04: Amy Torres On Dealing With Overwhelm

On today's episode of From Anxiety To Love Radio, I’m thrilled to welcome Amy Torres. We dive into the topic of dealing with overwhelm from a spiritual yet practical standpoint.

Transcript

This is From Anxiety to Love Radio,

The show about undoing anxiety through A Course in Miracles and other pathways of love.

Gain insights and tools to deepen your awareness of the peace that is already in you.

I'm your host Corinne Zumko.

Today on From Anxiety to Love Radio,

I'm thrilled to welcome Amy Torres.

We dive into the topic of dealing with overwhelm from a spiritual yet practical standpoint.

And a heads up,

We use some spiritual lingo.

Please check out episode two if the language of A Course in Miracles bugs you.

If it does,

You're not alone and I can help you through it.

Let's listen in to my conversation with Amy.

Welcome everyone.

I'm here with Amy Torres.

Amy is a well loved spiritual teacher and a student of A Course in Miracles since 1997.

She is author of the book Sweet Dreams of Awakening and worked for many years as a Gestalt psychotherapist.

Along with her work as a yoga instructor,

She's uniquely qualified to take an experiential approach to A Course in Miracles.

This means she can help you experience the course,

Actually feeling the results of its practice in your breath,

Your heart,

Your muscles,

Your cells throughout your entire body.

Welcome,

Amy.

I'm so happy to have you.

Oh,

So great to be here,

Corinne.

Such a pleasure.

Hi everybody.

Oh,

So today's topic is dealing with overwhelm and this is so practical.

I love that we came up with this topic,

That you came up with this topic,

Amy,

And I'm wondering if you can just share a little bit about what inspired you to talk about this topic today.

Well,

I have to giggle because many of you know that Scott and I picked up and left Florida and moved to California in December 2015.

So we've been in California a little over a year and that was a great source of overwhelm,

Even though it was exciting and we had a big opportunity here,

Just having to pack up the house and move and be in a temporary apartment and then move again because we found a house and then the house needed repairs.

And during all of these logistical practical problems,

I hate using the word problems.

I like to use challenges or issues.

There was also having to reestablish my business because I work from home and I have an online business,

An e-course,

A book,

I have a coaching practice and now I was in a new place.

It didn't affect that much because I work with people over Skype and over the phone,

But still it kind of had me reassessing what do I want my focus to be now?

And there were so many questions,

You know,

The questions of prioritizing.

Do I put home repairs first?

Do I put working on my business first?

Do I put debt management first now that we've taken on a big mortgage?

And I felt overwhelmed.

It was like a big avalanche.

Well,

Moving,

That'll do it.

Moving business stuff,

Trying to figure out what comes first,

That will do it.

And I think we can all relate to being overwhelmed just with the day to day life hassles that show up.

So I'm wondering if we can move into talking about dealing with overwhelm,

Particularly I'm curious to focus on the perspective of the course and perhaps how you moved through your feelings of overwhelm.

Yeah,

So this is what I love sharing with everybody that I really felt at some points in a very dark place emotionally or not even emotionally,

You guys,

It was energetically.

I felt kind of squeezed.

And yet,

Because of the course and my other spiritual practices,

My state of mind remained excellent.

What I mean is that there was something in me that was unmoved by the troubles in my life.

It was aware.

And yet,

There was a constancy to my inner smile,

I would say,

And everybody has that inner smile or that inner light.

So that held me,

It kind of held me while I really sank into some very dark places.

And what I did was continually surrender to the Holy Spirit or inner teacher,

Which is how the course refers to spiritual guidance.

Sometimes the Holy Spirit is called the comforter,

And I would seek comfort there.

And I would allow some kind of message to come through.

And the message I got over and over was,

Get some help,

Talk to somebody.

I needed some human contact.

I was in a new place where I didn't really know anyone.

And I reached out.

So in 12-step groups like Al-Anon and AA,

People find out that one of the hardest things to do in life is to ask for help.

And A Course in Miracles is referred to as a self-study course because you go inside and connect with your inner teacher.

But then you're sent back out into the world to practice forgiveness with your brothers and sisters.

So there's this constant guidance,

This directing of us to go back out into the world.

And that's what I was told to do.

And I reached out to spiritual teachers.

Almost every single one got on the phone with me.

So I spoke to people like Gina Lake and Nir Mala and John Prendergast.

And I discovered Rupert Spira and just took a leap of faith and spontaneously,

At the last minute,

Attended a retreat with him and found out his wife was Ellen Emmett,

Who does all this body work that I love.

