Explore And Dissolve Racial Bias

In order to dissolve the racial bias of a culture, we must recognize the bias and the pain that we have inherited from generations of intolerance and suffering. In this practice, we ask ourselves, "what have I learned that contributes to this cycle of abuse?" Through this investigation, we become more able to allow these difficult emotions to live out their life cycles within us, and dissolve, rather than keeping their energy alive by reacting to them and passing them on to our communities.

Transcript

Come to a comfortable seat.

If you are sitting in a chair,

Put your feet flat on the ground.

Put your hands on your knees or in your lap.

Calm down.

Take a deep breath in.

Exhale and arrive in your seat.

Inhale again.

Hold it.

Exhale and arrive.

An uprising in the world has come.

An awareness of what has always been there has arrived.

What has always been there is insidious,

Existential,

Cruel,

Hurtful.

With everything going on in the world,

Being turned upside down with the pandemic,

And with these killings,

Things have reached a head.

We can no longer turn away from this violence and from this bias.

We must become aware and we must open to the things that have been in our lives,

For our entire lives,

For our histories,

Our ancestors' lives,

Countless generations.

It is time that we take a hard look at ourselves and explore what it is inside of us,

Inside of our generations,

Inside of our cultures,

Our country,

Our history that has brought us to this place.

Take a deep breath in.

Hold it.

And exhale.

I am here sitting with you,

Colored,

White,

Privileged,

And struggling.

Struggling to understand what is going on around us.

Struggling to find what I can do.

And struggling because maybe I am part of the problem.

From my privileged background,

From my history,

From my growing up,

Just living in this country,

Maybe I have learned to be part of the problem.

To heal our fellows,

Our peers,

Our neighbors,

We have to do the work ourselves,

The deep work of understanding the contribution that we make to this race bias,

To this literally mindless racism.

To be aware,

We must not react.

We must create space to understand why we want to react.

And when we do,

We can begin to dissolve those responses.

We can begin to put an end to the lines of racism,

To the lines of hate,

To the lines of resentment and pain that are here now.

Take a deep breath in.

Hold it.

And exhale.

Take a deep breath in again.

Hold it.

And exhale.

Ground into your seat.

Feel the earth,

The chair,

The cushion,

The mat rising up to support you.

And when you inhale,

Feel the top of your body rising up to stand tall.

Exhale.

Now imagine that there is someone sitting in front of you,

Facing you.

This is someone that you have a difficult relationship with.

Whether it's the shopkeeper that keeps messing up your order or your next door neighbor who keeps yelling late into the night,

Preventing you from sleeping.

Whether it's something worse,

Something more deep-seated that you dislike about them,

Resent about them.

That person is there in front of you,

Facing you.

You may have words and labels for what you're feeling right now.

From annoyance to frustration to resentment to anger.

Whatever it is,

Find the root of that word in your body.

And if you don't have a label for it,

Good.

Find the root of that,

The feeling in your body.

Feel the center of energy that is emanating and pushing you to action.

Pushing you to say something to this person,

Pushing you to turn away from this person.

Whatever it is,

Find it.

Maybe it's a balling up of your fists.

Maybe it's a clenching in your stomach or your solar plexus,

Grinding of your teeth,

A tightness in your throat.

Bring your attention to that center of energy and breathe into it.

Fill it up with your breath and your life force and exhale out from that center of energy.

Breathe into it again and out from that center.

What does it feel like?

Does it hurt?

Does it scare you?

Feel it and breathe into it.

Breathe into it.

Now breathe that energy into your right hand.

Inhale and pull it into your right hand and hold it there.

Inhale and breathe into your right hand again and hold it there.

Feel that energy.

Feel the way that it moves in your body and in your hand.

Breathe into it.

Exhale it out through your feet.

Inhale into it again.

Exhale out through your feet.

Now let everything go.

Let the person in front of you disappear.

Fall away.

Now imagine sitting in front of you,

Facing you,

Someone very dear to you.

Maybe a sibling,

Parent,

Best friend,

Teacher or mentor.

They're just sitting in front of you,

Facing you,

Looking into your eyes.

What do you feel in your body?

Where do you feel it?

Maybe a lightness.

Maybe an opening of your heart.

Whatever it is,

Just feel it.

Put your attention in that center of energy.

Breathe into it.

Now inhale that energy into your left hand.

Notice what it feels like in your hand.

Let it pulse there.

Then exhale it out through your feet.

Inhale into your hand again.

Inhale it out through your feet.

And now let that person in front of you dissolve away.

Now call to mind the feeling that you felt with the first person with whom you have a difficult relationship and inhale that energy back into your right hand.

Let it be there.

And your next inhale,

Let that energy move through you into your left hand and become the energy of the person that you hold dear.

Feel it there in your left hand.

Now inhale that energy back to your right hand to the difficult relationship and inhale to your left hand to the dear relationship.

Inhale right and difficult.

Exhale left and dear.

