Commitment To Change

This episode is all about taking that big leap into who you want to become. Small steps are a terrific start, but eventually we all come to a place where we have to fully commit to the changes we want to make in our lives.

Transcript

Welcome to Life,

Lessons,

And Laughter with your host Glenn Ambrose.

Hello,

Hello,

Welcome to Life,

Lessons,

And Laughter with Glenn Ambrose.

How are you doing today,

Everyone?

Not you,

Ben,

How are you?

When I asked the audience.

I can't really hear the audience.

Can I answer?

They're not.

Okay,

Yeah,

All right,

We'll go to you.

Ben,

How are you doing today?

Well,

I haven't really thought about it,

But I think I'm doing all right.

Okay,

Good.

On that note,

We'll get right into the podcast.

Today,

We are going to talk about the commitment needed to change.

I'm not sure how this is going to unfold,

Because I know what I want to discuss.

I just don't know how the words are going to come together to get the points across.

So there.

All right,

That sounds interesting.

So I'll do what I usually do,

And that's just kind of do my best.

Yeah,

Well,

First,

I kind of try to open up,

So just stuff will flow through me.

And then I just stop babbling.

Usually something pretty good comes out.

Let's hope it works.

So yeah,

Today,

We're going to talk about like when people are trying to change their lives,

Which is generally what I'm talking about on most days.

A lot of times they'll come to me and they'll start making changes in their life,

And we'll start discussing things,

And they start seeing things in different ways,

And they start making little adjustments,

And it feels good,

So they continue doing it.

And basically,

The whatever you want to call it,

God,

The divine,

The universe,

It wants nothing but the best for you.

It wants you to be happy.

So it's conspiring for you to do well and to find peace,

Happiness,

And joy.

So what happens is we get positive feedback when we make positive adjustments,

And that's that feels good.

It feels like we're doing something,

And it moves us forward,

And everything's wonderful.

But at some point,

There comes a time where we really have to commit to the shift or else we stay stuck.

And that's where I've been noticing people getting stuck lately.

They seem to be hitting that point,

And it's that inner commitment.

What happens is when things start getting more advanced or more difficult,

And we actually have to,

We're at the threshold where we have to either really make the big shift and transcend where we are and really start living as a different person.

Really let go of who we thought we were,

Let go of who we thought our problems were,

And really transcend them and start living a different existence.

There comes a point where you really got to just be who you're working so hard to become.

Just really let go of your past identity and embrace the new one.

And what I've been seeing a lot is people are hanging on to their old way of thinking.

I guess I'll come up with some hypothetical example.

If I tell somebody that something minor is bothering them,

And I say,

Well,

If you look at it from this perspective,

It won't bother you so much.

And they go,

Oh,

I like that,

That's good.

So they start looking at it from that perspective,

And it brings them a little bit of peace and a little bit of happiness.

And then that's kind of easy.

But at some point you get to a place where you've learned a lot.

You've got all the tools,

And now you kind of have to make a leap and jump into being who you really want to be,

Really walking through this life with happiness,

Peace,

Joy.

You really have to go for it and let go of who you think you are.

And what I'm seeing is people are hanging on to their old belief systems.

They'll use their old thinking to come up with reasons why they can't do it.

So it feels like they're taking a step backwards.

They're not,

But it feels that way.

So they start depending on their old way of thinking.

And this is an important part of the process.

We have to understand that if we want a different life,

We have to live a different existence.

We have to think differently.

We have to be different.

It's easy to go,

I'm going to be peaceful and happy even if somebody cuts me off in traffic.

And then to do a little bit of work and then get there and then be peaceful and happy even though somebody cut you off.

That takes some work,

But you can do it.

Now to be peaceful and happy even when you lose your job or even when your car gets totaled,

That's a bigger thing.

You can't just fake that.

That's when you really have to encompass who you are.

So this episode is just directly,

I'm just listening.

I'm here.

This is obviously a veiled attempt at a life coaching session.

Actually,

You know why I said that?

Because this morning I was leaving the house and my neighbor totaled his car.

That's why it was on the front of my brain.

I completely forgot about your car accident.

As soon as I said it,

I was like,

Oh my God,

I saw you move.

And I was like,

Hey,

Wait a minute,

Ben's car got totaled.

It didn't get totaled.

If it was any other car that I've ever had in my entire life,

It would have been totaled.

