Experience The World Around You

Clay Stevenson strives to find significance in the small moments. In this talk, Clay discusses the distractions that pull us away from experiences the richness of life. He offers encouragement to be present and find a healthy balance between the virtual and the real.

Transcript

I got stuck.

That sometimes happens.

Though I planned out my lecture thoroughly and ran it a few times on my own,

I didn't account for all of the moving pieces.

The PowerPoint shutting down,

The videos buffering,

The technical issues you try to account for but that still end up happening and causing dead air.

When you're speaking to a group of people in a formal setting,

Dead air can be brutal.

As a speaker,

The journey you're taking the audience on comes to a screeching halt and collectively everyone's distracted.

When I was growing up and in school,

These types of situations would give me a chance to talk to my friends.

I remember countless times when the teacher was having trouble getting the overhead projector to focus,

The class would erupt in a cacophony of conversation.

It was loud and exciting.

The noise didn't bother me as a student.

Surprisingly,

I was able to focus on my friend's voice above all the other noise in the classroom with no problem.

And most times,

The teacher would allow this for a few minutes until they got their equipment under control.

Then they'd raise their voice to beseech the class to settle down.

It was time to move on.

And on penalty of detention,

The class would generally give their attention back to the teacher.

And now on the other side of the experience,

Many years later,

As a lecturer,

I've noticed that some things haven't changed.

When I stopped talking and started fiddling with the computer that day,

The class immediately got distracted.

I lost them.

And that was understandable.

Also,

I knew I'd have to pull them back together after I got my equipment under control.

The main difference,

However,

Between this experience and the one of my youth was that as a teacher,

I didn't raise my voice because the class was already silent.

The dead air in my lecture didn't result in a cacophony of noise caused by spontaneous conversations throughout the class.

No,

The students were silent because they were all,

Every one of them,

On their phones.

I've watched college-aged students over the past decade and have grown to love and respect these millennials.

Pew Research Center reported that millennials are the nation's most dogged optimists,

And they believe their own best days are ahead.

They're a generation that is confident,

Connected,

And open to change.

But when it comes to engaging with each other,

What I've observed is that they often do it through their phones and not with the person sitting right next to them in class.

And as I think back to that day in class,

When I got stuck on the technical issue in the middle of my lecture,

I recall that when I walked into the class,

It was silent.

Everyone was on their phones then.

And during the hiccup in my lecture,

Everyone was on their phones.

I couldn't recall more than a few words spoken between students that entire class period.

When I pulled my head up to look around after I got the equipment under control,

Every other head was down.

All of the students were engaged on their phones.

And it made me a little sad.

Honestly,

My students definitely are not the only ones guilty of this.

When I'm in line at a store or in a social environment where people aren't talking to me,

I also find myself going to my phone.

It's comforting to have something to do in a potentially uncomfortable social situation.

Before phones,

I might read something in that situation,

But most likely I would just stand there.

And those moments of being present and observant sometimes led to real physical encounters with others.

Sadly,

These types of encounters are much rarer now that phones are part of the equation.

Asurion,

A global tech care company,

Reported recently that Americans check their phones 96 times a day or once every 10 minutes.

Of course,

There are countless reasons for folks to check their phones.

But doesn't that seem excessive?

Wouldn't it be better for us to put off checking our messages,

Social media,

Current events,

Etc.

Until later?

Isn't it at least slightly concerning that as a culture we're so wrapped up in our virtual world?

A number of studies report health benefits associated with in-person interactions.

Forbes Insight and the Harvard Review both report that the vast majority of people point to face-to-face meetings as a key factor in meaningful business relationships.

In a TED Talk,

Psychologist Susan Pinker said,

Quote,

Face-to-face contact releases a whole cascade of neurotransmitters,

And like a vaccine,

They protect you now in the present and well into the future.

So simply making eye contact with somebody,

Shaking hands,

Giving somebody a high five is enough to release oxytocin,

Which increases your level of trust and it lowers your cortisol levels.

So it lowers your stress and dopamine is generated,

Which gives us a little high and kills pain.

It's like a naturally produced morphine,

End quote.

With this in mind,

I'll be the first to admit that often I'm perfectly fine locked in my virtual world,

Absorbed by the next post or the next news bite that catches my attention.

And also I admit that technologies like smartphones have amazing benefits for humanity.

But I can speak from experience in saying that my life is richer when I make a conscious effort to practice moderation,

Put my phone and computer or device down and interact with the world around me.

I find the life's richness in the sights and sounds of existence,

In the personal interactions with family and friends,

And in the engagement of a stranger while waiting in line,

Passing by while walking down the road or sitting next to them in class.

So how about you?

Do you find yourself engrossed in your device to the exclusion of the world around you?

Are you missing out on meaningful experiences and interactions because of how the virtual world sucks you in?

Do the algorithms of social media entice you to stay online while real life passes you by?

Do the pictures and stories that inundate your feeds cause you to have FOMO,

The fear of missing out?

Is there a chance that like me,

You might be happier spending less time in front of your computer or on your phone?

If so,

I encourage you,

Even if it's in an uncomfortable social situation,

To allow yourself to experience the world around you.

Instead of defaulting to your phone,

See if you could remain present,

Observant,

Engaged in the moment,

Listening to the wisdom of this journey.

Because at junctures like these,

Where your soul and spirit connect to reality,

You might just find the peace and freedom you deserve.

Reviews

I hope some young people listen to this talk. I'm glad I grew up when I did. Thank you for your insight. 💙

Yup you are so right, if I am watching something with my kids and I have to leave the room to do anything, when I come back there is silence, picking their phones up is instant, thankyou for the reminder 💜🌈🙏🌈💜