Gentle Grieving

If you’re grieving a loss of any kind (whether a person or another type of loss or transition, recent or distant), this meditation will help you hold space for and process your grief. Grief is an emotion that we tend to stuff down or distract ourselves from, convinced that we are “done grieving” simply because a certain amount of time has passed. In reality, layers of grief persist within us, slowly coming to the surface over time like waves that we ride for many years, each loss reminding us of prior ones.

I encourage you to make space for it – in this meditation or otherwise – and discover what it has to teach you.

Transcript

Hey there.

Welcome to this meditation on gentle grieving.

I'm Christy Cerullo,

And thank you for sitting down for meditation today.

You can begin by finding stillness wherever you're seated and just kind of landing in your body.

Begin to trace the breath as it enters into your nose,

Breathe into your head,

Your throat,

Your chest,

Your belly.

Just trace the line of your breathing.

See if you can send your breath all the way down to your toes.

Notice,

Is your breath soft or rushed?

Allow it to soften and deepen.

Allow it to grow wide,

Filling up your entire body and the space around your body.

Imagine your breath creating a cocoon around you,

A space around your body that is entirely yours and entirely protected and totally quiet.

Give yourself this space to allow any emotions to arise over the course of this meditation that you are ready to feel and process and release.

You can follow the pattern of your natural breath.

I'm just going to talk a little bit about grief and how there are many different things that we can be grieving.

You may be grieving the loss of someone you cared about or the beginning or ending of something in your life.

We can grieve in anticipation of losing someone.

We can grieve at any transition point,

Such as leaving one job for another job,

Or one home for another home,

Or one identity for another identity.

You can grieve for something you never even had.

You can grieve for the earth.

You can grieve for someone else's grief.

I had this experience once.

I was taking a walk outside,

And I was walking along a road or sidewalk that I walk down all the time,

And I was stunned as I was walking along the sidewalk.

I saw all along this road,

All of the trees,

Every single big tall tree that had lived along this sidewalk for the entire length of this road had been chopped down,

And the big magnificent trunks of every tree was just lying on the ground,

Stripped of its branches and its leaves,

And I just saw them all lined up ahead of me,

And I felt a very deep sadness and shock of it,

And I invalidated myself,

Thinking,

Why am I so sad that they cut down these trees?

There must have been a good reason to do that,

But it was a real feeling that I felt upon seeing it,

And so let's not invalidate what we feel or tell ourselves that our grief should be one way or another way.

Let's just be with it.

So come to yourself and imagine or envision that you're sitting on a beach,

And you're the only one at this beach.

You're sitting in the sand,

And you're facing the ocean,

Watching the waves come in and out.

Notice what time of day is it at this beach?

What season are you in?

How do you find the weather here?

You close your eyes,

And you can smell the ocean.

You hear the waves.

You feel a breeze against your skin.

Pay attention to the temperature of that breeze against your skin.

You look out at the water.

Notice what color this water is,

And how the sand is a different color where the water has touched it than it is under your feet and your fingertips.

Allow yourself to take in all of the sensations of sitting on this beach.

There's no one to disturb you or distract you.

You can just sit here and listen to the waves and watch the horizon.

As you do this,

You know notice how big the waves are in this ocean,

How quickly they rush up towards your feet,

How loudly they crash against the shore.

This movement,

It happens quite effortlessly.

Just find where in your physical body you are mimicking the movement of these waves.

Find the waves that are moving inside you,

And give them permission to flow in whatever way they are naturally inclined to in this moment.

As you begin to feel that movement in your body,

That flow,

Feel it coming in and moving out without needing to control it,

Without forcing it to be bigger or smaller,

Louder or quieter.

See if you notice these waves in any particular part of your body.

Maybe it's just a feeling in your entire space,

This flowing in and flowing out.

Notice the nature of your waves.

Are they tall and crashing?

Are they soft and flowing?

Are they holding one thing or many things?

Grief comes in many forms,

And it changes form,

And it looks different from moment to moment.

So be with yourself wherever you are,

And wherever your waves are.

You can let yourself sink into the sand that you're sitting on,

And realize that you are supported here.

You let the beach hold you in a way that no one else and nothing else can hold you.

Sometimes we stop ourselves from grieving,

Or from crying,

Or being in sadness,

Because we feel the space we're in,

Where the people we're around,

Can't handle those feelings or those expressions.

But this place can hold it.

So try your best to let yourself be held here,

And see what you are able to bring to the surface,

What you are able to release.

You can still hear the waves,

And maybe you can still feel the waves,

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Hold it,

Shine it,

Without any effort,

Just by being who you are,

And you're always nurturing it,

And honoring it,

When you honor your feelings,

And your emotions moving through you,

You can sink your fingers into the sand,

And notice how that feels in your hands,

Take this moment to bookmark this place,

This quiet,

Safe,

Holding place,

Which you can always come back to and revisit,

Where you can always find solace,

I invite you to come back to your physical body,

Keep your eyes closed,

Just wiggle your feet,

And your toes,

Your hands,

And your fingers,

Take your hands,

And we're going to cross them over our chest,

And hook each hand into the opposite,

Just under the arm,

In the armpit,

We're giving ourselves a little hug,

Our arms are crossed over our chest,

Each hand is in the opposite armpit,

And our thumbs are resting just under your collarbone,

And pointing up,

Just hold yourself here,

This little hug,

Which is more than just a hug,

This is a really nice healing hold,

Using the art of jinshin jutsu,

Which is a really lovely energy healing practice,

If you hold these points with your hands,

You are supporting so many things in your body,

Which will help with the grieving process,

Your heart,

Your lungs,

Your immune system,

Your ability to inhale,

And exhale,

By holding yourself here,

You are supporting the place in the body where grief lives,

So tune into your fingertips,

See what you hear with them,

Your pulse,

Your energy running,

Your breath coming in and out,

You are healing yourself,

Use these last few moments to have gratitude for yourself,

For showing up today,

For being willing to go deeper,

For being open to facing a really difficult emotion,

You will face it again,

And again,

And it is not something to be afraid of,

Or run from,

Or distract ourselves from,

Or push ourselves through,

It is a teacher,

A very wise and valuable teacher,

And you are learning from it,

So give yourself credit for learning today,

Stay with yourself in this hug for as long as it feels good to do so,

And when you are satisfied,

You can open your eyes,

And continue with your day.

Reviews

This is stunning and very soothing, thank you so much. Sending so much care to everyone 💐💓