But it got smashed up pretty good.

I was fortunate enough to have a nice enough car that $7,

000 worth of damage isn't considering being totaled.

Well,

Yeah,

So you're in that situation.

I'm in that situation and it was very difficult to not be very upset.

We don't have to do it perfectly.

That's not what I'm trying to say.

Beating ourselves up is never the answer in any way,

Shape or form.

It's just,

I think what the difference is,

Is even if we get upset in some of those situations,

We can't fall victim to it.

We can't allow it to be an excuse to go back to our old way of being.

We don't have to go through flying through every life situation perfectly.

We don't want to get overcome by it and let it pull us back down to where we were two years ago.

That's the type of thing that I'm talking about.

It always cracks me up when I'll have somebody come to me for advice in certain situations.

They'll be like,

Yes,

I really need your help and can you help me with this?

Yeah,

Yeah,

Yeah.

Then also we hit that threshold and they go,

Well,

Glenn,

You don't really understand.

Oh,

Really?

I don't understand.

Yeah,

I understand perfectly.

We're just putting a wall up because you don't want to follow the guidance anymore because it just got real.

It just got serious.

It just got heavy.

It just got hard.

That's where people all of a sudden will fall back on their thinking.

I mean,

Who likes it when things are hard?

Nobody likes it.

People like it.

People like it.

People like it when things are easy.

People do like it.

They much approve.

That's what I wanted to talk about today is it's that point where I'm doing all this work.

I'm doing all this work to be.

.

.

For me,

It hit a point where I was doing a lot of work for a long period of time and then I was looking around and my life wasn't really getting better anymore.

I was taking in all kinds of knowledge,

But I was at a standstill with the way I felt inside.

With that,

It was very uncomfortable for me.

This is one of.

.

.

I was just talking about this past weekend.

Sometimes people look at the changes that I've made in my life,

The growth,

And they think that I'm this real strong guy or something,

That I have something that other people don't.

I think it's more the opposite.

I don't white knuckle well.

I'm not good when I'm unhappy.

I can't just walk through life unhappy.

It's so uncomfortable for me.

It drives me absolutely insane.

It's not that I have some sort of weird inner strength that allows me to do difficult things.

It's that I can't handle being unhappy.

I just don't.

.

.

It drives me absolutely.

.

.

It's so uncomfortable.

Just in the last couple days,

I've felt some of it inside of me and I'm like,

Oh,

What is that?

I'm not peaceful.

I'm not happy.

I feel discontented and irritable.

That just pisses me off.

I'm like,

I have not worked this hard,

Come this far,

Developed a life that I've dreamed of and is heading in the direction of even more of my dreams and now I'm going to sit here being unhappy?

Screw that.

I'll do whatever it takes to get myself out of it because it's so uncomfortable.

So there.

Let's have a moment of silence.

So what you're saying is other people,

This isn't just about me?

No,

It's not.

Okay.

That's reassuring.

It's funny because you know what?

Depending on who listens to this,

I was thinking about this on the way in because I was having this idea and I was like,

You know what?

People who listen to this,

There's going to be a lot of them that work with me that are going to go,

Oh,

I bet she's talking about me.

Oh,

I bet she's talking about me.

He's talking about me.

Because everybody can identify with being at this point one way or another.

And I honestly didn't think about you guys at all when I was thinking about this subject,

But that was the first thing that came out of your mouth when I said it.

And then again when I brought up the car accident,

I wasn't even thinking about you.

But it's,

So I think that there's going to be a lot of people out there going,

Oh,

I think Glenn was thinking about me.

And you know what?

Most of them are probably going to be wrong.

Yeah.

That was a big thing.

I let the car accident affect me way too much.

And that was a.

.

.

Yeah,

But for how long?

Like four or five days.

So four or five days.

Now before that would have been your reality forever.

Maybe.

Well,

Until the initial shock eventually wore off.

And then if somebody brought it up again,

You probably would have been viewing it the same way as the initial time.

So theoretically it could have gone on forever.

And now you've got it down to four or five days.

That's huge progress.

And that's important.

I don't want to get so serious.

I don't want to get so focused on pointing out and trying to describe the issue and not throw in the power of hope and that beating ourselves up is of no avail.

That's part of the problem is oftentimes that is what will help transcend somebody through this little area of being stuck is when they stop beating themselves up.

