Worrying Explored

Today we are talking about worrying. You can worry or pray, but you can't do both at the same time. We discuss how to deal with anxiety, why anxiety can cause suffering, and more. #ScaredTalking

Transcript

Welcome to Life,

Lessons,

And Laughter with your host Glenn Ambrose.

Hello!

Welcome to the podcast.

We're going to sing this whole episode.

No,

We're not.

We should do a musical episode.

Oh my God.

Not this one.

As long as you and Dave do it and I just like go doo-wop in the background.

Why?

Wait,

Why do Dave and I have to do it?

I'm as bad as you are.

No.

No,

I beg to differ.

You've been on stage singing before.

And not gotten things thrown at you.

So,

That's what you have one leg up on me.

The show that you did see though,

Someone did get something thrown at them that time.

Well,

Anyway,

We're not going to worry about that.

Because we're talking about worry.

Oh my God.

You didn't even notice that?

What a transition.

Yeah,

You're welcome.

Oh,

Two years and you're finally a professional broadcaster.

Yeah,

That's it.

I get my card tomorrow.

It's your fourth miracle you've performed today.

I know.

I'm like just showing off at this point.

I'm just,

I'm like surpassing canonization.

I'm just like it's.

.

.

I'm going to get double canonized.

Rewind,

Rewind.

Okay,

So all right.

Let's not worry about how weird this in general has been.

Way to wreck the transition.

But then I just used it again.

Yeah,

But it's too late.

It was perfection.

This is going to be one of those shows where the first 15 minutes is nothing.

Nothing.

Okay,

Let's just jump into it.

It's been like three probably.

So yeah,

So we're talking about why worry is useless.

So there's one of my favorite sayings is you can't pray and worry.

You got to pick one.

See,

I.

.

.

Okay.

I feel like most people pray when they are worried.

But then,

Which is fine.

Once you,

If you get worried about something and you pray,

Well,

You have to stop worrying after that.

Because if you don't,

Then you're really not believing in your prayer.

And if you're not believing in your prayer,

Then it's really not going to work.

So you have to put your faith in your prayer for it to actually work.

So don't pray and worry.

You know,

You got to pick one.

Yeah.

You feel me?

I do.

I see the wheels turning.

But if I'm worrying because I'm praying because I'm worrying,

Then I'm actively doing something.

Right.

But I'm still worried.

Not after you.

.

.

Not once you stop praying.

You can't technically worry and pray at the same time.

It's two different energies.

It's like being happy and sad at the same time.

You just can't do it.

But I'm still very scared as I'm praying.

Then you're not really praying.

If you're scared while you're praying,

Then you're not praying.

You're just talking scared.

Prayer is.

.

.

Talking scared.

Yeah.

You're just.

.

.

And you're calling it praying.

That's really the whole point of it is that people.

.

.

When people pray,

They're not actually praying,

But they call it prayer.

That when,

You know,

People.

.

.

If you're actually walking in faith,

Then you're not worried.

If you actually hand it over to God,

Then you don't have something to worry about.

So if you don't have anything to worry about,

Why would you be worried?

I mean,

Like with myself,

I'll see certain things.

Like let's say.

.

.

Let's say I'm looking into the future and I don't know how some business deal is going to turn out.

Or I don't know.

.

.

Something gets a hold of me and I start worrying about it.

If I start worrying about something and I notice that I'm worrying about it,

And then I hand it over,

Then I have to stop worrying about it.

It's done.

I have to remind myself.

And usually,

Like I give myself little talkings too.

Because I need them sometimes.

So like if I have to.

.

.

If I'm worrying about something,

Like.

.

.

And I go,

Oh,

Well,

Is this.

.

.

You know,

How's this going to work out with my business?

And I go,

Wait a minute.

So God created the entire world,

The whole universe,

Everyone in it,

And all this stuff.

And supposedly that,

You know,

I believe in this and I have faith in this and all this stuff.

And God did all that stuff,

But he can't figure out one of my little business deals.

He can't handle making that work out in my highest good.

So I need to jump in there and worry about it and try to,

You know,

Control it and all that stuff.