And many of you might be aware that Bill Freeh and I then were blessed enough to do two video interviews with Rupert Spira.

And each of these encounters were validating,

Were encouraging,

Were inspiring,

And they were not pressuring.

So nobody said to me,

You've got to snap out of this.

What I was told,

Corinne,

Over and over again was that it was my time to commit to meditating,

That I really needed a daily meditation practice.

And I'm sure many of you can relate to the idea that when feeling overwhelmed and agitated,

Meditation is the last thing that I wanted to do.

But I felt in my core that it was true.

That is what I needed.

You're hitting on so many rich points,

Amy,

That I just have to dive into.

So first,

The teachers that you mentioned are teachers of non-duality,

Correct?

Yes.

Beautiful,

Beautiful.

I love that they came to the same message that it's your time to commit to meditating.

And I so relate to what you said about how there are times when we are so worked up that the last thing we want to do is go sit still because we feel like we could just keep getting more done.

If I can just take another hour or another two hours,

I'll get so much more off my to-do list.

And yet that pausing and coming back into our bodies,

Coming back into being has so much power to shift the energy that we're in that then our doing after that is much different.

Has that been your experience?

Yes.

And I know that you have turned to meditation and that you teach meditation.

So I know that you really get what I'm saying about I needed it so badly.

And you're so right that I just kept seeing my to-do list.

And there were many other teachers who helped me with this.

So I've only named a few.

One in particular,

Gina Lake,

I don't know that I would call her a teacher of non-duality,

But Gina has channeled for I think over 20 years.

And in recent years,

She has started to channel Jesus.

And she wrote something called The Jesus Trilogy.

And she just came out with a book called In This World,

But Not Of It.

So I feel that I am in this world,

But not of it.

And for you newbies who may not realize that A Course in Miracles is actually the voice of Jesus channeled through Helen Schucman,

The scribe who took down the words.

So I felt a kinship with Gina.

And she's not the only one.

You know,

There's Glenda Green and many others who have channeled the voice of Jesus each in their own way.

But Gina actually delivered a message to me from Jesus.

And essentially the message was,

It's your time to go deeper and essentially meditate.

I love that.

I absolutely love that.

We could go on about meditation,

But I want to just come back to another point that you made because you just said that the title of her book is In The World,

But Not Of It,

Which brings my mind back to what you said initially,

That despite you being so overwhelmed,

You said that there was a part of your mind that was unmoved by all the seeming troubles that were happening.

And I was wondering if you could say a little bit more about that because that's significant.

Yes.

A message that's been given me years ago and always comes up is that my practice has to do with my smile,

Which has just been with me since I was born.

And many times,

You know,

People would compliment me on my bright smile.

And I was directed inward to that inner light over and over again,

To the point that it's a habit with me that I just know that this light trumps everything.

It is what I am.

And I catch the Amy self buying into the clutter and the overwhelm.

And I'm able to be the observing self that is aware of that.

And that is always available.

What was difficult was that I still felt a very heavy,

Dark kind of feeling.

You know,

You might call it depression.

But to me,

Depression is when you're still somewhat unconscious of why it's happening.

And this was just very pure.

As I said,

It felt energetic.

And I think it came out of four years of intense time spent with Muji.

I feel that I was deliberately compressed so that some deep rooted stuff could just sort of squeeze out of me.

And the reason I can talk about this now,

Cheerfully,

Is because I feel that I have come through the other side.

So I could see the agitation and the overwhelm for what it was,

Even as it had this big impact on me.

There was still this ongoing kind of good cheer.

It's hard to explain because that wasn't fake.

But both things were kind of going on at once.

And I was able to appreciate that it was probably a big ego attack,

And that I did not have to engage with it.

But I also did not want to go into denial about it or repress it.

And that's the subtlety of turning to your spiritual teacher,

Whether inside or outside,

And getting help in navigating the waters of overwhelm.

And there were ways to do that.

And I began to find them.

I love that.

What you said about the awareness that the light is what you are,

And yet you can see how the Amy self buys into the overwhelm.

I feel like that's such a beautiful example of how the Course is leading us to claim our true self,

The capital S self.

And it's almost as if through this work,

Through this practice,

We start to see the split.

We start to see,

As that observer,

The Amy self or the current self getting involved in all the things that they think are important,

That need to be done,

The overwhelm.

And yet there's this ability that sort of comes about this awareness of this stillness inside,

Despite whatever seems to be happening on the surface or around us.

There's this stillness.

And that to me is the gift that I've been experiencing through the Course is this growing awareness of that quiet within that's always there,

Regardless of the external circumstances.

