Self-Inquiry 18 - Self-Enquiry Practice

Listen to Ektaji talk about Ramana Maharshi's self-inquiry teachings. These teachings are aimed at the experiential understanding of the true nature of the self and that consciousness is the only existing reality.

Transcript

Salaam.

Salaam.

Salaam.

Salaam.

Salaam.

Salaam.

So what will be the result of doing that?

As you go on you will find that your attitude towards people,

Events and objects gradually changes.

Your actions will tend to follow your meditations of their own accord.

So like you practice non-reaction and meditation that becomes such a habit pattern.

Automatically in life you become non-reactive.

In meditation you practice,

The practice in the meditation itself is of compassion,

Of love,

That habit pattern of doing it for so many days.

Makes it your impression that you carry it back home and then there you are in the same state.

In meditation you are in a state of quiet mind that becomes a strong impression.

That quiet mind you take back with you.

You get it?

You understood the constant flow and then that changes your habit pattern.

For this you have to really experience it right now.

It's just the second day so you've not practiced enough to be there.

But you start practicing you can get there.

You keep observing,

You keep being in the awareness,

Be established there and not ready to budge.

That's how you hold on to it.

You don't budge from there.

Come what may,

I don't budge from here.

You then let that peace flow and it flows all around.

It just envelops you.

And you let it envelope you.

And then even a silly thought comes up.

You know it's like an empty shell because now this thought does not have the power on me that it had before.

I am established in that awareness so that thought does not bother you anymore and it goes away.

The things that bothered you earlier they come up because of the habit pattern because of what you have sown.

The seed will sprout no?

And it goes away.

Again another one comes it goes away.

This coming and going,

Coming and going.

Starts reducing,

Reducing,

Reducing and you notice a personality change.

Not only you notice people around you start saying you've changed.

Yeah so if meditation does not bring about a personality change it's not meditation.

It's not working for you.

If meditation brings about a personality change provided you're practicing then only is it the right meditation.

Do you get it?

It's of no use if it does not reflect in your personality.

Yeah.

Your actions will tend to follow your meditations of their own accord.

Then you do not agree with the yogis.

Answer?

A man should surrender the personal selfishness which binds him to this world.

Giving up the false self is the true renunciation.

Yeah he could not be more direct than this.

A man should surrender what?

Personal selfishness which binds him to the world.

Giving up the false self is the true renunciation.

How is it possible to become selfless while leading a life of worldly activity?

There is no conflict between work and wisdom.

Do you mean that one can continue all the old activities in one's profession for instance and at the same time get enlightenment?

Why not?

But in that case one will not think that it is the old personality which is doing the work because one's consciousness will gradually become transferred until it is centered in that which is beyond the little self.

Yeah.

So before enlightenment I cut wood and I carried water.

After enlightenment I cut wood and I carried water.

You do the same thing.

Just you will know that it is not the same personality.

You can get enlightened.

So if you have this fake conditioning that oh I cannot get enlightened it will not happen to me.

It is some mythical out of the world magical happening extraordinary.

Enlightenment is not extraordinary.

There's nothing extraordinary about enlightenment.

Yeah,

It is more ordinary than extra.

Very very very ordinary.

In fact you're right there all the time you don't have to go anywhere to get enlightened.

You're right there.

It's just a matter of removing the wrong conditioning.

The moment the curtain is left is lifted all the conditionings are lifted you will notice oh I was right there.

I was right there.

There is no difference.

Yeah,

So you don't have to go anywhere.

Yeah.

If a person is engaged in work there will be little time left for him to meditate.

Setting apart time for meditation is only for the merest spiritual novices.

What is the meaning of a novice?

Beginner.

A beginner.

It's only for the beginners.

Yes,

What is only for the beginners?

Sitting every day for one hour,

Two hours,

Whatever 20 minutes is only for beginners.

A man who is advancing will begin to enjoy the deeper beatitude whether he is at work or not.

While his hands are in society he keeps his head cool in solitude.

Yeah,

He's constantly in the state of meditation all the time.

All the time.

He does not need to set time aside.

So they're enjoying the beatitude,

The beauty basically and that beauty is there because they are so established in that awareness in that quiet mind.

They've maintained it with eyes open so they don't need to really sit.

They have reached that stage where constantly with eyes open they are there.

Yeah.

Then you do not teach the way of yoga.

That's the question.

Answer.

The yogi tries to drive his mind to the goal as a coward drives a bull with a stick.

You do hike hike hike hike hike hike hike hike hike.

That's what a yogi is doing he's saying.

But on this path means of self-inquiry the seeker coaxes the bull by handing out a handful of grass.

Not hike hike hike hike hike but just giving the grass and bringing the bull.

Who's the bull?

The ego.

