Welcome to Enhancing Recovery Part 1.
I'm Dr.
Lynn Brown.
Today's topic is decision making.
One fundamental issue that needs to be raised when thinking about decision making is our inherent freedom to choose.
We often see our world as restrictive.
We see everything happening to us with little opportunity to choose.
So let's take a moment to think about what it is we have the freedom to choose.
Regardless of our circumstances,
We have the following freedom of choices.
One,
We are surrounded by so many stimuli that we are incapable of focusing on all of them.
Therefore,
We choose what it is we pay attention to.
Let's do an experiment.
Close your eyes and guess what color the floor or carpet in the room is without opening your eyes.
Now,
Open your eyes.
Did you guess the actual color?
If you did,
Then color is an important aspect of life for you.
If you didn't guess correctly,
Color doesn't play an important role.
There is so much around us that we can only pay attention and process very little of it.
We actually pick and choose what we notice and hold onto in our lives.
This means we have the power to choose to notice other aspects of life if the ones we're noticing are causing us to feel powerless in some way.
Two,
Nothing in life has any meaning.
It is neutral.
Therefore,
We choose what meaning we place on everything.
At first,
This may sound strange because most of us have an opinion about almost everything all the time.
And without realizing it,
We assume everyone else has the same opinion.
And when we realize others don't,
We are surprised.
You may be saying to yourself,
I'm not surprised when others don't see the world as I do.
But if you have any sort of negative reaction,
Frustration,
Anger,
Or desire to correct,
You have in fact been surprised.
This is because we tend to believe that our view is correct and therefore should be adhered to by others.
So when they don't,
It seems strange and often confusing.
Of course,
This doesn't really make sense.
No two people are alike and no two people have had the exact same experiences.
So each of us is going to perceive the world differently because our perceptions come from the stories we tell ourselves about our experiences.
And our perceptions influence the meanings we place on everything.
How we look in an event leads to what it means to us.
The good news is that our perceptions are alterable.
We can change the story we tell ourselves about our experiences.
Therefore,
There is never any one unchangeable meaning to anything.
This means we are powerful.
We are the authors of the meaning of each and every experience we have.
And by recognizing this,
We behave in a way that acknowledges that others see the world in their unique ways.
Three,
There is no one set response to anything.
Therefore,
We choose how we respond to everything that occurs.
Using the idea of perception equals behavior,
We can then say that with a change in perception comes an automatic change in behavior.
So in order to make a permanent change in behavior,
You need to make a change in your perception.
An example of this is when we are driving and someone cuts us off.
Most of us tend to get angry instantaneously.
But if we notice the person driving is someone we know and like,
We will automatically become less upset and we'll probably find some explanation for their error.
Our perception of them as a friend alters our behavior.
Using this information gives some thought to what you are paying attention to in your life.
Are you still noticing and making significant what you were paying attention to when you were still drinking?
If so,
Identify what you made important and then determine what you will be making important in your life as a sober person.
Become aware of what meaning you are placing on experiences in your life.
What you determined as important while you were drinking more than likely is no longer valuable.
Remember,
Nothing in life has any meaning.
So now that you are sober,
Take time to decide what has meaning to you,
Making sure that your choices encourage you to value what will make long-term sobriety possible.
Notice your responses,
Your behavioral choices to events.
Are some of them no longer useful because you are sober?
If so,
Be sure to change your perceptions of these events to accommodate your desire to respond in ways that will make it easier to remain sober.
Because nothing in life has any inherent meaning,
You choose the meaning you place on events,
And your behavior reflects your perceptions,
You are incredibly powerful.
Remember that your interpretation of something is what gives it meaning.
This will remind you that your life is up to you.
