(Wk 19) Secret To Success - Unleash Your Peace Podcast

If we can learn anything from anyone, we can learn invaluable life lessons from kids. It is my belief that children are closer to our Source of Beingness than we are, and that we have a great deal to learn from them. In this week's podcast episode, I interview 9-year-old competitive dancer Launa Shahrestani, who shares with us her insights on how to overcome fear and shares with us the secret to a successful and happy life.

Transcript

Hello and welcome back to Unleash Your Peace.

My name is Elly Shojia.

I am your host.

I'm a positive mindset coach,

A personal transformation expert,

A deliberate creator,

And I am your peace trainer.

And this podcast over here,

Unleash Your Peace,

Is your peace training.

Every single week,

We talk about a different topic about the internal world.

And why do we do that?

It's because your joy,

Your happiness,

The source of your creativity,

Everything that brings any kind of value and meaning to your life,

That resides inside of you.

It's not outside.

It's on the inside.

And when we dive inward,

We unlock that joy within ourselves and we live our best lives yet.

The quality of our lives doesn't just incrementally improve when we live in this way.

We exponentially innovate every aspect of our experiences on this physical plane.

And as a result of that,

You become an uplifter.

You become somebody who has incredible impact on this world.

And that's my wish for you.

That's my wish for everybody.

I want all of us to level up together.

So today I have a very special guest.

I've known this person,

This individual since she was born and she is perhaps one of my favorite people on this planet.

I love her with all my heart.

She actually has my heart.

She's not my daughter,

But she is close to that.

She's my sister's daughter,

Lana.

And the reason I want her to speak with you today is because this child,

This girl has so much insight about how to deal with fear.

Being afraid of going after what you want.

We learn to cater to that fear as we get older,

But when we're younger,

We don't.

We actually go after the things we want a lot more fearlessly despite the fear.

We actually don't even cater to it.

We don't know about it.

We just go after it.

And I believe personally,

I believe that it is because children are closer to the source of our beingness than we are as adults.

We actually forget how to connect to that source of inspiration,

To that source of our being when we age.

You see,

Lana is a competitive dancer.

She has been for years now and she is only nine years old and she gets on that stage every single year.

Last year,

She started doing a solo and she placed first place.

And if we can learn anything from anyone,

We can learn from children because they do the things that scare them.

It scares them,

But they do it anyway.

And today,

I do want to talk about that fear,

What it takes to push through that fear and why we do anything at all.

So Lana,

Welcome first of all to Unleash Your Peace.

And why don't you introduce yourself and tell us a little bit about what you do?

Hi,

My name is Lana Sherastani and I'm nine years old and I'm in fourth grade and I do dance.

And how long have you been dancing?

Since I was three years old.

And what is the thing that you love most about dancing?

What I like about dance is just like the feeling of it.

Like when I was little,

I liked moving a lot.

So I thought I should just do dance to get better at it.

And the feeling that I like is just the happiness and the moving.

And you're part of a dance team?

Yes,

The dance team is called Shavarria Institute of the Arts.

Last year,

You had a huge accomplishment where you actually got your own solo.

Yes,

I also have a new solo this year too.

Tell me a little bit,

I know,

I mean,

I've known you your entire life.

And I've seen you just kind of flourish as a dancer.

Tell us a little bit about what goes through your head when you are about to get on that stage and dance.

So first,

I'm just a little bit nervous,

But I think I'll,

What I think is just,

I'll do great and just have fun.

Would you say that as you go through your day,

What is the number one thing that you think about?

The number one thing that I think about is like happiness and like,

I don't know,

It's just like amazing.

So feeling good.

Is there anything that makes you afraid?

Yeah,

It's like,

What makes me afraid is like,

Before I do something that's like really important to me.

Would you elaborate on that?

Before I go on stage,

Especially,

That's my most thing I'm afraid of usually,

But I just shake it off.

How do you shake it off?

Just physically or is there something you do mentally to shake it off as well?

I think of happiness,

Like happy things and I just believe in myself.

What is it that you actually think about when you think of happy things?

I think of like,

How I know how to do everything in that dance because my dance teacher wouldn't put that in if I didn't know how to do it.

That's what I think.

And if you don't,

Let's say,

Get first place,

What goes through your head?

Does that make you want to quit?

Or what happens for you?

No,

It's just about having fun.

It doesn't matter if you get even 10th place,

It's just about having fun.

And even if I know it's not about the place,

But I could get a better place next time.

