Hello and welcome to this meditation for conflicts in relationships.
Arguments in conflicts are a natural part of any relationship,
But especially in stressful times they can become even more intense and we tend to get into conflicts especially with the people who are closest to us,
Our partners,
Family members or close friends.
This meditation can help you to relax current or future conflicts so that you can meet in love again.
So first take some time to set yourself up for this meditation.
Find a quiet place where you can be for yourself and take a seated or lying position.
Make sure that you are comfortable,
Completely relaxed and that nothing disturbs you anymore.
And whenever you are ready just close your eyes.
Take a deep and long breath and allow yourself to let go with the exhale and simply arrive in yourself.
Turn your attention to yourself and just notice how you rest in this moment,
Completely in the here and now.
And then take a moment to perceive your body in its wholeness,
Its whole shape,
Its weight and also feel your contact with the ground.
Notice how your body is simply carried and held by the ground and in this hold you can simply rest and let go.
Then move your attention to your center,
To the area right below your navel and for a moment just observe the natural flow of your breath here without interfering or changing anything.
Just observe how your breath flows in and out of your belly.
Notice how it gently rises with the inhale and how it lowers with the exhale,
All in its own rhythm.
And then allow your breath to deepen a little bit and imagine how you create a little more space inside of you with each breath.
Imagine how your inner space becomes a little wider with each breath,
How it expands just like an inner sky that slowly opens.
And then invite into your inner space,
In front of your inner eye,
The person with whom you have your difficulties at the moment,
With whom you have a fight or with whom encounters often are very tense.
Picture this person in front of your inner eye and try to perceive them in all details.
What is their posture like?
Which clothes is this person wearing?
How are their gestures and facial expressions?
What are their facial features like?
And see what the sight of this person triggers in you right now.
Which thoughts do appear?
What kind of feelings arise?
And what can you feel in your body when you see this person in front of you?
Simply notice all these thoughts,
Feelings and sensations without any judgement.
Just feel what the person moves inside of you right now.
And then try to perceive this person in their wholeness,
Their whole form and shape,
Simply as this person is facing you right now.
See if you have a sense of how this person might feel at the moment.
Which thoughts,
Feelings,
Needs or desires may this person have?
What might be going on inside this person right now?
Just try for a moment to empathize with this person,
Even if you may not really know what is happening inside them.
And then become aware of how you feel with the current situation between you two.
Maybe the conflict has made you both very rigid and it's hard to reach out to each other.
Maybe you don't really see each other at the moment.
Maybe you just have closed your hearts to each other in order to protect them.
And whatever you feel,
Allow each feeling to just be there.
And what can you see if you now turn to this person and your conflict with a little distance?
What needs might be underlying your conflict?
From your side and from the other side.
Maybe both of you just don't feel understood,
Not valued,
Not seen or not hurt by the other person.
But whatever has brought you into that conflict,
However big the pain or anger may be,
Allow yourself to turn your attention to your heart and deeply connect with it.
Deeply feel into your heart.
And then also become aware of the other person's heart.
Also this person has a heart beating in their chest.
And then imagine a connection between these two hearts.
Maybe imagine a ribbon of light between your hearts and allow yourself to deeply feel that connection.
This connection of your hearts transcends any conflict.
Allow yourself to fully feel into this connection,
No matter how closed your hearts may be.
And you may find that these hearts are not that different,
That both just want to love and to be loved.
Both hearts have not only experienced happy moments,
But also a lot of pain and hard times.
Despite all the conflicts,
However,
Both hearts may feel exactly the same thing and have something in common,
A deep love that unites them both.
Allow your heart to remember this love.
And so in your inner space turn towards the other person and say to them the following words.
This time is as hard for you as it is for me.
I want to be loved just as much as you do.
No matter what happened between us,
You are more important to me than this fight.
I want to forgive you and I ask for your forgiveness.
In this way,
Allow your heart to open to the other person,
Even if it may be just a little.
Maybe you can feel in your heart that the other person is different in many ways,
Yet you are united by the love you share.
Open your heart in an attitude of compassion,
In a willingness to perceive each other's needs and to see from different perspectives.
In this way,
Love has the power to open the heart and melt any conflict.
It opens a space where true encounter is possible.
So for another moment,
Stay with the connection between your hearts and see if there is anything else you might want to say to the other person.
Stay connected to your heart.
Then give yourself a deep breath and take all the love into your heart.
And when you are ready,
It is time to slowly come back,
Then take another deep breath and slowly come back to the outer space.
Then open your eyes again.
Always remember the connection of your hearts.
Lots of love,
Yours,
Martin.