Yes,

And the Course continuously tells us to be still and know that we are God,

To listen in quiet to the wordless Word of God,

To find the Word of God underneath our ego thoughts.

We're always being directed there.

And when I did the workbook practice,

I just jumped into it full force in 1998.

That was a meditative practice.

Mostly the words exercises and practices are used.

But that is meditation.

It is taking time every day to go to sink down and inward,

As the Course puts it.

And 365 days of that really adds up.

I had a spiritual awakening at the end of that time.

And I really never meditated as consistently as that ever again.

So it's not that I'm suggesting to everybody that you need to meditate.

I'm just saying that that's one way to get quiet,

To find the gap between the thoughts,

The little gap.

They say God is in the space between the thoughts.

And when the thoughts are coming so hot and heavy so rapidly,

That it seems like there's no space between them.

That's another way of defining overwhelm.

Wow,

That's so helpful.

I feel moved to just share an image that has helped me with what you're talking about meditation.

And if you listening feel that meditation is something that could be helpful for you.

One of the visualizations that's helped me is this idea of dropping beneath my problem.

So the Corinne self is,

Like we said,

The Amy self,

All preoccupied with the busy doing.

And yet taking a step back,

And I envision it as dropping beneath the problem,

Resting there in that quiet space.

Because what the Course teaches is that all the chatter of the ego is only there to hide the love that's beneath it.

So I like this idea of dropping beneath it and just resting there and just sort of watching that small self do its thing as we step into that place of a deeper awareness.

Yes,

And because the Course uses this phrase sink down and inward,

It also reminds me of the ocean,

That there are choppy waves on the surface of the ocean,

But if you sink down,

It gets very still.

I love that.

I absolutely love that.

So Amy,

What would you say then removes overwhelm?

I love paradoxes.

And so one thing that helped was,

And this is going to be a takeaway for the listeners if they'd like to use it,

Is the idea of giving overwhelm to the Holy Spirit to use for His purpose or Her purpose.

Because in some traditions,

The Holy Spirit is seen as the divine feminine.

So that's a real game switcher.

But suddenly the very weapon that the ego is using against us is turned around.

And so I'm very big on exhaling because when I'm tense,

It's difficult to get an inhale and it just puts more pressure on me.

So what I suggest to people is that they begin with an exhale and just go,

And then a natural inhale will follow.

And as it does,

Just allow yourself to say,

God is in charge,

Not me.

I am willing to be overwhelmed by the peace of God instead of my busy life.

That sounds good.

And then let a tidal wave of peace just really move through you to the point that you may feel the body tingling or humming.

And there can even be this lightness where what we take to be the delineated boundary of our body,

The skin and the edges of the body that we see in the mirror,

That that actually becomes porous.

And there's this sense of union that it really is what the quantum physicists say,

That we are all interconnected.

We are just molecules and atoms vibrating at different speeds.

Would you share what you said about the threadbare sock?

It's a quote that you shared at one of the Course in Miracles conferences.

I think it was the New York one and I heard it and I wrote it down because I just loved it.

Can you bring it to mind and share it with us?

Yeah.

My body is thinning away like the heel of a threadbare sock.

I found that I don't have to memorize that or try to remember it because it was given me these words,

Amy,

Your body is thinning away like the heel of a threadbare sock.

And you know,

That means not just the body,

But the personal identity.

But it felt like a very gentle but vivid way that Jesus was letting me know that I was dissolving back into what I am,

Which is not a personified individual.

It is a light worker,

A miracle worker,

Who has been willing to bring the darkness to the light,

Rather than try to drag the light into the dream to make a happy human story.

And once we really do that,

Once we repeatedly form a habit of bringing the darkness to the light,

There comes a point where we are gently turned around and told,

Now just shine this light back into your world,

As long as it seems that you are still in this dream story.

I love that.

I absolutely love that.

And that image of the threadbare sock has been so powerful for me because to me,

It speaks to the gentleness that this doesn't just,

We don't just wake up one day,

Although perhaps some people have had very sudden awakenings.

It's a gentle process.

It's a process that happens as we're willing to keep turning to Holy Spirit.

And so I want to just go back to what you said about removing overwhelm,

Giving it to Holy Spirit,

Repurposing it,

Rather than it being used on behalf of the ego.

We're now repurposing that overwhelm to be given to spirit to be used to help us wake up.

So I love that repurposing overwhelm.

Yeah,

I love that too.

I love that too.

So I'm wondering if there are any other points that you feel moved to make about overwhelm before we wrap up our show.

