Cope With Bullying

A guided meditation designed to ease the effects of bullying in your mind, body and spirit. By Dave Harding from Gold Coast Meditation Australia.

Transcript

I'm Dave Harding.

This is a guided meditation to help you cope with bullying.

It's a guided meditation,

It's best if you find yourself in a nice comfortable place where you can relax.

Certainly not while driving or doing any other activity that requires your concentration.

To help you to begin to relax it might be easy to close your eyes and just focus on your breathing so that with every breath in you're taking in the air and oxygen that's available and with every breath out,

Well just simply letting go of any stress or tension that might be there.

You may begin to notice how each breath can be more relaxing than the breath before that as each breath allows you to relax more and more.

You might notice your breathing beginning to slow down a little bit now.

It's taking longer breaths,

Longer breaths in,

Longer breaths out.

Just slowing down,

Just that little bit.

Each breath more relaxed.

Be aware of all the sounds around,

Inside,

Outside.

You may notice the sound of your heart beating.

You may notice the sound of your breathing.

The sounds of the music,

The sounds within the sounds of the music.

Hear the sound of my voice and sounds outside,

The traffic,

The weather,

Other people.

Just allow each and every sound to help you relax so that each sound is more relaxed,

Each breath is more relaxed.

Being the receiver of bullying can have many unwanted effects.

The effects are not as important as the way you deal with them.

So let's take a moment to distance ourselves just for a short time.

This can be done easily as you sit there feeling relaxed,

Comfortable and safe.

So just float out of your body now.

Just float out of your body into the room that you are in.

Perhaps looking at yourself from behind yourself or beside yourself.

It's completely safe to do this.

Just float out of yourself so that you can observe yourself from the outside.

Imagine if you will a large screen in front of you that you were looking at,

Just a blank screen for now.

Getting ready to be switched on.

Perhaps you're holding them remote in your right hand or your other hand.

Maybe even feeling a little hesitant with expectations of what may or may not appear on screen.

But remember you hold the remote control so you have full control.

Preparing to switch the screen on as you get ready.

The image that is about to appear on screen is that of a bullying incident you are familiar with.

It doesn't matter which one because you can replay this at any time.

But the incident will be freeze framed at a moment in time before the bullying started.

Ideally just a few seconds before.

As you look at the screen dim it down as much as you like.

Turn the volume down to an acceptable level.

Turn the colour down to black and white if you like.

And finally just shrink the image down to a size where you can still see it.

And press play.

This is the last time you will replay this bullying so stay with it.

Play the bullying all the way through to the end.

Notice what you were doing as you watch you watching you on the screen and the bullying.

When you get to the end press pause now.

That's it.

In a moment,

Not now but in a moment.

I'm going to ask you to rewind the clip but at twice the speed.

Everything going backwards at twice the speed.

The motions at twice the speed.

Reverse speaking at twice the speed.

Get ready to fast rewind all the way to the beginning and then stop it.

And go.

Rewind all the way back.

Double the speed.

Remember to stop it when it's back at the beginning.

When it's stopped I would like you to jump right back to the end again and rewind it at double the speed again.

Backwards,

Faster.

Talking backwards,

Faster.

I'll even add some music.

And go.

And when it's stopped jump right back to the end again and get ready to rewind it really really really fast.

All the motion going backwards really really fast.

All the talking going backwards really really fast.

And here's some music to help.

And go.

Once it's stopped turn off the screen.

Well done.

You can now float back into your being all the way back into you.

Perhaps even taking a moment to scan your very being from the top of your head to the tips of your toes.

And you might just notice a difference.

A difference that lets you know that you can't think about it in the same way even if you tried you can't.

You see the whole purpose of running it backwards is to scramble the neurological wiring the way your mind has been thinking.

It wasn't helping you to relive it so now you don't have to anymore.

It's a bit of a desensitizing process.

It's good.

And now we turn our attention to the body just for a moment.

