Are You Sure You're "Right"?

In this episode I examine being right. What does that mean? Is it important? How do I know? Am I looking at things without bias? Is there another way? How does it benefit me? Are there drawbacks? All this and more!

Transcript

Welcome to Life,

Lessons & Laughter with your host,

Glenn Ambrose.

Hello,

Hello,

Welcome to the show,

Everybody.

Are you sure you're here?

That might be a better question than I intended.

Take a breath.

Settle in.

Let go of whatever has transpired in your day and just be here.

Nothing for you to do.

I have to do all the talking,

So you can just relax.

So yeah,

I titled this,

Are You Sure You're Right?

Because it seems like this is where we get caught a lot of times individually and then therefore collectively,

You know,

Really being right and sure we're right and standing up for what we think is right.

You know,

All this stuff.

And it's important to remember,

We're creating a new reality that the old reality doesn't,

It just doesn't work.

It's,

You know,

Like my mind tends to think of things deeper.

And actually,

I just watched a interesting show about highly sensitive people.

It was a documentary I found online.

And it was interesting.

I didn't agree with 100% of it,

But a lot of it,

I was like,

Wow,

You know,

This is very interesting.

And one of the aspects of being a highly sensitive person is that they say,

We process things deeper.

And boy,

I could relate to that.

You know,

And I went back to my childhood and could see some signs.

So yeah,

There's a good chance I'm a highly sensitive person.

I'm not big on labels.

So whatever.

But they say 20% of men and women,

20% each are highly sensitive,

And they can quantify it now and stuff.

So it's interesting because there's little differences.

And like I said,

One is processing things deeper.

So I tend to do that,

Process things deeper.

This is,

You know,

This is where I find a lot of my truth,

Quite frankly.

And I know I mentioned it quite a bit,

Is I just ask a follow up question,

Just go a little deeper,

You know,

To see what's underneath.

And that's where the truth is.

Or what we call the truth on the surface is just varied opinions and stuff like that,

You know.

So yeah,

Processing things deeper is just kind of how my mind.

My mind has a tendency to do that anyway.

So it's one of the biggest places of comfort I found in the last 10 years or more,

Maybe 20,

Is being okay not knowing,

Like not really.

I still have my opinions,

But I don't think I know everything.

I don't think I know for sure really anything,

You know.

And it always reminds me of when I saw Deepak Chopra on Supersoul Sunday many years ago.

And Oprah would always ask these questions at the end.

And one of them often was,

What do you know for sure?

Because she likes saying that,

You know,

Oh,

This is what I know for sure.

And Deepak Chopra said,

Nothing,

I don't know anything for sure.

It was things that seemed to be true 10 years ago,

I have a different opinion on now.

And it's constantly evolving and changing,

As am I,

And so I don't know anything for sure.

And I thought that that was a good answer,

Because it's actually very,

It can be difficult to get to that place where you're comfortable not knowing.

But boy,

If you can,

It's so pleasant there.

It's pleasant.

It's probably the number one thing that I've done dealing with the political climate in the last 10 years,

Is just understanding I don't know.

Because then what I mean,

If I don't know for sure,

Then my mind is more open to possibilities.

You know,

And I see that this is a big problem right now is people have picked sides.

And it doesn't matter what is said.

And of course,

The news and the social media feeds this dramatically.

But it doesn't matter what happens.

It's like,

If one side says,

This corruption,

And in a particular area,

And we're going to shine a light on it.

Well,

Then the side that has picked that side to be right says,

Yes,

This is awesome.

They're getting rid of corruption.

And they don't know if there's actually anything corrupt there,

Or if they're doing the right thing.

Because quite honestly,

We don't have the information necessary to make the judgments.

We don't know what's going on behind the scenes.

All we're at best,

All we're doing is taking educated guesses at best.

And most of the time,

They're not very educated.

I mean,

Even if you research this,

You know,

There is billions and trillions of dollars involved with people that have been in the governmental scenes and the power scenes and all this stuff for,

You know,

100 years.

And the way they get ahead is complicating things so much and hiding things that they can get away with everything that they've got away with.

So they're pretty good at it.

So thinking that we know all the information to make a judgment is just unrealistic.

We simply don't because most of it is hidden.

So one side says,

Oh,

This is a wonderful thing.

And we must support them because this is right.

You know,

And then the other side just has decided they don't like whatever side is doing that.

You know,

This can go both ways.

It doesn't matter.

Both sides have done it,

You know,

In the United States,

Democratic and Republic.

You know,

No matter what side you're on,

Both sides have done this.

So I'm not talking about a particular topic or a particular political party.

I'm just talking in general.

