Using Momentum - L,L,&L W/ Glenn Ambrose

Implementing change is much more effective when using momentum. Consistent effort produces an energy of momentum that can carry us through difficult times and reinforce the new ways of interacting with life during our journey. Getting lost in the work and waking up realizing you've changed is a wonderful way to experience change!

Transcript

Welcome to Life Lessons and Laughter with your host, Glenn Ambrose. Hello, Everybody. We're going to discuss using momentum today. So I will jump right into it. I might try to keep this one a little bit shorter, Which I always try to do, But I actually have a client in 45 minutes, So that's going to make me. So that's good. Yeah, So this topic came up and it comes up every once in a while, And I realized I don't believe I've ever done a podcast on it. And the initial way I was exposed to this was when I woke up, And I really feel that it was an instrumental part in me waking up and also the intensity in which I woke up. So let's see if I can get these shadows different a little. So there we go. Yeah, So when I went through the 12 steps in Alcoholics Anonymous, That's when I woke up spiritually. And of course, Yes, I got sober, And I haven't drank in almost 21 years now, Which is wonderful. But it was more than that. It was more than just the drinking. I blew open spiritually and started just seeing life differently. And it took me a couple of years to acclimate back to reality. I mean, I was still working and functioning and stuff, But I was just so swept up in this. It was a really beautiful time. And then even years after that of absorbing information from other teachers and developing my own style in teaching and stuff like that. But the initial was really like three months, And I blew open to most of the knowledge that I already have, Or I would say the wisdom that I actually have. Most of the wisdom that I woke up to, It happened in those three months. And like I said, I had to learn to understand it because it was all like conceptual. Like I just got it inside of me very deeply. And I didn't even understand a lot of it intellectually yet. So it took me a while to understand it intellectually and all that stuff. But I think that momentum played a big part in that. And I've talked about this because there is like in the recovery arena, There's lots of ways of doing things, Which I think for the most part is good. You know, Like not one way works for everyone. So you got to find what works for you. It's just, I've seen in recovery as well as in every area of life, Most people want to do it their way. Most people want to do it the easy way. They want to find shortcuts. It's, You know, Let's just ease into this. Hey, I'm not really sure. Which is a natural defense, But it doesn't serve you when you're trying to change. Because it's like you're trying to steal second base with your foot on first. It just can't be done. You have to let go of the old way in order to get to the new way. So, You know, So I'm going to explain my perspective on this. What I would like to say upfront is that I do understand that my perspective is not the only perspective. I talk passionately about what seems to be effective and truthful and helpful from my perspective. So just know ahead of time that I'm just going to let myself go like I usually do. And if you think it should be done another way, Then do it the other way. It's okay. You don't have to agree with me. I'm just going to explain my perspective and why I think my perspective is useful and helpful to people. At the end of the day, We all have to choose what we're going to do. So the reason I say that is just because I have a feeling that I'm going to be kind of, It's going to sound like I'm trashing other ways. And if it sounds like that, Believe that the only purpose it sounds like that is because I'm trying to draw a comparison between two ways. I'm trying to take what I've seen in my experience and say, Okay, This is what I have seen work and this is what I've seen not work. And I think that this is why, Okay, Still doesn't mean I'm right. Um, If it resonates with you, Cool. If it doesn't, That's okay too. You know, You again, You've got the right to decide to do it, This go through whatever the heck you want as slowly as you want. And, And there, There are aspects, And I'll just touch on this briefly. There are times when, Um, Slowing down is good. Like, So for me, I'll give you one example. Um, When I, I got this poll to learn energy work. So I started looking into this energy work and I was surprised because I was really, I saw myself as more of a spiritual teacher than somebody that did energy work, But I kept feeling this pull. So I followed it and I decided to go with Reiki. So I got attuned to Reiki and a lot of people were like saying, You know, Glenn, You probably have to let it settle in. Sometimes you have to let it settle in and resonate and stuff. And, Uh, Right after I got Reiki one, I went, No, No, I want Reiki too. I'm ready. I want Reiki too. And, Um, So I did now that was no surprise to me because that's kind of how I am. I'm more of an action taker. Um, So it's, It's like, Yeah, No, Let's do it. And I assumed that I would get Reiki, You know, Uh, Three or four, What, You know, Some people do it in three levels. Some, Some people do it