A Safe Space To Feel Grief

This meditation creates a compassionate space for grief to move through you, naturally and without forcing or pushing. There is no right way to feel or heal, only presence, and your permission to feel what’s true for you in this moment.

Transcript

Welcome.

Take a moment,

Wherever you are,

To notice the very ground beneath you.

Feel the subtle pressure of the floor,

The chair or the bed.

Notice the sensation of being held,

Supported by something solid and unwavering.

This simple act of noticing is a way to come home to the present moment,

To acknowledge your physical presence in the world right here,

Right now.

There is no rush here,

No need to force any particular feeling or outcome.

You are simply and unconditionally invited to be exactly as you are,

With all that is present within you,

Whether it be sadness,

An ache,

Numbness or even a flicker of peace,

Without needing to change a single thing about it.

Allow yourself to settle into the most comfortable position you can find.

Feel the support beneath you.

Let go of any need to hold yourself up or to brace against any sensation.

Allow gravity to take the full weight of your body,

Gently releasing it down into the unwavering support beneath you.

And now,

Bring your full awareness to your breath.

Feel the natural rhythm of your inhale and exhale,

The gentle rise and fall of your chest or abdomen.

There's no need to deepen it,

To control it or to alter its pace.

Simply notice that it's happening,

Effortlessly and continuously.

This breath is your immediate,

Ever-present anchor,

A direct pathway back to this very moment.

In this moment,

You are safe.

Your breath is here.

You are here.

As you continue to breathe,

Allow this simple act of noticing your breath to be your soft cue,

Your gentle invitation to shift your attention fully into the present.

Let your breath anchor you here,

In this moment,

In this body,

Where the truth of your being resides.

This breath,

This presence,

Is your safe container,

A secure space within which you can meet whatever arises.

Now,

Let's normalize the experience of grief.

Grief is a force of nature,

A deep and profoundly human response to loss,

And it manifests in countless ways.

It does not follow rules,

Guidelines or neat timelines.

It moves in waves,

Sometimes gentle,

Sometimes crashing with immense force.

There is no right way to grieve and no predetermined path or duration for healing.

Your grief is unique to you,

And whatever form it takes,

Whatever intensity it holds,

It is valid and deserves your compassionate attention.

It might feel like a heavy ache in your chest,

A tightness in your throat,

A pervasive sense of numbness or a restless,

Agitated energy moving through your body.

It might appear as sudden,

Overwhelming tears,

Moments of intense anger,

Profound sadness or even unexpected periods of peace or laughter.

All of this,

The entire spectrum of human emotion,

Is part of the vast and shifting landscape of grief.

You haven't done anything wrong.

You are simply moving through a profound and transformative human experience.

So if tears arise,

Allow them to flow freely,

Like a river finding its natural course.

If a tremor runs through your body,

Acknowledge it without resistance.

If an unexpected wave of sorrow washes over you,

Let it be present,

Letting it move through you.

There's no need to judge your feelings,

To label them as good or bad,

Or to try to change them or make them disappear.

They are simply moving through you,

Asking for your compassionate attention and acknowledgement.

Grief is not a problem to be solved or a flaw to be corrected.

It is a profound process to be honoured,

Felt and integrated.

Now,

Let's offer ample space for memory,

For sensation and for moments of profound silence.

You might find specific memories arising,

Vivid images,

Familiar sounds,

Distinct feelings or even a particular scent associated with your loss.

Allow these memories to surface gently in your awareness.

You don't have to cling to them or try to recreate them or even push them away.

Just let them pass through your awareness,

Like clouds drifting across the wide open sky of your consciousness.

They are transient,

Like all things.

As memories arise,

Or even independent of them,

You might notice various sensations in your body.

Perhaps a warmth,

A coldness,

A pressure,

A hollowness.

These are the physical manifestations,

The direct echoes of your emotional experience.

Meet these sensations with tenderness and gentle curiosity.

Breathe into them,

Not with the intention to change them or make them disappear,

But simply to acknowledge their presence and offer them spaciousness.

Imagine your breath creating more room around these sensations,

Giving them space to move and soften.

And in between the memories and the sensations,

Allow for moments of profound and extended silence.

These silences are not empty.

They are rich with presence,

With stillness and with the quiet truth that underlies all experience.

Let the silence be a gentle embrace,

Holding all that arises and all that passes,

Providing a deep sense of peace.

As you rest in this space,

We will use body-based grounding to anchor through any intensity that might arise.

When emotions feel overwhelming,

When the waves of grief feel too powerful,

Returning to the simple,

Tangible sensations of the body can provide an immediate and profound sense of stability,

Safety and presence.

Bring your full,

Soft awareness to your feet.

Feel the contact of your feet with the floor,

The bed or whatever surface you're resting upon.

Notice the weight of your feet,

The subtle pressure points,

The sensation of warmth or coolness.

Whatever is present,

Simply notice.

Let your feet be exactly as they are right now,

Completely supported,

Completely grounded.

Slowly allow your awareness to move up your legs.

Notice your ankles,

Your lower legs,

Your calves and your shins.

Feel the weight of your legs being held and supported.

There's no need to grip or brace any muscles.

Simply allow gravity to embrace your limbs,

Letting them feel heavy and settled.

Meet these sensations with kindness,

Just observing them without interference.