That doesn't make any sense to me,

You know,

When you look at it from that perspective.

Generally,

We don't take a step back far enough from our problems to look at it from that perspective.

You know,

Like another one of my things is don't.

.

.

One of my favorite like little quotes is,

Don't.

.

.

Stop telling your problems.

.

.

Stop telling God how big your problems are.

Right.

And start telling your problems how big your God is.

You know,

We're always going to God and going,

Oh my God,

Look at.

.

.

I have all these difficulties and it's so horrible and please help and please help.

Well,

Just look at the problems and go,

You know what?

I got this awesome God here that can handle all this stuff.

So I'm really not worried about you.

You know,

That's the flip flop of the mentality that we're talking about.

Definitely.

You hear me barking,

Big dog?

From my experience,

Our God is an awesome God.

Oh no.

He reigns.

From heaven above.

With wisdom,

Power and love,

My God is an awesome God.

No,

That.

.

.

All right,

So this makes sense.

I don't think that.

.

.

I think that 90% of the time that I've ever prayed in my life,

I was just scared talking.

Which is a realization.

That's a new term.

Scared talking?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Make T-shirts.

Yeah.

Yeah.

We'll make a little meme on Facebook.

There we go.

Don't scared talk.

Pray.

Yeah.

I like it.

Sold.

I'll buy that.

I'll sell it.

And now I'm worried that no one's going to buy our T-shirts.

Oh,

Nobody will buy the great love T-shirts because they'll love those.

Yes.

So another.

.

.

What kind of got me talking about this was a calendar that I have from Esther and Jerry Hicks asking it is given.

I love Esther and Jerry Hicks.

They.

.

.

Yes.

Amazing information.

Yes.

They really are.

They're very deep.

They give deep spiritual information.

And also what day of the week it is.

Yeah.

Because it's a calendar.

Which is just a bonus.

Yeah.

In case you didn't know,

It's August 30th.

And I just pulled back the curtain again because this isn't going to air on August 30th.

It is September.

.

.

Go ahead.

Get it.

Go get it.

18th.

Maybe.

Anyway,

So it's August 30th.

And it says,

No matter whether you worry or rejoice in your virtual reality,

You set up a vibration that the law of attraction matches.

So whether you spend your time worrying or rejoicing,

That is a pattern that you're setting up,

A vibrational rate that you're setting up that is going to bring more of the same.

So whatever emotion you're feeling,

If you stay in that,

You're going to get more of it.

So if you walk around worrying,

It's going to attract more things to worry about.

If you walk around rejoicing,

It's going to bring more things to rejoice about.

I worry constantly.

Yeah.

And you probably started worrying like 20 years ago and then it attracted more and attracted more and attracted more until you're worrying constantly.

Let's see.

I'm going to be 29,

20 years.

Yeah,

No,

That's accurate.

So,

Um,

Bam.

So you're welcome.

That was that.

That one's on the house.

Uh,

What is the relationship between worry and anxiety?

It's right there,

Man.

It's like one in the same.

All right.

I have a question.

Um,

Now when I'm busy,

I don't tend to worry.

Right.

That's called distraction.

Like it's Tuesday right now.

Before last Thursday,

I had had a busy seven or eight weeks.

Right.

It hasn't gotten bad yet,

But in just the last four days,

I've already felt the beginning of anxiety creeping back in.

Yeah.

Yeah,

That's it's distraction.

That's honestly,

That's a lot of the tools we have to function in society are really poor tools that,

Well,

They never really fix anything and they never really bring us to happiness,

But they do work to some degree.

They're very surface level and distraction is one of the most common ones.

I mean,

You know,

Well,

You know,

Look at everybody running around,

Staying so busy in our society.

And then,

You know,

This has been coming up a lot lately too,

Is,

Is that the understanding that society is made up of people.

So you know,

If there are our outer world is a reflection of our inner world.

So if my,

If inside I'm all confused and messed up and angry,

Well,

My outer world is going to have confusion and anger in it and stuff like that.

If I'm at peace on the inside,

My outer world is going to have a lot of peace.