So Lana,

I want to talk to you a little bit about kids versus grownups.

What are some things that you have kind of observed that kids do better or things that you think grownups do better?

Sometimes I think what kids do better is like,

They understand more about happiness.

They just get it more and like,

They just like,

Feel it more than adults sometimes.

And what I think adults have more sometimes is like,

They feel like they know what their kids have a lot,

Like they know what they want,

But sometimes the kids don't like what the adults want them to have.

Do you believe that you can do anything that you want to do that you set your mind to?

Yes.

If you like,

Just want to do something in your heart,

Just go for it and it'll take you somewhere good.

What do you say to people who say,

Well,

I need to know that it's going to work out before I can try this?

I know how you guys want to know like how it is before you try it,

But you just have to like,

Go to it,

You know anything like you just have to do it or else you're not going to be able to do it for your whole life so you can't just think all year,

Something you just have to go through.

And what if I go for it and I fail?

You don't give up,

You just have,

You can never fail in a sport,

You have to keep trying and trying till you get like to the top of your goal.

I really like what you just said,

You said you can never fail at a sport.

What do you mean by that?

I mean like you can never give up,

Like there's no such thing as that in life,

You just have to do a sport and you finish it to the end.

There's no going back,

There's only going up.

So an analogy I like to use with a lot of my clients is that your keys are always going to be in the last place that you look for them,

Right?

So if I'm looking for the keys,

They're not in the first place that I look for,

They're not in the fifth place or the 10th place I look for them,

I keep looking for them,

Right?

And the reason I do that is because I know the keys exist and they are someplace.

I don't say,

Oh,

I can't find the keys so I just need to trash that car,

Right?

That would be kind of ridiculous.

And what I'm hearing from you is something similar is that failure doesn't exist because if you're not where you want to be,

You just haven't gotten there yet.

Is that what you mean?

Yes.

That's what I mean.

Like if you're searching digging for gold,

If you're still going,

You just kept going and you give up,

That's not good because it could be right there,

The last dig,

But you just didn't go.

Yeah.

That is a really astute analogy.

Where did you get that from?

Well,

Once my mom showed me an image of that,

Like he was just digging and all of a sudden there was a last dig and he got to the gold,

But he just gave up.

Really powerful visual.

Here's the other thing that I think is really interesting.

So you do dance,

Which is very physical.

It's very much about the experience of something.

But even with dance,

There are competitions that you participate in and you can get a trophy and you can place and so forth.

How do you balance what the goal is?

Is your goal getting that trophy and getting the recognition or is it to just get on stage and dance and know how to do these movements or is there some other goal?

Is there some kind of a goal that you have in your mind when you go into dancing or what is it?

What is the thing?

What is the one thing that is motivating you and exciting you and bringing you happiness?

I don't think my number one thing is just to get a trophy.

I think the number one thing for me is to just go on stage and do your best.

That's really nice.

And what do you gain when you do that?

It's just this feeling that helps me.

I just give all I could give.

I just think everything you're saying is so profound.

You're saying it in a really simple and understandable way and you're only nine years old and these concepts that we talk about on this podcast that I was just at a conference with 300 entrepreneurs.

You know what an entrepreneur is?

People have their own businesses.

So I'm at this conference with 300 entrepreneurs and this is exactly what a lot of the conversation is about because people have great ideas.

People have great businesses.

They have an incredible service that they're providing to the world but they feel afraid to go out there and do it and the things they get stumped on is what if I don't get that trophy?

What if I don't get the recognition?

What if my business doesn't make money?

What if nobody likes it and nobody appreciates it?

And here you are at nine years old,

Competitive dancer saying to us,

It's not about the trophy.

It's about the feeling I get when I go on stage and give it my all.

Did you always know that you wanted to be a dancer?

Yeah.

I said like when I was three,

I just like even when I was before three,

I just knew like I wanted to dance.

Like first I was just like moving around and I was like,

I like this.

So I just knew I wanted to do dance.

So your mom is my sister and she's a Persian woman,

Iranian.

And for those of you listeners who don't know,

It's very unusual for a Persian family to invest all this time and money and resources and attention in something like dance because Persians want their kids to grow up and be doctors and lawyers and businessmen and things like that.

Do you get a lot of pressure from your family to pursue those things or are they totally okay with your choice of dance?

Well,

Like my mom,

She's totally okay with my dance.

She's like,

I want you to grow up and be like a really good dancer or a dance teacher and stuff like that.

