Oftentimes we want to fit in.
We want to others to like us.
For them to see us as one of one of them.
And two things are happening here.
One we're feeling separate and the other we're feeling small.
That smallness wants to fit in.
And our insecurities rise when we don't.
And really what's happening there is sometimes we feel like we don't have self-confidence.
Like if I had self-confidence then I wouldn't care what others thought about me.
And we're trying to force self-confidence.
And what we're doing is forcing ourselves into a small state.
Smallness wants to fit in and spaciousness fits in others.
How spacious are you?
How spacious you are.
When we look outside we see the ground.
We see the sky.
Sometimes we think the sky is up there.
But really it starts at the ground level.
Once the ground ends spaciousness begins.
And that's a metaphor because spaciousness is everything.
Even the ground.
But let's look at it as the ground ends then spaciousness begins.
And spaciousness has room for the trees and the animals and the rivers and the sky.
The atmosphere.
The universe.
It all fits in.
Nothing is excluded.
How spacious you are.
When you enter a room and you see someone who excludes you or you feel excluded from.
And you start to want to fit in.
Remember your spaciousness.
Be comfortable in your spaciousness.
When you enter the room you feel it.
And everyone in there fits into you because you have the space for them.
The space for them to be who they are.
When we're feeling small we judge them.
We call them superficial or jerks or they're a certain label and they exclude me.
No.
You're excluding them because you're spacious enough to recognize that they're projecting a smallness and that smallness isn't you and it isn't them.
So when you enter the room and you're spacious and comfortable and allowing them to fit into your spaciousness you can see a behavior and have room for that.
Have room for them not to fit your labels.
Have room for them not to fit their labels.
When you look at them,
See them beyond the label.
They're spacious too.
But they may be very focused on being that label and you have room for that to be true.
And comfort and the presence of them trying to fit a label.
That's okay.
You've got room for that.
And when you don't label them,
You leave space for them to be spacious too.
Allowing everyone to escape the labels.
And when you're in that same comfortable space and someone has a behavior that feels exclusionary,
You might notice a part of you has a reaction and you are spacious enough to allow that reaction to come sit beside you and put your arm around it.
It isn't you.
It isn't you exclusively because you are spacious enough to feel that reaction.
Put your arm around it.
Allow it to be there and still have space for more.
These behaviors of others and the reactions of our own self to those behaviors are objects in the spaciousness of you.
You don't have to buy into either one.
Just be aware and allow yourself even more space.
See it's comfortable when you keep making room for more.
You are not just that one reaction.
You're the space to observe that reaction.
You're the space to care for that reaction.
You're the space to allow yourself more options.
In fact,
There's not even a reason to respond with this much space.
It's okay to be there.
And the behaviors of others,
Just observe.
And in that spacious place that you are,
You have room for different decisions about how to communicate to someone who's caught in the smallness of themselves.
You don't have to attack them for it.
In fact,
In the spaciousness,
There is graciousness to allow them to be who they are and holding the space for them to be more,
For them not to be small.
In fact,
In this space,
That which you are,
This spaciousness leaves the door wide open for them to enter that spaciousness to recognize that within themselves.
And self-confidence is naturally built but not required.
Spaciousness isn't about self-confidence.
It's open.
It's comfortable.
It's not concerned about others' reactions to you or their behaviors.
Spacious.
Confidence is allowed here but not required.
It's not a force of will or a blown-out perspective on oneself.
It's an ease and a comfort that you're spacious and that others are too.
Can you be comfortable with the spaciousness that you are?
Can you bring that into a room and allow others to feel it so that their bodies relax into the spaciousness that they are?
It isn't the need to fit in but the willingness to allow others to fit into you.
And that spaciousness doesn't just fill the room.
It goes beyond that.
It extends outside of any building,
Past the road signs,
Beyond the trees,
Into the atmosphere,
Across the universe.
How spacious are you?
How spacious you are.
To the ends of the universe.
There's room for it all.
