Self-Inquiry 19 - Self-Enquiry Practice

Listen to Ektaji talk about Ramana Maharshi's self-inquiry teachings. These teachings are aimed at the experiential understanding of the true nature of the self and that consciousness is the only existing reality.

Transcript

Salaam.

Salaam.

Salaam.

Salaam.

Salaam.

When I am engaged in inquiry as to the source from which the eye springs,

I arrive at a stage of stillness of mind beyond which I find myself unable to proceed further.

I have no thought of any kind and there is an emptiness,

A blankness.

A mild light pervades and I feel that it is myself,

Bodyless.

I have neither cognition nor vision of body and form.

The experience lasts nearly half an hour and is pleasing.

Would I be correct in concluding that all that was necessary to secure eternal happiness,

That is freedom or salvation or whatever one calls it,

Was to continue the practice till this experience could be maintained for hours,

Days and months together?

Now look at the answer.

This does not mean salvation.

What is salvation?

Liberation or enlightenment.

This is not that.

Such a condition is termed manolaya.

Manolaya is a temporary stillness of thought.

So you check,

Did you go only into a temporary stillness of thought?

Manolaya means concentration.

Temporarily arresting the movement of thoughts.

Only a concentration,

You made that an object,

The emptiness and then you concentrated and you were doing this in that to maintain it.

So you were holding on to the emptiness or the quietness inside.

You're concentrating,

You're stiff.

That is manolaya.

You'll experience the stillness by momentarily arresting the movement of thought.

As soon as this concentration ceases,

Thought's old and new rush in,

As usual.

And even if this temporary lulling of mind should last a thousand years,

It will never lead to total destruction of thought,

Which is what is called liberation from birth and death.

You have to recognize the difference between you forcing and holding and trying to suppress thoughts as opposed to just relaxing into that awareness when you move in.

You manage to turn in,

I agree,

You do the first step correctly.

You move away from the mind,

You go to the stillness inside and then you hold on to it.

There's no holding on.

I'm dramatizing,

You're not doing this like this,

But you're doing it in your mind.

You're trying to hold on to it now.

It should not go,

It should not go.

It's gone already the moment you said it should not go.

Yeah,

If you're doing that,

It is manolaya.

Manolaya means concentration,

Temporarily arresting the movement of thoughts.

As soon as this concentration ceases,

Thoughts old and new rush in as usual.

And even if this temporary lulling of mind should last a thousand years,

It will never lead to total destruction of thought,

Which is what is called the liberation from birth and death.

Destruction of thought is called liberation from birth and death.

The practitioner must therefore be ever on the alert and enquire within as to who has this experience,

Who realizes its pleasantness.

I.

Who is I?

I'll go with them.

Going to that silence from that question is the key.

Just go there and now rest.

Rest.

It is a rest.

Then you'll know when you're resting there,

Then you're not concentrating.

So when you have this feeling of awareness with everything around,

What is it called?

Oneness.

That oneness knows that there is no I.

It's a knowing that there is no individual I.

To whom does this feeling arise?

What is the motive of a feeling that arises?

What is the motive of a perception that arises or a thought that arises?

I.

I am the ego balance.

Perfect.

Identification.

It wants you to identify with it.

Remember,

We discussed this on Friday.

First,

A perception or a feeling arises and then the identification happens with it.

So what is its job?

To make you jump and say I.

But now you're already in this state of oneness.

And now this feeling is coming up or the thought is coming up.

I'm calling it an empty shell.

Why?

Because there is no more I to unite with you.

The tactician must therefore be ever on the alert and enquire within as to who has this experience?

Who realizes its pleasantness?

Without this enquiry,

He will go into a long trance or deep sleep,

Yoga nidra.

Due to absence of a proper guide at this stage of spiritual practice,

Many have been deluded and fallen a prey to a false sense of liberation and only a few have managed to reach the goal safely.

The following story illustrates the point very well.

A yogi was doing penance or tapas for a number of years on the banks of the Ganges.

When he had attained a high degree of concentration,

He believed that continuance in that stage for prolonged periods constituted liberation and practiced it.

One day before going into deep concentration,

He felt thirsty and called to his disciple to bring a little drinking water from the Ganges.