You know,

That's a small microcosm.

Well,

It works the same way in society.

So if we have,

If society is made up of people and the majority of people are angry and confused inside,

Then that society is going to have a lot of anger and confusion going on in it.

And that's basically what we're seeing now.

But a lot of people are running around and they're going,

You know,

This is the,

Be the change you wish to see in the world.

The only thing we can change is ourselves.

So everybody's running around distracting themselves and really not doing the inner work and not really not changing anything within themselves.

And then they watch the news and they go,

See those bad people?

Look at all the bad things that are happening in this world.

Isn't it horrible?

It's just the reflection of what's going on inside of them.

You know,

So if as more people do,

And I'm seeing more and more of this,

This is the good news as more and more people are listening to these podcasts and doing some,

Some core work on themselves and,

And finding that peace within,

Then we're getting more of a majority of the society and then our society will start shifting when more people are at peace.

So that's,

You know,

That,

That's kind of what's going on.

So we need to,

We need to stop distracting ourselves by just staying busy and start dealing with the stuff that's bouncing around inside of us when we get still.

It's one of the reasons why meditation is so important.

It's not just to train your mind to slow down,

But just stopping and sitting still for 10,

15 minutes.

A lot of times,

If you just do that,

You're going to get very,

Very uncomfortable.

And that's because all the stuff that you've been pushing down by keeping yourself distracted and moving around 90 miles an hour will bubble up when you sit still.

That's why people don't like to sit still.

People don't just,

You know,

Just sit there for 10 minutes.

Oh no,

I got to do something.

I can't sit still.

Why?

Well,

It's because when you're not distracting yourself,

Those emotions that you've been pushing down and suppressing start bubbling up.

How do you avoid that?

You just stay busy.

I mean,

To a certain extent,

I have to stay busy anyway for other reasons,

But I have another month where it's less schedule-wise.

So how do I avoid turning that into stupid anxiety attacks and worry and stuff in the next month?

Well,

And that's exactly part of the problem is we're looking to avoid it.

How do I not feel?

So I should just bring them on.

Yeah.

Let's do it.

Yeah.

So go purposely sit still and allow those feelings and anxieties and emotions to come up so they can release.

All our emotions and feelings that we've pushed down and that we refuse to allow ourselves to feel are messages.

So they were there originally.

They were sent to give us a message like something isn't heading in the right direction or there's something you need to look at in your life.

They came here to give us a message,

But we've never allowed ourselves to feel them.

So they're trapped down inside.

And if you let them up and out and you allow yourself to feel them,

They'll just automatically release.

So you're saying that anxiety is a.

.

.

It's basically.

.

.

A mix of feelings that have been repressed.

Right.

It's trapped emotion.

The trapped emotion that has to get out.

Right.

Yeah.

It's trapped emotion because you're never.

.

.

The feeling of anxiety is coming up because there's emotion that's trapped within you trying to get out.

It's trying to release.

It's trying to get out and it's pushing.

Feelings are energy.

It's just like anything else.

And what happens when you trap energy is starts spinning on itself and it starts pushing outward on its container until it finds a way out.

So anxiety is telling.

.

.

It's just like everything else.

It's telling you that something is off.

So it's telling you that there's something within you that needs to be felt and you're repressing it.

So when you open up to it and allow it to go by allowing yourself to feel it.

The trick is,

Is like if you do do this and you sit there and you feel these emotions is just to allow yourself to feel it and let go of the story.

Sometimes a story will come up with your emotions.

And if you just keep being like,

Yeah,

That person's a real jerk and you keep.

.

.

You're building more negative emotions for the ones that you're releasing.

So you're not really making any ground.

So if you just feel the emotion,

Feel it as a physical sensation,

Feel the anxiety as a physical sensation.

So what does this feel like?

Oh,

It feels like a tightness in my chest.

Okay.

Well,

That's.

.

.

The biggest thing about anxiety attacks and panic attacks is that they feel really bad.

They feel really dangerous,

But they're really not.

I've had panic attacks.

I know a lot of people that have.

So.

.

.

Yeah,

They feel very frightening.