You know,

One side thinks that it's absolutely wonderful when they don't actually know if it's wonderful or not.

The other side knows that it's 100% horrible and they don't know either.

You know,

It's just we're making these judgments and we're standing on them like they're a hill to die on and we don't even have the information necessary.

We don't know 90% of the information behind the scenes,

You know.

So that's not to say we can't have opinions.

I mean,

I have all kinds of opinions,

But my point is latching onto them and saying that I'm right.

Is not the way to go.

It's,

You know,

And this is I feel like I.

I feel I have a slightly more realistic picture than most with the political scene.

And the reason I say that is because I'm not attached to either side.

So therefore,

I'm not when I hear one side say something,

I'm not like,

Yes,

Absolutely.

And then when I hear the other side say something,

I'm not like,

Definitely not.

And that's really where it is.

Once people have picked a side and you think you're right,

You have to defend that,

Right?

You have to be right.

And it's like I see things that are obviously good.

Well,

I can't say that.

It's not obvious,

Right?

Um,

That are really seemingly good.

And people on the other side just slamming it and attacking it.

And and these people that are attacking it are are wonderful,

Kindhearted,

Loving people.

So why would they be attacking that?

Well,

It's just because they don't like who's not in office right now.

That's that's why.

And it was the same way.

Previous,

The other side would attack.

You know,

It's it's just attacking sides is not it.

People don't even take the time to to understand what's happening anymore or what's what's being done or what's being said.

And it's been like this for quite a while.

Like I said,

I mean,

You know,

That's very important to me that that people understand.

I'm I'm not supporting either side.

I think the whole system is shot.

Um,

And we don't this this is why we're creating a new paradigm because there ain't no fix in this peeps.

You know,

That that's another reason why I don't get swayed and I'm not going to stay on this,

But I don't get swayed that much because I've seen this stuff play out over the last 100 years.

It's,

You know,

Well,

I haven't been alive for 100,

But so I've I've seen it over the last 50.

So it's just if having a particular party in an office was going to benefit the world,

Then the world would have benefited by now.

And it hasn't.

The only thing that is in common for the last 50 years is that things get worse.

That's the only thing that's consistent.

It doesn't matter who's in office.

Things continually get worse.

Our options for who to elect get worse.

The democratic system gets worse.

The ripping off of the American people gets worse.

The economy gets worse.

Everything gets worse in the last 50 years,

No matter who's and we've had people oscillating in office and it's it's consistently gotten worse.

So like and it's just a reflection of the system coming to its end.

That's why it's like,

Oh,

We're going to pass something.

Oh,

OK,

Whatever,

You know,

Pass it.

It might even do good for a couple of years and then somebody else will get into office and then they'll strip it away and then it'll get,

You know,

And then they'll go do something.

And then it's just nothing ever really gets accomplished.

It's just a game going back and forth.

So it doesn't really matter.

It doesn't matter who's right and who's wrong.

What matters is the system is shot.

It's and it always has been.

It's been built to fall apart.

So it's.

Is it really that important?

Who's right and who's wrong?

And,

You know,

I'm so sick of talking about politics.

To be honest with you.

So here's a real moment.

It breaks my heart.

You know,

My heart hurts right now.

And I'm sad,

I'm sad,

I'm sad for all the division and all the frustration that it causes humanity,

It's.

It's sad,

It's sad that we've gotten to this point.

You know,

It's but suffering is the way through.

It's it's that,

You know,

I just it feels like it feels like.

Know what it reminds me of?

It reminds me of me right before I hit bottom when I got sober and had my spiritual awakenings.

That's what it feels like the world is in right now.

There's just chaos everywhere.

And and even when people think that they know what is right and what is wrong.

They kind of know on some level that they don't and they're scared.

And they don't know what to do to fix it.

And it's overwhelming.

And we think about it too much.

But,

You know,

And one of the one of the things that I learned was,

You know,

My one of my favorite quotes is Einstein,

You can't fix a problem with the consciousness that created it.

And this is where we are,

We like we have to start thinking in a different way,

We have to start interacting with reality in a different way,

Because this way doesn't work.

Like it is nothing good going on in the way we live our lives.

The the progress,

The.

Flying to the moon,

Building tall buildings.

Technology,

All of it,

It doesn't matter.

It's we've lost how to be happy and to be human and to be loving and kind to one another.

We've lost that.

It's gone.

I mean,

We can get it back,

But right now it's gone like there like.

We're just at each other's throats in every way,

Shape or form.

And it's because we think we're right and we have to defend it.

And you're not right.

We're not right.

Being right is the best way to feed the ego.

You know,

Eckhart Tolle says that.