Okay.

What we're talking about here is in general is a commitment,

Is recommitting when you're on a good path or,

Okay,

You've gone this far.

Now it's time to jump in.

You know?

Yeah.

It reminds me of when I was a kid,

There were little swimming holes,

Like little rivers that have bridges over them.

And kids would jump off the bridge from the road into the pond,

Into the river.

And all my friends would do it.

And I'd stand there and they'd go,

All right,

Ben,

It's your turn.

No.

Yeah.

No.

I'll walk over there to the bank and put my foot in and then climb down and get in the river and swim with you guys maybe.

But I'm not jumping off that bridge.

And I know it's okay.

I just saw 15 other kids do it.

Right.

But I can't do it.

I can't jump in.

I can't like.

.

.

Yeah.

And that's the fear holding you back.

You know,

If it's something you want to do.

I mean,

You know,

There's always that aspect of,

You know,

Don't do something because other people are doing it,

Obviously.

But that's not what we're talking about.

We're talking about facing that fear.

And it's the exact same thing because there's that fear inside that puts up the roadblocks,

You know,

And it goes,

Well,

Yeah,

This spiritual stuff works for all the little things,

But it can't work for this big thing.

You know,

That's too big of a leap.

And the fear comes up.

And you would be amazed at how many people can just stay at that spot.

And they navigate,

You know,

Michael Bernard Beckwith says,

As navigating your way around staying stuck.

You know,

I've said that before.

I love that line because it happens so much.

People navigate their way around staying stuck.

They come up with excuses.

They go,

You know,

Oh,

Well,

I'll,

You know,

I'll listen to Glenn's way of thinking on all these things and and they'll get all jazzed up and move forward and their life improves and all this stuff.

And then all of a sudden they hit a wall like this.

And that fear will snap their mind shut and go,

Well,

He just he doesn't know this and he doesn't he hasn't lived my life.

You know,

Then all of a sudden the excuses start coming.

And when the real work,

When the rubber meets the road,

They backpedal,

You know,

And and it's the thing that the thing that's tough when it happens is I know what that is.

I've been there,

You know,

And it's it's the I know it's not natural to go running through and kicking down a door that's on fire.

But if you do it,

What's on the other side is so much worth it.

It's you actually become who you're working towards and there's a level of peace.

But what happens is people get stuck there for years oscillating back and forth,

You know,

Just kind of coming up to the edge and and well,

I don't know.

And then they'll make an excuse.

And then a year later,

They'll come back and they'll come up and they'll start doing some work.

Oh,

I'm ready this time because my life is really hit bottom this time.

And then they go they then it gets real again,

They fall back a little and it's like,

Man,

Just you know,

Just really keep your eyes on the prize.

Know what you want to become.

Know that peace,

Joy and happiness and fulfillment are the things that really matter to you and push through that fear,

You know,

Push through that fear.

Somebody other than your past experiences to to try to learn a new way of being.

That makes sense.

Kinda convinced me,

Motivate me to leave here today and drive to that waterhole and jump off that bridge.

I think it's metaphorically,

I'm not really jumping off the bridge.

Oh,

No,

I wouldn't push you to not that one.

Oh,

I've gotten pushed off.

Yeah,

It was horrible.

Well,

You know,

It's such an internal shift that I don't know how much rah rah talk is going to help.

You know,

It's just a matter.

I think it's more and I'm all for the rah rah stuff.

Can I just say that's exactly what I was hoping you would say?

Oh,

Yeah.

I was like,

Yeah,

Because if you were going to give a motivational speech,

You just did a second ago.

Yeah,

You just explained all the good parts about it.

Yeah,

It's just it has nothing to do with you.

No,

It's internal.

I decided to jump off that bridge.

Right.

And that and that's what that's what it requires.

It requires slowing down,

Stepping back from the fear that's that's controlling your mind and really looking deep down inside and going,

OK,

Do you know,

How do I really feel inside?

How am I walking through this life?

Am I being ruled by fear in my life?

And if I am,

Do I want that for the rest of my years here or do I want to be ruled by love and do I want that that peace and contentment and fulfillment to flow through me for the rest of my years here?

And if I really do,

Then I then I need to dig down deep and walk into the unknown because that's what it feels like.

It feels like the unknown.

It feels really scary when you're when you're about to let go because a part of your ego identity dies off when you do that.

