Welcome to Enhancing Recovery Part 1.
I'm Dr.
Lynn Brown.
Today's topic is Communication Skills Part 2,
Frame of Reference Components.
Each of us has a filtering system when communicating with others,
And the components of the filtering system affect the interpretation of what is being said.
So always refer to these components when communicating with someone.
Age A person's age can have a big influence on how they interpret what you are saying.
Words often have different meanings to varying generations of people.
For example,
The word gay used to mean happy.
How do you feel your age influences your interpretation of what others say to you?
In what ways do you want to become aware of the significance of age on interpretation in your communication?
Attitude Our attitude changes based upon our current situation.
So when communicating with someone,
It is important that you are aware of what is happening with the listener and how this person's current attitude will influence how you communicate.
How do you feel your attitude influences how you respond to others?
Background Someone's background has a huge influence on who they are and the approach they have to life.
Be sure to take someone's background into consideration when speaking with them.
What in your background tends to influence your interpretation of what you are hearing when communicating?
And how does your background influence how you communicate?
Beliefs Our beliefs provide the foundation of our lives,
So they definitely influence how we function.
Therefore,
Knowing someone's beliefs when communicating is helpful.
How do your beliefs influence your communication?
Education Education changes us.
We learn skills and terms,
Language,
That those with a different education do not possess.
So be sure not to use specific terminology when communicating with someone who doesn't have a similar education.
Do you have an education that uses terminology?
If so,
Be careful not to use it unless you are talking with a colleague.
Experience It isn't just traumatic experiences that influence how we respond to words used by others.
How we interpret our experiences also influence our responses.
Be aware,
If possible,
Of the experiences the listener has had when you are communicating.
And be sensitive to how your experiences influence your response when someone is communicating with you.
Interests It enhances the quality of the communication when you are aware of the interests of the listener and use them to provide examples.
Do you have interests that influence you?
Knowledge What we know about tends to influence what we talk about.
Be thoughtful when talking to others.
Don't assume that they know what you know.
Do you have specific knowledge that others may not have?
Memories Memories are very powerful in both enhancing and debilitating ways.
Be aware that you may provoke memories in the listener when communicating.
Be sensitive if you notice a change in the tone of the dialogue.
But also notice and enjoy when memories are being used as a bonding opportunity during communication.
Do you have any memories that could influence your response in a dialogue?
Occupation Like education and knowledge,
Someone's occupation can definitely influence interpretation during a conversation.
Use positively the listener's occupation whenever possible.
It will enhance the satisfaction of the experience.
But also be sensitive about how their occupation may cause discomfort while you are communicating.
Does your occupation influence how you interpret what someone is saying to you?
Prejudices While we want to think we don't have them,
We do.
If possible,
Know the prejudices of the listener so you don't say something in a way that will shut down communication.
It's fine to talk about prejudices,
But it is imperative that you are open to hearing what the other person has to say.
What are your prejudices that can influence your willingness to listen?
Values As we have discussed,
Values are the rules we live by on a daily basis.
So,
Knowing the listener's values can assist in making sure their interpretation of what you have said is what you want it to be.
Relating to the listener by knowing and using their values creates positive dialogue.
Take time to determine what values you live by that could influence the quality of your communication as a listener as well as a speaker.
Gender There are generalized differences between genders.
Men tend to be goal-driven,
So they want only information that will take them toward their goal.
You start a communication with a male by giving the headline.
Should he feel the need for more information,
He will ask.
Women tend to be process-oriented,
So they want details.
Therefore,
When communicating with a woman,
Feel free to share any and all aspects of what you want to say.
Of course,
Not all men and women reflect the generalizations,
So notice if the male is still paying attention.
If he is,
It's worthwhile to keep sharing.
And if you notice the woman is no longer paying attention,
It's time to stop talking.
In general,
Be aware of how much or little the person is focusing.
Copyright 2017,
Lynn Baranius-Brown.
Published by Best Life Publications.
No part of this audio recording may be reproduced without permission from the copyright owner.