It's the best way to feed the ego.

This is how I'm pulling back.

And,

You know,

There's a there's a big pull to it.

So I get it.

I don't do it perfectly,

But.

But we have to try,

We have to try something different,

Because what we're doing doesn't work and the way we're living doesn't work.

We do not prioritize happiness or peace or contentment or getting along with other people.

There that is nowhere on our priority list as a general rule.

It isn't there.

It's,

You know,

And we can and it's just not on our priority list.

You know,

We can sit around.

I know that.

90% of the world is amazingly wonderful,

Good hearted,

Loving people.

I know that.

But we're not practicing it.

We're not implementing it into our lives.

So it doesn't really matter.

It doesn't matter if you're a kind hearted,

Loving,

Warm person.

If you're not acting loving and kind and warm to others,

It doesn't matter.

Doesn't matter if you go sit in a closet and you're loving,

Kind and warm.

And then as soon as you get out or hop on social media or something,

You're just attacking and vicious and feeling like a victim and overwhelmed.

Like we have to do our inner work first.

And being right is one of the first steps.

We have to stop thinking we're right because we're not.

We don't know most of the information that we need.

Just for starters,

We don't know.

You know,

I look at what's going on on a global scale.

And like when I when I read a headline,

I can immediately know what side is telling the story.

Because just the headline and the way it's written is all slanted in one direction,

Either dramatically for or dramatically against the story.

So as soon as I read the headline,

I'm like,

OK,

So this is a article that's against what's going on.

So if I would like to look at this from a clear perspective,

I need to keep that in mind.

I need to keep in mind that they're saying things to try to get me to be against this.

So as I keep that in mind,

I can read it and I can be like,

OK,

Well,

They're going,

Isn't this horrible that they're doing that?

And I have to take out that isn't this horrible and go,

OK,

What are they doing?

Let me just read this one sentence.

They're doing this.

OK,

How do I feel about that?

Well,

It sounds like this is a good thing.

Oh,

OK,

So this might be a good thing.

They're against it just because the other side is doing it like that.

You know,

There's this little three words or a line here and there.

Like if you read a three paragraph explanation of something,

There's usually like anywhere from one to three times,

I would say,

Where they actually take a little tidbit of actual news,

Actual fact,

Actually what they're talking about and put it in there.

And that's all I pay attention to because I understand that they're trying to slam me against this.

So I'm just looking for those little parts that say what's actually happening.

And then I can make my own decision whether I think it's a good thing or a bad thing.

And the same thing is whether it's pro.

Oh,

They're saying that this is the most wonderful thing that's ever happened.

OK,

They want me to think that it's wonderful.

OK,

I have to I have to keep that in mind.

And I have to just look at what is actually being done.

OK,

And then that's how I can form my opinion.

But like I said,

Those opinions,

I don't actually think that I know what's going on or it's the truth because I don't have it.

You know,

Like like when I noticed this one many years ago,

There was there was a bill,

You know,

That that like a president vetoed or something like that.

And it was like,

Obviously,

For the benefit of the United States people.

But the president vetoed it.

And I'm like,

Why would they veto that?

Like even I mean,

Just for pop,

Even if the presidency is just a popularity contest.

And they want their numbers to go up,

Their numbers would obviously go up if they let this pass.

And then they sent out a news blitz telling everybody how wonderful they were.

So why would they possibly not do this?

I don't understand.

So I went in and I looked and I did some research and I found out that the bill,

The name of the bill,

The top of the bill,

You know,

It was it was about what I thought it was.

Right.

But the reason that the president had vetoed it is because it had like 20 other things underneath that that had nothing to do with the topic of the bill that were all jammed in there that the president was against at that particular time.

And I don't even remember what president it was or what the topic was.

But I just remembered going,

Oh,

OK.

So what the you know,

What they're doing to confuse us is that they're headlining a bill and saying it's for this.

But then they're jam packing,

You know,

Another billion dollars that they're giving to other countries for teeth whitening or something,

You know,

That the president was against.

Like,

Oh,

OK.

So now the the you know,

And it can go both ways at that,

You know,

In that example that I'm giving,

The president can be like,

You know,

Look,

I'm I'm blocking them from wasting all of your money.

I'm wonderful.

And then the other side can go,

Look,

He just vetoed something that's good for the people,

You know,

And that's that was one of the many times where I'm like,

Oh,

This isn't.

It just depends on the slant that they put on it.

It's just so convoluted and confusing that it's just so.

So if I'm if I'm part of the political party,

That is for and I just be like,

Oh,

President,

You know,

President vetoes this wonderful bill.

I'm like,

Oh,

My God,

What a jerk.