And what is the grass here?

The effort that I have to make.

What is the effort you're doing?

The turning around.

The who am I question or am I aware.

The way you make it turn around.

You're using the grass and that grass is turning around.

Got it?

Yeah there is no hike hike hike hike hike hike.

In nice ways I'm not describing it.

How is that done?

You have to ask yourself the question who am I?

This investigation will lead in the end to the discovery of something within you which is behind the mind.

Solve that great problem and you will solve all other problems.

You already know this.

Seeking the eye there is nothing to be seen.

Because you are accustomed to identify yourself with the body and sight with the eyes.

Therefore you say you do not see anything.

What is there to be seen?

Who is to see?

How to see?

There is only one consciousness which manifesting as I thought identifies itself with the body,

Projects itself through the eyes and sees the objects around.

The individual is limited in the waking state and expects to see something different.

The evidence of his senses will be the seal of authority.

But he will not admit that the seer,

The seen and seeing are all manifestations of the same consciousness,

Namely I I.

Contemplation helps one to overcome the illusion that the absolute awareness must be visual.

In truth there is nothing visual.

How do you feel the I now?

Do you hold a mirror before you to know your own being?

The awareness is the I.

Realize it and that is the truth.

So in this we have already discussed all of this how the same awareness you're noticing becomes the mind.

And actually now you started noticing that it's the same awareness pervading everywhere.

All the objects are part of this awareness.

Even me seeing that object,

That perceiving is also awareness.

Knowing is also awareness.

Object is also awareness.

Everything is awareness.

Everything is consciousness.

At this level he called it I I.

Yeah,

And you see it as all one.

This awareness,

This consciousness that which you're seeing is all pervading is limitless.

This.

You're experiencing it in the open-eyed waking state.

Is it there in your dreaming state?

Is it there in your deep sleep state?

It's something that you know that is there everywhere throughout the states.

Because you have a way of seeing with open eyes.

It's very difficult for you to first at first see this awareness and everything you have a different way of seeing.

But now after you started seeing it everywhere hasn't the way you're seeing things changed.

Yeah,

First you just saw them as objects and this is I this is also an object you had duality.

But now do you see the non-duality because you can see it in a different light that this awareness is all pervading.

The individual is limited in the waking state and expects to see something different.

The evidence of his senses will be the seal of authority,

But he does not admit that the seer seen and the seeing are all the same.

But now do you understand the meaning of seer seen and the same being the same?

It's all one in your experience not intellectual understanding everybody.

Yeah,

The way you saw this awareness being a part of everything.

Oh there is no difference.

I really don't know the object.

I only know my perception of the object.

So the seer the process of seeing and the seen are awareness and one and the same.

Oh,

Till now this was only philosophy.

But now it is my reality.

That's how the tree and Jaya were the same the seer and that which is seen and the process of seeing were the same.

Complete awareness.

This is what he called as I I.

Yeah,

When you come to the stage of seeing everything as the same.

Then slowly you will go higher.

The knower the knowing and the object that is known is the same.

Yeah.

Go higher and higher slowly it will evolve slowly you it will evolve and you will come to a part where nothing is different.

We are all one.

So there is no doer.

There is no experiencer.

It is all one phenomena.

It is all happening.

There is no doing and each individual is like a little ripple in that water.

That's it.

Initially every ripples feels that I am different and this is that moment where that ripple realizes.

No,

I am not different from the water.

I am the water.

I am not the ripple.

This is the true realization of I am not the body.

I am not the mind till now.

It was only intellectual for you.

Now that you have experienced this awareness everywhere this understanding sets in.

Oh,

Yeah,

I am not this body.

I'm not this mind.

So this this whole ocean is who I am and I am the same ocean that you are and you are and you are and you are and that's where you see the oneness.

And that individual separate self dies forever.

It completely dies in you.

There is no more a separate self and individual self at all.

Yeah,

And then like I was saying the other night you're walking talking living you're doing earlier activities,

But it is as if you are asleep.

What does that mean?

Who is asleep?

That doer this experiencer all that has gone to sleep.

But you're still in action.

Everything is happening,

But that I has died.

If you continue this practice,

It takes you to another level of blossoming.

If you drop out you go back to zero.

Mine is actually you go back to negative marking.

Yes,

So don't drop out.

It's a very beautiful practice to continue moment to moment moment to moment while you are doing your activities be here be inside or least turned inside.

You understood the last paragraph contemplation helps one to overcome the illusion that the self must be visual.

Yeah,

Ensure there is nothing visual.

How do you feel the I now?

Is it visual your eyes visual?

No,

It's not a visual.

Yeah,

So get over these things that it has to be visual.

I have to see some light and then I see the eye but it's never happening.

