Meditation - Change Unwanted Behaviors (Parts Work Exercise)

This is an NLP exercise.

This Parts Work Exercise (meditation) has a complimentary EFT Tapping available. The EFT Tapping is to help initiate feelings of love, compassion, and acceptance for our inner parts.

This Parts Work Exercise (meditation) starts with calling a meeting for all of the parts. We thank the participants for attending the meeting, and we emphasize that everyone is valuable, no one will ever get fired, but they can get a promotion if they want. All our parts always have a positive intention for us, no exceptions. We separate the methods being used (unwanted behaviors) from the positive intention. We thank the parts for the positive intention, and we work on updating the methods to behaviors that work better than, or as well as, the old methods, while still keeping the positive intention.

We will never remove any choices, just add new choices.

Transcript

So,

Hello,

Welcome to the EFT Tapping meeting.

Today,

We'll be doing something different.

Today,

We'll be doing parts work,

And this is incorporated by NLP.

However,

We'll be incorporating that NLP parts work together with EFT Tapping.

So,

Today's EFT Tapping is very simple.

If we were working one-on-one after the parts work,

What I would do is tap on everything that came up.

However,

I won't be able to hear your answers.

It will be an internal work for you.

So,

For today's tapping,

We'll do something simple at the end,

But while we're doing the parts work,

I invite you to please pick a tapping point,

Any spot,

And tap while we do this parts work.

This is an internal work.

I will be guiding you how to do the parts work inside of you,

And it's simple enough,

But if anything strong might come up,

That's where tapping comes in,

Where we just keep ourselves safe.

So,

What does tapping do?

Tapping makes sure that it sends signals to the amygdala.

Amygdala is the part of our brain that is responsible for fight,

Flight,

Freeze,

Spawn responses,

And it tells the amygdala that we are safe.

So,

While we're tapping and doing the parts work,

We are making sure that our nervous system knows that we're all safe.

So,

If you'd like to begin,

Here are some tapping points.

You could do all the tapping points if you want,

Or you can pick one point,

Just so you're not distracted figuring out where to tap next.

Here are the tapping points.

You've got side of hand,

Eyebrow point,

Side of eye,

Under eye,

Under nose,

Under lip,

Collarbone,

Side of chest,

And top of head.

Each point has a specific unique benefit to us physically and emotionally,

And wherever your inner wisdom tells you to tap,

That's exactly where you need it.

Even though they all have unique specific points and benefits,

They actually all are still connected to each other.

So,

You're never going to tap on a wrong spot.

They're all connected to each other,

And whichever point you pick,

That's probably where you need the most tapping or help or support.

So,

Just trust yourself.

Whatever you pick is correct.

I usually like collarbone because it's easy to reach,

And back of hand or side of hand.

It's just easy for me to reach.

So,

Today,

I'll be using collarbone.

So,

I invite you all to please close your eyes if that's comfortable to you.

Pick a tapping point and start tapping.

And today,

We're going to be having a meeting with all your parts.

So,

I invite you to please make an announcement internally in your mind.

If you want to do it out loud,

That's fine too.

Announce to your parts,

Hey,

Parts,

Today,

We will be having a meeting.

Please imagine an auditorium or a meeting hall.

I like to imagine a big theater,

And I'm on the stage.

Some people like to imagine a park,

Maybe a church,

Wherever it is most comfortable to you and all your parts.

And as everyone gathers in this auditorium,

Make another announcement and say,

All my parts,

Today,

We have a meeting.

Please come here.

And to all the parts that is not there yet,

Please make sure that your voice extends far enough that they can hear you wherever they are.

Maybe you can give them a little speaker,

Maybe a phone,

However way your voice can reach them.

And we're going to start with a few opening announcements.

As everyone is gathered here today,

Let's thank everyone for being at this meeting.

Thank you,

All my parts,

For being at this meeting today.

Please let everyone know,

I know that you all have a positive intention.

And we don't need to be able to identify any of our parts.

If the crowd looks blurry,

That's okay.

Just allow them to be there in whatever shape,

Way,

Or form they're comfortable.

The most important thing is that they can hear you.

Let all your parts know,

Nobody is going to get fired today.

Everyone is safe.

Let them know that you know they are all equal and valuable.

Please let your parts know,

There is a difference between their positive intention and the methods they use to carry out these intentions.