And I don't look into anything more.

Right.

I'm just like,

What a jerk.

I can't believe you did that.

And then if I'm against,

Then it's it's like or pro against whatever.

I'm just saying the two sides.

If I'm on the other side,

Then then it's like,

Oh,

Look,

The president saved us.

These people trying to sneak out billions of dollars,

You know,

And saved us.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So it's the same.

It's the same thing.

It just depends on what side I'm on.

So there is no right or wrong.

There's good and bad in both.

Like and that's my point,

Like.

You know,

There's good and bad in both.

So like.

You know,

Hopefully we can start understanding this.

It's it's just not one way or another,

You know,

Like.

Everybody that's on one side or another now has family members or friends that they know are good hearted.

They know are good people that they've known for many years and know they're a good person,

And yet they think they're on the other side.

And they've oversimplified like if,

You know,

One side is like,

Well,

If you voted for this side,

You hate America.

And then the other side is like,

Well,

If you voted for this side,

Then you're you're you just want evil to run the world.

And it's like it's neither.

It's not that they're just looking at different things in different ways.

That's all it's because half the world didn't magically go insane,

You know,

This this is I just use logic to figure this stuff out.

Like there's no way you know what's more likely that there's multiple ways of looking at things or that half the people that you've known your entire life suddenly went insane,

Like no matter what side you're picking,

Because that's we're divided pretty much 50 50 in the country of the United States at this point,

You know,

And so it's on what side they think is going to do right,

Which it's the answer is neither,

In my opinion,

But but like.

What's more likely that they're looking at things in different ways?

And they're trying to or hoping that one side is going to help them live a happier,

Healthy,

Healthier,

More meaningful and a life with less struggles.

Do you think that they might be looking at things just differently or that half the people,

You know,

Magically went insane all of a sudden?

Like and they hide it really well when you talk to them about other things,

But they're actually clinically insane and don't have any basis in reality.

It's just that they're looking at things differently,

That's all.

But we can't see that because we are focused on being right.

And that's egoic.

Egoic has no.

It can't.

It has to defend.

Once it picks,

It has to defend.

Because it's part of your identity.

Now,

Once you know you're right,

Once you decide you're right,

This is the way that I'm going to look at things.

I am right.

And it's egoic.

Which it always is.

So.

Then you have to defend that.

So the way you look at information is slanted in your direction.

Now,

You know,

If we are vigilant in keeping our minds open and actually researching things consistently,

That's what I try to do.

When I have a question about,

I mean,

I don't do it that much anymore.

Every once in a while I will,

But I think I understand the big picture and I'm not waiting for some external source to save the world.

I don't think it's going to.

I think we need to create a new paradigm.

So that's what my focus is going on.

But like.

It's not latching on to what we think is is right.

That's when it's egoic.

It's.

Just understanding,

Well,

I might be missing something,

I might not have all the information,

I don't know.

That is so scary to most people.

But how the heck do I explain this?

I'm trying to I'm trying to bypass the ego to to reach people,

You know,

And it's it's.

It's hard,

It's hard because it's like it's like explaining to a fish.

What water is like most people are so in it.

That as soon as you say like.

You're doing this.

They get defensive and they don't even entertain the possibility that they might be doing it.

That's what's difficult in reaching people,

You know,

Especially the masses.

I mean,

When I'm working with with clients,

Of course,

It's fine.

They come to me for this stuff.

So their mind is open as to what my opinion is and to how to look at other things in healthier ways.

So that's easy.

But like,

You know,

The masses,

I'm trying to phrase it in a way that kind of makes people think and go,

Oh,

Am I doing that?

Or and it's it's hard because everybody's because of this.

Everybody's so sure that they're right.

That like if I say anything about them not being right,

They start defending it egoically immediately.

You know,

Well,

It has to be a right and wrong.

Oh,

So.

So you're telling me that that,

You know,

Somebody just walks up and shoots somebody than is that that could be right.

It's not necessarily wrong.

It's like,

No,

It's not.

It's not what I'm saying.

That's just such an egoic question because the ego likes to generalize and blow it out of proportion to the most extreme thing that doesn't really have anything to do with the actual question and use that as proof that they don't do this in any way in their lives.

It's like,

Well,

That's equal to.

To everything that I think,

Because I'm so sure I'm right,

That everything is as black and white as somebody walking up and shooting somebody.

That that's everything in my brain is equal to that.

There is no other possibility.

There is no gray area.

There is no information that I'm missing in any area.

It's like,

Well,

Like,

OK,

So but then but then if you if you start adding in.

Details,

Even in that story,

People go,

Oh,

Well,

Well,

I didn't know that.