Any images that come up shrink them down immediately.

Any images at all.

Shrink them down all the way down.

Turn the color down.

And push them all the way off to the side in the far distance.

Just move them all the way off over there almost invisible.

Just move them off all the way over there.

And then notice their voice.

This time change it.

Change it to a funny voice like a cartoon character like Mickey Mouse and hear their voice in that voice saying those things that it said in the funny voice.

Hello Mousecaduce remember me you're not good enough.

Or whatever voice you've chosen.

And in the future when you hear their voice you can hear the funny voice instead.

Try not to smile too hard at them but you can.

It's safe to do so.

But imagine now just for a moment being this person.

Imagine what they have been through to get to the point that they're at.

Where they have to be so small.

So insignificant to resort to bullying.

Any images that come to mind shrink them down.

Shrink them all the way down over there.

It's perhaps time to even have a little pity on them.

For they know no better.

And they are no better.

Just have a little pity for them.

They're not as smart as you.

They haven't been able to work out a better way.

It's their history.

It's their story.

It's them.

Have pity on them.

One day we can hope they see the light.

You might even want to seek understanding.

How much love they've missed out on.

Perhaps from parents and others.

Maybe one day.

Maybe one day.

Now back to you.

Think of the bullying for the last time.

Notice where in your body the feelings are located.

Whereabouts in your being they are.

Notice them.

And notice which direction they are moving.

As all feelings move.

If they didn't they would habituate into us and we wouldn't feel them at all.

So notice how they're moving.

Is it a wave of feelings?

Are they spinning left?

Are they spinning right?

Tumbling forwards?

Tumbling backwards?

Just really notice the feelings.

Which direction they're spinning.

And slow them down.

Slow them all the way down.

Slow them all the way down until they stop.

And they stop.

Now move them in the opposite direction.

Backwards.

The reverse of what they were doing.

Just move all the feelings in the opposite direction.

Perhaps a little faster until it feels right for you.

And notice the change now.

And now turning to you.

Turning to you and your confidence or self esteem.

We're going to build a golden bubble of confidence and self esteem all the way around you.

Start first.

Take a moment to work out where your confidence and self esteem is at the moment.

On a scale of 1 to 10 where do you think you are at?

Just a brief thought is all that's required.

Now that's great.

Imagine a time in the future where perhaps you have become an authority on what you have dealt with.

With the sole intention of helping others.

You've made it all the way through the other side.

Maybe even only just for you.

But imagine being able to help just one other person.

All the wisdom.

All the success.

All the confidence.

Perhaps you're standing tall.

Your posture tells the story before you do.

Such an air of confidence.

Of grace.

Of style.

It's within yourself a sense of knowing.

Succeeding.

Maybe even remembering other successes from the past.

The moment you've been so proud.

Or you might know someone who is this person if you can't imagine yourself.

A person who has dealt with their own stuff so amazingly.

And they look so confident.

So successful.

They're proud.

Their posture.

All the confidence.

All the everything that goes with it.

So whether it's a future you or someone else,

What would they like to tell you about what you have been or might still be going through?

Would they be telling you how much you matter to yourself,

To loved ones,

To future loving ones?

Would they tell you how respected you are?

Respect you to yourself,

But by others as well?

Would they tell you how assertive you are in the most unusual situations?

Would they tell you how proud of you they are for everything you've done?

Would they tell you to reach out to others?

You're not alone.

You're not the first.

Would they tell you it's okay to walk away as long as you walk tall,

Walk proud?

Would they tell you how brave you've been?

Braver than most.

And would they tell you what an inspiration you've been to others?

A role model.

A true example of someone to look up to.

Appreciate all of this and more.

Whatever else future you or someone else you admire has to share with you.

And as you do,

Imagine what shape this takes on.

And allow this shape to present itself in front of you.

What shape does it take?

What color is it?

What size is it?

Notice all the energy that it encompasses.

Notice all the confidence.

All the strength.