But a lot of my family also say like,

I want you to be a doctor or a lawyer and all that stuff,

But I'm just going to stick to what my mom said.

Yeah.

I've heard your mom say that to you and your sister,

Your older sister is a cheerleader and you're both just so incredibly talented at the things that you do.

And what message do you have for parents?

Because I know that you probably have friends who don't have parents who let them do the thing they're passionate about,

Right?

You want to speak to that a little bit?

Yeah.

Like a lot of my friends at school,

They're even at dance.

They don't want to do dance or stuff like that.

Their mom is just like pushing them to do it,

But like they don't want to do it.

So I think you should just do what you want to do and what you're passionate to do,

Like what you were born to do.

To those parents who say,

Well,

My child doesn't know what's good for them.

They don't understand the world.

You know,

I understand the world.

I know that,

You know,

If they are not a doctor or a lawyer or an engineer or something like that,

They're going to suffer.

Right.

So what do you say to those parents?

What I say to those parents is just like,

Calm down a little bit,

Like let them do what they want to do.

And like,

It's what they're passionate in.

Like,

It's what they want to do,

Like what they want to do for their life,

What they're happy to be.

And what's the benefit of letting your kid follow their dream?

What the benefit is,

Is like it's going to lead them to something great in their life.

Like what they want to do,

They're going to get good at it and then they'll be like great at what their goal is going to be.

Tell me a little bit about your process,

Right?

Because you just said,

If you let your kid follow what they're passionate about,

They're going to be really great at it,

Right?

And that greatness doesn't just happen overnight.

And I've watched you and also your sister for years just practicing your routines at home.

You know,

With her,

It was gymnastics and tumbling and constantly tumbling everywhere,

Right?

And then you have a board at home,

You practice your dance moves at home.

You were doing a crazy number of spins every day because you were trying to figure out how to do the spin.

So tell me a little bit about,

Talk to me a little bit about that.

What happens when you let a child basically find what they're first of all passionate about and then give them the resources to explore that passion?

So what I do to get good is just like keep trying and trying.

Even with your kids,

Like if you do what they want,

They can go home and they could just keep practicing and practicing.

And how much do you practice every day?

Well,

I practice a lot.

I basically just after dance,

I just go home and practice my routines.

How many hours a day would you say you're practicing?

At dance,

I think I practice like three,

Four,

Two,

Three hours kind of.

And so I basically go from like four to seven and I just practice a lot.

And then when I come home,

I just practice some more and that's how you get better.

When you're practicing,

Does it feel like you're doing a chore or is it fun?

No,

It's fun.

It's not like you're just doing it for like a job.

Well,

It is a job,

But like it's not you're just doing it not for fun.

Like you're doing this for fun and it's like a breath of air.

You're doing it for yourself.

And then you create a career for yourself where you are having fun while contributing to the world.

What do you think would happen,

Lana?

If every person on the planet from the time they are three or four years old is given permission to find that thing that they're passionate about?

For you,

It's dance.

For somebody else,

It might be playing the piano or whatever it is,

Doing bodybuilding or weightlifting.

So what would happen if every person was given that permission to figure out what they are passionate about and then given some basic resources to help them get really,

Really good at it as you're getting really good at it?

How would the world change?

I think that would be great.

And that's how life's supposed to be.

Like it's supposed to be like whatever you want.

And I think if we keep doing that,

Then that would actually happen.

But what would happen to the world if everybody did that?

The world would just be like happy and it would just be like it wouldn't be hard.

It would be just easier and it would be happier in life.

That's absolutely true.

And again,

Like I was at this conference and essentially the message was exactly what you just summarized in two sentences,

Which is that when you do what you're passionate about,

You become of service to the world.

So do you feel like you are of service?

Yeah,

I feel like I am and a lot of people could be if like all the people in the world could be if they just keep practicing and their parents let them and it would just be like a great world.

This brings me to a really interesting thing that if you're doing what you're passionate about and you're having fun and you are happy,

So you prioritize doing things that you're happy about,

Right,

That make you happy,

Then you are of greater service to the world because you are making the world a better place just by being happy.

Would you agree with that?

Yes,

I would agree with that because if like if we're just doing what we want,

We're making the world more happy every second.

So Lana,

A lot of people out there want to do something they're passionate about.

They really want to do something that brings them joy,

But they have not asked that question of themselves for such a long time that they don't even know how to find it.

So from the time they were little,

Maybe they were told you need to do this other thing,

Right,

Like some of your friends.