Well,

OK,

OK,

So so what if the person that got shot was Hitler?

What if somebody just walked up and shot Hitler?

Because he was,

You know,

Killing millions of people.

Oh,

Well,

That's OK.

Well,

He was an evil man.

I bet you didn't say that.

Oh,

Well.

I thought you said that it's wrong 100 percent all the time if somebody did that.

Well,

Not in that case.

You didn't tell me that case.

It's like,

Yeah,

Everything is like that.

Everything has extenuating circumstances.

Everything has different ways of looking at it.

Everything.

You know,

I mean,

We haven't.

You know,

One of the ways that I got this was when I was getting sober,

I was like,

You know,

Did I because it was,

You know,

Getting sober there,

The program that was talk about these spiritual awakenings and stuff.

And I'm like,

What the heck?

You know,

And then at the back of.

The book.

The big book,

It has an appendices and it explains a spiritual awakening is just a change of perception,

A change of perspectives.

So I was like.

OK,

So when I was 12,

Did I think the same way?

I think,

You know,

When I was in my 30s,

I was in my 30s at the time.

It's like,

No.

So there were certain things that I thought were true or thought that it was the way life unfolded at 12.

And then now my 30s,

I think differently.

Yes.

OK,

Well,

That's a change of perspective.

That's a change of perception because through my experiences.

Oh,

OK,

Well,

Then if that's all a spiritual awakening is,

Then I could see myself doing that.

I could see myself changing.

The way that I look at certain aspects of life,

Just because I'm exposed to different bits of information and I'm getting older and having different experiences.

And that's what opened me up.

Just that simple little thing was what opened me up to really,

I probably the rest,

Probably everything that happened,

Getting sober,

You know,

Having all these spiritual awakenings.

If I didn't have that little piece that it was possible,

Maybe if all the planets lined up and the sun shined on my butt just the right way,

That maybe possibly it could happen.

If I wasn't open like that,

Then it wouldn't have happened.

So that's where we have to start just going.

Maybe,

Maybe I don't know everything.

Maybe all these powers that be hide the information.

Maybe the coworker that irritated me at work was going through their own struggles that day and it had nothing to do with me.

Maybe the family member that was supposed to pay me back my $20 ran into an unexpected circumstance and they're too scared to tell me about it.

Maybe I can salvage this relationship by being loving and kind and forgiving.

Just loosen,

You know,

It's being.

So this is something to contemplate is being right,

Feeding your ego and,

You know,

You got to let go a little bit and open up your mind.

And when I dove into that,

I found like,

Yes,

Every time,

Every time being right is feeding my ego.

And the reason I say that is it's,

It's,

It's not because I'm never right.

So I think that that's what that's what our ego tells us.

That's why we have such a hard time letting go of it,

Because we're like,

Well,

You know,

I,

I have to be right about some stuff.

I'm not wrong all the time.

And I have the right to my opinions and all that stuff.

And all that's true.

You are going to be right.

Sometimes you do have the right to your opinion and nobody's trying to strip that of you.

I'm not trying to strip that of you.

That's not what I'm talking about.

You know,

Again,

The ego goes to the extreme and says,

That's what this means.

He wants to strip your ability to have an opinion.

You can't allow that to happen,

Right?

I'm not doing that.

You have the right to your opinion.

All I'm saying is if you're not sure you're right,

Most often your opinions be more on point.

Why?

Because they're not egoic based and you're not trying to defend them.

That's why you're,

You're,

You're not locked into a position where that you have to defend because it's part of your identity.

See,

As soon as you truly believe you're right,

Then you would,

It's no longer about that topic anymore.

If you pick something,

You know,

Let's just say there's a,

There's a political argument and you pick a side and you say,

I know I'm right on this.

This is,

I am,

This is my hill to die on.

I am right on this.

As soon as you do that,

It shuts your mind off to the other possibilities.

You know,

This is why the Dalai Lama talked about,

I was reading one of his books and he was talking about people thinking that he,

He waffles from side to side.

That he,

He doesn't take a stance really strong,

Which isn't true.

And he said,

He said,

The reason that people think that is because when one side,

You know,

He's a world leader and he has to hear basically arguments from two sides,

Right?

So when one side is,

Is sharing their side of the argument,

He said,

He's listening to try to understand their thinking,

To understand where they're coming from.

So when they're speaking,

He's going,

Okay,

Yes,

I understand.

Okay.

I understand.

Yes.

I see your point.

And most people think that he's picking that side and he's not,

He's just taking in the information,

Trying to understand the perspective that the person is coming from.

And then the other side speaks and he goes,

Yes,

I understand.