Yeah.

But that's the problem is if we feed into it and go,

Oh my God,

There's something wrong and we start heading down that direction,

That's when it gets worse and it's horrible.

But technically,

A panic attack isn't going to hurt you.

Especially if you just accept that it's happening and you go,

Okay,

I know what this is.

This is a panic attack.

I'm okay.

It's just some physical sensations that my body's having because there's some fear and worry inside of me.

When you just recognize it for what it is and then it just starts dissipating because you allow yourself to feel it.

But when you resist it,

That's when it gets worse.

So all emotions are like that.

So it's a matter of just noticing it and going,

Okay,

I'm all right.

My heart's pounding.

My chest feels tight.

This is what that feels like.

We've all been sick.

We've all had a cold or the flu or something.

Not me.

No,

I'm sure.

So we've all experienced a situation where we've been nauseous from something and there really wasn't anything we could do to change it.

So when that happens,

We don't fight it.

We go,

Oh,

I'm sick.

So I feel nauseous.

So we sit there and we go,

Okay,

I feel nauseous.

We don't resist it.

We just kind of sit there with it because there's nothing we can do and we understand that.

Yeah,

You have to.

So it's the same thing when you feel nauseous about other stuff.

When you feel nauseous,

When you feel an emotion and sometimes it'll feel nauseous or sometimes it'll feel like tension in your head or tension in your heart.

Like if you feel that and you just go,

Oh,

Well,

It's just a feeling.

It's not going to hurt me.

And just allow yourself to feel it and sit with it.

Then it becomes felt and it goes away.

But what we do,

As soon as we feel something uncomfortable,

We try to fix it or push it down or run from it or distract ourselves from it.

Of course I do.

I want it to be fixed and over with immediately and I want to go back to having fun.

Yeah,

Right.

But all you're doing.

.

.

What did you just say?

Yeah,

Right.

Because it doesn't work that way.

That's like sitting there and getting really upset when you're sick and I'm nauseous.

Oh my God,

I can't believe and I can't feel like this and starting to freak out and panic and try to push it away.

It's just not going to work.

If you're resisting the anxiety,

You're creating suffering by resisting what is.

Exactly.

Oh my God.

I've listened to this podcast before.

I know what I'm listening to.

Yeah,

There we go.

And the light bulb goes on.

All suffering is resistance to what is.

I will text you a bunch tonight when I am having an anxiety attack and can't figure out what to do.

Just put it all in an email instead of 32 texts.

I will text you individually each sentence,

Glenn.

No.

David and I were talking about that a little way here.

Oh really?

Yeah.

You text like an old person.

I am an old person.

There you go.

I text appropriately for my age.

Thank you.

That's not the first time I've heard that.

That's not like 10 cents per text anymore,

Right?

Or is it for you?

No.

You used to work for a cell phone company,

Didn't you?

Yeah.

Get a better plan,

Man.

No,

I got a good plan.

I'm all golden.

All right.

Then you text like an old person.

We've established this.

So I will send you 32 texts describing my anxiety.

Okay.

And I will mute my phone.

And then we'll read them on the next podcast.

Don't worry.

I'm not going to really be happy.

Dave,

Can we insert here,

You say,

Don't worry,

Be happy,

Like surrender.

We may have,

Don't worry,

Be happy interlude singing at this moment right now.

And we're back.

I hope you enjoyed it.

I don't know if it'll be funnier now if it is in there.

Yeah,

Really.

If it's not in there,

It might be funnier.

Like oh crap.

So now should we do like another pause now?

Okay.

So now we're actually going to have the interlude for Dave singing,

Don't worry,

Be happy.

Ready?

Go.

And we're back.

He did it that time.

That was great.

Yeah,

That was awesome.

Thanks God,

Dave,

For stepping up.

Did you say thanks God?

Thanks God.

Thank God Dave stepped up.

I don't know where I was going with that.

Don't inflate his ego any more than it needs to be.

Dave,

You are God.

So that concludes our musical portion of the show.

It's a musical episode.

Was that the episode?

This is as close to a musical episode as we're getting.