Let them know that you will never ask any part to give up its positive intention.

And you will offer them today an opportunity to update their methods if they choose.

We're not going to be taking away any choices away from anybody.

We're only going to add new choices.

After an appropriate trial period of using these new methods and choices,

If your parts believe that the old methods were working better,

They can go back to it.

And now let's think of a thing or behavior in our life that we would like to change.

And this behavior could be anything from holding on to pain,

Holding on to anger,

Not earning money,

Not willing to have intimate relationships,

Any behavior in your life that you would like to change.

And one more time,

Let's announce to all your parts,

I know you all have a positive intention.

And thank you for being here.

And now we're going to invite the parts to communicate.

Hold with you that behavior that you would like to change.

Keep that in mind.

And look out into the meeting space filled with all your parts and ask the part or parts of you that is responsible for this behavior if they would be willing to identify themselves.

You can call out,

Hey part or parts,

Whoever is responsible for this behavior that I would like to change,

Can you please identify yourself?

You can jump,

You can raise your hand,

You can run,

You can dance,

Hold out a banner,

However they'd like to be identified,

That's okay.

And please let them know that they are safe.

Everybody is safe.

Nobody will ever get fired or be left out.

Please ask that part once they've identified themselves,

Are you willing to communicate with me in consciousness?

And what that means is,

Are you willing to communicate with me today where I can hear you and see you and feel you?

Because our parts are used to communicating with us on a subconscious level.

If they are not willing to communicate with you,

Let them know,

It's okay,

I understand.

They have been doing so much work for you,

You have been doing so much work for me,

Part,

And I haven't been here in however long,

And it must be a shock to see me.

We are the CEO of all our parts.

And so maybe it's a little shocking for all these employees to see management come up after probably a long time.

Let them know that you know,

You are their number one priority.

And you respect and honor all the work they do for you.

And once they've accepted or allowed themselves to communicate with you,

Please thank them for that.

Thank you,

Part.

And once they've accepted or allowed themselves to communicate with you,

Thank them for being willing to communicate with me.

If there is more than one part responsible for that behavior you would like to change,

Please ask those parts to choose a spokes part,

A spokesperson,

Just so it's easy to communicate with one.

And please thank them for their willingness to communicate.

Now we're going to elicit the positive intention.

Please remind this part.

I know that you have a positive intention.

And ask that part.

What is your positive intention for me?

What do you want for me,

I wonder?

There is the behavior that we would like to change.

And then there is the positive intention.

So try and find out what is that positive intention.

Now validate that positive intention.

Let them know,

Oh,

Thank you.

So you've been trying so hard to get this positive intention.

And that's why this behavior is here.

You've been doing such a good job to keep this positive intention.

And maybe you've never even been appreciated for it.

So thank you,

Part.

I wonder if you could take a moment now,

Let your part know,

To try and separate the intention from the methods it's been using.

You can say thank you for the intention.

The behavior is different.

Behaviors are tools to get to that positive intention.

And thank you,

Part,

For having done such a wonderful job in fulfilling its positive intention for all this time.

Now please ask the part to offer a representation of a younger you,

The youngest you that this part knows of,

That put them on the job.

So there's a part of you that's very young,

Most likely very young,

That asks this part to fulfill this positive intention.

Allow that visual representation of that younger you that asks this to be fulfilled.

And please ask that part,

What did that younger you ask it to do?

Ask that part for the old contract that they might have signed,

A piece of paper or any form of original contract that might have started with make sure that.

.

.

Ask that part to read out the contract to you or show it to you.

This is the contract that your part signed by your younger self when your younger self asked it.

To fulfill the positive intention.

Now please ask that part,

In your professional opinion,

What would have happened to that younger you if they hadn't responded to your request and done such a wonderful job?

So what would have happened if that part didn't take on that job of trying to fulfill the positive intention?

Now please ask that part,

Hey part,

How old do you think I am?

Now we're going to play a movie for this part and for all the parts that's there.

Allow for a screen to show up and in that screen,

Please show the movie of your life today.

Show them how old you are,

Show them the life you are living today,

Your day to day.

And if you know what a picture in picture is,

Where in a screen,

There's a smaller screen on the screen showing another picture or another movie.

Allow for a picture in picture to show up.

A video on a video.

And in that second smaller video in the corner,

Please show your part and all your parts how your life has been with this behavior that you would like to change.