But before the disciple arrived with the water,

He had gone into yoga nidra and remained in that state for countless years,

During which time much water flowed under the bridge.

When he woke up from his experience,

He immediately called,

Water,

Water.

But there was neither his disciple nor the Ganges in sight.

The first thing which he asked for was water because before going into deep concentration,

The topmost layer of thought in his mind was water.

And by concentration,

However deep and prolonged it might have been,

He had only been able temporarily to lull his thoughts.

When he regained consciousness,

This topmost thought flew up with all the speed and force of a flood breaking through the dikes.

If this is the case with regard to a thought which took shape immediately before he sat for meditation,

There is no doubt that thoughts which took root earlier would also remain unannihilated.

If annihilation of thoughts is liberation,

Can he be said to have attained salvation?

No.

What happened in this story,

He was concentrating.

He was probably doing whatever the old traditional methods,

This yogi,

And he went into it for a thousand years.

It's just a story.

He went into it for a thousand years and everything managed by the time he came out and he had the same sanskaras.

So the vasanas did not get wiped off.

In relaxation,

The vasana gets wiped off.

Yeah.

And in this particular method,

The vasana gets wiped off.

Why really?

Empty shell,

We don't pay attention to it.

It's not even me.

I don't have the attachment.

Yeah,

Because first my identification drops.

Identification has dropped.

That is why I'm not identifying with the feeling or thought and even if it is coming up,

I am not giving any food to it.

I'm not making it plump and fat so that vasana is not increasing.

It's reducing,

Reducing.

It's actually withering away,

Starving without the attention.

How does some habit pattern increase in you?

You feed into it.

You feed by what?

By letting it happen.

You're doing it again and again.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

You're talking to the same thought again and again.

You're talking to the same habit pattern again and again.

You're doing it again and again.

That's how it gets fed.

It becomes nice and fat.

But now you're not looking at it.

Your attention is not on it.

Because there is no I,

The one who was going to look is now suddenly in this another state where you're in this oneness.

There is no identification for some time with this.

So this loses its power.

Though it's there,

It's almost as if it doesn't matter.

I don't care if you're there and you're just there,

Just there.

And this will increase with practice.

This flowing feeling,

This oneness,

This awareness being everywhere,

This knowingness will increase.

Yeah.

And you let it increase.

You be there,

Be there,

Be there.

Yeah.

Sadakas or seekers rarely understand the difference between this temporary stilling of the mind called Manolaya and permanent destruction of thoughts,

Manonastha.

In Manolaya,

There is temporary subsidence of thought waves.

And though this temporary period may even last for a thousand years,

Thoughts which are thus temporarily still rise up as soon as the Manolaya ceases.

One must therefore watch one's spiritual progress carefully.

One must not allow oneself to be overtaken by such spells of stillness of thought.

The moment one experiences this,

One must revive consciousness and enquire within as to who is it who experiences this stillness.

Check.

That is your checkpoint.

Yeah.

So highlight it or mark it.

This is my checkpoint.

Who is it who is having this experience?

Though this is a sign of progress towards the goal,

Yet it is also the point where the divergence between the road to liberation and yoga nidra takes place.

The easy way,

The direct way,

The shortest cut to salvation is the enquiry method.

By such enquiry,

You will drive the thought force deeper till it reaches its source and merges therein.

It is then that you will have the response from within and find that you rest there,

Destroying all thoughts once and for all.

Yeah.

Again and again,

Just go to that source.

The moment you go to the source,

There are no thoughts there.

All thoughts get destroyed there.

Be there.

Just be there.

Just be there.

There is nothing happening there.

Till the time there is nothing happening there,

You are on the right track.

He says you will drive the thought force deeper.

What does that mean?

By enquiry,

You will drive the thought force deeper till it reaches its source.

What is the source of this ego?

This I,

Source of the mind,

Source of everything.

What is the source?

The awareness,

The nothingness.

Everything comes from there,

Right?

That is the source.

So you will drive this deeper when you ask,

Who am I?

And you start looking for that I.

You're driving it deeper into the source,

Into the nothingness.

The I thought just keeps vanishing.

You go into the nothingness inside and then there you are in awareness.

You're just there.

That is the source.

Because from awareness comes,

From awareness,

Then it starts flowing outward.

What happens?

First is the mind.

