Self Inquiry 17- Self Enquiry Practice

Listen to Ektaji talk about Ramana Maharshi's self-inquiry teachings. These teachings are aimed at the experiential understanding of the true nature of the self and that consciousness is the only existing reality.

Transcript

Salaam.

Salaam.

Salaam.

Salaam.

Salaam.

You say one can realize the absolute awareness by a search for it.

What is the character of this search?

You are the mind or think that you are the mind.

The mind is nothing but thoughts.

Now behind every particular thought there is a general thought which is the I that is yourself.

Let us call this I the first thought.

Stick to this I thought and question it to find out what it is.

When this question takes strong hold on you,

You cannot think of other thoughts.

Whatever your mind is thinking these are thoughts.

Thought is equal to mind,

Mind is equal to thought.

All you do is what is this thought?

Again same question who am I because in your thought there will be an I or mine or he said this to me or that happened or my child didn't listen to me.

Who wants the child to listen?

It's basically framing a question to turn back in.

You find a way to question that I thought and turn back in.

That's all that there is.

You stick to that.

It is the first thought that came up about your child.

My child is not listening to me.

He's playing with video games.

Who wants the child to not play with video games?

You find this I.

You stick to that first I and come back in.

When I do this and cling to myself that is the I thought.

Other thoughts come and go but I say to myself who am I and there is no answer forthcoming.

Is this your experience too?

Okay.

To be in this condition is the practice.

Is it so?

This is a mistake that people often make.

What happens when you make a serious quest for the absolute awareness is that the I thought disappears and something else from the depths takes hold of you and that is not the I which commends the quest.

Did you get it?

He's saying I am just stuck in the question who am I and nothing is happening.

Yeah again I'm asking who am I and nothing is happening.

So he's saying that you don't stay with this I this mind you turn inwards as if you have this flashlight in your hand and you're searching inwards.

You will notice something arise.

Yes,

And that is the awareness where you go and there is no talking there.

There is no not even this answer.

There is nothing the moment you say there is nothing.

Where are you?

You're back out.

Awareness cannot speak.

You're not in awareness.

The moment you say there is nothing where are you?

You're out.

Are you getting this?

You stay there.

Something else has arisen there.

Just be there.

You are so used to talking that you come back out.

Don't talk.

Stop the self-talk.

You will be able to stay there and experience that something else that arises from the depths.

Is that clear?

Yeah,

Then you can go into the deeper stages of the experience right now.

You're not able to go because you immediately start talking to yourself about it.

Yeah,

Just let that which is arising arise and you sink into it.

You just go into it.

You will see your sinking into something.

You let it arise and you go into the depth.

Yeah.

What is this something else?

That is the real absolute awareness.

The import of I.

It is not the ego.

It is the supreme being itself.

See you yourself use this word some supreme divinity,

Some supreme being.

Yeah,

It's good that you first said it and it has come later in the book.

Yeah,

It's more like something is confirming your experience.

But you have often said that one must reject other thoughts when one begins the quest but the thoughts are endless.

If one thought is rejected,

Another comes and there seems to be no end at all.

Do you experience that?

Thoughts are coming.

Thoughts are coming.

Thoughts are coming.

You're going in again.

One thought is taking over again.

You're going in.

Yes,

It's happening.

Okay.

Now listen what he says.

I do not say you must go on rejecting thoughts.

Yeah.

Cling to yourself.

That is to the I thought.

What is that?

Who am I?

Who am I?

You cling to that.

Your problem is you want to cling to the thought of your son,

Your daughter,

Your school bus,

Dad,

This,

Your money,

Your office,

Your boss,

Your wife,

Your husband.

You want to cling to that and then you want to cling to that and you want this also.

Is it possible?

This you have to let go and cling to.

Who am I?

Here.

Yeah.

To that I.

To that I and stay here.

Yeah.

When your interest keeps you to that single idea,

Other thoughts will automatically get rejected and they will vanish.

Got it?

They will automatically get rejected.

You don't have to make the effort.

So you don't have to reject every single thought.

That is a lot of work.

All you do is you turn inwards and cling to who am I?

Yeah.

Start the quest inwards.

These will get dropped automatically.

We already discussed this yesterday.

And so rejection of thoughts is not necessary.

He says no.

It may be necessary for a time or for some.

Means some people might need it.