How is it affecting you?

Is your life difficult because of it?

Are you unable to get certain things or goals because of it?

So on one screen,

Show them your life today and in the smaller screen,

Show them how this behavior affects your life.

Now please ask that part,

If there were other ways to accomplish your positive intention that in your opinion would work as well as or better than this old behavior,

Would you be interested in these ways?

Would you be willing to try something new that still fulfills the positive intention?

If you get a no response,

Just continue showing them that movie of how that old behavior is not serving you anymore.

And now we're going to call on another part.

We're going to call your creative parts.

So whoever you have been speaking to just now,

You can ask them to please sit down.

You'll call them back again in a few moments and please thank them for being willing to be here and to talk to you today.

And now we're going to invite the creative parts of you.

You can get on a microphone again or however way you'd like to call them.

Hey,

Creative parts,

Please come down to the front of wherever you are,

The hall,

The meeting room,

The theater.

Let them know that you have a special project for them.

And creative parts like to come with a bang sometimes.

Sometimes they come with a dance or however creative way they'd like to show up,

Allow them that.

And if they're just walking normally,

That's great too.

When I call on my creative parts,

They come in different ways.

Sometimes they come as the ocean.

Sometimes they come as acrobats.

So however your creative parts wants to show up,

Let them.

Now please thank them for being here.

Thank you for participating.

Let them know,

I have a special project for you,

Creative parts.

Can you please come up with at least three new behaviors that they think will work as well as or better than the old methods to fulfill the positive intention of and whatever that positive intention is.

You don't have to know what these new behaviors are going to be.

We can let the professionals handle it.

The creative parts will handle it for you.

And if they have more than three,

Then that's good too.

So just give them a moment to huddle up together and come up with three or more new behaviors and methods to fulfill the positive intention.

And when that's done,

Please allow the creative parts and that first part that you were speaking to,

Some privacy.

Allow the creative part to give this part,

These new methods.

So you can just look away for a moment,

Maybe step out of the room,

Because you don't need to know what these new methods are going to be.

And when that feels good,

You can come back into the room where they all are and say,

Thank you so much,

Creative parts.

Thank you for these new methods and behaviors.

And we can come back talking to the first part we were speaking to.

You can ask them to come back up on stage or wherever you guys are talking and let them know,

Thank you so much for receiving these new methods.

And please ask this part now.

Are you willing to take responsibility for using these new choices,

Methods or behaviors at the appropriate times and in the appropriate places to fulfill its positive intention for a trial period?

So just for a trial period,

Please think of an appropriate amount of time,

Whether that's one week,

One month,

Two months,

Whatever feels good to you both.

This trial period is so that everyone involved in this important function can evaluate how well these new choices work.

After the trial period,

If the part that used to do the old behavior does not think that these new choices work as well as or better than the old way,

It can always go back to the old way.

And please thank that part once again.

Thank you so much for being here and for being willing to try these new methods.

And if this feels good to you,

You can thank everyone by providing them some treats,

Food,

A party,

However way they would like to spend their time.

Sometimes companies throw a party at the end of the year.

You can give them a big bang party or just some treats and snacks,

Whatever they all want.

And say thank you again everyone for coming to this meeting today.

And before they all go,

Please ask the audience,

Is there any part here that objects to having any of these new choices used in addition to continuing to have the old choices and behaviors available?

If there is an objection,

Validate how wonderful that communication is because that is exactly what we want to know about now.

Please ask that part to identify where it is in the hall and validate the positive intention of that part.

And you can do this all over again.

You can validate their positive intention.

Ask what its concerns are.

Call in the creative part and negotiate an agreement that will allow the new choices to be tried out.

And when that feels good,

You can thank everyone again.

Thank you.

Thank you so much for being here.

Thank you so much for communicating with me today.

And you can let everyone go if they are ready or you can leave or you can all stay and party together.

Now we're going to do a test.

Please take a minute and imagine a situation coming up in which you might have a chance to try out one or more of these new behaviors.

Go out there in time and just road test this a little.

How does it go?

And again,

Thank all the parts that have been participating with us in this.

All the parts that we know about and also the ones who continue to support this change behind the scenes.

If this old behavior comes back,

It's just a signal that we need to create more alternatives,

More and better choices for the part of you that wants this positive intention.

And take a deep breath and breathe out.

And thank you.