Is there someone in your life that you just cannot think of forgiving?
It may be someone who's extremely closely related to you,
Someone who was very close to you,
But you have got hurt.
And you've got so badly hurt that the thought of forgiving them itself is very painful.
You will not forgive such a person.
Can you think of someone like that in your life?
Or if it is not that extreme,
Whoever is the person you find extremely difficult to forgive.
Whenever you think of that person,
A lot of pain comes into you.
So this person is whom we are going to keep as someone that we are going to forgive.
Yes,
Don't run away.
Stay with me.
If you love yourself,
You stay with me.
It does not matter about who that person is,
What they did to you.
It's about you and how you're going to lead your life today,
Tomorrow and for the rest of your life.
Are you going to lug around that past,
That hurt?
And are you going to permit that hurt to keep hurting you?
Don't you want to lead a life of freedom,
A life without disease,
Without pain,
Without hurt,
Without shame,
Without guilt?
It is possible to do that if we let go of that weight,
That dark weight that we are carrying with us.
That we want to wish away or we want to pretend that it is not there.
That's over.
It's in the past.
It does not affect you anymore.
But if that came up in your head now,
It is something that needs to be dealt with.
Let's not be an ostrich and pretend that it is not in your life anymore.
Or you've gone past it.
The bigger person,
It's over.
Or you choose not to think about it.
Or you choose to keep them in a place where you will never forgive them.
It's not about them.
It's about you.
This practice is about you and your life.
It's about how we deal with our present and our tomorrow.
How do we deal with the present and our future?
This practice will help you to remove those dark weights that are unwanted visitors in your body.
It's hiding there and sucking away the energy.
We may not even notice it is there.
Let us remember that forgiving someone is not an act of kindness for them.
It is an act of kindness for you.
When you forgive someone,
You are refusing to permit that person to hurt you anymore.
You have closed the gate.
They are not permitted to hurt you anymore.
You've forgiven them and thrown them out of your life.
Mentally,
Emotionally,
Perhaps not physically.
Perhaps it's a close relationship whom you have to meet on a daily basis.
That is okay.
But they are not inside you.
They are not occupying your mind space.
They are not occupying your emotional space.
They are not permitted to occupy it anymore.
Which is why you forgive them.
Have you understood why we forgive someone?
What benefits would we get by forgiving that person?
In future,
When that person behaves the same way,
We would not get affected.
Because the key to the door is with you.
You are not opening the door for them to hurt you.
You are loving yourself so much.
You are kind to yourself so much.
You are compassionate to yourself so much.
That you deny entry for those who are going to steal away these virtues from you.
They are not permitted anymore to steal away these virtues.
You will be courageous.
You will be smart.
You will be strong.
You will fill yourself with love.
So their hurt can't come past and enter you.
So let us learn one technique.
You would have heard of the Ho'oponopono technique.
But in this framework when you do it,
You would find maximum benefit from this technique.
Let me give you this framework.
We have three types of people we need to forgive.
One is an outsider.
Could be a relative,
Could be a friend,
Could be a stranger,
Could be anyone who has hurt you.
Probably continues to hurt you.
And you are paying the price on a daily basis.
You hardened yourself.
You closed yourself to love.
And you are just defensive,
Hurting,
Pained,
Probably vengeful,
Angry.
Some shame,
Some guilt for feeling this.
You are filled with all these conflicting or complementing emotions.
Which negate you.
Which makes you feel less of a person in your own eyes.
The first category is an outsider who has hurt you by doing something or not doing something.
Saying something or not saying something.
But this has caused you hurt,
Probably continues to cause you hurt.
And you are going to forgive them so you will no more feel those emotions which have degraded you.
The second category of person is you,
That is you and me.
We hurt someone else.
Again by action or inaction.
By saying something or not saying something.
We might have consciously or unconsciously hurt someone.
And that person may be going through pain because of what we did or didn't do.
So you are going to forgive yourself for that.
You are the perpetrator,
Right?
By your own act of your own action or inaction,
You have caused that hurt.
And you are going to forgive yourself so that you don't live with that guilt.