in four levels. Um, But I figured I'd go all the way with Reiki, Be a Reiki master. I'd probably go on to, Uh, Corona. I think that might have two levels. I'd probably do that just because of that's how I usually function. If I'm going to lean into something, Usually I lean all the way and why not? Right. So I got Reiki one, No, Ready for Reiki two. I got attuned to Reiki two. And then all of a sudden it just, I thought whenever I thought about Reiki three, I was just like, Eh, And I knew I wasn't scared. I knew I wasn't holding myself back. I expected myself to take Reiki three. That's how I knew that the fact that I didn't feel like I wanted to take Reiki three should be followed. And I wasn't lying to myself because it like, I assumed I would take Reiki three. So there was no resistance. Like I would, There was no fear holding me back. There was no rationalization going, Well, You know, Maybe I should take my time. I, You know, Hey, You told me I have to process stuff, Right? Like there was none of that going on inside of me. I expected to take Reiki three, But it just didn't feel right. So I waited and I was like, Oh, Maybe this is what people were talking about, People were talking about, About the resonating and stuff, You know, Letting it settle in. And, Uh, Then, You know, Three months, Six months, A year later, A year and a half later, Two years later, I still, Every time I checked in, I, I, I did not have this urge to this feeling that I should take Reiki three. So I never did. And that was, I don't know how many years ago that was, You know, Maybe 15 years ago, Or maybe not quite somewhere around there. So I didn't, You know, So my point is, Is it's, You know, Sometimes it's hard to be honest with ourselves. We rationalize so, So, So, So well, And that's what we need to watch out for throughout the rest of this podcast and moving forward. Okay. There are times I believe that, That, Uh, Implementing stuff is more important than learning it. So I do believe that taking your time enough to process and implement things is gigantically important. So I'm not saying to, To not take the time to implement that you need. There are times when you need to take the time to implement. I'm just saying that a lot of times momentum plays a big factor and we don't have to play it so safe. Okay. So now I'll get, You know, That's my little other side of the coin kind of explanation. And I think the rest of this podcast is going to be about the, You know, Using that momentum, Keep that in mind, But, But most people go too far in that direction. Most people, You know, Take years to do things that they don't need to take years to do things. And quite honestly, I think that's one of the main reasons why it's less effective. They take too much time. So what I mean by that is when you're learning something new, Consistency is important. Why? Because we have the external world or our old way of doing things or our norm already in place. So to replace our current normal with a new normal, It takes consistency. If you lean into something, You know, A couple hours a week, And then the rest of your week, You're just doing things the old way. And then you do a little more, A couple hours next week. And then the rest of your time is spent living the old way. Like it's just, To me, It's just not enough to really shift anything. And I think that this is why people go through processes of change and they never quite get there. Like I've noticed that with my coaching clients, I see my coaching clients twice a month. And as a general rule, Every once in a while, I'll make exceptions for existing clients that have been with me for a long time. But as a general rule, Sometimes I see people and I try to meet them where they are, Right? So sometimes people are having financial difficulties. And, You know, I try to meet them where they are, But sometimes it's just like, It's not realistic. So it's like, Okay, Let's, So they want to try once a month instead of twice a month. I found that when people are in the middle of change, That is not good. It's just not enough. Twice a month is barely enough. Like, If I could talk to people every week, Which I have, You know, Some people do work with me weekly, Those people's success rates are through the roof. They change their lives in, I would say, Sometimes six months, Six to nine months, I would say they really blow the doors off and really make huge changes in that period of time. Whereas people that are working with me twice a month instead of every week, Their changes, Assuming they are applying things really effectively, I would say it's more like, I don't know, A year to a year and a half where they've really changed their lives. But that varies a lot. With my clients that work with me twice a month, It varies a lot because it's just, It's the implementation piece. It's like, How much work are you doing when you're not with me? The people that get on a call with me two weeks later and start telling me all the different ways they applied what we talked about in the previous phone call, Those people really drive themselves. They're very self-motivated. Their changes sometimes can almost even, Or actually, I'm not even going to say almost, They can mimic the people who are talking with me every week. It can be that fast where they change their whole lives in six