It's just when you finally say,

No,

That's not me anymore.

I'm going to walk through love and I don't give a damn what the consequences are.

I'm making a leap because I don't want to live like this anymore.

And when you make that leap,

It's just it's so powerful.

You know,

That's that's the stuff all good stuff comes through intention.

It comes it's all the work is inside work.

So when we really make that commitment to ourselves and then start taking the action on the outside,

It's it's awesome.

But yeah,

It's a very introspective,

Deep,

Honest,

Open minded and willing moment that you need to have with yourself.

And when you really can dig deep down inside and say,

Yes,

I'm going to do this,

I'm not going to be as myself anymore.

I'm going to do this.

That's the moment.

That's the moment when real change takes place.

And then I'll be on the other side with the rah rah.

Every show,

90 over 90 percent of the shows that we've done and we've done 40 now.

Come down to.

Fear versus love.

Yeah,

That's all there is.

This fear and love.

That's it.

And one of the two is ruling us.

You know,

And it's it's the you know,

A lot of it in our society is is fear of others loving us,

Fear of us fitting in fear of us not living up to other people's expectations.

That's why we do a lot of things.

And when we start making those decisions from self love and going,

You know what,

This is best for me.

This is going to bring love,

Peace and joy into my life.

And those who really love me will be happy that I did it.

And those who don't will fall away and I don't need them anyway.

It's you know,

When we start and it's not selfish,

It's you know,

That's one of the reasons why I think people need so much guidance in this,

Because sometimes people are so miserable that they'll just they're willing to try anything.

And that's a wonderful place to be.

But without guidance,

They start,

You know,

Some people can become really selfish and self destructive.

And they do it in the name of self love,

Because they just don't know better.

They don't it's so foreign to them.

They're not really sure about what they're doing.

And they'll be like,

Well,

I'm you know,

I'm quitting my job because it's because I'm not finding love in it every day.

So screw everyone,

You know,

Now it's like,

Whoa,

Whoa,

Whoa,

Wait,

Wait.

There's that's not self loving.

If you if you can't pay your bills,

Putting yourself in a situation like that is not self love.

You know,

There's a way to do things where it's a win win situation for you.

You know,

Not not where you're putting yourself or others in turmoil.

Sometimes you have to let other people stand on their own two feet.

But there's a loving way to do that quite often as well.

So it's you know,

I think a little bit of the guidance is really helpful.

Generally we'll stop making moves out of frustration,

Instead of out of self love,

You know,

And that's that's what we need to be really careful of.

I think I found the perfect quote for today.

I hope so.

Commitment is what transforms a promise into reality.

Abraham Lincoln.

Yeah.

And you know that it's true because he was honest.

Yeah.

Honest Dave.

Absolutely.

Commitment is what turns a promise into reality.

So what I said?

Yeah.

Yeah.

And that's that that's that's it.

It's you know,

Having sometimes having no plan B is really beneficial.

You know,

Just I'm doing this.

Well,

What if you know,

That's fear talking.

Well,

What if what if it doesn't work?

What if what if what if?

And that's why like when you're standing at that edge,

It's been it's been really helpful for me to especially like in the beginning when my spiritual awakenings really started.

My life was such a mess that it was that much easier to say,

I don't care if I no longer exist.

I'm either going to live happy,

Or I'm not going to exist anymore.

And honestly,

Either one is fine with me.

It was easier for me to say that back then.

Now I like my life.

So I have to put a kind of a different slant on it.

But I also have the knowledge of my past,

Which is helpful.

So I can I have to look at it.

And sometimes it's a difficult situation and I can't see how like I'll look at a situation and go,

Okay,

Well,

I have to be I have to choose self love here.

I have to.

And I look at it and I go,

Yeah,

But if I do,

I can't see any way that this is going to turn out good for that this person is going to be her or this person is going to be her or this is going to blow up.

It's going to turn out bad if I choose self love.

One way or another,

It's going to explode in my face.

And that's all I can see.

And I have to choose self love anyway.

Because to me,

It's I have to walk in a direction that I'm talking,

I have to I have to do that.

And so what happens is I'll choose self love,

Even though I think it's going to explode in my face.

And then all of a sudden,

Some miracle occurs and it doesn't explode.

And I'm like,

Oh my god,

Isn't that awesome.