It depends on how you are,

How much you are lost in external thoughts.

Yeah.

For some people,

Rejecting might be required.

For some people to start with it might be required.

For some people,

Boof,

They are inside.

Only you know where you are,

Right?

So you will have to experiment.

You experiment on yourself and you arrive at what is right for you.

Yeah.

It may be necessary for a time or for some.

You fancy that there is no end if one goes on rejecting every thought when it rises.

It is not true.

There is an end.

If you are vigilant,

Big if.

Yeah.

If you are vigilant and make a stern effort to reject every thought when it rises,

You will soon find that you are going deeper and deeper into your own inner self.

Yeah.

As some of us are beginners,

We have to make this effort of rejecting all the nonsense stuff that I was interested in self-talk and go and repeating in my head because I have this habit of clinging to it.

Yeah.

So I reject.

Let go.

Right now I don't have to think about this.

Right now this is not important.

I've already prepared an Excel sheet.

Thank you.

Stay away.

I don't need to think about you.

You might have to do a few cleaning up the room vacuuming and then just be and then one little thought again will come.

Yeah.

And then again just be and after a while,

Even if a thought comes,

It just hovers and goes away.

You will gain the ability to stay in awareness.

Notice it come and go without getting distracted.

Did it happen at least once this part?

So you did it once at least.

That's good.

You can do it again where you just are cleaning up,

Cleaning up,

Rejecting.

You're there and then you come to a stage when they are just strangers walking past.

They don't distract me.

Yeah.

Yes.

Even if it was a thought of the son of the spouse of the boss of the job of the money,

It was it just became a passing.

But again,

Please highlight the vigilant and the stern effort that is the biggest if if you don't do that,

You are not getting there.

Forget about it.

You cannot expect that I will get instant results that this has to happen automatically because I read this page today.

No,

It's not happening like that.

Clear.

So if you are vigilant and make a stern effort to reject every thought when it rises,

You will soon find that you are going deeper and deeper into your own inner self.

At that level,

It is not necessary to make an effort to reject thought.

So you will come to that point,

But if you are not at that point yet,

You start with a little bit of rejecting and just being just being just being you'll come to that point where I told you they will just be strangers.

They are just passing by.

Clear.

Then it is possible to be without effort without strain.

Not only that,

It is impossible for you to make an effort beyond a certain extent.

Yes,

Now it has become natural.

Yeah,

Because you put the effort initially and it becomes natural.

But if you miss the effort initially,

It will never become natural.

I want to be further enlightened.

Should I try to make no effort at all?

Here it is impossible for you to be without effort.

I'll read that again.

Please mark it.

Here it is impossible for you to be without effort.

When you go deeper,

It is impossible for you to make any effort.

Got it.

It's different at the when you are at the top level of the ocean,

There are waves and you want to go scuba diving.

You will have to make that effort to now let go sink in start breathing.

You have to make that effort that you know,

I'm breathing in properly and I can't maintain sustain myself under the water.

So I make that effort once I'm below the water.

Now I'm below.

Now no effort is required.

The current of the water itself will pull me in the correct direction and I'll keep going.

Yes,

So the effort is only at the initial part where I'm lost in this world of duality of people,

Situations and things and my mind is lost in thoughts and perceptions,

Ideas.

Yes again and again I move in effort is only in turning inwards.

Once I've turned inwards and once I've sunk into that awareness now I have to let go of the effort and sink.

How do you sink into the water?

Only when you let go,

No?

You cannot sink if you don't let go.

You'll tend to start swimming.

You don't have to swim here.

This is another world.

Here you have to dive in.

So the effort is only initial of moving inwards and once you're in now let go and rest.

You'll see that now the awareness does not last for a few glimpses.

It lasts longer because you've learned to rest in it,

To just be in it.

You got what I'm saying?

You have to learn to rest there,

Rest there.

That is home.

That is where the mind comes and rests and then again it goes out into the world as its activity,

Things mix and excel sheet worries about this person,

Worries about that person who recognizes what am I doing?

Cut it out,

Comes back in.

Now you rest again.

Now you sink,

Now you sink,

Now you sink.

The sinking will help you stay there longer.

It won't be a glimpse anymore.

Are you getting it?

Yeah?

This is your key of how to stay there longer and not have just one one second.

Has it become longer already?

