

Why would you do this torture thing to yourself?

One friend and I in particular,

Like meeting in the middle with how we were dealing with relationships in our 20s might have been a great balance.

I also remember a moment as an executive assistant when the economy was kind of going into the crapper.

At least it was after the dot com bubble had burst,

Maybe before everything sort of tanked in the early 2000s.

So for a holiday party,

All of the executive assistants made the decorations that went on the tables.

And at the end of the party,

People just took them.

Not those of us that had created them and all of the other executive assistants were upset.

And I've had this happen many times in my life where it's like,

I feel the pull or I'm literally pushed forward by others like you go speak on behalf of us.

And I went in to talk to my boss at the time.

And I was this was pre letting down the armor that I let down in that acting class,

Very composed.

And I'm speaking on behalf of people.

And it was like,

I was not in myself,

Not in my own power,

Not in the feeling of we're upset they took these things we made.

And I was trying to describe it and sort of like my energy and my words were dancing all around it.

And he kept asking me questions because he actually cared about me.

And I finally got the clue like you're gonna have to like drop into your body and say we made these things with our own hands and we want them back.

Like we're sad that we didn't get to take them home.

And I burst into tears as I was saying it,

Which in the Silicon Valley in a corporate environment.

It felt you don't do that.

Thank goodness the door was closed because he was fine with it.

Like there are people in the Silicon Valley that would have like exploded if a woman started crying in their office.

It was weird.

I was happy the door was closed.

And he,

You know,

Was like shocked that I was crying.

And then he like looked at me and started hearing the words and he went,

Oh,

I understand.

And he went and got as many of them back as he could get for all of us.

That's another,

You know,

If you'd put me on the stage and told me to act a moment like that,

I probably would have knocked it out of the park.

In my own life,

It was like I was feeling the,

You know,

Don't cry,

Don't cry,

Don't cry,

Don't let anyone in suppressing.

And it was kind of causing haywire in my brain.

Like I,

Trying to explain it without being clear and therefore getting vulnerable was creating all kinds of confusion in the situation.

Yeah,

I'm starting to get the feeling that on stage,

You know,

I've had just a little stint as a munchkin in The Wizard of Oz,

I was going to say it in French,

Magicien d'Oz.

The Wizard of Oz in high school.

So I don't have that much experience in the acting world.

I'm curious then,

It sounds like there's some sort of distance when you're being the actor.

But I also know I've heard on other podcast episodes that you've described it as you're putting on the queen's outfit on your naked body.

You're not wearing a t-shirt and jeans and then putting on the role of the queen.

You are the queen.

And so what,

There's a different kind of vulnerability it sounds like in that office as the executive assistant and having to be vulnerable on stage.

It's,

Yeah,

Two different kinds of vulnerability.

Yeah,

They're very related.

It's like they're kissing cousins or sisters that are holding hands.

There is a feeling,

There is really a feeling of connection,

Especially at this point,

Because the acting is kind of my end of the spectrum that's easier.

You are sharing things that are in your heart and soul.

The most vulnerable would be if you acted in a thing that you wrote,

Which I did once.

When I had taken a five year break from acting,

I decided to go into the biggest auditions in the area and do a monologue that I had written.

And the first time I said it aloud,

I couldn't say it without crying.

And it was actually a comedy.

By the time,

You know,

So there's a like,

It's vulnerable because it's my body doing these vulnerable things here live in this space with other people.

That sometimes when you're acting,

It's just a little different when it's,

I'm the vessel for this and it's a little different than if I wrote it.

And we are very,

If you're really good,

We are intimately connected to the audience,

Like we're vibing and pulsing.

And there are studies out there that say that actors and audience alike,

By the time a two hour show is over,

The hearts are all beating in sync with each other.

And I love that now,

That kind of,

I do performances in theater where they're not much further away from my face than you are right now.

It's a really intimate basement theater.

When we step up on a stage to speak and if we're speaking for the sake of our calling,

Our business,

Our calling,

Poetry that we wrote,

There's a different kind of vulnerability because it's like,

No,

This thing that I'm sharing is 100% mine.

So all of the like,

I want you to like it.

I want to touch you with it.

I want this to matter.

I want to have an impact with it.

It's all coming up in a different way as a speaker.

And then over in our lives,

It's even more intimate or it really was for me at that time.

It's that moment of,

This is something I care about.

I had a little bit of a purpose,

Like it was me and also all of these other people that I was speaking on behalf of that frankly helps me.

And really part of what feels like it makes it the hardest for me is what if there is no purpose?