Yeah,

Is the I thought.

And this only I thought.

You're reversing the process and you're going back to its source.

What is the source?

Awareness.

Awareness in motion is mind.

Mind at rest is awareness.

Here there is duality.

Here there is non-duality.

Duality means two.

Does it stop at two?

The moment there is the I and you then?

They.

He,

She,

They,

They,

They.

Diversity,

The separateness comes up.

Here there is non-duality.

Very clear?

You will drive this thought deeper till it reaches the source and merges therein.

It is then that you will have the response from within and find that you rest there,

Destroying all thoughts once and for all.

This I thought rises from me but I do not know the self.

All these are only mental concepts.

You are now identifying yourself with the wrong I which is the I thought.

This I thought rises and sinks whereas the true significance of I is beyond both.

There cannot be a break in your being.

You who slept are also now awake.

There is no unhappiness in your deep sleep whereas it exists now.

What is it that has happened now so that this difference is experienced?

There was no I thought in your sleep whereas it is present now.

The true I is not apparent and the false I is parading itself.

This false I is the obstacle to your right knowledge.

Find out from where this false I arises.

Then it will disappear.

You will then be only what you are,

That is absolute being.

Did you understand false I and true I here?

Who's the false I?

The ego.

The ego.

That is the mind,

No?

The questions,

The doubts,

The irritation,

The likes,

The dislikes.

All this is that false I.

It's parading itself continuously on and on and on and on and on.

Yeah?

Non-stop.

It doesn't stop.

And because it is non-stop parading itself,

You feel this is I.

Because of that continuity.

But really when you look within,

This falls off and then you are in that quietness,

That quietness,

That awareness.

There you see the oneness,

That oneness that flows everywhere and then there is no more separate self.

There is no more individual eyes.

The identification is broken.

Yeah?

So if there is a true I,

This is all I.

This is that real I.

Is this really an individual eye anymore?

Can I say in that I only I am there,

You are not a part of my I?

This one big I.

You see it?

Now do you understand the true significance of I is beyond.

It is beyond the wrong I.

It is beyond this I thought.

All these are only mental concepts and what does he mean by the unhappiness is there only when you're in the waking state?

What happens in the deep sleep state?

Are you unhappy?

Then again you wake up in the morning again,

You're back to your unhappiness.

What happened in this break?

So you thought this is continuous I know one big continuous I.

Where is the continuity?

Where is that the same I?

Oh I am unhappy since yesterday.

Really?

You're unhappy since yesterday is it the same I?

Mental concept.

Yes,

Like we drop the labels of objects.

We can go beyond and drop the label of I also now because the I which was unhappy yesterday was something else.

Yeah,

What was it?

The ego holding on to some feverishness.

It wanted something and it didn't get that.

That's why it was unhappy.

It's got nothing to do with I.

Yes,

I am this awareness,

This oneness.

And then you see how it loses its energy becomes feeble,

Weaker and weaker and falls off.

What is it that happened now so that this there is this difference is experienced?

There was no I thought in your sleep whereas it is present now.

What does it mean?

The ego was not there in your sleep.

Now it is there.

It comes back in the waking state.

Yeah?

The true I is not apparent and the false I is parading.

So who's parading?

Ego is parading.

Up and down and up and down and up and down only in the waking state not in the yeah the deep sleep state.

It's not there.

Yeah,

So we are making an attempt to go to that state in awareness.

Really,

What are we doing?

Yeah,

Just being in that awareness just being in that awareness and not feeding the ego.

Just come to that awareness.

Even if you come to the stage one good enough.

Yeah,

You're aware of the objects and you're aware of awareness.

Yes,

Drop the objects and now just be in awareness,

Awareness,

Awareness.

Just be good enough.

Even if you're not managing to come to oneness be in awareness.

Be aware of awareness.

That's great job done there.

Right,

Right there.

Yeah,

Right there.

The ego starts weakening.

Right there.

That's also sufficient.

Yeah,

But as you progress you will progress automatically onto the oneness.

I believe that oneness as much as possible it strengthens that feeling of oneness and weakens the feeling of a separate self a separate eye.

The separate eye needs to drop the separate self the identification needs to weaken and weaken.

Yeah.

That is how it will disappear the false eye will disappear and you will then be only what you are.