You said your friends,

Some of them don't want to dance,

But then their parents want them to dance.

That's just as bad as if I don't want to be a lawyer and my parents want me to become a lawyer,

Right?

And when that happens at a very young age for us and we kind of feel like we don't have permission to go after the thing we want to do,

There's something,

There's a piece of our brain that we shut off and we no longer ask ourselves that very important question,

What is it that I want to do with my life?

Do you have any advice for somebody who is struggling with that?

They want to find something they're passionate about and they just don't know how to go about doing that.

Yeah.

When you first said how,

From when they were little,

They just didn't say it to their parents.

When you first think about something,

Just say it to your parents and that's how you get your goal.

If you just first say it and not think it,

First you just have to say it and your goal could come true.

So you're meaning that you shouldn't overthink it,

Just trust the intuition?

Yes.

I'm going to put some words in your mouth.

I'm going to interpret what you just said and you tell me if I'm correct or not,

Okay?

Because the way I'm interpreting what you just said is when we get older,

We kind of put this,

My passion,

This thing I'm supposed to do,

We kind of start putting it on a pedestal.

We make it this really big thing that I don't know what it is and it's supposed to be this big grand thing that takes over my life.

It's like the overarching story of my life.

What I'm understanding or interpreting what you're saying,

So beautifully and simply,

Is that you don't need to think of it as this big grand thing.

If you're just thinking it and you feel like you want to do this,

Just do it and you don't know where it's going to take you.

Yes,

That's very true.

For you,

It was just movement.

It's moving your body.

That's what felt good,

Right?

And that's the thing that has led six years down the road to be able to be competing and so forth.

Yeah,

So you need to just do what you want to do.

You just need to think of it and you just have to do it.

That's what I thought.

I just wanted to move and just compete and dance.

So tell us a little bit about what your goals are,

Lana.

What would you like to do with your life if you could have any life that you want?

Well,

My goals are when I grow up is to be a dance owner or a dancer for celebrities.

What do you think it'll take to get there?

What I think will take to get there is just to keep practicing,

Keep doing what you like,

Just never give up.

Lana,

Your competitions are going to start in February.

Are you nervous?

Okay,

So I think everyone's a little bit nervous always,

But I just think it's going to be so fun and it's going to be a great year.

And as I said,

I just think happiness.

And are you going to be sad and upset if you don't get first place?

Nope.

It's just about having fun on stage.

You're going to give it your all?

Yes.

I am so incredibly proud of you and thank you so much for doing this interview,

Lana.

I know that you are not yet on social media.

You don't have an Instagram account yet and we are working on that.

So whenever that becomes available,

I'll link it to the show notes so people can actually see your competitions and your dancing.

And until then,

Can you tell us what dance company you're dancing with?

The dance company I'm dancing with is the Shavarria Institute of the Arts.

Wonderful.

And we will link to that.

I hope listeners,

You have been enjoying this interview with Lana.

She is just so incredibly inspiring.

And if you have kids,

I hope this interview inspired you to ask your child,

What is it that brings you happiness?

What do you want to do?

And actually kind of pay attention to what lights them up.

Because I can tell you from watching these girls,

They will practice hours and hours on end.

They don't stop practicing.

And from all of the greats that I know,

The great pianists and great musicians,

When a child figures out really early on what they're passionate about,

They don't stop practicing.

They just keep doing it.

And that's because it is the thing that lights them up.

And our inner being is wired to gravitate towards the things that light us up.

For me,

It was always writing.

I don't know if you know this about me,

Lana,

But I've always written from the time I could write in like first or second grade.

I've always had a notebook with me and I was writing stories.

So if you can find that thing that your child just naturally does anyways,

You can cultivate it.

You can give them the resources to become the best at it.

And if they can build a career out of that,

They are going to be happy,

Fulfilled adults who are doing their passion rather than going into something that they are not happy about.

And then they have to spend their lives figuring out how to find inner peace.

So thank you so much,

Lana,

For being here.

This was a wonderful,

Wonderful interview,

Wonderful time for me.

And until next time,

When we come back,

Do check out Instagram,

PeaceUnleash.

That's where I share my love notes with you every single day.

I remind you of how perfect and wonderful and beautiful you are.

If you want to work with me at any capacity,

You can reach out to me through peaceunleash.

Com.

And until next week,

When we come back with a whole new topic and maybe even an interview,

I wish you a peace-filled week.