Continue your mindful scan up to your knees and your thighs.

Feel the larger muscles,

The density of the bones,

The texture of the skin.

Allow your thighs to drop heavily and deeply into the surface beneath you,

Releasing any unnecessary holding or tension.

Let each part of your body simply be as it is,

Without agenda,

Without the need for it to feel different,

Without judgment.

Your only role is to observe with gentle accepting awareness.

Bring your attention now to your hips and pelvis,

The central foundation of your body.

Notice what is present.

Offer this part of your body your kind,

Curious and tender attention.

That very act of attention itself is what can begin to create a subtle,

Gentle shift.

An opening,

A deeper sense of coming back into connection with yourself.

Now,

Gently guide your awareness up your spine.

Notice your lower back,

Then the middle back,

Then the upper back.

Feel the gentle curve of your spine,

The inherent strength of your back muscles and the points of contact with the surface supporting you.

Let your awareness move like a warm,

Soothing light,

Slowly and steadily,

Without force.

If there are areas of stiffness,

Discomfort or pain,

Simply acknowledge them,

Breathing a soft spaciousness into them,

Offering them gentle permission to be,

Without needing them to change or disappear.

Next,

Bring your full attention to your shoulders.

Notice if your shoulders are hunched,

Tight or tense.

Or maybe they feel relaxed and open.

Allow them to be exactly as they are.

You're not trying to fix them.

You're simply meeting them with a kind,

Accepting and non-judgmental awareness.

Your presence with the sensation,

Your willingness to witness is what truly matters.

Now move your awareness down your arms,

From your upper arms to your elbows,

Forearms,

Wrists and finally into your hands and fingers.

Feel the weight of your arms resting heavily beside you,

Fully supported by the surface.

Notice your hands,

Those remarkable instruments of doing,

Creating,

Connecting and holding.

But in this moment,

They're invited to simply be hands,

Resting in stillness,

Free from any tasks or obligations.

Allow your fingers to gently curl or lie flat,

Whichever feels most natural,

Releasing any unconscious clenching or gripping.

Now bring your attention to your neck and throat.

Notice if there's any tension in your neck muscles.

Allow your head to feel heavy and fully supported by the surface beneath it.

Feel the openness or perhaps any constriction in your throat,

A vital passage for your breath and your voice.

Offer a gentle invitation for softening and releasing in this area.

Finally,

Bring your full awareness to your jaw and face.

Gently soften your jaw,

Allowing your mouth to be slightly open or closed,

Whichever feels most comfortable.

Release any tension in your tongue,

Letting it rest softly in your mouth.

Smooth out any habitual tension in your cheeks,

Around your eyes and across your forehead.

Let your facial expression be calm,

Serene and free from any strain,

Effort or forced composure.

You can just be.

Use long pauses now,

Allowing them to restore your inner rhythm.

These moments of silence are not empty.

They are full of potential,

Full of natural calm.

Let stillness speak louder than any explanation,

Any instruction.

Just allow yourself to receive this quietitude.

As you rest in this quiet awareness,

Continue to feel your breath moving gently.

This is your anchor,

Your steady presence.

Let your body continue to soften and release.

Allow thoughts to come and go without judgment.

They are simply passing through.

Your true self,

Your awareness remains untouched.

Feel the unwavering support beneath you.

You are held.

You are safe.

There is nothing to do,

Nowhere to go.

Just be.

As we gently bring this practice to a close,

Take with you the profound insight that love and pain can coexist without breaking you.

Grief,

By its very nature,

Is a testament to love.

The depth of your pain often reflects the depth of your connection,

The profound love that was shared.

It's a misconception that to heal you must somehow eliminate the pain or separate yourself from it.

Instead,

Healing often involves learning to hold both the love and the pain side by side,

Within the vast compassionate container of your being.

You are not broken by your grief.

You are simply a human being experiencing the profound,

Natural and universal consequences of deep love and subsequent loss.

Your capacity to feel deeply,

To connect profoundly and to mourn fully is a strength,

Not a weakness.

And even in the midst of the most profound sorrow,

The quiet knowing of your inherent wholeness,

Your fundamental peace,

Your innate resilience remains.

This peace was never lost.

It was just temporarily clouded by the intensity of the experience,

By the overwhelming waves of emotion and thought.

But it is always there,

Accessible to you beneath the waves of emotion,

Beneath the layers of thought,

A constant truth within.

So allow yourself to rest in this understanding.

You are not broken.

You are capable of holding both the beauty of love and the ache of pain,

Both the joy of connection and the sorrow of loss,

Without falling apart.

You are resilient.

You are whole and you are worthy of all the compassion and tenderness you can offer yourself.

Thank you for being here.

For offering yourself this safe space to feel,

To breathe and to remember your unwavering capacity for love and for healing.

May you carry this tenderness,

This compassion and this inner knowing with you as you move through your day or into rest.

Reviews

I lost my cat of 20 years on July 1st. She was my greatest Zen teacher. And her final lesson was the ultimate in letting go. That creature brought as much magic and light into my life as anyone else. In fact. She was my longest relationship lol. I miss her terribly. I talk to her everyday. I find her and her brother who passed in 2014 are a beautful anchor to return to when stuck in my head. There were ALWAYS there for me. And I still feel that way. Grief is love expressed fully 🤍