That is the absolute being.

How to do it?

I have not succeeded so far.

This is another Arjuna asking him.

Just doesn't get it.

Search for the source of the I thought.

That is all that one has to do the universe exists on account of the I thought if that ends there is an end to misery.

Also the false eye will end only when its source is sought.

Yeah.

Again people often ask how the mind is controlled.

I say to them show me the mind and then you will know what to do.

Find it.

Find find your mind.

And there's a Zen story also.

I think they reminded me there's a Zen story where this person goes to the Zen master and he says I want to get rid of my ego.

You help me.

So the Zen master says okay TK.

I'll help you get rid of the ego.

Don't worry in the.

Middle of the night you come to my kutti.

Yes,

And you bring your ego along.

I will wait with an axe and I'm going to kill it today.

He was like the most and must have gone cuckoo.

What does he mean bring my ego alone?

So the person still you know thought he's cuckoo,

But he still like he went in a master is calling me.

Yeah,

And when he went there the master asked did you find the ego?

So what do you mean by found the ego sit down find the ego tell me where is the ego and he sat down.

Okay,

I will find the ego close your eyes.

Tell me the moment you find it.

I'm going to hit the axe you tell me when you find him.

Okay.

Okay.

I'll show you my don't worry.

Don't worry about nothing will happen to you.

I only kill the ego.

Yeah,

He just sat and he surrendered and the story goes that he just said he said he said there is no ego.

There is no ego.

I cannot find it.

The master said just be there just be in silence.

You'll find the ego.

I cannot find the ego.

There is no ego.

There is no ego.

We got enlightened.

There is no ego.

Yeah,

It's a ghost.

It's a ghost.

Unnecessary it goes on because you you are the reason you have fed it.

Yeah,

Stop feeding it.

People often ask how the mind is controlled.

I say to them show me the mind and then you will know what to do.

The fact is that the mind is only a bundle of thoughts.

How can you extinguish it by the thought of doing so or by your desire?

Are you getting it?

You can't think against another thought.

It is one thought against another thought.

Doesn't make sense.

Your thoughts and desires are part and parcel of the mind.

The mind is simply fattened by new thoughts rising up.

Therefore,

It is foolish to attempt to kill the mind by means of the mind.

The only way of doing it is to find its source and hold on to it.

The mind will then fade away of its own accord.

Got it?

The source of the I is that awareness.

You just go into that and just be.

Yoga teaches Chitta Vritti Nirodha,

Control of the activities of the mind.

But I say Atma Vichara,

Self-enquiry.

This is the practical way.

Chitta Vritti Nirodha is brought about in sleep soon or by starvation.

As soon as the cause is withdrawn,

There is a recrudescence of thoughts.

Of what use is it then?

Means you're suppressing it by doing any of the yoga practices.

You're just suppressing your thought.

So the moment you remove the cause of whatever practice you are doing,

What will happen?

All the thoughts come back.

It's of no use.

What's the point?

Only 20-30 minutes the thoughts got suppressed.

Now they are back.

Very very clear.

It's no use.

You wasted 20 minutes.

Congratulations.

In the state of stupa,

There is peace and no misery.

But misery recurs when the stupa is removed.

So Nirodha or control is useless and cannot be of lasting benefit.

Yes,

It's not going to take away your misery.

Remember that.

How then can the benefit be made lasting?

It is by finding the cause of misery.

Misery is due to the perception of objects.

If they are not there,

There will be no contingent thoughts and so misery is wiped off.

To get over misery,

You have to find the cause of misery.

By suppressing thoughts,

Is that the right solution?

The right solution is you find the cause of misery and then you remove that cause.

What is the cause of your misery?

Your craving,

Your aversions,

Your chattering mind,

Your perception of objects,

Your desires and anger.

Okay,

All these all these really are because of what?

Ego.

So what is the root cause of my misery?

Ego.

Very honestly,

Look at your practice,

Whatever practice you're doing,

Whichever yoga practice,

Nirodha practice,

Pranayam practice,

Is that removing your ego?

Yes.

It is not removing your ego.

So then is it going to remove the misery?

That's all he is saying.

That's all he's saying that you figure out the cause of your misery and then you uproot that cause.

Simple.

How then can the benefit be made lasting?