Yes?

You stay there.

Now you stay there.

Fantastic.

For those it's not become longer,

Wouldn't shake your head.

You have to stay there.

Let go.

Let go of thought.

Let go of emotion.

Let go of perception.

Then only you can stay there.

Don't try to analyze it.

The moment I analyze it,

I am back out.

I am saying this.

Just stay there.

It's a beautiful place to be and then you will notice that you can stay there even while talking.

That will happen a little later but even while speaking you can be there.

Doing all your actions from there.

They will start happening spontaneously.

You won't have to do anymore.

Yeah but that's a later stage.

We'll get there when we get there.

Right now you just stay.

Make the practice of staying there.

If the mind becomes introverted through enquiry into the source of Ahamriti,

The vasanas become extinct.

You understand what he's saying?

Introverted means it's inside.

It's an awareness.

You are in awareness.

You're established there.

Just resting there.

That is the meaning of introverted.

Automatically vasanas start becoming extinct.

What are vasanas again?

Impressions,

Mental tendencies,

Examples?

Impurities,

Example?

Anger,

Hatred,

Jealousy?

Yeah yeah yeah.

All these traits that take me out into the world.

All these things that keep my attention outside.

These are just larger words.

Even just simple likes and dislikes take you out.

These are vasanas.

Very clear what is vasana?

This starts becoming extinct the more you rest in the awareness.

The more you stay,

Unnecessary thoughts.

Why are you thinking about what your son is doing or what you did last week and was wrong?

It's just stress.

There is no need for inner self-talk.

You're getting it no?

It's just unnecessary inner chit chat.

That is vasana,

Mental tendency.

Very very clear?

Yeah.

So these become extinct just by being established in awareness.

So if the mind becomes introverted through inquiry into the source of ahamdritti.

Ahamdritti is the I thought.

The vasanas become extinct.

The light of the absolute awareness falls on the vasanas and produces the phenomena of reflection we call the mind.

Please don't start imagining there's a light inside.

Just these poetic words of the sages confuse people and they started imagining there has to be a white light now which shines and then that becomes the mind.

It's as simple as your experience.

You experience that that awareness only flows out and is the mind and that mind only turns in and is the awareness.

Simple.

That has been put in these words.

Got it?

Please don't expect any light to shine.

There's no light there.

It falls on the vasanas and produces the phenomena of reflection we call the mind.

Thus when the vasanas become extinct the mind also disappears.

So basically when you work on your habitual tendencies not reacting to these thoughts that come up from your previous hidden habitual patterns the vasanas become the thoughts also stop arising.

Yeah for example she gave you an example.

She started practicing observing sensations and not reacting and because she was not reacting in her meditation when actually the child started shouting and screaming at her at home she stopped reacting because that's what had become a habit pattern a new habit pattern.

So that vasana of anger had become extinct.

Got it?

We have an example right here that she shared about her life.

So that's how it goes away.

Thus when the vasanas become extinct the mind also disappears.

Being absorbed into the light of the one reality the heart.

Again this is poetry there is no light there.

Basically it gets absorbed into the awareness.

We read earlier the first line I read from this book was that awareness is also called the heart is also called the self with the capital S.

You remember that?

It's also called the guru it's also called the god.

It's all just one absolute awareness.

This is the sum and substance of all that an aspirant needs to know.

What is imperatively required of him is an earnest and one-pointed inquiry into the source of the aham vritti.

Very clear this is all that you need to know.

I have vasanas.

The vasanas keep bringing up these thoughts again and again.

The way to cut out these thoughts is simply to again and again go inwards and rest in the awareness.

The more I rest in the awareness the more these I thoughts will keep getting cut off.

Again and again I am here I'm cutting off.

Every time I move in I cut off.

Regard this as a cutting off taking a sword and cutting it off that's that's what it does.

It weakens and weakens and weakens that vasana and those thoughts stop coming up and bothering you.

How should a beginner start this practice?

The mind will subside only by means of the inquiry who am I?

The thought who am I?

Destroying all other thoughts will itself finally be destroyed like the stick used for stirring the funeral pyre.

If other thoughts rise one should without attempting to complete them inquire to whom do they rise.

This is beautiful no yeah and thought arose in your mind oh I like the pink dress don't feel it he's saying without continuing any more on that thought immediately ask yourself to whom did this thought arise you turn in.