Okay.

Good point.

And they go,

Oh,

He's waffling back and forth.

Now he agrees with this person.

No,

He's not agreeing with either one.

He's just trying to understand their perspective and why they think the way that they think.

That way he can deeply understand them.

Then he can come to his own conclusion.

And this is what we need to do.

If we are locked onto one way of thinking,

It doesn't look like what I just described.

It looks like when one side is explaining,

The side that you're on is giving reasons for their position.

You're going,

Yes,

Definitely.

A hundred percent.

See,

See,

This is what I'm talking about.

This is the best.

This is the way.

This is right.

Yeah.

Oh yeah.

Oh,

That's a good point.

See,

That's the right way.

That's the right way.

And you're just reinforcing it.

That's all ego.

You're not listening to understand.

You're not even trying to find out if that pay attention to see if that person is saying something you don't agree with.

You're looking to agree with them.

You're planning to agree with them.

You're trying to agree with them.

That slants what you're hearing dramatically.

Sometimes people will do that and I'll be like,

Well,

You agree with this.

So you're telling me you agree with this.

And they'll be like,

No,

Of course I don't agree with that.

And I'm like,

Well,

That's what they just said.

They're like,

No,

They didn't.

Yeah,

They did.

We can play it back.

And that's what they said.

They go,

Oh,

Well,

They didn't mean that they meant this.

It's like,

Well,

Why didn't they say that?

Then that's completely different.

They said this and you said you agreed with it.

Well,

No,

No.

Like you can't even.

It's not reality there.

That's just whatever you want.

And then when somebody is saying stuff that from the side that you're against,

It doesn't matter what they say.

There could be some good points to it.

There could be some good aspects or they could be completely wrong.

But you listening to understand.

Would get you to understand.

You might not still might not agree.

You can be like,

Hmm,

OK.

Now I understand why they think that way.

I don't agree with it.

But there is a line of logic that makes sense coming from that perspective.

Again,

I think the other side is more.

True,

But.

I do understand why they're saying what they're saying.

That's a wonderful world to live in.

That's the world we need to try to live in.

Like a lot of people now are so upset with the other side,

Either side,

Right?

And they go,

I don't understand.

I don't understand how somebody could possibly think that way.

And my response is always,

Well,

Have you tried to understand why they would think that way?

And they go,

Yes.

Why?

Because if they didn't like.

Of course,

They're going to say yes,

Because that's the right answer.

You can't say no.

No,

I like this is all happening on an unconscious level.

But people know that they're not supposed to be close minded,

Right?

They are,

But they know they're not supposed to be.

So as soon as you say,

Are you close minded?

They're going to go,

No.

They're not going to think,

Have I been taking in information in a close minded way?

Have I been acting close minded?

There's no,

They answer the question before you finish asking it.

Are you close minded?

Are you taking in information in a close minded way?

No,

Of course not.

Well,

I didn't even finish the question and it sounds kind of reactive,

Kind of defensive.

Did you think about the question that I just asked?

Did you go back?

Because you didn't really have time to go back and think about how you're taking in information and going,

Wow,

Have I been close minded?

You didn't even have time to think about it.

But you know the answer.

That's one of the ways you know that people aren't thinking about something is if they're answer comes before you even finish asking.

So if we would like,

If we would truly like to understand people and the other side,

It brings peace when we understand.

Because like,

This is why like,

I'm at peace with people on both sides of the political climate.

Why?

Because I understand why they think both sides.

I understand.

Why?

Because I was open minded and I didn't form an opinion first.

And I don't allow the way something is written to sway my opinion.

So I just look and I'll be like,

Oh,

OK,

I see why they why they think that this is a good idea.

Don't know that I necessarily agree with it,

But I see why they think it's a good idea.

Then I look at this side and I go,

Oh,

OK,

I see their point.

I don't know if I agree with it,

But I see their point.

And then now I understand.

So I don't think the world is going crazy for one,

Right?

I don't think half the people on the planet magically went insane.

So that makes me feel better.

I'm like,

Oh,

OK,

People are still good people and everything.

And then I don't think that one way is pure evil and the other way is pure good.

I think in the political climate,

They're both messed up.

But but like but I also don't hand my fate.

Since I don't think that one is evil and one is good,

Then I'm not handing my fate over to them because I'm like,

It doesn't matter.

They're both bad.

So like I've I've seen both parties do horrible things for the last 50 years I've been alive.

So I'm not banking on them to fix the world or its problems because they never have.

They they've told me since I was a little kid that they were going to make America wonderful and and the United States great.

And nobody has ever done it.

It's gotten consistently worse.