You're just chasing after a cloud which is not even there and you think this cloud is something and you keep running.

It's not there.

You can't hold on to a cloud.

Can you never be able to hold on to it doesn't exist.

This poetic license and people use poetry to express something the light of awareness is shining and then you take it literally you don't understand poetry you see this.

This whole thing got manipulated and became very complicated.

It's very simple.

It's a shortcut streak method.

Yeah,

Who am I look within.

I like that sentence.

Do you hold a mirror before you to know your own being?

The awareness is the I realize it and that is the truth.

So here he means that that truth where I see that awareness all around in everyone.

Yes,

That is the highest.

It's not your individual little ego saying I it's not that one.

On inquiry into the origin of thoughts there is a perception of I but it does not satisfy me quite right.

The perception of I is associated with the form maybe the body there should be nothing associated with the pure absolute awareness.

The absolute awareness is the unassociated pure reality in whose light the body and the ego shine.

On stilling all thoughts the pure consciousness remains just on waking from sleep and before becoming aware of the world there is the pure I I hold on to it without sleeping or without allowing thoughts to possess you.

If that is held firm it does not matter even if the world is seen the seer remains unaffected by the phenomena.

What is he talking about?

Just on waking from sleep and before becoming aware of the world.

I'll add three words in the morning.

There is a moment before you are totally awake.

Yeah,

But you're not asleep and that moment in the morning of just waking up in that moment.

That is the moment he says you will find the pure I I.

You have an experience of this every morning when you wake up before thought has possessed you before you have become totally awake and you're not even asleep just that moment.

It's a few seconds same thing was described in japaji sahib as madhyagal.

Yeah,

But they're in between in between the waking and the sleeping state.

When you just wake up in the morning that moment you get the glimpse of this I I.

Yeah,

Why tell me why logically now put intellect in because you sleep you went into the other like you are no longer perfect.

Yes,

And then so that that that make up like that minute that second when you get that awareness that you're coming out of that.

Yeah,

That's the time.

Yes,

I has not come up yet in that few seconds.

You have just come out of the deep sleep,

But you're still not awake fully.

So the I has not taken the ego has not taken charge or not taken control in that little interval that one second few seconds or however long it lasts there is this I I that you can experience.

So homework for tomorrow morning.

Now be aware when you get out before sleeping you remind yourself I have to do this in the morning.

So it's like a reminder mental note that you are leaving for yourself.

It's a body clock.

It will happen automatically just before sleeping you tell yourself tonight that in the morning just when I'm waking up just arising from that quiet deep sleep state.

I will become aware.

Yeah,

Just recognize that that's a very beautiful delicate state.

Then you write to me.

Did you become aware if you fail tomorrow morning doesn't matter again you try tomorrow night remind yourself.

I will get up and when I get up just before ego takes control.

I will become aware and notice this.

Take care.

Obviously,

You've not practiced it so it might take a few nights of practice,

But for some people who practice it in japaji saheb and all when we've done it before then it might be something you might be able to get quickly enough.

You're making an active effort to be in that state even now your CPMS about to get up.

Yeah,

It is there automatically.

No,

No,

No.

Yes,

It is actually there automatically.

If you notice one thing Bhavan just said it,

But he didn't realize that he said the right thing.

Yeah,

He knows,

But he doesn't know that he knows he said when I go to sleep,

I go back into that awareness and in the morning when I'm coming out of the deep sleep,

I'm coming out of the awareness.

It is exactly like that.

You are coming out of it and that is the moment little bit of Jagrati has happened and you are maintaining that state for a few many seconds if at all before the eye takes control.

So it's a natural state you go into every night.

Every night it's happening to you.

Yeah,

So to experience it naturally without making an effort is your chance in the morning right now.

You have to make an effort because you're a beginner.

You have to still keep turning turning turning.

Yeah,

This is something which every night happens to you.

You're just going to wake up to that which oh was there.

I didn't know.

But I was just not aware of it.

I just got into the control of the eye and the big identity came up that I am this father or mother or this person and I have to take charge of the day and you go.

Okay.

Okay,

So the second paragraph of that same answer.

What is the ego enquire the body is insentient and cannot see I the self is pure consciousness and non dual.

It cannot say I.

No one says I in sleep.

What is ego then it is something intermediate between the inert body and the self.

It has no look to stand.

I if sought for it vanishes like a host.

At night a man may imagine that there is a ghost by his side because of the play of shadows.

If he looks closely he discovers that the ghost is not really there and what he imagined to be a ghost was merely a tree or a post.

If he does not look closely the ghost may terrify him.

All that is required is to look closely and the coast vanishes.

The coast was never there.

So also with the ego.

It is an intangible link between the body and pure consciousness.

It is not real.