Yeah don't feed that you understood no he's telling you to cut the self-talk cut it out and turn in cut it out and turn in.

What does it matter however many thoughts rise at the very moment that each thought rises if one vigilantly inquires to whom did this arise it will be known to me.

If one then inquires who am I the mind will turn back to its source the absolute awareness and the thought which has risen will also subside by repeatedly practicing thus the power of the mind to abide in its source increases.

And you're seeing no already now by Sunday you're in it longer than you were in it on Friday yeah so the power of abiding abiding means staying over there the power of abiding in it has increased from Friday to Sunday yeah so the more you keep doing this the power of staying there longer increases in you.

Yeah.

Although tendencies towards sense objects vishaya vasanas which have been recurring down the ages rise in countless numbers like the waves of the ocean they will all perish as meditation on one's nature becomes more and more intense.

Yeah so basically all the vasanas or mental tendencies will slowly slowly get wiped away the more you practice.

Without giving room even to the doubting thought is it possible to destroy all these tendencies or vasanas and to remain as self alone or absolute awareness alone.

One should persistently cling fast to self-attention.

Yeah don't give any heed to the doubts that arise in your mind he's saying the more you give heed to the doubts the weaker your practice will become and you will not be able to progress.

Yes so if you really want to progress don't pay any heed to doubt I don't care about this doubt it arose it went I don't care yeah you come back to the awareness the less food you give to doubt the quicker it will wither and die.

So this last thing is very important one should persistently cling fast to self-attention.

Whenever Ramana was asked can you give your teaching in one word he said attention.

Yeah it's attention in words.

Yeah teaching in one word just attention.

As long as there are tendencies towards sense objects in the mind the inquiry who am I is necessary.

As and when thoughts rise one should annihilate all of them through inquiry then and there in their very place of origin.

Not attending to what is other or Anya is non-attachment Vairagya or desirelessness Neeras not leaving self is knowledge or Jnana.

In truth these two desirelessness and Jnana or knowledge are one and the same.

Not attending to what is other other is Anya is non-attachment or Vairagya or another word you know is dispassion.

So not attending to the other is called dispassion what is other here all these thoughts that are coming up all these unnecessary thoughts did this happen will this happen what will happen blah blah blah this is Anya.

Not attending to this is called Vairagya,

Dispassion or detachment what is it here non-attachment.

Clear this part is very clear then or it is called Neeras desirelessness.

Not leaving the absolute awareness is knowledge or Jnana.

Not leaving this at all all the time being inside in awareness staying there itself is called knowledge or Jnana.

In truth these two desirelessness and knowledge means Neeras and Jnana or dispassion and Jnana are one and the same.

You need dispassion to look away from the thoughts that are bothering you and you need your own interest in yourself that jnana that knowledge of being in absolute awareness.

These two are required and actually they are the same that which takes me away from here helps me establish here or if I have lots of interest here this will automatically take me away from here.

Dispassion is a very natural thing that develops on this path because you don't know anything better you start thinking it as disinterest other people in the family say you're not interested anymore in me or not interested in what we used to do together.

So it seems like disinterest but it is just a natural maturity of wearing of a growing out of you grow out of your old jeans.

That's it you don't feel like wearing them anymore you don't feel like wearing those clothes anymore.

It's a very natural growth you can't say your dolls think that you're selfish you don't play with your dolls anymore.

You've just grown up you've grown out of your dolls yeah it's silly to even think like that you just mature.

It's progress on the path you see it written right here you become near us.

Yes that is jnana and those who don't have it are jnana's.

And it's a very natural growing up that happens here be with it.

Yeah desirelessness is another thing that sets in be with it it's beautiful very few rare people have that kind of a diamond of desirelessness.

Yeah very few people have it.

Those who have desire are begging for the diamond but those who have desirelessness have that diamond.

It's amazing yeah it's really contrary you feel that how I'm desireless and I have the diamond.

It is the diamond of desirelessness.

You're very lucky if you have it.

I think it's just moving from the joy of temporary joy to permanent joy.

Correct.

It's again joy but what you were looking into was temporary joy now.

Yes so you're graduating you're going higher yeah it's an automatic progression.

Yeah when you just relax and just rest into it it happens.

Yeah just as a pearl diver tying a stone to his waist dives into the sea and takes the pearl lying at the bottom.

