Audiobook: The Inner Path - Chapter 11: Living Our Truths

"The Inner Path: A Guide to Living a More Mindful, Fulfilling, and Spiritual Life" by Geoff Bell-Devaney

Chapter 11: Living Our Truths

There is a path to greater happiness and fulfillment within each of us. As we begin exploring this inner path, we will begin to truly know ourselves. We will start growing in awareness, wisdom, and inner peace. This audiobook version of The Inner Path: A Guide to Living a More Mindful, Fulfilling, and Spiritual Life can help you successfully navigate this inner path. It can help you awaken to your inner truths and your true self - to the infinite depth of peace, presence, and power that is within you.

Transcript

Chapter 11,

Living Our Truths Many of us make our way through the day with a pretend smile on our face,

Projecting an image of politeness.

Or perhaps we put on a different face in public,

One of anger and tightness.

Perhaps we act in ways that are designed to make sure we never get hurt,

Such as hiding behind an expression of unfriendliness.

No matter how we choose to act in public,

However,

When we do so,

We're being untrue to ourselves and our real feelings.

As we begin following our instincts and learn to express our feelings,

No matter how uncomfortable that may be,

We can put down our public facade.

We can begin truly engaging in life and move beyond a false sense of politeness or anger.

When the only acting we do is on our feelings,

We can stop living in masks to anger and fear and start responding to each new situation from a place of integrity.

We can let go of the need to please others or push them away and begin feeling more comfortable within ourselves.

As we start behaving in ways that feel truthful to us,

We'll begin to trust that we will be able to deal with life as it's presented to us.

We will also learn to better accept people as they are and allow our inner truths to guide us in every moment.

As we continue looking within and exploring our reactions to others' behaviors,

We may discover that we are being overly sensitive to some issue because of a past experience of our own and that those people who are offending us are perhaps hurting in some way themselves.

By acknowledging our emotions and asserting how we feel,

We'll no longer have to act in ways that are untrue for us.

We'll begin to feel less alone and vulnerable to the emotional whims of others and may find that we no longer have to pretend to be kind to others,

For that will naturally become the most comfortable way to live.

As we move closer to our true selves by embracing our emotions and learning to express them,

We may one day be able to wander through a room full of unfriendly people and not take any of it personally.

We will better understand and have compassion for their suffering and see them as people who are unhappy and in pain.

We may also find that we won't even have to complain about their behavior once we realize that they're not able to darken our day unless we let them.

In this way,

As we become stronger within ourselves,

We can,

In effect,

Walk through an otherwise lonely rainstorm and never get wet.

Yet,

Perhaps there are still times when we do feel hurt by the words or actions of another.

What are our choices in those moments?

Please stop and take some time to think about this.

Maybe set down your book and think of several ways that you would respond if,

Say,

A librarian was preoccupied and somewhat rude to you.

Our first reaction might be to feel insulted and angry,

And that's perfectly normal.

As we've spent so much of our lives looking for love,

Approval,

And nurturance from the world around us,

It's only natural to be somewhat taken aback when we don't receive these things.

Now,

Instead of reacting blindly to these emotions,

Take a moment and observe them.

Notice what is going on inside for you.

Become aware of your inner world and the emotions and sensations that you're experiencing.

In this case,

You might quietly and patiently say to yourself,

Hmm,

I see anger and shame rising up,

And in this moment,

They're quite strong,

Especially shame.

By responding in this way,

We can learn to automatically step back into ourselves,

Notice what we're feeling,

And then plan our next move.

If we aren't being mindful,

However,

We might huff off silently and carry the insult around with us,

Not even acknowledging how we truly feel.

Instead,

We might let our emotions out around those we feel more comfortable with,

Such as our spouses,

Children,

Or pets.

By realizing this,

We can begin to see how much of the violence and abuse in our world could be stopped if people began accepting how they truly felt and learned to deal with their emotions instead of throwing them on others.

And how exactly are we supposed to deal with our emotions?

Sounds like quite a soft and psychoanalytical way to live,

Doesn't it?

Quite touchy-feely and new age.

Well,

It isn't.

To understand and use our inner compass,

Which is shown to us constantly through our sensations and feelings,

Makes us a warrior of the highest order.

Men,

Women,

And children who are taking responsibility for their words,

Actions,

And feelings are doing the most difficult thing that any human being can do.

Facing our inner world is trial by fire.

It is embracing life and being unable to move from the task at hand.

Looking always deeper with eyes and heart that grow ever stronger,

Clearer,

And compassionate is not a path for the faint of heart.

This is the most difficult thing that anyone can do and is in no way dependent on outer strength or macho bravado.

In fact,

Men may have a harder time,

At least initially,

Moving on to this path because our society falsely honors blind bravery,

Coldness,

And an unwillingness to bend in its sons and,

Increasingly,

In its daughters.

For every cold-eyed soldier who is taught to abandon his feelings,

We have another person who has closed himself off to his true potential and,

Ironically,

To the most advanced weapon he could ever possess.

This is a weapon of unlimited strength,

Yet it cannot be used to slay an enemy or conquer a neighboring land.

This weapon,

Our own self-awareness,

Can be used to turn darkness into light and wrong into right,

And the more we unleash it,

The more we begin to see how any act of destruction is detrimental to all.

This weapon would convince all soldiers to drop their arms and use their energy to mend and heal their differences instead of reinforcing them.

So for men who have long been taught to act in ways that are hard and silent,

Please have patience.

Please understand that by choosing this weapon of truth and compassion,

You're doing the most important thing possible for yourself,

Your brothers,

Your sisters,

And your world.