And then the next time I come up to that wall again,

You'd think that I wouldn't have any fear because I've experienced it enough.

But I still do.

There's oftentimes when I still have those little morsels of fear going Glenn,

Look,

It's going to blow up.

And I go Yeah,

But all these other times I thought I was going to blow up and it didn't.

Yeah,

But this time it will.

It's going to you know,

It's going to.

Um,

I have a I can't call him a friend,

I don't really know him.

But you have a person I know someone I know someone.

I know someone he's a friend of a friend who is doing things that I consider successful and cool and a big deal.

And he's,

You know,

Following his passion and he's he has videos of him interviewing celebrities and he wants to be a filmmaker and he's pitching shows to some networks and stuff which is really cool.

Yeah,

Right.

And he's young.

And Dan,

I were talking about this the other day.

And it was like he's got blinders on.

Yeah.

And it's like,

How does he do that?

And I said,

Well,

He doesn't know that he can't.

Right.

So no plan B.

He doesn't.

He never occurred to him that he couldn't do it.

Right.

So and I bet you it has occurred to him.

He just hasn't let it take root.

And that's like,

But that is see,

There's you can get to where he is no matter where you are now.

Like,

Let's say the kid is,

You know,

Let's say you've got a 10 year old kid doing this and you and we can go look,

He doesn't know any better.

And that's why,

You know,

Sometimes depending on you might be able to say the same thing about an 18 year old kid or a 25 year old kid or whatever,

You know,

Oh,

They haven't experienced that much life yet.

They don't know any better.

Well,

That's just if we use that as an excuse.

It's just that it's an excuse.

I started changing my life when I was 35.

So you know,

And I've seen people,

I've worked with people in their seventies and I've seen their lives change.

So it's,

It's never too late to change.

That's just,

Yes,

Maybe he is there because he doesn't know any better.

He doesn't know he could fail.

Maybe that is the reason.

But where he is is no different than where any of us could be at any age if we decided to adopt his thought pattern.

You know,

It's,

That's all it is.

It's a thought pattern.

It's not,

It doesn't matter why he has it.

It matters that he has it,

You know.

So if,

As long as you stay onto that,

You can't lose.

You can't.

Even if he never got what he thinks he wants by following his passion,

He's going to be living in joy and I guarantee you he's going to experience wonderful things.

And he could be like,

What does he want to be,

A filmmaker?

Yeah.

Okay,

Let's say he's doing what he's doing and then all of a sudden he finds out at some point he doesn't want to be a filmmaker.

He wants to write things for,

He wants to,

You know,

Do anything.

Whatever he wants to do,

This is going to lead him there.

It's,

You know,

He's just,

With that mindset,

He's going to enjoy the journey that he's on and he's going to open up to his true self and whoever he wants to be.

And it's going to be beautiful.

Whether that's a,

That turns out to be a filmmaker,

Then he'll be one.

If it's not a filmmaker,

He falls into a different area by following his passion and he'll fall into a different area.

But what I do know is that as long as he has that mindset,

It's going to be awesome.

So commitment is what turns a promise into a reality.

Yeah.

So make that commitment to yourself.

And if people want to make that commitment to themselves and they want your help to do it,

Where can they contact you?

They can contact me at life-enhancement-services.

Com or find me on Facebook and oh,

My business voicemail is 401-380-6707.

Thanks for listening all.

Make that commitment and live a different life.

Take care.

This podcast is presented by New Shore Productions,

Executive producers,

Glenn Ambrose,

Benjamin Barber and David DeAngelis.

Reviews

Exactly what I needed to hear today, this morning. Thank you!

Love this! I’m so glad I found your podcasts, you guys really speak to where I am right now. I’m still in the small step, little victories stage, but I’m on my way to the big leap into change!! Thank you so much!!

This is my second time listening to this podcast. It is my very favorite of Glenn’s! Profound words and very motivational.

This is a blessing. My car was totaled a month ago... how funny. Thank you!

Made me giggle and smile.

Great talk . You get straight to the heart of the matter. Something I needed to hear at this point in my life. 🙏🏻

Always a pearl of wisdom in each episode. Thankyou boys 😁

Just what I needed to hear!

Great honest guidance ❤️💫

I enjoyed this talk because it shared the importance of commitment to our promises we make to ourselves and how we are coming from places of love or fear. Both perspectives dramatically change how we force ourselves to work through challenges.