So everyone diving deep within himself with non-attachment can attain the pearl of absolute awareness.

If one resorts uninterruptedly to remembrance of one's real nature,

Swarupa smarana,

Until one attains absolute awareness that alone will be sufficient.

We've done remembrance a million times.

Yeah in japaji we called it surati.

Yeah in buddha we called it mindfulness.

Remembering again and again to come back again and again to come back to the awareness.

You will forget you'll get lost in the beauty of people's situations and things again and again turn back in.

Again you'll get lost again you turn back in again you'll get lost again you turn back in.

The remembering to turn back is swarupa smarana.

Turning back and staying there is antarvichara,

Self-inquiry or being with the awareness being established in the awareness.

Remembering to turn back is swarupa smarana.

Only when I remember will I be able to turn no?

Clear?

So swarupa smarana helps in antarvichara.

Inquiring who am I that is in bondage and knowing one's real nature,

Swarupa,

Alone is liberation.

Always keeping the mind fixed in absolute awareness alone is called self-inquiry.

Whereas meditation or dhyana is thinking oneself to be the absolute brahman which is existence,

Consciousness,

Bliss.

Sat chit anand.

Are you seeing the difference in self-inquiry?

It is enquiring.

You are looking in investigation almost as if you have a torch light and you're looking in a dark room.

It's a quest.

Without thought there is no thought there there is no intellect there.

But the moment you do dhyana why is it thought why is it still in the mind?

Because we focus on something called inner object.

So you're focusing on an object an external object and that object is always mind,

Sound,

Mantra,

Breath,

Yeah or the body.

This is all external objects.

They will always keep you stuck at the level of the mind.

But when you look within and not you're not using any more words.

No more intellect is used.

You're just searching and just being.

The subject is with the subject.

He's not looking outside for an object.

Then the subject dissolves into the subject.

It will happen to you at a later stage if it has still not happened.

The subject dissolves.

He collapses into himself.

The self-collapse happens.

Yes and that is where you will notice you will realise the highest.

That there is no I.

That there is no I.

The identification drops here.

That feeling of I.

I am somebody that changes to a recognition of I am nobody or there is no I.

That is the highest knowledge that arises from within.

But that comes at a later stage.

You just start staying there being there.

Relaxing there resting there.

The yogis say that one must renounce this world and go off into the secluded jungles if one wishes to find the truth.

Answer.

The life of action need not be renounced.

Please highlight.

Do not run away to the jungle.

Do not leave your children and family.

You don't have to do that.

Yeah.

All the attachments come back.

So it's no point.

It's no point isolating.

You be here with everything around and now you have to go through.

This implementation of knowledge and becoming dispassionate towards all these things around.

This is the true experience and the path of reaching the truth.

Being in the world surrounded by everything.

I am untouched.

I'm like that lotus in the water but I'm not touched.

Yes.

Being in the world if you cannot have a craving for money,

For position,

For name,

For making it big in the organization.

Yeah.

If you can be desireless being here you have achieved it.

If being amongst everybody you are ready to be nobody.

You don't want to show everybody I am something.

If that thing has gone away.

If you are very simple and humble and it radiates from that personality of yours.

You have reached it right here in this world.

Get it?

So going away is not the solution.

Yeah.

If you meditate for an hour or two every day you can then carry on with your duties.

If you meditate in the right manner then the current of mind induced will continue to flow even in the midst of your work.

It is as though there were two ways of expressing the same idea.

The same line which you take in meditation will be expressed in your activities.

Like for example she gave you her example that she was practicing not reacting to the sensations and it actually became her truth.

So she stopped reacting to her son's you know birth of anger and now you see the equation has changed at home.

Less than one year of practice this happened.

Yeah.

You change you will notice the change in your child.

Children are the reflection of parents.

You will notice that.

So he says if you continue to meditate in this manner what will happen the current of the mind will continue to flow in that even amidst your work.

And the same thing that is there in your meditation you will start seeing it in your activities.

Yeah current of the mind you understood no so her current was non-reaction and that flowed automatically from her meditation into her activities.

So the same thing will happen your current of being in that silence in that nothingness in that quietness will start flowing into your activities.

So if you're doing something you're really very very silent.

Yeah.

So you see the peace percolating into your activities daily work.

Oh.

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