We must learn to respect our feelings and sensitivities and realize that there's nothing wise or strong about stumbling around in the dark just because we're too manly or scared to turn on the light.

And our ability to bring our awareness to the reality of all of our emotions,

To acknowledge and embrace them,

Is our light switch,

And it takes more courage than most are aware they possess to reach for this switch time and again,

Moment after moment.

When we're seemingly caught in a difficult inner situation,

The first step we have to take is to admit that it is a difficult inner situation.

We must be willing to accept that at times we are uncomfortable being filled with painful emotions.

We need to acknowledge the difficulty we have being present with ourselves when our inner world is upset.

This is the first step in being true to ourselves,

In being a champion of our spirit.

When we experience an uncomfortable emotion such as anger or shame,

We must first accept that we're feeling it.

This can be one of the most difficult steps,

For our ego and pride do not enjoy being stirred up in this way.

We may falsely believe that we're above life,

That we shouldn't have to encounter any discomfort as a result of another's behavior and how we squirm when we do.

We want to lash out,

Fight back,

Or retreat ashamedly and lick our wounds.

And we may want to hold on to the anger or fear.

This situation threatens to destroy our inner peace,

Our whole day,

Or even longer.

Our inner child and our fragile ego have been hurt and damn it,

They're going to let us know it.

And unconsciously,

We let them take over,

Falling prey to their temper tantrum,

We engage in one of our own,

Huffing and puffing in anger or silently feeling resentful and sorry for ourselves.

And yet herein lies a great insight,

We don't have to act like small children crying over simple slights.

We can,

Instead,

Hold our inner pain as a parent might hold a wounded child.

Although we can't take the child's pain away,

We can be present for them.

We can offer them compassion and acceptance and allow them to express themselves and their feelings in our safe and loving arms.

And to be this parent,

We simply have to observe ourselves,

To be with ourselves.

The next time we get angry,

Perhaps we can try watching it for a moment before letting it overwhelm us.

If we're able to sit with the anger,

And one way of doing this is to notice which particular sensations we're feeling,

We can begin to discover the calm,

Eternally patient and loving parent that exists inside all of us.

We can begin to see how we might distance ourselves from the need to blindly react to our inner pain and discomfort.

We can learn to stay with ourselves in a nurturing,

Loving,

And very brave way,

Instead of squirming and lashing out in retaliation at having our false sense of inner peace disturbed.

We can begin to understand how true peace and strength are found by observing our inner workings and start to develop a sense of presence in any situation.

We can begin responding to life and to ourselves with maturity,

Compassion,

And self-respect.

And so,

We enter step two of our library experience.

Taking into consideration everything we've just read,

We can begin to see that a world of opportunities and options are open to us in every moment.

We can begin to find a sense of empowerment in our ability to act in ways which are truthful to us.

We can start to trust ourselves and let go of our old patterns of reacting and behaving in ways that have,

For a long time,

Caused us and those around us harm.

We can begin to understand the opportunity that life is handing us in every moment to grow and change,

And we can start learning from our every encounter.

We can let our emotions be exactly as they are and mindfully choose how we might respond to them.

We can discover a sense of empowerment and liberation that's born of the awareness that we're no longer slaves to life or our emotions.

We can begin to act in ways that feel right and that help us and those we encounter.

Whenever we notice uncomfortable feelings rising up within us,

We can choose which step to take next.

Often,

The best choice is to take some time to investigate the situation and determine why it has stirred up our emotions.

We should always do our best to look behind the scenes to see if we can figure out exactly what's going on for us.

In the case of the librarian,

We might choose to let his or her behavior go,

Knowing that if this person were happier in their own life,

They would probably treat others better.

Or maybe we would calmly and firmly state our feelings and needs in order to assert our desire to be treated with respect.

Or perhaps we would smile,

Walk away,

And come back with a small bouquet of flowers to brighten their day.

Or maybe we would react in the same old way,

By lashing out or hiding our pain within us.

No matter our response or reaction to any situation,

We should remember to be gentle with ourselves.

We do not have to hurt ourselves needlessly.

We do not have to live a life of tightness,

Smallness,

And pain because of some uncomfortable experience,

No matter how important it seems at the time.

Perhaps the thing that we're hanging on to and hurting ourselves over will be forgotten in 5,

10,

Or 20 years.

Or perhaps 5,

10,

Or 20 minutes.

Whatever the case,

Why not choose to let it go now and move on with our lives?

Why not embrace the next situation afresh,

Wiser in the knowledge that life has given us?

Why not look around for our next lesson?

Why not touch our souls by being grateful for the patience and commitment that we've shown to ourselves?

Why not continue to grow instead of letting a past hurt or defeat keep us locked in the same old place?

Perhaps we can allow the discomfort of an uncomfortable experience to be within us for a while,

Instead of attempting to silence the feelings life is trying to get us to accept.

As we embrace ourselves and acknowledge all of our emotions,

We open our hearts to joy,

Sadness,

And the entire experience that is our life.

As we feel our fears and live our truths,

We allow our past to lead us toward a better future.

As we begin accepting whatever we're feeling at any moment,

Our pain will slowly heal and we will grow in happiness and inner peace.

As we continue doing this,

We'll realize that self-love is found in every step that we take toward greater acknowledgement and acceptance of our thoughts and our feelings,

Our fears and our desires,

Our loves and our losses.

Reviews

Wonderful advice how to acknowledge our emotions and choose our response. Thank you Geoff, and I am back from my Polish family visits. ☀️🙏🏾🤗🍀🧡