What if I'm saying,

I want that back because I made it with my two hands and I'm upset that someone took it.

Will you help me get it back?

Or something like in a relationship,

I love you to my husband,

Goodness,

I hope you love me back.

There's no greater cause.

It's just I'm a human being and this is how I feel.

And I want you to feel the same way too.

That for me is the most vulnerable.

And I think this is true of a lot of women.

This is what I want because I want it.

I'm going to put it out.

I'm going to ask for it.

And I have to sit in this fiery space to wait for your answer to this thing that I've expressed that is a want or a need of mine.

I'm getting better.

Like asking for things that I made with my own two hands would not be as hard now.

And it's almost 20 years.

Oh,

It's over 20 years.

That was in between like 2000 and 2005 somewhere.

So it's probably over 20 years.

Those are a little easier because I'm working that muscle and getting stronger.

But that's part of what I think the differences are between a stage and our personal lives.

Yes,

Yeah,

It sounds like there's,

There are risks in both camps.

And the risk in your personal relationships sounds a lot greater,

If I can say,

If I may say so,

It sounds like it because if we're risking abandonment,

And that's a primary need for all of us,

The love and acceptance is a primary need,

Gosh,

Then the,

You know,

The risk of being abandoned in a relationship is such a threat to our nervous system.

But it can Yeah,

It makes sense.

And if we're not used to expressing our needs and our wants,

Then yeah,

It's frightening.

And then on a stage,

If you're speaking from passion,

And you're calling,

Maybe I'm also thinking about like finances,

If you're strapped for finances,

And your your rent depends on this,

Then I can imagine it'd be a lot harder as well.

So yeah,

Yeah,

Yeah.

Yeah.

And they say that,

When we're on a stage,

Particularly people who are speaking,

Where it's almost like the theater arena and the personal arena,

The things that make you vulnerable in each of those is coming together.

Yes,

When we're speaking,

This is the thing that I created,

I created a whole company.

I've created a body of work.

And now I'm sharing it.

It's similar to the like,

I made this centerpiece,

My own two hands.

And we're being seen by a lot of people.

And public speaking supposedly makes us feel like we're going to be like ousted from the tribe if we're not accepted and die.

Like it's bringing up things that are in our ancestry in our tissues that don't really apply now.

But our nervous system doesn't know,

Hey,

The audience is not the same thing as a bear.

They're not going to throw rocks,

Probably not even tomatoes at me.

Yeah,

Yeah.

So what,

What is your go to tip for new speakers,

People who are just getting their toes into the water?

My go to tip for new speakers would be to set an intention for what you want the audience to feel.

Because when we don't do that,

It's like going river rafting,

And having our inner critics,

If we don't set it consciously,

Our inner critics come in and they set it.

And it's like going river rafting and spending the whole time going,

I hope I don't fall out of the raft.

I hope I don't hit the rocks.

And as I say that,

Just,

You know,

Notice what happens in your body as I'm saying it.

And it's like years ago,

I saw a Volkswagen bug commercial.

And then I all I could see were Volkswagen bugs everywhere,

Wherever we put our attention,

We're going to see those things.

So if we shift our attention to I'm inviting a sense of curiosity,

That's what I hope happens in the room,

Or a sense of openness,

Or light a fire under them,

Or help them feel more grounding,

Whatever intention we set,

Then when we start to look out and feel the audience,

We start to see and feel signs of that,

Just like the VW bug.

Yes,

Yes.

Yeah,

There's a term for it in the science,

You know,

There's a scientific term for it,

I forget what it is.

But that's what the law of attraction is all about,

Too,

Right?

Yeah.

What you focus on grows.

Yeah.

So yeah,

Yeah,

Wonderful tip.

Okay.

And how about experienced speakers?

And someone like me,

Who's already have,

You know,

I have a pretty good amount of experience already,

I'm pretty comfortable in front of the camera now.

How can we refine our skills?

The second,

Second word,

You know,

Do the intention also,

And you probably already are intuitively.

And then align,

Align your body,

Your breath and your energy with your most expressive self.

And my,

My current favorite metaphor for this one is to imagine Madonna singing.

Okay.

And then imagine Lady Gaga.

Okay.

There's a resonance happening with Lady Gaga,

That Madonna as a singer,

Her instrument wasn't trained for that.

And most of us have been trained in the world to be more like the Madonna version.

And Madonna in the 80s,

There was also like mechanical flattening of her voice happening because of how they did the music industry in the 80s.