to nine months. That's somewhat rare. Usually, It does take a little bit longer. But that varies a lot. It depends on the personality. It's the self-motivation. See, When you stretch it out more, There's more variables that come into play. How self-motivated you are comes into play. What you're doing in between sessions comes into play. Are you taking in too much information from too many different teachers while we're working together? Or have you slowed down taking in information and really try implementing what we talk about and maybe take in some information from one or two other teachers, But some people take in information from five, Six, Seven, Eight, Nine, Ten different teachers all at the same time. To me, It causes more confusion than it does good. The less consistency, The more variables, The easier it is to go off, The easier it is to stay stuck in your old norm. This is why I feel that momentum is so important. When I went through the 12 steps, I went through in about three months. That's fast to some people. There's my mind bell. Turn down my volume. That's fast. When I took people through the big book, The first 164 pages of the big book, That's how I used to teach it. I underlined this circle list, Just how I was taught. There's so many spiritual jewels in the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous. To me, It's like reading the Bible. It's just spiritual text. There's so many beautiful spiritual lessons in there. I couldn't help but touch on more of them. When I took people through, It was more like five, Six months. Maybe even got up to eight or nine maybe once or twice when I took groups through. I think personally with that particular program, It should be less than a year. This is just from my experience. I've seen lots of people take five years to write out their fourth step. What I see is suffering. That's my personal experience. I saw people who didn't have the tools. I don't want to make this just about recovery. This is just an example. People who don't consider themselves a recovering alcoholic or addict, Please just take a moment and understand that I'm talking about the dynamics of it. That's a good example. It's not just for that because everybody's addicted to something. We're all addicted to being busy, Sex, Relationships, Shopping, Prescription drugs, Social drugs, Our telephone, Social media. We're all out of balance, Man. I'm just talking about working on ourselves. That's all. You don't have to be an addict. Basically, Everybody's problem is the same as an addict's. The problem is the same. It's just we choose different solutions sometimes. The problem is where we are maladjusted to life. We don't function with life in a healthy way. We don't perceive it in a healthy way. We don't interact with it in a healthy way. That's being maladjusted to life. That's the problem. Alcoholics just use alcohol to medicate themselves. That's a solution. It's a solution with problems, But it's nonetheless a solution just like everybody else's solutions about staying busy all the time. It's a solution. If you keep moving, You don't feel the uncomfortability inside. Now, It's an effective solution and it doesn't have as many drawbacks as being an alcoholic, But it still has problems. You're too busy. You're stressed out all the time, Lowering your immune system, Causing you to get sick. You're depleted all the time. You're functioning at a 50% capacity, Whether you realize it or not. There's drawbacks to using. There's drawbacks to all poor solutions. That's what I'm talking about. When I would see people taking four years, How could you possibly have the skills that the 12 steps provide to deal with life if you haven't gone through the steps? You can't. If you are struggling to interact with life in a healthy way, Then you need to go through the process to get the tools to deal with life in a healthy way. If it's taking you four years, I couldn't stay sober that long. I could make it 60, 90 days of white knuckling it and suffering and struggling before I drank again. That was it. I needed the tools. I needed the steps. I couldn't stay sober. Some people cannot drink for four, Five, Six, 10, 15 years. They cannot drink, But white knuckle and suffer that whole time. I'm like, Oh, I know you can, But why would you when the solution is there, Man? Go through the process. Get it through. Use the momentum. I've seen this time and time again because sometimes I work with addicts and alcoholics that are in the program. It's just these steps get dragged on forever. It's not how the program was laid out. When the program was laid out, When the big book was written, Which lays out the program, They considered successful sobriety one year. One year. That means that they did the steps in a hell of a lot less than one year because the steps are the recovery program. People think nowadays that going to meetings is a recovery program. It's not. Sometimes they can help you stay sober and don't get me wrong. I think meetings have huge benefits in them, But that's not the program of recovery. The program recovery is the 12 steps, And I believe momentum really gets you from one thing to another. We think we have to understand everything, And again, I'm just using this as an example. I'm going to get off recovery in a minute, But we think we're supposed to