Our quality of life is consistently worse.

It's so it's no,

I don't I don't believe that anybody's going to save me,

But I don't need anybody to save me as soon as I stopped putting.

As soon as I stopped taking my happiness and putting it into the government's hands.

I got peace.

I got a lot more peace because I don't trust those people because they all lie and make up stuff and everything and just line their own pockets.

And it's all based in greed and all that stuff.

So just this general rule,

All of them.

So if I just go and some worse than others,

But all of them.

So if I just go,

OK,

I'm not going to depend on those types of people or those types of structures.

It's probably a better word because the whole structure is based in that.

Like you could have a good person that's in alignment with doing some horrible things.

And they're a good person.

It's just the whole system's corrupt.

So once I don't trust the corrupt system and I know,

OK,

I have to save myself,

Like because they ain't going to save me.

Oh.

Now I start doing what it takes to create the life that I want.

And I feel better about that because I'm not scared because I'm not putting my fate in their hands.

Well,

OK,

Cool.

Well,

What about this?

What about this?

You know,

To me,

It's like,

You know,

All that,

Like list 10 topics that you think would make the world a wonderful place and pretend for a moment that somebody came in and fixed all of them,

All 10.

Right.

Here's the newsflash.

There's about nine million more things that need to be fixed.

And living the way that we're living,

Thinking that that that.

Whatever type of system we have is going to create a good life.

For the people on planet Earth,

There's no evidence to support that.

Our systems,

Whether you like it or not,

Are based on greed.

Money and power,

They're just based on that.

You cannot have a society free of war,

Peaceful,

Kind,

Equal rights.

You can't have that in a system that's created on greed and power.

You can't.

So the system has to be different.

So try getting used to being in the unknown.

So I want to read this quote from Pema Chodron.

It's from her book.

Anxiety,

Heartbreak and tenderness mark the in-between state.

Does that sound like where we are as a people?

Anxiety,

Heartbreak and tenderness mark the in-between state.

It's the kind of place we usually want to avoid.

The challenge is to stay in the middle rather than buy into struggle and complaint.

The challenge is to let it soften us rather than to make us more rigid and afraid.

Becoming intimate with the queasy feeling of being in the middle of nowhere only makes our hearts more tender.

When we are brave enough to stay in the middle,

Compassion arises spontaneously.

By not knowing,

Not hoping to know,

And not acting like we know what's happening,

We begin to access our inner strength.

This is what I'm talking about,

People.

Just not latching on to things,

Being comfortable not knowing.

It's okay.

See,

We want to know because it makes us feel safe.

Oh,

I know what's going on.

Oh,

I can relax and stop thinking about it.

No,

You can find a way to stop thinking about it without thinking that you know.

You can just be like,

It could be this way,

It could be that way.

I don't know.

Most of these things we think we know,

We're not doing anything about it anyway.

Like sharing on social media,

Your opinion is not changing the world.

I'm not sure if you know that.

But complaining with your friends and family members is not changing the world.

It's just complaining is complaining.

And that's another ego stroke.

You know,

Complaining is basically saying if it were up to you,

Then you wouldn't do it that way.

Right?

That's like,

Again,

We got to learn to go underneath what we're saying and understand what it means energetically.

What it's saying and doing on an unconscious level.

Because up here,

You can say,

No,

It's not what it means.

But then down here,

Yes,

That is what it means.

So complaining is stroking your ego.

It's every time we complain about anything.

You know,

Tole uses the example of ordering soup that's supposed to be hot and it comes cold.

So if you go,

I can't believe they brought this soup cold,

It's supposed to be hot.

What kind of moron would do that?

Is the chef a moron?

Did the waiter let it sit there for too long?

I can't believe this place sucks.

That's complaining.

That serves no purpose except feeding your ego.

None.

None.

Except feeding your ego.

So on the other hand,

Addressing the problem and going,

Excuse me,

This is cold for my taste.

I believe it's supposed to be hot.

Could you please heat it up for me?

Thank you.

That addresses the problem and gets it corrected.

Without the judgment piece,

Right?

This is what complaining does.

Complaining strokes our ego because it implies if it were up to us,

We would have done it differently.

So therefore,

We are better.

We are better than the person.

We are better than the situation.

We are better.

And it just strokes our ego.

That's why people are addicted to it.

This is why we do it all the time.

Because it's one of the only ways that we can feel safe.

So we have to stop doing that.

See,

I can still have an opinion.

I can be like,

Well,

I like,

I think this soup is supposed to be hot.

And I like to eat it hot.

That's my opinion.

That's my preference.

And I still get the situation corrected.