With Lady Gaga,

Whether you like her or not,

There's a different resonance coming out.

It's often like people will say their hairs were standing up on end.

We're all capable of that as speakers,

We have our own unique sound our own unique resonance.

So spending some time really developing the instrument to resonate in a different way is one thing for more advanced speakers.

The other piece is then,

If you've set an intention to be really inviting people to come along for the ride that you're creating.

And a lot of that has to do with becoming almost like a sorcerer in the silence,

Not just comfortable with moments of silence.

Comfort when you're a more advanced speaker becomes almost a given.

Whereas for a newbie,

The silence is like,

Horribly scary.

Yeah,

When you're more comfortable in the silence,

You start having a conversation.

And every single time you speak is different.

And you're like the person,

The river rafting guide,

Who's going,

We're going to slow down a bit here so that you can feel audience and transform.

And now we're going to speed up because that part of the ride is better for you,

This audience on this day,

If we speed it up a little bit here,

And you almost become like a sorcerer of what kind of journey are you taking them on through deep listening and inviting them every step of the way.

Yes,

Yes.

Wow.

I love that metaphor.

I can,

I can see myself doing that.

And I can see how we'd have to be comfortable with our own silence,

Being okay in our own body,

In our own mind and soul.

Again,

That foundation of being anchored into who you are,

And then speaking for your truth from that space.

Yeah,

Because you have to be almost like,

I want to say perfect,

But I feel like you have to be so anchored in yourself that you'd be able to be at ease enough to be able to feel what's happening in your audience and to adjust.

Kind of maybe what I do in like my one to one sessions,

But on a bigger scale.

That's what I feel like I'm doing.

I'm always paying attention to the littlest change on my client's facial expressions or the tone of voice.

And I need to be super grounded in myself to be able to guide them into the next step,

The next step,

Especially when we're working with trauma.

Yeah.

And so I imagine on a stage or public speaking opportunity,

It'd be very similar.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And the,

When you're working with your one-on-one clients,

You're holding them in a safe space.

And when you get on a stage,

It's the same thing that's happening and the space that's being held is bigger.

So being grounded in yourself and also hugging the whole room energetically so that they feel just as safe to transform however much they're going to during your speaking in the same way that your clients feel safe in your energetic arms in your one-on-one sessions.

I love that.

Okay.

Yeah.

I'm going to contemplate that.

It's so juicy.

All right.

So I'm wondering now what's your next step on your journey?

My big next step on my journey is I am launching a podcast.

By the time this comes out,

It will probably be out there.

It's coming out momentarily.

We're days away.

It's called Soulful Speaking.

And it's all about this kind of the deeper conversations about speaking,

Particularly on a stage.

And yet,

As people have heard from this today,

If our voice is our instrument in the world,

It's going to touch every corner of our lives.

And I am on a mission to help people that are here to change the world to have resources that they need to support them in doing that.

And I do not feel that all of the big industrial training programs out there who each all have their own podcast are having the conversations or helping people that are the leaders of today and the leaders of the future.

It's trying to put them in a mask that's an old outdated mask rather than helping people to unleash their one of a kind radiance so that they can do the work they're here to do to make the world a better place.

So the podcast is one way of supporting them.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I really love the work that you're doing because I can feel the new energy that you're bringing into the landscape of public speaking.

I'm linking this to the spiritual aspect of things.

There's 3D old school way of doing things for many things.

Like if we look at the institutions that are falling apart and the very patriarchal approach to work and all of that,

It's all crumbling.

And we're doing our work individually and collectively to transform that and bring in what a lot of people call the 5D or the more heart centered approach to things where now we're being ourselves fully in all arenas of life.

We're bridging the personal and the professional and showing up fully as we are.

It's what's going to make us magnetic and speak to people deeply.

And that's how the world's going to become a more joyful,

Peaceful place for everyone is if we put down all those masks and show up fully in our light.

So yeah.

Thank you.

Thank you for showing up fully as you are and contributing your piece to the puzzle and transforming this energy individually and collectively.

Thank you so much,

Lori,

For your time.

It was a real pleasure.

It's such a treat always to talk to you.

And I'm just so grateful to have brought you onto my podcast and to just have your light radiate on a bigger and bigger scale.

Your work is so needed.

So thank you for being here.

Thank you so much for having me.

Thank you so much for joining me in this episode of Hush Your Mind.

If you enjoyed it,

Please feel free to visit my about page on my InsightTimer profile and follow me for new content and live EOT tapping sessions.

May you have the courage to love and accept yourself.

Be well and take care.