Now inhale and hold both energies in their respective hands at the same time.

Difficult on the right,

Dear on the left.

Imagine these energies rising up closer and closer to each other in front of your chest and merge with one another.

Notice what this feels like.

And as you inhale,

Imagine that energy moving slowly towards your heart center.

Slowly and surely merging into your heart,

Both energies,

Difficult and dear,

And illuminating your heart center.

And notice how you feel.

Can you hold both of these feelings in you at the same time?

Can you recognize the difficulty with the first energy?

Acknowledge it,

Hold it,

Allow it to exist without responding to it.

And can you hold the energy of the dear person at the same time in the same capacity,

Acknowledging it,

Welcoming it,

Holding it,

And not reacting to it,

Either attracted or repelled by either energy,

But simply noticing them.

Take a deep breath in,

Hold it,

Feel the energy of both interactions inside you,

And then exhale it all the way out through your root in your feet and ground.

Be still.

And now imagine sitting in front of you,

Facing you,

Is a mirror.

You are looking into your own eyes as you are,

As you know yourself.

Notice what you feel.

Notice where your energy goes in your body,

And bring your awareness to that point.

Breathe into and out of that center of energy,

And allow it to exist there as it is without responding to it,

Simply noticing its presence and the way it feels.

Allow it to exist,

And allow it to dissolve as you exhale and ground.

Now lock eyes with yourself in that mirror again,

And watch as your skin darkens,

Your hair darkens.

Slowly but surely,

You're becoming darker and darker and darker.

Notice what you feel.

Do you feel an opening or relaxing of your muscles,

A lightening of your weight?

Do you feel a clenching or a collapsing?

Whatever it is,

Notice it.

Keep looking at yourself in the mirror,

Skin and hair darkest night,

And notice what you feel in your body,

The energy that is in your body in that center.

Breathe into it.

Breathe out of it.

Breathe into it.

Breathe out of it.

Let it exist.

Let it stand in its place and exist without a response from you.

No labeling,

No actions,

No words.

Just noticing.

Breathe into it.

Breathe out of it.

Breathe into it.

Breathe into it.

Breathe out of it.

Allow it to dissolve as you breathe,

As you look at yourself in this mirror.

Allow it to be.

Breathe deeply into the center of energy and exhale that energy down into the ground.

Exhale into it again.

Exhale and ground through your root or your feet.

Walk eyes with yourself in the mirror again.

See your dark hair,

Your dark skin.

Now see it lightening.

Lighter and lighter transitioning through the different colors,

The shades,

The tones.

Lighter and lighter and lighter.

Your skin,

Your hair,

As light as day.

Look at yourself and notice what you feel.

Where you feel it.

Perhaps it's a heaviness,

A tightening,

Clenching.

Perhaps it's lightness,

An opening up,

A lifting of weight.

Whatever it is and wherever it is,

Just notice it.

Bring your attention to that energy center and once more breathe into it.

Breathe out of it.

Keep looking at yourself.

Breathe into that center and breathe out of it.

Allow it to be without reacting to it.

Give it the space for it to exist.

For it to cycle through its lifetime as a sensation arising,

Persisting,

And falling away.

Breathe into the center.

Breathe out of the center.

Breathe into it.

Breathe out of it.

Take a deep breath in and exhale that energy out through your feet or your root.

Look at the mirror one more time.

Once more,

See yourself as you are,

As you know yourself.

Breathe in.

Exhale and ground.

Breathe in once more.

Exhale and ground.

And sit,

Looking at yourself in the mirror as you know yourself in this moment.

And imagine two bright lines emanating from above down into the top of your head.

These lines representing your ancestry and merging inside of you through your crown down through your spine and grounding.

Notice within each of these two lines where those sensations that we just felt,

Staring at yourself in the mirror from dark to light,

Light to dark.

Notice where those sensations are coming from,

Where they came from in your ancestry culturally,

Genetically,

Socially,

And recognize that perhaps they are not your own sensations.

Perhaps you have just grown up with them and they're ingrained in you,

Generation to generation,

Passing it on.

And perhaps the generations above you had the exact same thing,

Consciously or unconsciously.

Tensions of clenching,

Of tightening,

Of relaxing,

Of lifting.

Perhaps they inherited them too.

Notice that you in this moment can choose.

You can choose to pass those sensations on,

Those reactions on,

Or you can choose to sit with them,

Acknowledge them.

Let them live out their life cycle within you,

Within the spaciousness that you have created and fall away.

It isn't easy.

Of course not.

But it is such important work that we do understand the roots of these pains,

Work to release them,

To hold space for them so that they may dissolve within us rather than passing them on to the world around us.

Inhale up through your spine,

Through that light,

And exhale and ground.

Inhale again.

Exhale and ground all of your energy out.

One more time,

Take the deepest breath that you've taken all day.

Hold it.

Exhale it all out through your feet or your root and let it go.

Exhale it all out.