Joy As An Antidote To Despair

How do we attend to joy through mindfulness? Find out in this talk and meditation. This practice is brought to you by the Flourish Foundation, a social profit dedicated to inspiring systemic change through heartmind cultivation, promoting personal well-being, benevolent social action, and environmental stewardship.

Transcript

I know for myself,

I really feel like the topic of joy,

Particularly this month,

More than other months,

Is challenging to touch into.

I know for myself that I can so easily fall into despair and cynicism,

And there's a lot of help right now with my friends.

And by my friends,

I would say,

Certainly within my own intimate circle of family and friends,

The conversations are largely around the enormous challenges that we face,

And then outside of our circle of friends.

Overwhelmingly,

I think it's fair to say that the media is really massively focused on what's going wrong in the world,

Whether it be through the pandemic,

Through the social injustice,

Politically.

There's just so many avenues for us to explore where if we,

I know for myself,

And I think this is true for many others,

If we pay sole allegiance to just that,

And we have this one-sided view of reality that everything is wrong,

I think the most realistic response is either despair,

Cynicism,

Or anxiety.

And why wouldn't it be,

Just given the enormous threats that appear to be out there?

And so joy,

I feel,

Serves as a very welcomed antidote,

And one of the most inspiring quotes that I learned actually going all the way back to my days in college from a professor,

Alan Wallace,

Who was running a religious studies department at UC Santa Barbara,

Was a quote by William James that spoke to the importance of how our attention formulates or constructs our experience of reality.

And what William James said is,

For the moment,

What we attend to becomes reality.

And so if we single-pointedly invest all of our attention on what's wrong in the world,

Then from our perspective,

The world will be wrong.

It will be bad.

It will be a place where it's unfriendly.

And on the other hand,

If we,

And I know for myself,

It requires great discipline,

If we're not turning our back on that per se,

Because that is a part of reality.

So it's not about let's become Pollyanna-ish and put on like rose-tinted glasses and just pretend like,

What pandemic?

What social injustice?

What political or economic strife?

And just pretend like it's all being fabricated.

But can we,

While being aware of that,

Can we broaden the focus of our attention so that we can actually start to notice things that are going well and really starting as close as we can to our own experience.

So we don't have to look out and see like,

Where's the positive news,

But what about things just in our immediate experience of,

God,

My shoulders are relaxed in this moment.

That's not so bad.

This cushion that I'm sitting on is kind of nice.

In fact,

We're sitting in a space that has been provided entirely by the generosity of someone else.

That's not so bad.

So already,

If I start to skillfully direct my attention,

I know when I fall into this place of despair as an antidote,

I can start to climb out and see if cognitively I find my focus just becoming so narrow and so contracted around what's wrong.

There's an option.

There's a choice.

It's not easy,

But there's a choice to back out and have a wider perspective and see,

Okay,

This is true.

There's these challenges,

But there's also things that I can really attend to that are positive,

That can be a source of joy,

Of gratitude,

Of fulfillment.

So it's really in that spirit then that here we are,

We're in this very cloistered environment.

No one's coming in requiring much of us.

No one's going to come in and be,

What are you people doing here sitting and minding your own business like that?

You should be productive.

We have this space is dedicated so we can come and cultivate our heart and mind.

We have time for reflection.

So within this environment,

Then we have an opportunity to start familiarizing ourselves with what is it like when we skillfully intentionally direct our attention to things that could be a potential catalyst or source of joy for ourselves.

Then the idea in doing this kind of practice is as we develop that familiarity,

We then by the power of mindfulness,

Which we could just very simply define in this context,

Is the capacity to bear something in mind.

By having this familiarity of being able to attend to joy and then coming out of this environment,

Then throughout the day,

The idea would be,

Can we by way of mindfulness,

Start to draw upon that familiarity in our everyday experience.

So as we're walking down the street,

We can see,

God,

It's a nice sunny day rather than what are those people doing looking at me?

They must be and start to shift our way toward this larger view of reality where we're not just accounting for what's challenging,

What's wrong,

But we're also creating space for things that are going right.

That could be a potential source of joy.

So I think it's probably something that's been said for millennia with people teaching reflective practices where I'm sure it's kind of like a mantra,

Now more than ever,

This is more important.

But really it does feel like this.

At least in my lifetime,

I've never experienced a pandemic.

I don't think any of us have.

Not to this magnitude in this degree that's had the implications that it's had.

And yet how do we cope?

How do we find an inner ballast where we can maintain a sense of optimism,

A sense of joy where we're not falling into a bottomless pit of despair?

So it's a challenge for sure.

And if you're like me,

Most of the conversations will tend to focus on this is what's wrong,

Here are the challenges that we face.

It's just all over the place.

You don't have to go very far to find that.

And so the challenge is can we resurrect another aspect of reality that maybe we haven't attended to and by focusing our attention there,

Then for us,

That becomes reality that there are aspects of our lived experience here and now that are enjoyable,

That can enlist a sense of wellbeing.

So that'll be the meditation.

We'll see if we can focus on that and we'll see how it goes.