All those negative feelings because of what you have caused someone else.
The third category of people we need to forgive is yourself for hurting yourself.
Don't we do that?
We use words on ourselves that we won't use on anybody we know.
Forget friends.
We won't even use it on enemies.
Our worst enemies,
We don't use such words.
But we use it on ourselves.
We abuse our inner child so badly that our inner child is completely degraded.
So these three categories of people need to be forgiven.
And the practice is within me only.
I don't have to go outside and forgive anyone.
It's about me and how I process whatever happens inside me or outside me.
Because of the way I process it,
I'm experiencing these feelings of hurt,
Anger,
Rejection,
Betrayal,
Pain,
Guilt,
Resentment,
Jealousy.
All these negative feelings are caused by my perception of what is happening to me or what I'm causing on someone else.
By healing this perception,
Our ability to attract the right kind of behavior increases tremendously.
So the Ho'oponopono practice has four statements,
Repeated one after the other.
Statement number one is I am sorry.
When I say I'm sorry,
I'm basically repentant.
I want to absolve myself of the hurt I have caused to myself.
Because whatever we did to someone else or them did to us,
We cannot control their thoughts or feelings.
But we've had certain feelings which were born inside us that stay with us.
And when these feelings are negative feelings,
They need to be healed.
So when I seek forgiveness,
That is when I say I'm sorry,
When I'm repentant,
I'm repentant that I've caused these emotions on myself.
The second statement is please forgive me.
So I'm seeking forgiveness,
I'm asking for forgiveness.
So that brings in a lot of humility.
I'm repentant,
I'm seeking forgiveness.
These are the first few steps of healing,
The first two steps.
The third step is the third statement is thank you.
I am sorry,
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
So that's gratitude.
By being grateful,
I'm acknowledging that I'm there's an act of love which is happening here,
Which is healing me.
So that's a third statement.
Thank you is a third statement.
The fourth statement is I love you.
So first statement is I am sorry.
Second statement is please forgive me.
Third statement,
Thank you.
Fourth statement,
I love you.
I love you doesn't need an explanation.
You're releasing the hormones,
Which are the most powerful healing hormones in the world.
You're bathing yourself with that when you say I love you.
So I'm sorry,
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
I love you.
Now this can be said in a chant and you direct your attention at yourself for having those feelings.
Either you caused it by permitting an outsider to generate those feelings inside you,
Or you caused it by you yourself hurting someone else or yourself.
But the feelings arose because either the first category or second category or third category of hurt happened.
All three need to be bathed away,
Cleansed and healed.
And this happens when we repeat these four statements again and again in our head.
So let us start this practice.
First,
Let us forgive this person who so far you found it difficult to forgive.
Now we're not forgiving that person.
They have caused you so many negative emotions within you that it has hurt you and hurting you and continues to hurt you.
You're going to let go of this hurt by repeating these four statements.
So let us start this practice,
Keeping that single person in mind,
The most negative emotions you've ever faced.
You're thinking of those and you are healing them.
You're busting them away from your life.
Let's start with this practice.
I am sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
I love you.
I am sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
I love you.
I am sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
I love you.
I am sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
I love you.
I am sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
I love you.
I am sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
I love you.
I am sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
I love you.
I am sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
I love you.
I am sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
I love you.
You can repeat these statements 9 times,
18 times,
108 times.
How many ever times that you believe,
Require to wash away those toxins that are buried inside you.
You can repeat it as many days as you like till you are light,
You are healed,
You are yourself.
You don't have outsiders and outside emotions sitting inside you and stealing away your life.
They don't deserve a place inside you.
It's the pure you from within you who is going to show up on a daily basis without this extra baggage,
This extra weight of remorse,
Anger,
Jealousy,
Guilt.
All those feelings which forgiveness washes away.
You fill it with love,
Fill it with compassion.
I love you,
My friend.
You deserve immense love.
I pray that you love yourself to an extent that don't permit anyone at any time to get under your skin and steal away your life.
Reclaim your life.
Live it fully.
I love you.
Take care of yourself.
Bye bye.
Namaste.