So long as one does not look closely at it,

It continues to give trouble.

But when one looks for it,

It is found not to exist.

Yeah,

The ego does not exist.

The body cannot see I.

Very clear?

Awareness cannot say I.

What is in the middle?

The knot.

You remember the knot?

The ego.

Yeah,

The jada granthi.

Remember we did it yesterday.

That is in between the two.

So every time there is a thought,

Where did it come from?

Ego.

Every time there is a question,

Where did it come from?

Ego.

Can awareness ask the question?

Are you very very clear now?

You have to inquire within.

Who is this ego?

Where is it?

Let me look for it.

Can you find it?

Look.

Now that you look within,

Do you find it?

It's like a host.

When you look for it,

It is not there.

When you don't look for it,

It plays ghost ghost with you.

Scares you.

Yeah,

There's one more story after this about it.

There is another story which illustrates this.

In Hindu marriage functions,

The feasts often continue for five or six days.

On one of these occasions,

A stranger was mistaken for the best man by the bride's party.

And they therefore treated him with special regard.

Seeing him treated with special regard by the bride's party,

The bridegroom's party considered him to be some man of importance related to the bride's party.

And therefore,

They too showed him special respect.

The stranger had altogether a happy time of it.

He was also all along aware of the real situation.

On one occasion,

The groom's party wanted to refer to him on some point and so they asked the bride's party about him.

Immediately he sent to trouble and made himself scarce.

Disappeared.

Yeah,

He disappeared.

So it is with the ego.

If looked for,

It disappears.

If not,

It continues to give trouble.

You see that?

You check all these thoughts,

All these doubts,

All these questions,

All these irritations,

All these craving,

All this is ego.

Every thought in your mind is coming up from the ego.

If you are in a state of no mind,

You are in egolessness.

Do you get it?

If you're continuously talking,

Talking,

Talking,

It is the ego.

You're not looking at him.

You're not inquiring.

Then he's going to play havoc like this and have a happy time.

Yes,

He's having a happy time.

You recognize this again and again.

Just turn towards the awareness.

It cuts off.

Everything cuts off.

Yeah,

And if the ego bothers you a lot,

Look,

Where are you?

Where is this ego?

Who's asking this question?

Who's irritated?

Who wants this answer?

Who's craving?

Who's averse?

Ask.

So who are you asking this question?

Who is I?

I actually is a fake ego which disappears basically when you look for it.

Correct.

Did you get this?

When you say who am I?

You're questioning that ego.

Continuously that ego is bothering you with I this,

I that,

I don't like this,

I want this,

I am this,

I'm not this.

Now my body is paining,

This is happening,

That is happening,

Why is this not happening?

All this is ego.

Immediately you ask who is all this happening to me?

Who is I?

So who are you questioning?

Ego.

The moment you look for him what happens?

He just disappears.

Are you getting it?

That is the real process.

That is the gist of this process.

You look for him,

He vanishes.

You look for him,

He vanishes.

That is why the moment you really sincerely look inwards,

He's gone.

That is the way to cut off these unnecessary thoughts that bother you.

Very clear?

If I try to make the who am I inquiry,

I fall into sleep.

What should I do?

This is a question for the sleepy heads.

Yeah,

For asked by the sleepy heads.

Persist in the inquiry throughout your waking hours,

That would be quite enough.

If you keep on making the inquiry till you fall asleep,

The inquiry will go on during sleep also.

Take up the inquiry again as soon as you wake up.

Simple.

Don't make it too complicated.

Just continue,

Continue as much as you can.

You fall asleep again,

You wake up,

You continue.

Yeah.

Just continue the inquiry.

Don't come up with any excuse whatsoever.

How can I get peace?

I do not seem to obtain it through vichara.

Vichara here is investigation.

Peace is your natural state.

It is the mind that obstructs the natural state.

If you do not experience peace,

It means that your vichara or investigation has been made only in the mind.

Investigate what the mind is and it will disappear.

There is no such thing as mind apart from thought.

Nevertheless,

Because of the emergence of thought,

You surmise something from which it starts and term that the mind.

When you probe to see what it is,

You find there is really no such thing as mind.

When the mind has thus vanished,

You realize eternal peace.

Get it?

It is always that because the mind has come up,

The peace is lost.

That is why you are not experiencing peace because you have given too much energy to the mind.

You have fed the mind a lot.

Yeah.

So inquire what is this?

Who is this inside?

Whatever that question is,

Turn it into the question of who am I?

Who is asking?

Who wants to know?

Who is there?

Yes,

The mind will cut off.

Very,

Very clear.

There is no other way to find this peace.

Whatever technique you do,

Whatever else you do,

You will still be using the mind to quieten the mind.

Will that work?

Not work.

Clear?

Yes.

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