And start by establishing a comfortable posture,

Something that could be a reliable source of experiencing the joy of being supported,

Being grounded,

Of being settled,

Of being content.

And choosing for yourself,

Is it more beneficial in this moment to close the eyes or would you prefer to keep the eyes open?

In which case you can allow the gaze to be vacant.

And let your awareness fill the space of the body.

Resting upon the dynamic flow of sensation and feeling that arises from one moment to the next.

And while touching more deeply into this lived experience of the body,

You may come to recognize that there are parts of the body that are at ease,

Relaxed,

And there may be other parts of the body that feel contracted or tight.

And now through the power of attention,

Let's see if we can initiate a process where we begin to reveal the joy of relief,

Of letting go,

Of unwinding.

We can do this by heightening our awareness in any part of the body that feels tight.

And then as you breathe in,

Welcome a sense of expansion.

And as you breathe out,

Initiate a process of release,

Of letting go.

And for yourself,

Can our intentions influence our physical body in any way?

Again,

Breathing in,

Welcoming the sense of expansion,

Breathing out.

Relaxing and releasing.

Percewing the seeds of intention to soften in one area freely.

Heighten your awareness in another.

And at your own pace,

Using the rhythm of the breath,

Breathing out,

Establishing relaxation,

Not drawing of the breath.

And along with revealing a deeper sense of relaxation.

Explore the joy of simply resting,

Of resting in the simplicity of being,

Not having to go anywhere,

Not having to do anything,

Not having to affirm ourselves outwardly in any way,

Simply being as you are.

And then along with this relaxation and this stillness of being,

Can you reveal the joy of curiosity,

Of wakefulness?

And again,

We can utilize the breath to explore this in a more embodied way.

And see if you can consolidate the expansion of the inhale along the front of the spine from the lower belly to the crown of the head,

Bringing forth a sense of vitality in your posture,

Bringing forth a sense of vitality in your posture,

And upon this foundation,

Let's move a bit deeper and explore the joy of relinquishing control.

We can do this in relationship to the breath.

And as you notice the incoming and outgoing breath,

What is it like to breathe effortlessly without making any attempt to alter the breath in any way?

Feeling as if the body is being breathed by an outside source or agent.

And finally,

Let's extend this quality of relaxation of ease to the immaterial space of the mind and explicitly,

Can you reveal the joy of freedom in the mind,

Allowing whatever comes to mind to simply come and go while resting in the stillness of awareness and experiencing the freedom of not being riveted,

Captured by thought and letting thoughts arise and pass.

And of course,

If we bring attention to the mind and we notice that we begin to grip or contract around a particular mental event,

Then as we did earlier with the body,

Breathing out,

Relaxing,

Loosening up,

Coming to rest and the spaciousness of awareness of allowing whatever arises to simply come and go.

And maybe for just an instant tasting this joy of freedom.

Okay.

And now as a way of training our palette or of refining our attention to acknowledge that which is pleasant in our field of experience,

Let your awareness simultaneously be open to all the five physical senses,

Your sense of touch,

Of hearing,

Of taste,

Smell,

And any visual impressions that you may be aware of.

And as you open to this very broad domain of experience,

Knowable through the five physical senses,

Observe whatever impressions arise without any restraint,

Without any resistance,

Continuing to rest in open awareness.

And on occasion,

While resting in this open awareness,

We may notice an impression that catalyzes a sense of enjoyment,

A momentary episode of pleasure.

Could be the simple pleasure of noticing the softness of a cushion underneath or the unanticipated muscular release around the shoulders,

The neck,

Or somewhere else in the body.

Whatever the catalyst,

If it arouses a sense of joy,

Be sure to highlight that with attention.

An experience for yourself,

What is it like when we attend to the reality of enjoyment,

Of joyous savoring momentary pleasures as they arise.

Savoring momentary pleasures as they arise.

And again,

This exercise is not an activity to discount or ignore difficulty,

But simply exercising our capacity to more freely experience enjoyment whenever it arises.

Even in the most simple experience of sitting,

Breathing,

Being aware.

And again,

This exercise is not an activity to discount or ignore difficulty,

But an experience to discount.

And if you notice this open awareness,

Again,

Narrowly contracting,

Getting caught up and carried away out of this momentary experience.

Then again,

Allow your response to be one of release,

Of simply loosening up,

Letting go,

Releasing the grip around whatever you've taken a hold of and coming back and anchoring in the experience of the five physical senses,

Highlighting any moments of enjoyment if they arise.

And again,

This exercise is not an activity to discount or ignore difficulty,

But an experience to discount and you may notice in this exercise that there's a tendency,

A bias toward noticing what is wrong.

And if this is the case,

Just simply notice that tendency in yourself.

And again,

Explore what is it like to notice what feels right?

And we have the mental pliancy to attend to pleasant and unpleasant experiences.

And again,

This is an exercise that is not an activity to discount or ignore.

And again,

This exercise is not an activity to discount or ignore.

And again,

This exercise is not an activity to discount or ignore.

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