All the self-esteem.

The proudness.

And all the other resources that make this real.

And what I'd like you to do,

If you will.

I'd like you to bring that towards you and place it in your body where it belongs.

All the confidence.

All the strength.

All the self-esteem.

All the everything.

And then let it expand to your entire being.

Every cell.

Every atom.

Every molecule.

The quantum particles and all the spaces in between.

Just filling with delight of your newfound confidence.

Notice your posture strengthening.

The air of confidence.

Absolutely everything that goes with it.

And then I'd like you to expand that around your being.

To a golden bubble,

If you will.

Protecting you.

Encompassing you.

Knowing that when you need it,

Just simply take on the posture that you can take on that allows all of that confidence.

All of that strength.

All of that self-esteem to come flooding through you.

Instantly.

Effortlessly.

Easily.

Feel it.

Own it.

Believe it.

Be it.

Live it.

Because this is the new you now.

Complete with all the confidence.

All the strength.

All the self-esteem.

The wisdom.

The knowledge.

And the wherewithal to know.

When you know to know what to do.

Take a moment to soak it all in.

All of it.

Protected by the golden bubble.

All of it.

In the golden bubble.

Congratulations.

And take a moment to scan your very being.

Perhaps noticing how different things are now.

Enjoying.

Delighting in being this being.

At this time.

In this place.

A sense of knowing.

I'll leave you with that for a few minutes.

Feeling this being.

At this time.

In this place.

Just a sense of knowing.

I'm counting down now from five to one.

And at one you'll be back into full awareness.

Ready to embrace the day.

Five.

Nearly there.

Feeling brighter and beginning to awake.

Four.

Wiggling your fingers and toes.

Becoming more and more aware.

Three.

Beginning to stretch and feel more alive than perhaps you have done in a long time.

Two.

Opening your eyes.

Gently coming into full awareness now.

And one.

Welcome back.

Wide awake.

That sense of knowing.

Of being.

Of loving you.

In the golden bubble.

In the golden bubble.

Reviews

Thank you so much for this Dave. I started a new job in April and have been bullied by my manager. I’m back on Monday having been off with hypertension for a month. I stumbled on your meditation and it was brilliant. Thank you 🙏🏽

Wonderful! I’m being bullied relentlessly in a social scene, and it’s been traumatic for me. This meditation redirected the fixation on theindicents and the bully, so I could process and let it go. Life-changing! Thank you.

Excellent!

This was amazing. I do feel a sense of healing right away. An acceptance and a newness. Maybe that is what resilience is. I appreciate this. Thank you for sharing this with us 😊

Very soothing!
Thank you! I am determined to change things. This meditation will help me!

Very Helpful, Thank you.

Thank you! This was quite challenging for me and blew a lot of energy out when I reversed direction for the felt sensations. The headache that crept in during my attempt to create my bubble is telling me something. I have not found the answer yet and will keep looking, try again.

This was such a helpful meditation. Thank you!

I had been hurting for 15+ years and this meditation put the biggest smile on my face. I cannot thank you enough - From Wollongong NSW.

Very helpful thank you 🙏🏻

Wow! Thank you for this. I hope that if I see my bully again, I hear his voice the way I did in the meditation and that the circus music plays in my mind!

This was wonderful and very helpful, thank you so much!

Brilliant 💛 I'm standing tall in my new golden bubble. 😆 Thanks ever so much Dave.

Wow! One of those “ just at the right time” powerful! Spot on as they say! Many many thanks ! And love!

This meditation was very helpful, thanks. :)

Excellent. Thank you so much.

This unusual approach actually even made me laugh at the whole situation, which was a good and surprising reaction on my part. Anyway, definitely I feel a bit of a shift from fear to self-knowing. So thank you.

Bullied severely in my younger years of secondary school and then in relationships. I will visit this again. I never dealt with it properly.

This meditation is amazing, so helpful. Thankyou xxxx

Perfect! Thank u very much!