I do,

Because what happened towards the end of the year of overwhelm was that I had this big burst of creativity.

I signed up for online marketing courses to really focus on my online business.

And at the beginning of each course,

Which was supposed to focus on something like how to write an ebook and actually format it for Kindle or how to produce an e-course.

All these teachers would say at the beginning,

The first thing you need to do is develop some good habits so that you're not overwhelmed.

And I didn't expect that.

And then Corinne,

You and I talked about Chapter 30 in A Course in Miracles,

Which talks about rules for decision and how to set an intention for the sort of day that you'd like to have.

And when I took a look at Chapter 30,

Which I hadn't read in a while,

The introductory paragraph says that we really need to develop new habits.

So I was just so tickled that it can be marketing masters,

Or it can be Jesus in A Course in Miracles,

But allowing yourself to develop a healthy routine to start with a little prayer or meditation in the morning before you begin your day,

To set an intention to have a day that is guided by spirit so that your work or my work is to simply be a living demonstration of light and miracles,

And to be compassionate with ourselves.

That sometimes we're the one in need of the miracle worker,

And that's fine too.

But this started to reposition the overwhelm,

And the overwhelm changed to a real flood of creative ideas.

That too was problematic,

And it requires prioritizing.

There's the busy work of the phone ringing and the repairman ringing the doorbell that interrupts everything.

And then there's the important work of,

Let's say,

Having to drive over to Home Depot to get the faucets for the bathtub,

Because otherwise I can't take a shower.

But then there's priority work,

And priority work is carving out an hour or two every day to do those things that will keep you on track,

That will either help you follow through on an important goal or stay connected to your spiritual life.

And those priorities must be penciled into your calendar every day,

Even though you're going to be interrupted by what's important and what's urgent.

Priorities have to somehow start to become grooved in to your daily habits,

Just like brushing your teeth.

And if I could add one thing to that,

Just because priorities can even overwhelm us sometimes.

Which do I pick as a priority?

They're all a priority.

I like thinking of my one priority,

Which was what you said before,

Is to give everything to Spirit within,

To inner teacher,

To inner guide.

My one priority is to withhold nothing.

The Course says,

Hold on to nothing.

And so if that's my one priority is to give everything to Holy Spirit,

It's repurposing everything then to be used on behalf of our awakening rather than staying asleep.

So I just wanted to share that.

Oh,

Such a good point.

And just the word one is so telling.

Just one,

One thing.

It's hard to narrow down to one,

But they tend to make themselves clear what that one is.

It might just be,

I've always wanted to write a book and for now I'm going to journal every day.

That's the one thing I'm going to do.

And then if a book is supposed to come through you,

It will.

I think you told us that it took you six years to actually write your book,

But once it was done,

Write Didn't Spirit just kick in and get you a,

Tell us a little bit about that.

Yeah,

I just,

Like you just said,

It took me six years to write the book,

But the moment that it was done,

I secured an agent within two days and a publisher within just a few weeks.

So you just said it beautifully that when you are releasing and repurposing,

Spirit takes over and if it's meant to come through you,

It does and you don't have anything to worry about.

You know,

I just want to say that I love you,

Corinne.

You're so genuine and you really walk the walk.

I feel like you're such a light in the world for all of us.

And I want,

I want you listeners to know I love you too.

Yes,

We love you too.

I love you,

Amy.

Thank you so much for being here with us today on the show.

This is absolutely fantastic.

Stay connected with Amy by joining her email list.

You can find her address in the show notes for our episode and her website is Amy Torres,

ACIM.

Com.

Thanks everybody.

Wasn't that a great conversation about overwhelm?

I love Amy so much.

In addition to Amy's takeaway about giving overwhelm to Spirit,

I have three additional takeaways to add.

Number one,

Peace is in the space between thoughts.

I love how Amy redefined overwhelm as when thoughts are coming so rapidly that it seems like there's no space between them.

So if this is the case,

We can then just drop into our willingness to experience the space between thoughts,

Which actually leads to takeaway number two,

Which is practice meditation in a form that works for you.

So you might feel like you don't have the time,

But I assure you it can be as simple as pausing to take one breath.

This is taking time to go inward and to connect with the part of the mind that is unmoved despite seeming external circumstances.

This is our inner light or our inner smile as Amy calls it.

And number three,

Carve out even a small amount of time for priority work every day.

And if everything seems like a priority,

Remember that there's really only one priority that matters and that is giving everything to spirit,

To our inner teacher.

Thanks so much for tuning in.

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Reviews

This was very pleasant and fun and helpful. I enjoyed it so much. Thank you so much teacher

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