It is by finding the cause of misery.

Misery is due to the perception of objects.

If they are not there,

There will be no contingent thoughts and so misery is wiped off.

How will objects cease to be is the next question.

The Shrutis or scriptures and the sages say that the objects are only meant till creations.

They have no substantive being.

Investigate the matter and ascertain the truth of the statement.

The result will be the conclusion that the objective world is in the subjective consciousness.

The absolute awareness is thus the only reality which permeates and also envelops the world.

Since there is no duality,

No thoughts will arise to disturb your peace.

This is the realisation of the absolute awareness.

The absolute awareness is eternal and so also is the realisation.

Are you getting it?

He's saying if you've not removed the cause of misery,

You're never going to get out of misery.

So the cause of my misery is?

Okay,

My own ego.

Where has my ego gotten all this from?

I like,

I don't like is the way I see or conceive this world,

Conceive people,

Situations and things and now I want them to be my way.

They are not my way.

Yeah,

And then I get into that tussle that bring up these thoughts and then I'm fighting with myself and you see where the drama has led to.

Is your practice getting rid of this drama?

If it is not getting rid of this drama,

Then you need to find the right practice which he's saying is not suppressing these causes of misery,

The objects,

The people,

The situations,

Not by suppressing them.

By you going to the source of this.

What is the source of these objects?

Awareness,

That consciousness.

I go to that awareness and now I really look at this nature of awareness.

What is it?

Now are you a little awake to go back over there?

What is the nature?

Calmness.

Some completeness.

Okay,

It's peaceful.

Yeah,

It's timeless.

It is flowing.

It's oneness.

Then I see it is everywhere.

Now it is in the same people who are the cause of my misery.

How can I know?

Say this is the cause of my misery.

Are you seeing this?

So this leads to like a competitiveness.

Now the misery when you look at the bigger picture is a very small part of it.

So it doesn't bother you anymore.

It's not there anymore.

It was not that person only that was the cause of my misery.

Me going into this ego and demanding something from this person was the cause of my misery.

When I withdrew from the mind and the ego and I settled into the reality of this consciousness,

This awareness.

Everything is one.

There is no I only.

Who is miserable?

Correct.

It is like a part of your body is hurting you.

You cannot think that your hand is hurting you or your mind is hurting you.

Your identity is with your body.

So like that this identification,

This individual identification starts breaking and then there's this oneness.

Now in this oneness that person who is causing the misery is there,

But the person to whom the misery was caused has died suddenly.

So you uprooted the misery by this person who was saying I am miserable.

You uprooted him only.

You don't have to do anything to this person.

What an amazing cure.

Abhyasa spiritual practice consists in withdrawal within the self every time you are disturbed by thought.

It is not concentration or destruction of the mind,

But withdrawal into the self instead of seeing the cause of misery here here.

I withdraw recognizing it is only my mind or ego holding on to him or her.

I withdraw into the source of who is suffering and then I go into that awareness and I recognize who this awareness,

Who its bodily is,

Its eternal.

It's all encompassing.

It's all pervading.

Oh there is this oneness.

Even that person is a part of this.

I am that person.

That person is I.

There is no individual I.

Who's suffering here?

There is no suffering.

Yeah,

That's how you uproot the misery uproot the misery again and again and again.

Why is concentration ineffective?

To ask the mind to kill the mind is like making the thief the policeman.

He will go with you and pretend to catch the thief,

But nothing will be gained.

So you must turn inward and see from where the mind arises and then it will cease to exist.

We've done this yesterday also.

In turning the mind inwards,

Are we not still employing the mind?

Of course we are employing the mind.

It is well known and admitted that only with the help of the mind can the mind be killed but instead of setting about seeing there is a mind and I want to kill it,

You begin to seek the source of the mind.

Yeah,

You don't go in in violent with the Kalwar axe.

I'm going to kill the mind.

That let the Zen master do.

Right now your ego does not take you as your Zen master.

Yeah,

So you have to do it kindly and how do you do it kindly?

Seek the source.

Seek the source of the mind and you will find the mind does not exist at all.

The mind turned outwards results in thoughts and objects.

Turn inwards,

It becomes itself.

The absolute awareness.

Very clear we've done this.

Now awareness flowing outwards is the mind.

