Loss (It's OK)

I wrote this contemplative meditation 2 days after the unexpected passing of my dog Coach. If you have experienced a loss of another, whether is be a family member, a friend or even a furry companion, It is my greatest hope that this reading provide peace and ease while in transition of the emotions you feel. It's ok.

Transcript

Hello,

Good morning,

Good afternoon,

Or good evening.

Make yourself as comfortable as your body will allow you in this moment,

Either seated or laying down.

Take some deep breaths to see if there is space for you to become even more comfortable and connected to yourself.

With your eyes closed or soft gaze open,

Continue to use your breathing as a tool to become present to your environment,

Your body,

And your emotions.

Connect as far inwards as you can in a way that your inner connection sends signals to all those you love,

Here or not here.

May you find peace in the concepts you are about to hear.

Loss.

Loss is one of the most interesting things I have ever felt.

My higher self knows wholeheartedly that no one is ever gone.

We simply leave the vessel that we are in and prepare ourselves for the new one.

You'd think that hanging on to that beautiful sentiment would be enough to get us through without feeling all of the hard emotions and the heartbreak of a loss,

But it doesn't.

We miss them,

And that's okay.

Our hearts physically and emotionally hurt,

And that's okay.

It doesn't matter if you knew them your whole life,

Seven years and ten months,

Or only five days.

If your heart's electrical neurons have connected with another's,

You will feel the sudden emotional separation.

Sometimes our minds want us to put our attention on what we could have done differently.

Did we cause this?

Did we make a wrong decision?

I could have been different.

I should have been different.

And suddenly the three sisters,

Shame,

Blame,

And guilt,

Speak loudly in our minds.

This spiral of judgment can really take us on a trip for hours,

Days,

Or even the rest of our lives.

I recognize that when that happens,

My mind is just trying to protect me from feeling what's in my heart.

The heart knows the facts.

They are not physically here anymore,

And that is the reality of the loss.

But the mind doesn't want us to focus on that reality,

So it takes us on a protective trip to avoid the part that hurts the most,

The separation.

I ask myself,

What is the positive that I can bring into the present?

And the answer is,

My body is just trying to protect me from the reality of the situation,

And that's okay.

So my request is that we start coming from a heart-centered,

Compassionate space for ourselves when we lose another,

Because I would assess that the rational ways in which we are taught to handle loss is not normal.

The heart does not and has never responded in a rational way.

So what does that look like?

If you go down that trip of blame,

Shame,

And guilt,

That's okay.

It means that this separation is just too much for you to bear at this moment in time,

And when you're ready,

The heart will be waiting for that cathartic push forward out of the dark.

If you have unfinished stuff,

Talk to them.

They're listening.

It will seem irrational in your head,

But not for your heart,

And that's okay.

Leave all of their stuff around until you are ready to move them.

I'm going to tell you something that may seem crazy in your mind,

Which is,

At some point,

They always go home.

Their earthly stuff is familiar.

You'll know when it's time to move them,

And that's okay.

They stay.

They stay to help you in your process,

And they stay as long as they are in your mind.

If they are in your mind every second of the day,

Then they will be with you every second of theirs.

Soon,

There will be more space between you thinking of them and not,

But when you do,

They will be there.

However far apart the minutes,

The hours,

The days,

Or months are,

And that's okay.

Get on that daily roller coaster and buckle up into all of the feelings.

One day will feel lighter,

And the next,

It's like day one.

They want you to live and grow on all levels,

And living here comes with so many feelings.

That's actually what makes Earth so special.

We came here to feel all of the things,

And that's okay.

Lastly,

Bring into your heart all of the ways they fulfilled their karmic contracts and all of the ways that you fulfilled yours while they were here.

This might help with completion,

Because fulfilling our contracts is another reason why we're here.

So don't be afraid to think of that other right now.

It's not wallowing,

Like some might say.

It's so beautifully important that they show up in your heart from time to time.

So go ahead,

Place your hands over your heart while you connect with them.

Thank you.

You helped me see that unconditional love really exists.

Thank you.

You helped me learn how to regulate my nervous system just by being near.

Thank you.

You taught me that grudges and complaints are futile,

Because not once were you in that space.

Thank you.

You taught me that support can look like a simple leaning against me,

A big smile,

Or bringing me some of your favourite things.

Thank you.

You taught me that getting outdoors was the best stress relief.

And thank you.

Because of you,

I learned more presence than I ever have.

I learned what real respect looks like.

I learned massive amounts of patience.

And I learned how to love so very deeply.

Take a moment to thank them in your way for helping you learn something while they were here.

And then when you're ready,

Take a deep breath and let your light and theirs fill your heart.

Reviews

It is so hard to let go of my dog. I have so much grief. Thanks for this talk, it helped me a lot 💗

Thank you for helping me feel the loss instead of the three sisters. This week I had to say goodbye to my sweet dog of almost 13 years. I’d had him since he was a tiny ball of fluff and he would have been 13 this Friday. Thank you for giving me permission to feel the pain and the understanding that it’s okay to feel all of it, even the guilt and shame and “should haves”. I needed this.

Thank you for helping me deal with the loss of my best friend and some of my family who I have lost over the last few years and months.☺️🙏❤️💖

Thank you so much.

Thank you for those words 🙏

Thank you 🙏

I wish there was an option for far more stars than five!
I lack the words to tell you what your talk meant to me, how beautiful its content and expression. So freeing, lifting rationality’s weight from already wounded hearts and celebrating our loves rather than suffocating our losses.
Sorry, I know I’m going on but this is one of those moments when nothing less feels anything like enough.
Thank you 💜

this was exactly what i needed to hear. somehow everything you said was so applicable to the person i lost. thank you so much for this beautiful therapeutic track and your kind words and energy 🤍

😭 i lost my dog of 11 years one week ago. this was so healing. Thank you ❤️‍🩹

Thank you. Needed this today!

Helpful as I just lost a best friend a few days ago

I can't thank you enough for this. I'm coming to terms with the fact that I may lose my beloved cat TT, my best friend within the year. I've lost before but this feels different. She has brought me so much joy. She's been with me for the best & worse times of my life, & for my awakening of which I have sobbed over her when i was in bliss, as to how amazing & beautiful she is. I've thanked her so many times & finally understood that we have a contract, & that I would see her again because we are 1. I didn't even know this meditation was about the lose of your beloved friend until after. Then I cried some more. Trying to keep the knowing that they are always here is the hardest. And that we will see them again, and most likely be in our lives after this one too! Thank you again for this meditation and your beautiful words.