intellectually understand everything. That doesn't work, And that might be another podcast. Self-knowledge doesn't work. We think if we understand what's wrong with us and what the solution is, Then we're good. Why? Because we learned that in school. That's how we're taught. That's when we were told we knew something. When a teacher taught you something and you could regurgitate it back to them in an effective manner, They said, Oh, You know it now. You're done. Stick a fork in you. You're done. You get it. Now, Look, You did it on a test. You regurgitated it back, So we're going to give you, Because you intellectually memorized it, So we're going to give you a good grade on your test, And when you do that enough, We're going to let you go to the next grade, So we think if we memorize intellectual information, Then we get it, And that's all we have to do, And we can move to the next level. That's not how interchange works, So we have to approach it differently. Interchange works by implementation, By living it, By experiencing it, So it's more energetic. It's more internal, So if we go implement something a little bit or we don't understand it fully intellectually, We're like, Well, I don't really understand it, So I better not move forward. It's like I, When I got sober, What was I? 35. I mean, I drank for 20 years almost daily, Definitely daily for the last, You know, I don't know, 10, But for the last five years, I was trying to maintain. The last two or three years, I was completely gone. I mean, I was doing drugs again. I was drinking daily. I could not, I literally couldn't stay sober. I mean, I was a complete mess. My body was shutting down. By the time I went through the steps, I was actually experiencing symptoms of wet brain, Like that's when your brain starts getting dehydrated from the alcohol over all these years. I know, Ironic wet brain dehydration, But whatever, That's what they call it. I was having trouble forming sentences, Like I was having trouble like making the connection from my brain out my mouth, Like I couldn't understand things. I was stuttering. I was developing a stutter, Like it was bad, And that's how I was when I went through those three months. The spiritual shifts that took place, The complete 180 in how I lived and looked at my life took place with me functioning at a very low level intellectually. I didn't understand half of what they were talking about, At least probably three quarters. I couldn't wrap my brain around stuff. I was in a fog all the time. I was messed up, Man. It wasn't intellectual understanding that did it. It was intention. It was effort. I wanted to die, So I put in 110% so I could either see if this worked or find out it didn't and then go off myself. That's all I wanted to do. I just wanted the suffering to end, And I would do anything to end it. I made myself do things that I didn't want to do, Because in the program, It says half measures avail us nothing. I perceived that, And I was taught that that means if you give it 90% effort, You don't get 90% of the results. You get zero. You have to give it 110% effort, Or else you get zero. I didn't want to go through this process, Have it not work, Know that I didn't give it 100%, And then have to start back at square one. I didn't have the energy for that. I just wanted the suffering to stop. I went all in all the way, And I didn't understand things intellectually, And I blew open. Blew open so profoundly. It was beautiful. I truly believe it was momentum going through, Okay, What's step one? What's step two? Do you get it? I kind of. How can you go? How can you go? I'm focused on something, So my brain can't click off and go back into specifics like that. 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. I'm just going to pull them up so I don't have to think. How's that? We admitted we were powerless over alcohol, That our lives had become unmanageable. Step two, Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. Okay, So how the heck came to believe a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity? How the heck are you going to fully do that in any period of time? If you don't have a belief in a power greater than yourself, Which I didn't, Which a lot of people don't, If you don't have an understanding and a belief in that, How are you going to all of a sudden come to believe? Oh, I just came to believe. Yeah. Okay. Step two. Yes, I fully got step two, So now I can go to step three. You can't. Most people can't. You can't be done, Fully done with step two before you go to step three. You can do some exercises. You can do some writing. You can have some conversations and try to get your brain around what a higher power is, Why you should believe in it, Stuff like that, But you can't actually fully believe in a power greater than yourself. Most people can't. I know I couldn't, So I'm not going to wait until I fully get that because I probably never will, And I'll never get to step three. You see, This is what I'm talking about. So momentum, It's the energy, It's just leaning in. I want this to change. I'm going to do it to the best of my ability. You have to slow down enough to do this stuff to the best of your ability, But you're never going to do it perfectly. It's energetically, It's wanting these changes, It's leaning into them, It's opening up and