Don't worry,

I will not be singing.

Back to not worrying.

See how I did that,

Dave?

I mean,

Ben.

Wow.

Wow.

Not only are you looking at me.

God,

Dave,

Ben.

I have to stop saying names obviously.

I'm not good at that.

Are you sad that the six weeks of just you and Dave,

Every two times a week are over?

No.

And I'm back.

It's all good.

I just change no matter which direction it goes.

Truth.

Truth,

Man.

All right.

So I think that's going to wrap it up.

Well,

You got to sing still.

So you got to sing.

So all right.

A couple things.

Glenn.

Yeah.

Where can people find you?

Well,

Not yet.

Let's talk for a minute.

Should we look up some places?

Some quotes on worrying?

Yeah.

I will leave my email address if I can think of the name of it.

And you get us a good quote or two.

All right.

Okay.

So you guys can find me at life-enhancement-services.

Com.

And check out thegreatloveproject.

Com also.

And I just dawned on me,

Like,

If people listen to this as the first one,

They're going to be like,

These guys don't know what the heck they're doing,

Man.

They were all over the place.

So it's not usually this scattered,

But hey,

You know,

Let's go with it.

It was fun.

Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow.

It only saps today of its joy.

Whoa.

Leo Bascaglia.

Oh,

Bascalia.

Whatever.

Yeah.

He was famous like in the 80s or something,

I think.

90s.

Worry often gives small things a big shadow.

Yeah.

Turning molehills into mountains.

Right.

That is a Swedish proverb.

If you want to test your memory,

Try to recall what you were worrying about one year ago today.

There you go.

Yeah.

You know,

That's actually one thing that I do with clients is I'll have them write down like 10 things they're worried about and put it in an envelope with a date on it and open it up like a week later and then look at the list.

And usually about seven or eight out of the 10 things that they were worried about just kind of fix themselves.

I got a text right before we started this podcast from a friend who ironically we were all talking about that said it was a time hop and it said,

I'm so stressed out,

But it was from nine years ago.

And she was like,

What was I possibly stressed out about nine years ago?

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's it.

It's because we bring our problems so close to us and we don't take a step back from them and give them some distance and perspective.

You know,

We get so freaked out about what's happening at this moment.

Right.

Like it's going to last or something.

I have another quote.

I've got 99 problems and 86 of them are completely made up scenarios in my head that I'm stressing about for absolutely no logical reason.

You know,

I've heard that before.

Yup.

And that's the truth of the matter.

Dave,

Dave sent me that one.

People become attached to their burdens sometimes more than the burdens are attached to them.

That was George Bernard Shaw.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That's,

That's it.

It's like the worrying is like paying interest on money that you haven't gotten yet.

You know,

It's,

It's like we're sitting there,

The,

The problem hasn't even occurred yet or the situation or the scenario hasn't occurred and we're worried all the way up to it and it hasn't even happened yet.

So I mean,

A lot of our worry is just wasted energy.

It just,

It's a waste of time,

Quite frankly.

This is my favorite one.

So I'm going to wrap up on this one.

It's Winston Churchill.

He's always good for a quote.

When I look back on all these worries,

I remember the story of the old man who said on his death bed that he had a lot of trouble in his life.

Most of which had never happened.

Yeah.

Truth.

Yeah.

Most of the time it doesn't.

And I'm going to drop this mic and we're going to take it off of the stand and then I'm going to drop it and then we're done.

I highly doubt it.

These are expensive mics.

They are.

But it's true,

Most of the stuff that we worry about never even happens.

So there's just,

Yeah,

Another reason not to bother worrying.

Don't waste your time,

People.

And if there's nothing else that you take from this ridiculously laugh written episode,

You cannot pray and worry at the same time.

Yeah.

So pick one.

And if you're worrying while you're praying,

You're just hashtag scared talking.

Yes.

Exactly.

We can't top that.

See you later.

Reviews

Some very good points made. Now if I can just tell myself that! Thank you!

Funny one 😊 thank you 💜x

Some good food for thought about anxiety and worrying!

More Salinas than usual, but a great message. Thank you!