But most things in life,

We're not,

We complain about them and scream and and act like it's the end of the world.

And we don't do anything about it.

We just complain.

And then we act like our opinion is important.

Like why?

It doesn't do anything.

Your opinion doesn't change anything.

You voicing your opinion doesn't change anything.

So it's like,

Which kind of leads me into and I'll have to wrap up with this.

It's one of,

Well,

Should I?

Yeah,

Yeah.

I'll wrap up with this.

So,

You know,

Abraham Hicks talks about truth and reality in a cool way,

In my opinion.

So this quote says,

And there's another quote that's a little longer that I like a lot,

But I'm going to use this one for now.

Never,

Ever,

Ever,

Ever face reality unless it's pleasing to you.

Because whatever you're facing,

You'll only get more of the same.

OK,

So what's meant by this is we we act like the truth is so important.

And coming to the conclusion of the truth is so important.

And if we're not facing what we call reality right now,

Then we're sticking our head in the sand and we're denying and.

Well,

That doesn't make sense if we perceive ourselves as creators,

OK?

So I believe we're creating our own reality as we go through life.

So like when I look at my life today,

If there's aspects of my life that I don't like,

Then that means that,

Well,

Whether I like it or whether I don't like like it,

Whatever is transpiring in my life at this particular moment is made up of a bunch of thoughts,

Feelings,

Decisions and actions that I made in the previous 55 years.

That's what got me here.

I am at the place that I am in my life because of the thoughts,

The feelings,

The decisions,

The actions that have transpired within me solely,

Not anything outside of me,

But me.

I have created the reality that I am in right now.

So.

It's like I use I'll use money as the example in this,

But it can be used with anything.

So if I don't have the amount of money that I want,

It's because of the thoughts,

The feelings,

The decisions and the actions that I had up until this point.

So.

So me sitting there going,

Well,

The fact is what's really important is,

Is that I don't have enough money.

I don't have the money that I want to do what I want.

That's that's reality.

And I have to face that.

No,

You don't.

You don't.

It's not that important.

It's why the windshield is 100 times bigger than the rearview mirror.

It's not as important where we've been as it is where we're going,

Where we're going is 100 times more important.

So it's not that important to go.

I don't have enough money right now.

That's not really that important.

What's important is that in this example,

You would like more money.

So if I would like more money,

Then I have to change my thoughts,

My feelings,

My decisions and my actions.

They have to be different from the past,

Because if they are not,

I am creating the same future that I have in the present moment.

I'm creating more of what I have,

Which in this example is lack of money.

So if I continue facing reality and saying this is just how it is,

This is the truth of my reality.

Why is that important?

What does that get me?

How does that benefit my life?

Because when I have this conversation with people,

They go,

It's very important to face reality.

OK,

Why?

Well,

Because you have to.

Yet why?

Well,

Because if you don't,

You're not facing reality.

There is no reason because there's no benefit to it.

Give me a benefit to facing reality.

Other than,

You know,

Like deciding that you're not going to look at reality like the only benefit of looking at reality is for a moment is going.

I like this or I don't like this and then let it go because it serves no other purpose.

If you like it,

Then do more of the same.

If you don't like it,

Then do different.

But other than that,

It serves no purpose.

But people just that's all they want to focus on.

Well,

This is the reality.

Reality is I don't have the money that I need to have.

Yeah.

And guess what's going to be your reality tomorrow and next week and the week after that,

It's going to be the same because you think the same because you're locked onto that as being your reality.

That's truth.

That's important.

No,

It's not important.

What's important is where you would like to go and what you need to do to get there.

That's that's what's important.

So do you see how it's this idea that we have to stand we have to figure out what's right and what's true and stand in it and it doesn't serve a purpose.

We have to get better.

You know,

And I think I think so.

I'll wrap up with this.

We have to stop looking at the world because we don't have control over what happens with the world and start looking at ourselves.

We must be the change we wish to see in the world.

We must do these things that I'm talking about and implement them into our particular world.

And then when I do it and somebody else doesn't,

Somebody else doesn't,

Somebody else does it.

Eventually,

We have a new vibrational society.

We have a new society with different principles and different way of interacting with life.

And that is when the collective will change,

Not before.

We're never going to change the collective before we change the present,

Before we change ourselves.

We have to do this.

We look at the collective like,

Oh my God,

It's so horrible.

They're doing it on these gigantic stages.

That's just because it's collective.

Do it inside you.

Don't worry about your neighbor.

Do it inside of you and your life will get better.

And then eventually,

This is catching on,

Peeps.

So it'll come.

All right.

I just looked at the time.

I got to fly.

All right.

Thanks for listening.

Peace.