surrendering to them, It's giving, But that doesn't take time. That takes effort. You do it to the best of your ability and you do the next thing. So one of the reasons I'm doing this podcast is because I have a 10-part course out there that you can find. Search me. And I was just explaining to somebody, Sure, You want to take in the information, But I think momentum plays a part when we're going through change, Momentum. Oh, Okay, Take it seriously, Try to implement it, Don't skip it, Don't skip over it, But let one lesson feed off the previous lesson energetically. Don't try to wait until you grasp every aspect of it intellectually and you think that you fully got it and it's six months later and now you're ready to take the second step. The change isn't going to stick like that, In my opinion. It just doesn't. Maybe if you're going through a process, Do it two ways. Like what else you got to do? This type of work, And I'm talking about spiritual work now, Like I said, The recovery was just an example. So take whatever I said about recovery and implement that in self-growth, Spirituality, Whatever you want to call it. And that's what I'm talking about. Do it in that. So intellectual, Full intellectual understanding can be helpful if you happen to fully understand it, But it doesn't mean you got it conceptually. It doesn't mean that you're changing. So don't pretend that it means that. Don't put all the importance on intellectual understanding. Of course that's part of it sometimes, But it's not the most important thing. It's an energetic shift that you're trying to induce. Excuse me. So induce that energetic shift by leaning into it energetically and building some momentum. Okay, I'm doing this. All right, Do it. And I mean, Honestly, When I tune into this, I almost think it's better to not fully understand something. Like that's the energy I get. It's almost like if we understand something too fully intellectually, That's because we're leaning on the intellect too much. Like it feels to me, And I'm tuning into this now that like, If we want the change more than we're focused on the intellect, That's almost even better. Oh, I want this. I can't wait to take the next step. Give me more. Give me more. If this program or if this line of thinking gives me 356 tools, I want 356 tools. I don't want 347. I want all of them. Give me the tools. Give me, I want to change. I want this. Give me the tools. I literally used to say that like when I was in recovery, I'd be like, Bring it. Like give me the tools. Give me the tools. You guys talk about tools to deal with life. Give me all of them. Don't give me a starter set with half of them. Give me the damn tools so I can use them. So I'm sick of suffering, Right? It was that yearning to change that really fueled it, That allowed me to feed off that momentum and pull me forward, That desire to live differently. Let that pull you instead of your intellect. I want it. I'm sick of suffering. I want this. I want to be different. I want to interact with life differently. What do I need to do? I need to do that. Okay, I'll do that to the best of my ability. Now what? Now what do I do? Oh, I do. I need that. Okay, I'll do that. I'll do that to the best of my ability. Now what? Like, And it's not, It's not now what, In a way that like you let go of, You know, I'll just, I'll use numbers to kind of make my point. It's like I give lesson one and you take it in and you start implementing it and then you're like, Okay, Okay, Now what? What's lesson two? That doesn't mean that you just drop lesson one and and you forget about it and you don't attempt to implement it in your life in the areas that lesson one applies. You bring that with you. You know, This is why momentum helps. I think people don't understand momentum because they might have a misunderstanding about it. Like the ego says momentum is rushing. Momentum is not rushing. The ego says momentum is going too fast and it's doing this and then jumping to the next and then jumping to the next. That's not momentum. Momentum is pulling, It's a wave. You don't let go, Excuse me, You don't let go of lesson one when you're starting lesson two or three. You bring it with you and you continue implementing it to the best of your ability as you also implement lesson two and as you also implement lesson three or whatever we talked about in your previous coaching session and then, You know, And then the last one and then the next one. You bring that with you and it's just constant movement, Constant implement more, Implement more, Implement more and what that does is, You know, It creates a flow of energy of change and it actually helps you because you're just used to changing. Now you're not so concerned about the old way. You're not even exposing yourself to your old normal that much because you're just so focused on different. I'm doing something different. I'm implementing different. Okay, Cool. Okay, Cool. And that's, There's a feeling you get with that. I call it being lost in the work. When you get lost in the work, That's a wonderful thing. That's how I see people succeed all the time. One of the biggest problems that hold people back is when they're the opposite of getting lost in the work is what I call keeping score too much. They're the kid in the back of this back of the car going, Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Oh, Did, You know, Oh, I tried implementing this. Did I get my results yet? Is my life changed yet? They're too focused on the future and if it worked yet and that's, If you're looking to try to see if it worked yet, That means that you're not focusing on the work. That's the problem and it's a huge problem. This whole, This hinders people's growth all the time and it's another reason why I think momentum is so important because if you're in the momentum, If you're lost in the work and your days consist of all this trying to implement this new stuff, This new stuff, This, Oh, I got new stuff. Yeah, I'm still kind of working on this, But I got this too and it's in succession. You know, This is why it's helpful to kind of work with one teacher to some degree. You don't want to pull in other stuff and, You know, Like I said, I mean, I don't have a problem with taking, You know, Listening to some other teachers sometime, But when you're working with somebody like or you're following somebody's teachings, Like dive into it and go with their flow and just ride that wave of energy, Implementation, Implementation. Okay, Now I have to implement this. Am I done implementing that? No, Of course not. I'm bringing that with me. I'm implementing that too, But I'm implementing this and I'm implementing this and you get lost in the work. You're just implementing and you're implementing and you're implementing and then all of a sudden you wake up one day and you're like, Oh my God, I'm different. When did this happen? Like you don't even know when it started. That's how it happened with me and a lot of people that I've seen successfully get sober is one day you wake up and you're like, Oh my God, Like there's a mind obsession over your drug of choice. You're constantly thinking and trying to combat that thinking and then all of a sudden one day you wake up and you're like, Oh my God, I didn't think about drinking yesterday. When, When did I don't, I don't think I thought about drinking the day before. I wonder when was the last time I thought about drinking. I used to think about drinking all day and then like for me I thought back and it was like, I don't know, Somewhere around a week or two weeks had passed and I couldn't remember about thinking about drinking for like two weeks I think. And I was, It was because I was so lost in the work. I didn't even realize when it stopped. That's a good thing because like when you constantly think are, Am I there yet? Did I get the change? You're actually kind of bringing the problem back in. You're giving fuel to the way you used to be. So ride that wave of momentum, Get lost in the doing, Let it pull you, Get obsessed almost with just change and doing things differently. And that's why it takes root a lot quicker and more effectively in my opinion. You know, So immerse yourself, You know, But the, The, The really think about it. Here's the opposite to this. Most people that I see where the frustration really comes when they're doing self work is when they've been working on themselves for a long period of time and they're not where they want to be, Right? That's, That's extremely frustrating. And you see it a lot and it's scary because that's where depression really starts coming in and hopelessness comes in. So it's, It's not a good place to be and it's very scary. So to avoid that, You get lost in the momentum, Lost in doing the work, Change, Change, Change. And then all of a sudden you wake up and you've changed, You know, If, If you're doing it piecemeal, You're probably doing it too slow. And that's why your frustration is happening. And this is why the change never fully takes place is because you give it a little bit of energy, But then 90% of your energy is going to, To just living the normal way. And then you give it a little bit more and it just, It has a very difficult time taking root. You know what I mean? Like, Think about, Think about a plant, You know, You stick a plant in the ground and it needs to get roots. Right. And let's say, You know, I'm going to try to bring it into this context. So like, Let's say you can only grow when it, When it gets energy, Like sun or water. So, So the, So the plant, You have this plant and it's like, It's, It gets, It gets light sunlight or water once every other day. So it starts to grow. And then it stalls a little, Then it starts to grow. And then it stalls a little, Then it starts to grow and it stalls a little, Whereas you've got a plant, You know, A little ways away where it gets the sun and the water every day. Consistently, That plant's going to grow better. Right. You know, I know that there's different types of plants, But bear with me. I'm trying to make a point. So, So like, That's what I mean. It's that consistency. It's just food, Food, Food, Implement, Food, Implement, Food, Implement, Ride that wave, Ride that wave. You're going to get a lot better results that way, In my opinion. Okay. So, So yeah, That's it. I got to fly and, I think I got the point across. It feels like I did. So use momentum peeps, Use the momentum. It's wonderful. It's a beautiful tool that I think we need to bring up more to the forefront to get more effective results. So, All right. Thanks for listening. And I will talk with you soon. Peace. Transcribed by https://otter. Ai