Mind flowing inwards is the awareness.

Even so,

I do not understand I.

You say is the wrong I now.

How to eliminate the wrong I?

You need not eliminate the wrong I.

How can I eliminate itself?

Very nice,

No?

All that you need to do is find out its origin and abide there.

Your efforts can extend only thus far.

Then the beyond will take care of itself.

You are helpless there.

No effort can reach it.

Only the first part you have to make an effort.

Once you get to the awareness,

Then it just happens automatically.

If I'm always here and now,

Why do I not feel so?

That is it.

Who says it is not felt?

Does the real I say it or the false I examine it?

You will find it is the wrong I.

The wrong I is the obstruction.

It has to be removed in order that the true I may not be hidden.

The feeling that I have not realised is the obstruction to realisation.

Highlight this.

This is very important.

You have created a concept in your head.

I am not realised.

I am not awakened.

I am not enlightened.

I am not in the present moment.

That itself is the obstruction.

He says that each of us are enlightened only discovered by a veil of conditioning.

All you need to do is drop the conditioning and really look within.

You are.

This is the direct method.

You are.

Yes.

In fact,

It is already realised and there is nothing more to be realised.

Otherwise,

The realisation will be new.

If it has not existed so far,

It must take place here after.

What is born will also die.

If realisation is not eternal,

It is not worth having.

Therefore,

What we seek is not that which must happen afresh.

It is only that which is eternal but not now known due to obstructions.

It is that which we seek.

All that we need to do is remove the obstruction.

That which is eternal is not known to be so because of ignorance.

Ignorance is the obstruction.

Get over the ignorance and all will be well.

The ignorance is identical with the I-thought.

Find its source and it will vanish.

The I-thought is like a spirit which although not palpable,

Rises up simultaneously with the body,

Flourishes and disappears with it.

The body consciousness is the wrong I.

Give up this body consciousness.

It is done by seeking the source of the I.

The body does not say I am.

It is you who say I am the body.

Find out who this I is.

Seeking its source,

It will vanish.

What he means in the first paragraph is that you cannot search for that which you have never known.

What do you crave for?

Something you have experienced.

Correct.

You had triple dark chocolate ice cream and you loved it and the craving comes today again to have the same triple dark chocolate ice cream.

Yeah.

Because you have tasted it in the past,

That is why you have the craving today.

Do you agree that you have the thirst to get enlightened?

Yes.

You have a yearning to attain that supreme bliss,

That supreme permanent everlasting happiness.

You cannot crave for something that is not something you tasted or known before.

You have tasted it.

You know it.

It has been a part of you.

It is eternal.

It's not something new you have to manufacture or turn into.

That's what he's saying in the first paragraph.

Get it?

It is something that was there always.

It is there.

It is eternal.

It is only obstructed right now.

It's just obstructed by your own conditionings.

And your own thought that I have not reached there,

That itself is also one more conditioning because it's a label.

I am not there has come from some of the other scriptures,

Something you have read,

Something somebody told you.

It's not your experience.

Are you seeing this?

What was your experience?

You could get to the awareness like that.

Yes,

And most of you can also stay there.

Yeah,

Some of you slip back.

You can get there again.

That is your true experience.

You just be with their experience.

Now drop the conditioning.

All this conditioning is an obstruction.

It is not letting you be with the true experience.

Do you see what he's saying?

You be with your experience.

You cannot crave for something that which you have not tasted.

If realisation is not eternal,

It is not worth having.

Means what?

Means it is eternal.

What is the meaning of eternal?

It was there,

It is there and it will be there.

What do you think?

I will get there.

Means I was not there.

I am not there now,

But I will get there.

What is self-realisation?

Is it eternal?

And that which will come will also go on then because everything is changing.

Everything is impermanent.

Yes.

It was always there.

It was just obstructed by my labelling,

By my conditioning,

By what I learnt,

What I picked up.

By names and forms.

By red colour,

Blue colour.

I am not looking at the beautiful white light.

Are you seeing this?

All the labels were given to me from outside.

That was all conditioning.

It is eternal.

You are already that.

You are awareness.

So drop this.

Drop this.

This is very clear?

Yes.

Copyright © 2020 Mooji Media Ltd.

All Rights Reserved.

Reviews

🙏🏼